My daughter has not liked school since the moment she started (at preK). HOWEVER, keep this in mind, I have been told by every teacher to date that she is the ideal student. She participates, is very smart, learns well, and follows rules. However, when she is home she rarely talks about what she does in school. She hates doing homework and even fights me on it. And then talks about how much she dislikes school. She has friends and in fact I've always noticed girls always flock around her. She has liked every teacher to date and in fact will admit she loves her teacher this year. But....she always tells me how much she hates school.
I was talking to my brother one time who stated he never liked school either. He said, he knew it was something he had to do but enjoyed nothing about it. He said, I'm sure I enjoyed the occasional friendships and certain things but overall I did not like school. I on the other hand loved school. I even liked getting homework. (I know sometimes I think thats weird) I could not wait to go back to school after summer break.
Oh and I like that someone up there is looking out for me because my youngest just started preschool and ABSOLUTELY loves it! Which is great for me because I don't think I could handle another kid not liking it.
So does anyone else have a child like my oldest? Or have you ever? Did it get better? I should mention my oldest is now in 1st grade and my youngest just started preschool.
Thank you so much for the replies, they help. Unfortunately being a working mom, homeschooling is not an option and in all honesty I don't think she would like me being her teacher anyway. It helps to know I'm not alone. My dad said it best when he said she would rather be playing. Now that she is looking back she tells me all the time how she wishes she could go back to preschool when she just got to play all day. Too bad she didn't realize that at the time of preschool, would have at least made that year easier.
I guess all I can hope for is that the older she gets the more she realizes its something she has to do. I have talks with her all the time about growing up and responsibilities. They do seem to help. But boy would life be easier if she just liked school. :)
I never really liked school very much, but I always did well in school. Ironically, now I'm a teacher.
It might be that your oldest is bored. You've described everything that a gifted or accelerated child is. I remember disliking school sometimes because the teachers moved so slow! I was already understanding and ready to move on and we had to wait for the entire class.
She just might need a challenge. I enjoyed the classes that allowed me to challenge myself.
My child, a first grader, is not a huge "lover" of school. However, she excels at it (gets straight "outstandings" across the board), has many friends and is a leader that her peers look to, according to her former teachers. She's been in school since she was 3, in preschool. When I query her about what she doesn't like about it, she just says that she'd rather spend time with me and her dad and that she misses us when she's at school. She's an only child, so I always remind her that school is the best place to make friends and some of the friends that I have are the ones that I've known since I was a kid in school. I also focus heavily how much fun learning new things really is and she does agree with me. I'm seeing a little bit of an improvement this year in her attitude as opposed to last year's kindergarten class because two girls that she had a love/hate relationship are in a different class this year and for that I'm very happy! You know, the classic frenemies!
I just got off the phone with a friend who is most likely moving her son from our elementary school to the public Montessori in town. He does fine grade-wise, has plenty of friends, and no real social issues she can find. He hates it though, and says so every day (3rd grade). After sending the kid to counseling and exploring the issue as best she can, she thinks it's just the environment, which is fairly traditional in the classroom with set schedules and expectations of doing work. Although the boy can do the work, he hates having no control over the environment and freaks when timed on tasks (timed math facts are big around these parts). The bottom line is there ARE other options when it comes to the kind of education we get, I don't think anyone should have to be miserable in school, even if many of the factors seem fine.
I am in the very same boat as you are! My son comes home everyday and tells me how much he hates school. The only thing he likes about it is when he is in the halls, he will at times see one of his friends from the block walking in the hall at the same time.
I have emailed his teacher and she said he's doing fine and is one of the more social kids in class (which shocks me). So, I know he is doing fine... but it does drive me crazy.
I was told (and I'm not sure if this is true) that they should just do homework 10 minutes at a time per grade. So, right now, I sit with him twice a night and go over homework for 10 minutes at a time. He seems to like going against a timer (he sets my phone) and seems to be doing great with it.
Trust me I understand this completely. My son will fight going to school in the mornings and even at home he will complain about school, how he hates school, though there is never a reason for the hate, just doesn't like it. I think its all the rules and what not they have to follow there. He is usually fine once he gets to school, but even when he gets how he cries and runs to mommy. Though I think right now, alot of it has to do with my divorce, and hes afraid he will not see me after school. But Other wise hes pretty much the same. Though he does like learning, but only on his terms, not mine. Laughs.
I was similar to your daughter but I didn't fight the homework like she does. I did hate it, though. I put a great deal of pressure on myself to do well and to put it very simply, I would have rather been home with mom.
Oh boy can I relate.
My older son was the exact same way, even though he was liked by his peers, a very good athlete, and a good student. The only thing that was ever brought to my attention, by teachers/administrators, was that he rarely talked (therefore in a rigid Catholic school he was celebrated LOL).
After watching his little brother homeschool for a few years, he joined us in 10th grade. I finally had the courage to let him try it, and he stunned me with how happy he was, and how much he THRIVED. He even branched out and started acting AND singing AND playing guitar/piano! We're talking about one of the shyest kids at his school! Even long-time teachers at his former school (who attended one of his plays) were stunned. As was I.
So, that's our story. I just wanted to let you know that my son felt the same way and it truly perplexed me. Even moving on to high school didn't help.
PS: Other than bullying I usually liked school too.
