Potty Training -- Reluctant 3.5 Year Old

Ditch the diapers, pull-ups and rewards. Have him sit longer than a moment. Also have him do his part at clean-up of messes. If he likes school I would tell him he will have to stop going until he uses the potty all the time. Have him sit at regular intervals, every 30 minutes, then every hour once he's got some experience going, and don't ask if he has to go, say something like "It's time to use the potty!"

Another mama posted this link earlier and I hope it helps:
http://parentingtouchstones.com/01/10-techniques-to-toile...

My daughter was very similar - she wanted nothing to do with the toilet and didn't even want to wear underpants. But was turning 4 in August and preschool was not going to be as lenient with potty training as they were this past year (she wore pull-ups and the teacher let it slide). I talked to her about from time to time, let her know they would not let her go to school in diapers or pull-ups. That she would have to use the potty to go to school (and she knows what school is and loves it) and we would have to stop wearing diapers soon. So finally one morning when I knew we would have a few days to just stay home and not go anywhere, I just took the diaper off of her when she got up, put the underpants on her, and said we are going to start using the potty now. She had an absolute fit about it but I didn't care anymore. She had a few accidents the first day in her pants, wore a diaper to bed, had another accident the second day but started getting that look on her face and dancing around when she had to go. So I just led her to the potty and made her sit down on it. She was still pitching a fit about it but still ended up peeing on it. And after it happened a few more times, and she got rewarded for it (a few M&Ms and a stamp on the calender) she had it down. That was 2 months ago. I think it only took less than a week to get her going pee on the potty 100% of the time. She's even been dry at night so she's just in underwear for bed. Poop has taken a little while longer, but she's getting better - she will still have poop accidents in her pants sometimes but she's getting it in the potty more often now.

Just about everyone told me that she will potty train when she is ready to. I knew she was physically ready but just being very stubborn. A few people did suggest the "cold turkey" approach and it worked for us. We just let her know this is what she is now expected to start doing and she's done great! Even her preschool teacher thought we did a great job, since you can see how proud our daughter is of herself for going on the potty now and we helped her achieve this goal and feel successful.

It took my son until he was 4yo 3mo to be ready to potty train, and about 1 week and we were done. You can read my past potty training related posts and see what people suggested there. Honestly, the general answer you are going to hear and after going thru the issue, I will agree, you can not pressure him about it nor can you expect him to do it in anything but his own time. This is something you can not force when he is ready it will happen and he will just have to stay where he is until it happens or the school can find a way to be supportive.

I've been a preschool teacher for more than a decade and I get this question all the time. I often tell parents that summer is the best time to transition to underwear. Make sure he plays a role in picking out the "new big boy underwear." Boys love this. Remember to give lots of praise for going in the potty, a dance or song always helps. Also try using a sticker chart. He can earn a sticker on the chart every time he goes potty. If he goes in the potty three time a day, he gets a "big boy treat or prize". Good luck!

I think this is the best time to potty train a kid. Send him outside with just shorts on. Peeing down his leg should be a deterrant enough.

We put a potty seat on our deck with a roll of TP. If there is an "accident" Just hose him and the deck down. My kids quickly got the idea that taking a break to sit was better than the alternative.

For me, I think underpants are just another thing to have to wash (when you're at home dealing with the bulk of "accidents") and training pants/pull ups just teach kids it's OK to still pee in their pants.

If you do have to go out, do so immediately after he pees. And put a "pee pad" under him in his car seat, bring extra clothes and you can always hide a pee pad in the shopping cart under a blanket too. (You can buy them in the adult incontenience section.)

If he says he doesn't like it, tell him not to pee pee in his pants or tell you if he needs to go to the bathroom. And that until he keeps his pants dry you HAVE TO protect the seats.

Like anything, it's a process. Most drs will tell you that physically, 3 yr olds should be very capable (physically) of holding their pee and using a toilet. Unfortunately we all use diapers long beyond when they are capable, which then leaves us "stuck" with the battle of wills.

We've all been there.

Best wishes.

My son is the same age and he just conquered this in the past two weeks. We've been talking about it for awhile-so have his teachers, but he's been completely ambivilent. He didnt even care if he was wearing underwear and soiled them. Then a few weekends ago it was nice out so I let him be naked outside-he could see himself pee. Suddenly a few days later I noticed him pull open his diaper to watch himself and we were off. He didn't even make an issue about the pooping. He pooped once in the little potty and now does it all on his own in the big. One thing that we didn't force was sitting on the pot to pee. He seems to totally get it if he can stand like daddy.

I think it just has to click-now he doesn't want to be dirty either. He also wants his privacy and makes us shut the door!

It's partly awesome and partly makes me so sad that he's so big!
p.s-I had also started telling him that he had to learn soon cuz our diaper supply was going to run out--but I don't know for sure if that had any affect!

My son was three year and eight months last summer when he trained the week before preschool started. I was so sure that he wasn't going to "get" potty-training in time that I had already talked to his preschool teachers about him wearing a pull-up and calling my if he had a "solids" emergency.

After many failed attempts and my son not caring about wet underwear, we tried letting him go around the house in just a T-shirt. There were a few accidents, but with frequent potty-sitting, he figured it out. I put a potty in front of the TV, and I encouraged him to sit on it frequently. If he went in it, I immediately rewarded him. He likes chocolate, and I actually gave him a Hershey Kiss every time he had success. I think by the third day, he realized the reward part, and he actually ended up with 16 Hershey kisses by repeatedly making himself pee a little bit in the potty. I didn't care. I was then able to distract him or only reward him every other visit to reduce the amount of chocolate he got each day.

Follow your instinct on how to work with your son. What works for one does not always work for others. Good luck!