OK, here is what happened this morning. We were waiting for the school bus this morning and my oldest son was playing with a neighbor kid in his yard (It also happens to be where the bus stop is) when another neighbor yelled at them to get out of the "garden"(it is an area with dirt and rocks. No plants were getting trampled). Both boys were getting out and my son said, "I'm not in her garden". This neighbor, not the one who lives there, starts yelling at my child. I politely asked her not to yell at my son, that I would handle it, and so she started yelling at me. She began calling my son names and telling me that he is the rudest kid on the block and that I could ask anyone and they would tell me. Now I am not one of those parents that is oblivious to how my child acts. If he is bad, I want to know so I can handle it. But I have had compliments from neighbors, friends and complete strangers on how well behaved my older 2 kids are. So, I take my kids back to my driveway and my son is in tears. I could have killed her, but I didn't say anything to her. I told my son that everything was fine and that he didn't do anything wrong. I can only imagine how bad his day was. I told my kids that they are to have nothing to do with her or her daughter and that they were to sit together on the bus. What do you think?
I forgot to mention that I have had problems with her little girl being bossy to my daughter and calling her names. There were also 3 times where my daughter came home and told us that her daughter told her to pull her pants down. They have not been able to play together for quite a while anywhere other than the bus stop.
I think that I will let it die down a bit and just avoid her. If she apologizes then I will speak, but the kids will stay in our yard until the bus comes. I spoke with the driver of the bus today and told her that there was an issue with another parent and that I did not want our daughters sitting together because I was afraid that her daughter would do or say something inappropriate. Hopefully things will be fine with the new situation. My kids can't do anything wrong if they are in my yard and I am watching them!
don't back down! people are so freaking rude and they need to be called out! the fighting side of me would say beat her a**!!!But wait until the kids are at school...LOL
I dont think that your neighbor responded right, and i think you gave your kid the best advice
Well first off I wouldn't punish the little girl for her mothers actions. if my kids wanted to play with the child then I wouldn't tell them not to. What I would try to do first is (not around the children) see if she would have a civil conversation with me. If not then take it up a step. talk to the school/ the bus people and see if there is another bus stop close to the house that your kids could go to to avoid this lady. if not explain the situation to them and see what they have to say about it. My kids are not old enough for school yet however I did have to raise my youngest sister. She had something similar to this happen to her when she was younger. I do know that the school usually over looks these kids of things. I had to take it to the law enforcement. There are many choices you can make. if you need anything else let me know. I hope this helps and that you and your kids can turn this around and have a great school year.
I think you did the right thing by keeping your cool in front of your children and taking the out of that situation. that woman or man whoever yelled at your children should be ashamed of themselves. I woul just keep them away from that person and like you said have your two kids sit together obn the bus.
I think that you done the right thing and that you don't have to put up with someone treating you and your kids that way! I personally think that the lady has some personal issues she needs to deal with and the next best thing for you to do is just pray for her. Ask God to please forgive her because she doesn't know any better! Keep your head up and keep talking to your kids about positive things. Much Luv.....CoCo
You dont need to worry about your neighbor. You obliously know your kids better than she does. you did the right thing not to argue with that woman because it could only escalate.You did the right thing for him to not to play her daughter i'm sure he had other friends. Dont let this stress you. You have other things positive to think about, your kids, and pursuing a carrer.
We have a neighbor like that and my grandchildren are afraid of her. When she first moved in, she was nice and we would talk across the fence. My grandson would help dig holes for her to plant flowers and she would give him cookies.
All of a sudden the kids couldn't walk in front of her yard or play too near the fence. The kids didn't understand and were in tears. She also complained about our dog leaving fleas on her porch so we told her to stop feeding her and she would stay home.
I went to talk to her one day and she was drunk. That explained the sudden behavour. Now the kids ignor her and it is a shame people can't enjoy children.
I only have 3 grandchildren but at least 50 call me grandma and I love it.
Maybe if you would talk to her, without children, she may be differnt than you think.
You have every right to be upset. If the woman had a problem with what your child was doing, she should have politely asked him not to do it anymore, or asked you to tell him so. She had no right to yell at him. If she wanted to tell you that she thought he wasn't well behaved, she should have pulled you aside at a later time and privately told you. There is no reason to say that in front of him. After all, children are a reflection of their parents and all suggestions on behavior should be directed to us, not our children. As for the garden, there may have been something planted there recently that needs tender care to grow, but that is no excuse for her to take the tone she did with your son. I agree with your decision to no longer associate with her and her family...
Hi C.,
Wow, sounds like you have a real touchy neighbor there!! I have a feeling that what your neighbor did was to make your son the victim of how kids have treated her space/yard/garden in the past. My suggestion would be to continue to keep your cool (good job, by the way - I would have gone off on her right there) and to drive your kids to the bus stop and sit in the car with them until the bus arrives. That way, there's no way any further incidents will occur and you know your kids are safe. Hope that helps and Good Luck!
I hate that that occured with your children. I would feel the same way that you do.I would not have liked it in any way. esp if my son was crying over it. I think that you should contact the school board and let them know that there has been a problem with a neighbor around the bus stop. Mainly so it is documented about the occurance. She may be a rude jude and treat more children and their parents like that. You might want to also ask the person who lives at the house where the stop is located if he/she has a probelm with the bus stop being located there or the children playing in the yard. It could be that you unfortunately have a nosy person who thinks that she has all the answers and has to be the watchdog of the neighborhood.I wish you the best. Hopefully this will never occur again.
I see that alot of people gave you good advice and praised you for keeping your cool,granted that's a good thing but I think I agree with Laura on this one.I had a a problem with a neighbor also a few months back.It was a couple about the same age as me and my husband with a boy just a few months older than my son, they live right behind us so I thought this was perfect for my son since he wasnt in school yet.After a couple of months these people started showing major signs of immaturity.They drink,me and my husband only do it on occasion but maybe twice a yr but at first we didnt see a problem with their drinking...until one day which triggered many that she come over our house late at night..about midnight asking us to call the cops b/c her and her boyfriend were arguing....this seemed to happen often. We KINDLY asked them time and time again to stay home when they were drinking or fighting.They just wouldnt get the hint...the last straw was one day they came over drunk and starting physically FIGHTING in our home!My husband goes to kick them out and the girl lays in the middle of our kitchen floor and begins to take her pants off!Her boyfriend is calling her all kinds of names....well I was watching my 2 children and her son so that they wouldnt see this behavior...I finally got angry and told him that if he didnt leave my house that he was gonna be taking a trip in an ambulance,he took the hint and took off. I had to literally drag her across our yards to her front door...I called a friend of hers b/c it was getting dark and she most certainly wasnt in any position to take care of her son.Her friend actually had the nerve to ask me to take care of the kid until morning for her...naturally I had to explain to her with an attitude that I have 2 children of my own and how irresponsible it was to trust someone else they didnt know with her kid.Her parents finally came and got them both but even after all that they came back and tried the same thing,so my husband finally said. "Look I know when u drink you forget but if you all cant stay sober and act like adults,dont come back and we explained that we had nothing against their little boy and that he was still welcome and would be treated no differently. My husband told them both this...but I was most certainly not letting my son back over there.They naturally took offense and a few days later I saw the little boy playing outside so I let my son outside so he could play and they let waited until he was halfway over and literally rushed inside and let their little boy stand at their front door taunting him...and of course this made me so mad that I could have used them as my hood orniment but I took the high road..I flicked them a bird lol and grabbed my crying son and went back in the house...I still didnt feel better better b/c it made me so mad how they acted toward my kid and after I had done so much for them.A few weeks later I got my moment when her man came over late at night again drunk and asking to use the phone...I aswered the door and he said, "I know were not talking but can I use your phone." Well lets just say he got his answer as soon as my door hit his face hehe.Sorry but as a mother...no one...and I mean no one treats or speaks to my child the way that lady did to your son, If it were me, I would have responded with...Look lady Im sorry my kid was in ur plants, he didnt know..but next time you even so much as look at my son wrong, your gonna be toting around a fat lip with that mouth." And that would be that on my end.Either way you made the right decision on not letting her kids play with yours...I did the same after my neighbors did what they did, they let their son drink and he acted just like his dad so I was relieved to not have my son around such a bad influence.
I think I would have to politely go and have a word with her when the children are not around. She sounds like she has some major issues.
Hi C.:
Unfortunately there are bully children in the world and there are bully parents. I would do exactly what you are doing. I would not let my children play with her children but I would try to have a civil conversation with her regarding what is going on. She is probably just mean but with children you never know. One of your children may have done something offensive to her child. You never know until you ask. It is always best to take the high road and rise above than to bring yourself down to that level. You will be demonstating good communication and problem solving skills to you children.
