Preschool: I'm So Confused, How Do I Really Know If My Little Boy Is Ready?

Hi,

My little guy is 16 months and I do not feel ready to drop him off at preschool just yet. I am putting it off till he is 2 years old, because I feel he will have plenty of time to be in school and I do not want to miss this precious time with him. He will be in school for many years once he starts, so I think if you can spend the time with him now do it. Enroll in mommy and me classes, that way he can be with kids and play and you also share in that. We take 2-3 classes per week, so I know he spends time playing and socializing. Best of luck in exploring all you otpions.

Hi There,
If in your heart you feel you or he is not ready to have him go to school and there is no need for him to go (like you have to work or you really need a mental/physical break a few mornings a week), then hold off on sending him another year or so.
The socialization he would be getting at preschool you can get from joining a playgroup or from taking some kind of class. Everything else he would get (stimulation, motor skill development, etc.) he can get from being with you.
I don't think going would do him any harm, but it sounds like you're not ready, so why push it if you don't need to? Enjoy your time with him and don't feel bad for waiting another year or 2.

dear E.
let me share with you my experience, my 2 girls are today 51/2 and soon 4 (they`re about 21 month apart)and i both had them home with me until almost 3 which mean for a whole year i had them both.
My mom did the same with us and i wanted too,
Any how it`s a very personnal choice and it depend on differents things:1st of course is financially, do you plan on having more childrens, to be completly honest having a 2 year old home with a baby was very challenging ( maybe also because i didn`t have a car at the time and no family to hang with)
also it depemd on your child personnality, they are growing faster physically and emotionnaly than us, and what was good yesterday sometimes is not good anymore tomorrow
i suggest if you decide to keep him with you full time to have a schedule that alternate children activity and house chores. it`s the good time now that you can get him use to do things with you, laundry shopping etc...
their is a lot of activities that i can mention to you on a daily basis, if you are interested
about school you can also decide to send him couple of hours a day, it`s not a bad things! and it` can give you a little time on your own which evry mom is always missing
please feel free to contact me if you want to talk more, all those year, my strengh came from the inteaction with others moms doing the same like me
all the best,and remember what`s really matter is the quality of the time we share with them and the love

Hi, again, E.!

Well...since you have a choice, that's good. When my son was about that age, I had to go back to work, so I had to get him into daycare whether he was ready or not. I'm very glad that you are able to make the choice, rather than to be forced into it. That is a reason to celebrate.

I think there are some factors you can use to decide whether or not your boy is ready for the daycare/preschool experience. First of all, are there similar experiences avaiable to him already, such as playgroups, pre-K Sunday school or nursery, or children's church, where he is with a teacher and a bunch of other kids, but away from you? If so, how does he respond? Does he like the experience, or does he have trouble with it? And in general, does he have a lot of separation anxiety when you leave him with someone else?

If he seems to enjoy or at least adjust well to these kinds of situations, then he may be ready for pre-K. Bear in mind that boys quite often are not ready as early as girls are for socializing without Mom being in the room. It's not a hard and fast rule, but in general, boys need a little more time to mature than girls do when it comes to pre-K.

On the other hand, if he seems to have a lot of anxiety or is otherwise uncomfortable in social situations when you have to leave, it might be wise to wait, spend more mother-son time, and possibly introduce him to similar experiences gradually so that he can adjust gradually to pre-K. Then, if your situation changes and you HAVE to get him into daycare in order to work, it won't be so traumatic (for both of you!).

BTW, you and I are almost neighbors! I live in North Miami Beach, just a few miles south of Aventura ( : Howdy, neighbor!

I hope this is helpful. Personally, if I didn't HAVE to send a very young kid to school, I would keep him or her close to me for as long as possible. Everything he might learn at pre-K can be taught at home, in museums, in parks, in the supermarket, at the playground, at church, etc. But follow your heart, and not what society might be pressuring you to do. I think as long as you do not isolate the two of you, and you keep on giving him socially stimulating and mind-stimulating, fun experiences, you can't go wrong by giving him your time and happy nurturing.

Peace,
Syl

My suggestion at his age is do not put him in a preschool so young if you do not have to. Instead, enroll in some mommy and me, swimming, social interactions or even just visit the park, the museum....spend as much time w/your little guy as you can because they grow up so fast. Now, if you are enrolling him for just a few hours a week, just so you can get out to do things for yourself, then by all means do it - you definitely need time for yourself!

I agree with the other moms if you are able to stay home with him do so! when he's 2 and half then think about it agian and just start with two days half days or whatever schedule fits your needs! Take time to spend with your little man he only little once! My daughter's going to be 3 in two months she started and she started school in January of this year for two days at first then over the summer three and now I'm really getting back to work so she'll be going every day for 41/2 hours! Sometimes I wish it was still the two days because she does so much better and is so much happier when I'm available to her more! On the other hand she does like to be with her friends and play! Good luck on whatever you decide!

You are really lucky to have the ability to stay home and spend time with him taking him places, etc. Like you said - he's going to be in school his whole childhood. Enjoy this time with him. I unfortunately have to work do I have no option, but there really isn't a need to send a child that young to preschool as long as you socialize him with other kids regularly. Maybe half days when he's 2 1/2?

Oh Dear,

I so understand how u feel. My son even though he is 20mths will also start this August but I do understand where u are coming from. I am taking comfort in knowing that at thjis stage I have trained him well enough and that the school environment is one where he will be comfortable.
Make sure u are comfortable with the school and bring him to his orientation and read books that he can understand he will be starting school soon. U will be surprised how much better he will adapt to the environment than u thought he would.
All the best
Grace

E. - He is so young, if you don't have to send him to preschool so that you can work, why don't you just join some Mommy and Me groups / classes and have fun with him? My son is almost 28 months now and the time has flown by. He is in school, 3 days a week so that I can work but if I were able to stay home with him, I wouldn't send him before 3 and maybe not at all! They have VPK here for 4 year olds and it is free...so you can do that when he is 4 and there is absolutely no requirement that you do any sort of school before kindergarten. Preschool is a good idea for only children or children who have challenges (HeadStart, etc.) but it is not necessary for children who are well socialized with other children (including sibling). Have fun with him, the time goes by so quickly!!!

By the way, I am 36 and the oldest of three. I never went to any sort of preschool other than what they had at church on Sundays while my parents went to mass. I did that starting when I was 4 1/2. I did very well in school, graduated in the top 1% of my high school, went to university, got a bachelors and a masters and am fairly successful in my chosen profession. I don't think I missed a thing by not going to preschool and I have great memories of helping my mom with my younger brother and sister and all the fun we had together before I went to kindergarten. We lived in Connecticut at the time and kindergarten there was only 4 hours a day so I didn't attend school full time until the first grade. VPK was put in place as a way to provide subsidized by the state daycare - there are no rigorous academic studies saying that VPK is necessary.

C.

Maybe you should only try only half a day and see how that works for you. If you are able to wait, maybe wait until he is at least 18 months.