Problems in Preschool

I think I would ask the teachers about it. I wouldn't question the "scolding" until I found out more and then if I didn't like the answer I would question it and perhaps offer alternatives. Without knowing the entire situation, it makes hard to know what to do! :) Questions are never a bad thing.

When I had my child care center I had a mom call me one day to see if I had any opening for a toddler, a 4yr. old and a school ager that went to a school I took kids to. I rearranged a bit so I could take them and they started the next day. I found out the mom had driven up to the previous center the day before and her toddler had been sitting in the parking lot playing in the gravel, his class didn't even know he was missing. She was obviously upset. I can tell you that child was Houdini. He could undo every safety latch I had, he could open any door in my center, he found his way in the kitchen, my office, etc...I nearly had to hire a teacher just to watch him. I had to terminate them after a month or so, I just couldn't keep up with him and watch all the children. They went back to the same center they had come from. They kept their kids there until they were too old to go anymore.

So, I imagine the teacher had missed your child and been upset when she couldn't find her on the playground. When she finally found her she may have been a little more upset and the scolding was a bit harsher.

At K's preschool they prop the door open and if a child needs to go to the bathroom one of the teachers take them and the other ends up with all the kids for a few minutes but the one inside can still hear what's going on outside. Talk to the teacher to get the whole picture. If she was out of line in her conduct in anyway that is abusive then report her to her Director.

If you need to tell her to not talk to your child that way then do it without your child present. Your child needs to see you being supportive of her teacher. If you undermine her authority in the classroom it could cause your child to think it's okay to not listen to her.

When I was a nanny for several years I had a situation come up where I told a child to do something and they looked at me like I was nuts and wouldn't do it. I put them in time out and they told their mom on me when she got home. The mom told all her kids that they had hired me to be there when they couldn't and it was the kids job to mind me, if there was a problem with what I had asked them to do she would talk to me. Then she asked me to come in her office and talk. She informed me the kids weren't allowed to do what I had told them to do and she would never tell me that in front of the kids because she wanted them to mind me. That it would undermine my authority. So I always tried to remember that lesson.

I had a similar situation with my school & I questioned it. I was out front about to go in & get my daughter when she came out with her back pack. She could not open the door from the outside, but could push it open from the inside. So, if I had not been there, she would have been stuck outside about 4 feet from a busy road. I was livid & very curious as to how she had made it out of her classroom. I went back in & told substitute teacher what happened & she actually got onto my daughter telling her she knew better than to do that! I didn't say a thing to the teacher cuz there were kids present, but I did write a letter to the school letting them know that I felt it was unacceptable & I wanted to know what they have done to prevent it from happening again. They called immediately & apologized & they implemented some procedures to help it from happening again & they changed a wall from solid to glass so that office staff could monitor the front doors. We all get used to do things one way & don't foresee problems until they occur, but if you see a problematic situation, speak up by all means.

you have every right to question and know exactly what's going on, and to advocate for your child when necessary. i do suggest that you do so in an 'information gathering' spirit and not accusatory. if you've ever tried to monitor 21 wiggly kids you can appreciate the complexity. of course schools MUST be constantly on guard for safety and security issues, but that's why they have rules, why kids are instructed in the rules, and scolded when they break them. if parents are infuriated (rightly) by children slipping away and being unattended, they must also accept that children will be disciplined appropriately for trying to do so.
khairete
S.

Of course you should say something!!! I own a preschool and if a child is left unattended for one second that is a BIG issue. What if she walked out the door and onto the street. It is a teachers job to keep a head count at all times. Children should not be coming and going throughout the school. When we are outdoors and a child has to use the potty I have enough staff outside to bring a child indoors to use the bathroom. A child never goes on their own. As far as scolding her, she should have been supervised and not allowed to wander, so it is not her fault. I agree she should have been spoken to about never leaving on her own, but it is in a child's nature to explore on their own and it is up to us to keep them safe. Safety first. In NJ the ratio for 4 year old children is 1 teacher to 12 students so the ratio seems right on target. I would still get to the bottom of how your child was given the opportunity to wander off unnoticed. A staff member should be stationed at each exit and entrance to avoid these types of situations. In NJ that is a huge fine for non supervision of children.

T., you must say something to the head of the preschool! I had some pretty scary incidences with my daughter's day care because there was not enough teachers for the amount of children.
I would also suggest checking what the student-teacher ratio is for her age group. I think it's 10:1.

Definately say something!!! Don't jump to conclusions, but DO ask questions and figure out what went on. NEVER be afraid to find out what is going on at your childs daycare/preschool..always be involved! You child should be watched at all times. You are definately not "overanalyzing"!!

Hi T.,
As a day care worker in Va, I will tell you that this classroom was out of ratio. The max number of 4 year olds that should be with one staff member would be 8. This incident needs to not only be reported to the administration of the school, but also to the local licensing agency (usually part of social services). You are absolutely not over analyzing this situation. The teachers in the room should have been in position to see what all of the children were doing, even if there were only 2 teachers, it sounds like they were standing around socializing with each other instead of doing their job of watching and engaging the children. Please contact your local social services agency so that they can monitor the situation and make sure that this doesn't happen again, to your daughter or her classmates. Lack of supervision is what causes most accidents in preschools.

I work in a preschool and you absolutely have to speak to the administration about the incident. The children must be watched at all times. I agree with one mom who stated about checking the ratio for a 4 year old classroom. The ratio's must go with the youngest child in the classroom. If you are in virginia, you can check on virginia's website, www.dss.virginia.gov (I think that is the website). 21 four year olds for two teachers seems like a lot of kids.

We had a similar situation with our 2 yo last year during the Christmas concert. They let parents come up to the stage to get their kids and he followed a group of parents out of the room. It took 20 panic filled minutes to find him and my husband was ready to pull him out then and there (we never did get an apology). This year I warned the teachers that he would wander if not watched and they better keep track of him. They looked at me like I had 2 heads, until they said at a rehearsal they caught him getting in line with another class and walking out. The school needs to realize that this is happening, because if something happens to a child on their watch, they are liable.

if the teacher ONLY scolded your daughter and no one else then yes, speak up and say, hey, wait a second, two other kids went out that door with
my child, and you are only scolding HER, i dont think so ! on the other hand, where were the teachers, and why did they not have someone posted at the
door to begin with ?two teachers for 21 preschoolers is not enough, they are
short but quick. the preschoolers, not the teachers obviously
K. h.