Question About Half Brothers/sisters and Full Brothers/sisters

Sometimes kids want to use precise language - maybe that's why he's using the term half-brother and half-sister because know what is what is important to him. If he's not showing other signs of feeling left out, maybe just take it at face value.

My oldest child was adopted by my husband who is the father to my younger two children. My daughter called him a "half brother" when she was around 7 and I asked her what half is her brother... top half, bottom half? I told her that a brother is a brother, we don't say half or whole. She also told him that my husband's parents weren't his grandparents because he was adopted. My husband and his sister were both adopted also so I pointed out to her that if that makes a difference then poor grandma and grandpa doesn't have any grandkids since dad and his sister was adopted. This really bothered her since she is very close with her grandparents so i never heard it before. With your step son saying that i would take a glass of water and color it with blue food coloring, then I would take another glass of water with yellow then tell him that when you are a family you blend together to make a special family. Have him poor the yellow water in with the blue and show how it blends to make it one family that can't be seperated into different families again. You could even ask him to seperate the "families" again to make a point. Tell him that while he may have a different biological mom, he is a son of your heart and that is a very special son to be.

I would remind him that "blood" has nothing to do with love. Just because you are blood related doesn't mean that there will be love there. My step-father adopted me when I was young because my birth father left. I loved my father more than I can explain and he love me more than he could say, and we weren't blood related at all. God makes many types of families, and I would ask him why it matters so much to him. His half-siblings are technically blood related, so he does have that. I would ask him why he thinks it would be cool to have a full brother or sister? How would that be any different than what he has? Is he thinking down the road he's going to need a kidney or something? lol I don't mean to make light of it, but maybe he just doesn't realize that families are made up in many different ways and love is the most important thing. (I also have a birth daughter and an adopted daughter and to be honest, I can't remember which is which sometimes.)

I can understand how haerd this much be on everyone. I have a half brother and sister. I do however have a full brother, but the age rang of all of us also left me and and Only child in the home. It can get confusing . I think probley what is going on is that he feels a bit alone, even though he has loads of people around him who loves him. What I would say about this is jsut reinforce the feeling of family, of him belongeing. You words like brother and sister with him. "you little sister is so lucky to have a big brother like you looking our for her" " you brother loves it when you are here with us! You are so important to him" "the baby likes to smile at you. she know that your her brother" At first he might say thing like but I am not her full brother, and I would say, but your her borther and that makes you important. I would also give him improtant "BIG BROTHER" jods to do. feed the baby. read a book to the little ones. whatever works for your family!
As for the not ever having a full bro or sis I would say thats a convo for you DH to have with him. Is a veary loving way (maybe away from the little one...over Ice Cream jsut the 2 of them) tell him the his mother and him (the father) both love him, but jsut could not be togather. And whill there wont be any full siblings, he dose have sidlings that love and need him jsut as much as a full one would.
Also I would try to get some one on one time with the both of you so that he know that you love him. Dad take him to the park, and you to a move....things like that.
I hope this help a little! My best wishes are with you and you family dear!!

What a mess for your step child to have to live with all these other people...mom, dad, stepmom, mom's boyfried, all sorts of kids...of course he's going to be confused....who wouldn't in that situation?

1-Sit and talk with him and answer all and any of his questions. Perhaps he should do this with his mom and dad only?

2 - Explain that he's lucky to have all these siblings regardless of blood...many people don't have any...and many people don't even talk to their full siblings. Tell him there's nothing more important that family...they're the only ones you can ever really rely on.

3- Get him counseling. Just because his parents decided to move on and get new families doesn't mean he's adjusted to this or wants this or knows how to handle this. I think that divorced parents neglect tor realize that their children have been ripped in half by divorce and they are children and don' t know how to handle those feelings.

He's caught in the middle.
Can you or your hubby spend some good quality time with just him. No siblings involved?
My son felt the same for a long time. He has three half siblings and they are all over 6 years his junior. For a long time he felt like he didn't belong. My husband, his stepfather, at about 10 started taking him to guy movies. The Hulk, Wolverine, Star Wars, Harry POtter.. It helped, but it was not a cure all.
My son is now almost 21 and when he comes home, he lives in Japan, he and dad: still go out to movies without us girls.

My daughter is also part of a blended family when she's with her father - and I just picked up a little sign near the Valentine's stuff at Target for her. It says, "Family is not about who you live with, but about who you can't live without." At nine, he probably doesn't want a hanging sign that says something like that, but I really liked the sentiment.

Some of his comments/questions are him just figuring things out. Family structure can be a little confusing for kids, and they want to talk about it. I have a 7 year-old daughter, who has much older half-brother & sister. Those two have two half sisters (so not blood related to my daughter). My daughter has come to say "I have a brother and three sisters!". But she is still asking questions to understand how this happened.

My daughter will also play on my sympathy about "not having a sister my age". The vast majority of time, she loves being basically an "only child" because of all the attention she gets. When she wants a playmate, then it's my fault for waiting until I was "too old" so that I can't have a baby for her to play with :-)

I would not overreact to your stepson's comments, just answer him matter of factly. Making this into a big deal could lead to him feeling like he does have something to be sad about, when it sounds like he has a family who cares about him! Many of his friends or classmates likely have similar, somewhat complicated, family structures.

Hi. Both my husband and my nephew are in similar situations.

My husband has 2 half brothers from his Dad's first marriage, he's from the 2nd, and he has a step-brother from the 3rd.

My nephew has 4 half sisters from his mom's first marriage, he is the only child of my brother-in-law, and he has a half sister from his mom's current marriage.

Its all been a bit complicated to explain to my kids, but we try to talk openly about who's who as far as a family tree goes, how families are made up of many different people all with different life stories, but on a day to day basis, we don't use the labels. Everyone is just a brother, sister, or uncle. No halfs, steps. Everyone treats everyone like a 'whole' blood sibling.

Sorry if this doesn't help.
M.