Quiet Time

I would not sleep while they are in another room. Why don't you put up a gate across one of their bedroom doors and nap on the bed in that room while they play? That is what I did when I was pregnant.

Don't worry R.. I think there are plenty of moms out there who have taken a nap from time to time when their kids are still awake. When I was pregnant with my second daughter I would try to sleep on the couch, or in the same room as my oldest daughter. She was only two though. At five and three they'll more or less take care of themselves. Aside from the food and potty issues of course. There is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself and your baby as long as you know the house is safe and that your kids won't try to escape you shouldn't feel guilty. You may want to consider getting them an easle with a chalk board. My kids LOVE theirs. If they color on the wall it comes right off. Also, they like their doodle pro's. Another non-messy toy. Also, music. I tought them to use the cd player and it's freed up countless hours for me! My girls are now 6 and 4 and I will get tired from time to time and doze off. Don't feel guilty!

Congradulations on your pregnancy, & the two beautiful girls. Naturally you would be tired, with everything you have to do, 5 yr. not in school yet? When my children were young even in kintergarden they take naps, in day care they take naps. No tv, lights out, quite music, must lay on cott, no talking, giggling, shhhhhhhh. I would strongly suggest the same, be consistant, same time everyday, ectra. they will get used to it, and look forward to the quite time, you & your new baby will get the rest you need, and the girls will get the rest they need as well + make grandma happy. Best of luck to you. Stress same time everyday, 1hr, to 2hr. Must be consistant.

Wow! I remember those days of being pregnant and tired. I worked a full-time job until I was almost 9 months with my second son. My husband was working two jobs. My mom would watch my son while I was working and let him take 3 + hour naps. So, when I got home he was wide awake and ready to go.
My boys are now 5 and 3 years of age. And it's so hard for them to have "quiet time" they will set and watch TV but I have to be setting right there with them. As Soon as I get up they start arguing over a toy or something.
My husband always take a nap between jobs and before I get home from work. And let me tell you those boys ramsack the place while he is sleep. I don't sleep because I always hear a crash or something or they get into some type of argument and I have to get up to see what is going on. My husband sleeps right through it.
On the rare times when I really need to set down I get a movie that I know will keep their attention or we watch the Sprout channel on cable. I rest on the couch while they set in the floor and watch TV while playing with trucks. I make myself feel better by getting something educational. That way they can at least be learning something.
My boys are not big on coloring but I know girls usually like that sort of thing. Maybe one of those large coloring books and some crayons will buy you a little sleeping time. Try to use dinner time to buy you some time to put your feet up for a couple of minutes. While they are busy eating take that time to just relax. Also, if they are not napping during the day will they at least go to bed by 8:00 p.m. If so that would give a break too.
Good luck.

there have been plenty of times i have fallen asleep on the couch while my girls were palying, don't feel bad. as far as quiet time sometimes if i need a few minutes (or 20) i will send both girls to the same room. my girls are 6 and 2. so they can play or watch a movie.

R.; yes i thing what you are doing is fine, first of all i would not tell the mom what you do during the day if it stresses her out, you need to sleep, and your quiet time, and yes things can happen in a split second that you turn your eyes, i was a very watchful mom yet one of my children climbed to the top of the fridge without me knowing it, things happen in our sight, and i used to nap with my children around but i would have them in living room with tv on and i would be on the couch sleeping, but they would come into my face and stare into my eyes, and smile that i was still there, they would play, there are times you just need to sleep, however one time i was sick and could not stay awake, i woke up to chilling screams, my son had gotten the 409 and was spraying it in his hair, as he had seen me use spray bottles in my hair, and he got some in his eyes, ifelt bad that i did not be there to prevent it, but he was ok i flushed his eyes out immediately and he was fine in like ten minutes, but things can happen quickly and it can be a concern, so even being alert things can happen and being asleep things can happen, it wont matter if they are a kid that will do things they will, your naps are not prolonged, and it seems you got some good girls, keep up the good work, dont fret over the daily routine, of things, it seems your girls are all ready used to this routine, and seem to do very well, when the baby comes, you will probably need rest then too, be a good trainer to your children, and they will not fail you , have a good day D. s

Hi Rachael,

I also have two girls. One is 4 and the other 19 months. Here are my thoughts. We have to keep our sanity for our kids. However we have to achieve that we need to take it. As moms we know our children better than anyone else. We know what they can handle and how they react to situations. My oldest stopped napping almost 2 years ago but she is able to entertain herself. I also lost two babies that is hard. I am 32 years old and have been married for 7 years. I hope this has been at least comforting.

M.

Hey I know the feeling. I dozed quite a bit with my 2 year old playing in the living room next to me. I'd say your mom just doesn't remember how tired all this can make you. ;)

Don't feel guilty for having to take a nap. The video is a good idea for keeping them quiet and occupied. But I'd say, you're the mama...if you tell them to play quietly in their room, they're both old enough to obey. You might have a day or two of taking them back in when they come out, or get too loud, but they'll learn.

I was in the same situation. I would put in a full length video (hour, hour+half) with the volume on low and sleep on the couch while my daughters watched. Folded burp cloths work great to block any light from your eyes. That way I was right there if they needed me or to hear if they were getting into anything. Your girls sound old enough to understand if you explained that you need the extra rest for the baby.

Good Luck!

Quiet times at my house consist of the 2 yr old going down for a nap and the 8 and 5 yr old (I also do daycare so there could also be a 7 yr old and another 5 yr old here)quietly watch a movie. We practice being quiet. Watching a movie means WATCHING... Not jumping up and down or using our loud voices. :-)

Since I am also preggers with our 4th I totally know what you mean about wanting to nap... On the days I have other peoples kids here I will not allow myself to. Just isn't responsible... But on the days its just me and mine, I will take a pillow and blanket and actually lay in the doorway of the room the kids are in. All our rooms only have one doorway and they have to climb over me to get out. Automatic alarm clock. :-) Its something that MY mom actually suggested.

I think its easier for me since I do have the 8 yr old that is and always has been the little mommy type... So she helps out lots with the younger kids when needed.

Lay down the expectations, tell them the expectations and they will get the idea pretty quick. Practice the "baby" is sleeping games so that they know when the baby is sleeping the noise can not get to rockstar levels. :-)

I don't let the kids off the "napping " schedule till they are a bit over 3. The 2 yr old should still go in the room and get tucked in. Yes, she will probibly play in there... But she may also dose off at some point. If there is lots of noise coming from teh room go back in there, tuck her back in and walk out again. Its "quiet time". After they are 3- 3 1/2 then I will let them watch the movie with the older kids instead of laying in their room. And by watching a movie I mean the kids are laying on a sofa with a pillow and blanket watching it... Sometimes they dose off... :-)

Good luck and rest up!!!

Try having them do "craft" projects. Set everything up for them at the kitchen table, try noodle necklaces... there are a ton of craft ideas for their ages. Tell them that the craft is for daddy when he gets home or to take to grandma. When you have #3 this would be an ideal time to sit down and do the craft with them when baby is sleeping. Also add some crafts to their christmas list that are quiet. Crayola has a bunch of new ones out.
What about dress up games. They are quiet. Get a trunk and fill it with silly clothes from goodwill. Hats, scarves, ect. The girls could play quietly together. Get them a cheep camera and tell them to take pictures for you.
Goodwill is also a great place to buy "play" dishes. Buy plastic, less noisy. Spatulas, wooden spoons, ect. Tell them to make you a cake.
Would the older one watch a movie while you and the baby take a nap together? Lay down with her in your bad at her regular nap time. That way both of you get a rest. You c
ould also move a porta crib upstairs for her naps so you could all be on the same level. You need to explain to the girls that if they are no longer going to take naps that they still have to be quiet and choose a quiet activity. No TV, loud toys, games. If they comply they get a sticker... worked for me when I was five. But whatever works for them. Puzzles are quiet, card games, coloring, ect. They do need to learn this skill regardless of anything else. Quiet time will foster imagination, pretend play, act as a stress reliever even for a three year old. We all need down time.
Also our daughter, 16 mon. goes to "Mom's Morning Out" at a local church on wed. mornings for three hours. Check around to see if there is one near you. It would wear the kids out and give you a chance to catch up on chores or naps. I am assuming your five year old will be going to kindergarden soon... How about a pre-school program for your three year old??? There are local two day programs at churches near us. Two days, three hour mornings for $120 a month. Pretty in-expensive and it would give you a break. If you have any retired grandparents in the neighborhood that you would trust with your children just let them know that you are pregnant and the girls are underfoot while you are trying to get some chores done or you just plain don't feel good and would like to lie down and would they mind watching the kids for just an hour so you can cool down. Also if you offer to watch a friends child if they could take yours for a few hours. Use your resources, friends, neighbors, family, church, even the YMCA has activities and programs. Let everyone know that you are low on energy and ask if they can step in.
As for your mother. I would just say that you need to make your children aware of what you are doing and make it clear what they are to do in case of.... For example" Mommy needs to go lie down." If you need me... If someone comes to the door... If the phone rings... "You are to stay here and watch... You can have these milk and cookies. Do not leave this room." Make things very clear to them, what is expected of them when alone. Does your oldest understand 911? Be honest with them and tell them "Mommy needs a break, and mommy needs to be alone." There is nothing wrong with that. You know that your home is safe, baby proofed I hope. If you have taken every precaution snooze away. Teaching them to be alone and feel safe and secure about it is good for them and you. There are a lot of parenting books that talk about fostering alone time and or quiet time in a toddler. Do some research and read up.

My oldest was 5 when my third was born, so I understand. What I did was talk to my oldest and explain that she needed to be "responsible" for her younger sister. I gave them the "rules". Do not leave this room. Do not go outside. Do not answer the phone or the door. Wake me up if you need anything, etc. It help make my oldest with her self esteem and she developed into a great helper. I had my middle child watch the clock (since he timed the rest time) and let me know when the clock was on the 10 or the 12 and worked on his numbers, but gave hime a "responsibility" as well. The can help more than you think. I would have them fold towels, rinse dished or even vacuum while I rested. The felt empowered by doing adult things and helped me tremendously.