Potty Training Boy - Colorado Springs,CO

First, don't ask him if he needs to go (not until he's pretty much accident free). Every 30 minutes or so say, "It's time to go potty," and take him. If he protests, be very matter-of-fact, firm but kind and otherwise unemotional.

Second, ditch the diapers, pull-ups, etc. Real underwear only. It might be a pain at first, but you will survive and he will do much better. You might want to just buy a few packs and toss them when they get soiled rather than washing them out.

At 3 1/2, he will more than likely do just fine after a couple of days. I suspect this isn't a matter of him not being ready. He might not realize he can do it. Try not to get emotional, just be very matter-of-fact and consistent. He'll get it!!!

I had the EXACT same problem with my son. I kept doing things people told me to try and it never worked for him. Then one evening he said "mommy, I have to potty" and HE DID IT! He had a few accidents but for like a month we celebrated each pee pee in the potty by dancing and singing and picking out a small piece of candy. Now it was not until a month or so later that he decided to go poopy. He so desperately wanted a big Buzz Lightyear toy but i was so expensive. we told him he had to go poop on the potty if he wanted his big Buzz toy. He would mention it here and there and we would remind him. I never put a diaper back on him after he peed in the potty. He just went poo in his pants and I would jst patiently clean him up. BUT he eventually stated one morning "Mama, I have to go poopy on the potty." I left him alone on his potty chair upstairs and he called when he was don. I walked into the bathroom and the first thing he said was "I GET MY BIG BUZZ!", sure enough he went poo poo in the potty. Never had a problem ever since. But I pretty much let him decide when he wanted to potty train. I kept reading in different places that if you force it it can prolong the process. He will eventually get it. Good luck Mama!

My son was like that. He just wasn't ready. Give it a rest for a few weeks or longer. You may be right about the attention thing if you are convinced he has full control. But the argument also gives him attention - some kids like even negative attention.

Meantime, you can comment on the little brother's stinky diapers and show that changing him takes time away from playing with him. I don't think kids understand "diapers are expensive" so I wouldn't comment on that, but I think they do understand "playtime" vs. "changing and wiping time." You can give up the prizes I think since it isn't working. If he asks, tell him you're stopping because it doesn't work. Wait until he's ready and try again.

Best advice I was given..... STOP talking about it all together. Not one word! Once he sees that it isn't an issue anymore and isn't getting the attention from you (always asking and trying to get him to go) he will come back around.
We did that with my daughter and sure enough within a week it was lots of, remember when I used to go on the potty and remember when I would do this or that regarding potty training, ect?? We just would say that's nice and move on. Well she got pretty mad and so we sat down and asked, are you ready then?? Because until you are, we aren't going to talk about it and you can just stay in your diapers.
She said she was ready and we had a throwing away the diapers celebration. Sure there were a few bumps in the road and a bit of laudry for a few days, but soon she realized there were no more diapers.
Haven't looked back since....
So just STOP bringing it up and see what HE does about that.

I used this book and it worked great: http://www.amazon.com/Potty-Training-Boys-Easy-Quickly--E...

It isn't one of those "train in one day" methods. It is slow and steady, but it was better than creating a power struggle.

Good luck!

Sounds like he sees using the potty not as a positive experience, but merely an obligation that does not get him any of what he wants – and you are right, if you have a baby in the family (for how long, now?), he wants more of the attention going to the baby. Because of that, regression is so common as to be "normal" after the arrival of a baby.

You say he was getting "close" before the baby, but that could mean any number of things to you that might have a very different color if you could ask your son. What was his age at the time? If he was three or younger, that's really pretty much on the early side for a boy to be successfully trained. Many kids, especially boys, often simply need more physical and emotional maturity for potty training to work. Some don't get there until around 4 or even later, and that's without the complication of major family changes.

Here's an extremely informative website you might find helpful. It gives a few variations on"readiness" checklists, plus tips on various training strategies, the best ages to start them, and the advantages and disadvantages of each approach: http://www.parentingscience.com/toilet-training-readiness...

As difficult as it is to have two children in diapers, long, difficult training with many accidents is probably even worse – certain worse for the child. There are so many ways negative attitudes and fear of failure can creep in. So you might do yourself and your son a favor to put off further training for a bit, until he can come at it fresh and perhaps with a greater ability to connect the dots between urges and 'outcomes.'

There are also lots of positive things you can do: continue to make all your messages about using the bathroom as positive as possible. That can include modeling how easy/quick it is for you or Daddy, reading potty books or watching potty videos, having his toys/stuffed animals role-play pottying, and in general making a game of it. With my grandson, once he could do it but didn't want to take the time, I would go into the bathroom and begin noisily ejecting all the dinosaurs that were crowding the room and sitting all over the toilet seat. My grandson couldn't resist that game, and would come in and help me wrestle the beasts, and claim his spot on the toilet.

Wishing you the best.