Potty Training Woes - Albany,NY

Updated on October 24, 2007
C.A. asks from Albany, NY
10 answers

My daughter is 3 years old. Every time I metion the potty she states no and refuses. She goes at school with prompting. I want to put her in preschool but she cant until she is potty trained. Any tricks that worker for you. She knows when she goes or has to go but wont.

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the suggestions. I am gonna try some this weekend. Ill post how it goes :)

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C.C.

answers from Rochester on

My daughter did the same thing. She was completely potty trained at 2, even in underwear- then I had to go have another baby. She went straight back to the pull-ups.

She started pre-school in her pull-ups. Her teacher and everyone tried to get her to use the bathroom but she wouldn't. We tried charts, rewards, threats, everything.

It wasn't until her big scary aunt gave her a verbal lashing and went off about how she was too big for her diapers did she finally use the potty and go back to her underwear. Instead of a big scary aunt maybe you could have her grandmother or doctor talk to her.

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A.P.

answers from New York on

Here's how I did it: Skipped pull-ups because kids are way too smart to not figure out they're still just diapers and bought a bunch of colorful underware with favorite cartoon characters. We talked about how she's a big girl and all that, but I kinda tricket her with the panties, I told her Cinderella,Ariel etc would be said if she wouldn't use potty...Start first thing in the morning,and then remind her often. You can give her a reward every time she does a good job (sticker, candy, whatever you choose). If it looks like she is not buying it, leave ot for a week and then start again, sometimes they just get like that because we force it too much. Just be patient and make sure you have a back up in clothes...

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi C.,

A few things that you might think about.

Due to the common use of disposable diapers and pullups, most children don't really understand what's going on in their body, they've never felt really wet when they pee. This means that they don't have a strong motivation to use the toilet. A switch to cloth diapering or cloth training pants can serve as motivation to use the toilet and also for them to learn what happens when they pee (they get really wet) and recognize what it feels like just before this happens.

At over 3 years, it's very likely that your daughter knows when she has to go, but just isn't doing it. If you're using disposable diapers/training pants, take away that crutch. Let her know that using the toilet is expected behavior. I never used bribes because that makes it seem that using the toilet is something that you want them to do, rather than something you expect or something that they should want themselves. Let her know every hour or hour and a half that you expect her to visit the toilet. Don't ask if she wants to or has to, just make it an expectation.

Good luck!

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L.S.

answers from Jamestown on

I agree with skipping the pull-ups. My boys both trained very quickly once I put them in "big boy undies". We did Blues Clues and I told them that Blue would not be happy if he got pooped or peed on!

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J.M.

answers from Rochester on

OK, this will sound insane...But my 3 year old also, was not interested and I also wanted to put her in Pre-School. Another mom suggested I let her run around the house naked (I used a dress, with nothing under it) and she also said I would only have to clean up 1 or 2 messes. Well, my gosh, she was right. My daughter was potty trained in ONE day after having one "accident". (Thank godness for hard wood floors).

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A.S.

answers from Rochester on

My daughter turned 3 last week and does the same as yours. She has enjoyed sitting on the potty since she could walk, but she's still not "potty trained". I would definitely skip the pull ups except when absolutely necessary. She hates to be wet when she's wearing undies. My biggest problem is asking her on a routine basis to go try. Usually when I ask her, she does know whether she needs to go or not. Also, its a nuisance to keep washing all those ruined outfits and cleaning up messes in the house. I am encouraged that it won't be much longer until she masters this skill, though.

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S.R.

answers from New York on

Try bribing her with stickers, new underwear, whatever works. I had to give mine stickers for a while, his cousin would not go on the pot, until her mother took her out to a store and let her pick out an insert.

Also make sure her potty situation is comfortable. Sometimes they resist going on a pot because they do not feel secure. You should have a stool that is broad enough for them to turn around on comfortably and safely, and touch flat footed when they are seated, if they use the big potty. Dangling feet are OK after they get more comfortable.

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T.H.

answers from New York on

My son was potty trained by the time he was 1. After he would eat and drink - I would bring him to the bathroom about a 1/2 hour later and have him sit down with a book. I'd sit there with him while he looks through his book and before I knew it, he would go. I would jump up and down and say YAY!!! Yes, I made it a huge deal and he loved it. He would have his accidents here and there which was expected. You might want to tell her it's a big girl thing to do and maybe you can divert her attention to a book. Encourage her constantly. I hope my experience helps you.

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J.F.

answers from New York on

Try DVD "Once upon a potty" (Barnes and Noble). Worked wonders for me. Just let her watch it for a while without any comments from you. Hopefully she will ask for the potty herself.
Good luck!

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E.G.

answers from Albany on

My advice is not to push the issue. My duaghter had an extremely hard time potty training, to the point that she would hold in bowel moevments for a week because she didn't want to go on the toilet. I had to give her suppositories and laxatives. She is now 6 and because of the potty training issues she stills has a problem with bowel movements. Let her do it at her own speed you don't want to cause more problems, my daughter was not fully trained until she was close to 5, but my son is now training at 2. Every kid is different. Good luck!

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