Potty Training After 3 Years

I think that Judie, Wendolyn, Mindy, and Wendy all gave you great advice. Heres a game you can make of going pee, this will also help with his aim. Put 4 or 5 Cheerios in the toilet and have him try to sink them. But really Wendolyn's right if he doesn't like being wet or mussy, he's more likely to stop. Try letting him flush after you go potty, ask him if would he like to, anyway. Show him how the toilet tank works, open it up while you flush it, but let him look at the inside and explain to him how it works first. Good Luck.

Hi D.,

I have a six year old girl and a three year old boy (he was three in July). My girl didn't want anything to do with it until she was almost 4 years old. And they say girls are easier to train :-) Anyway, I went through a year trying my best to 'train' her, which at times was very frustrating...anyway, she woke up one day and decided that she doesn't want any more diapers and THAT WAS IT. My son went pee in the toilett just before he turned three no problems...but he is not doing going # 2...Long story short, I would stop with what you are doing. Sometimes they are just not ready, specially if he is afraid of the potty. Let it go for another few months and try again...
Good luck. I think this is one of the hardest things!

If you are not shy, the ebst way is too casually announce when you have to pee or poop and let him see you go on the potty. Take him shopping and let him pick out his own potty - whether it is the seat that goes on the potty (dont forget the step stool) or the potty that gpoes on the floor. Also, dpn't push him. The harder you push the harder he'll resist. Trust me all kids eventually potty train. My son (now 15) was potty trained at 3 1/2. He didnt want to do it and one day he did and never had an accident. My daughter gave up the diaper on her 3rd bday and it took a month to get the accidents under control. Now shes fine.

I will say that potty training has its own problems. Once trained you won't be able to go to a store, restaurant, office, etc. without him wanting to use the potty!!!! lol I have seen more public bathrooms in the past 3 months than I have seen in my lifetime!!!! Good luck.

I'm not so sure persistance is the key to potty training. Definitely consistence between you and your mom.
You want to make it fun and don't punish or get mad at him. Try a routine, for example at bath time tell him (don't ask because that implies he can say no)"sit on the potty before you get into the bath tub". Even if nothing comes out praise him for sitting.

If he is afraid right now I wouldn't push. Don't mention "potty" for a few days then go back and try it w/ a different approach. Take him out shopping to buy new big boy underpants.

Is there some reason other than his age that you want him trained right now? Boys do tend to take a little longer than girls. Do you know what your mom does w/ him in regards to the potty while she watches him?

Don't stress too much over this, if you relax he will relax. Good Luck!

Not to be rude, but watch out for grandmas. They can be very pressuring. (We went to the hospital to give birth to baby #2 and came home to find the house filled with potty chairs, our son in underwear, etc -- but then he refused potty AND diapers and we were ruined for weeks!)

What we did was confiscate the potty chairs for a month. No mention of them, no pressure. Maybe a fun video here and there, Elmo or Bear in the Big Blue House are good potty videos -- but let him have a month to come to it on his own. If he doesn't, then have No Pants week (keep the house warm; we did this in August, so we were outside a lot) with no diapers or anything, and see if he can choose the potty then. It'll be messy; maybe give diapers if he wants to poop. And I would do it on a 3-day weekend so YOU can be in charge of it.

Of course, what do I know. I sound all authoritative above -- that's not the way I want to come across. trust your wisdom as you read these responses, and most of all, let your son know you love him regardless of the potty!

Hi D.,
If you're using an actual kiddie potty, I'd get rid of it and try the regular toilet. While my kids were not afraid of the potty, they never actually made a deposit in it, and when I tried the big toilet, that worked. At 3, I would keep away from rewards or bribes, and make it seem that using the toilet is something you expect of him, not something he is doing to please you.
Is he wearing disposable diapers or pullups? These products don't really allow him to feel wetness. If you switch to cloth diapers or training pants, he'll feel really wet when he goes and have some motivation to use the toilet instead, as well as learning what it feels like just before he gets really wet so he'll learn when he needs to use the toilet.
About a month before my son turned 3, I did the cloth trainers with waterproof outer layer, and took him to the bathroom every hour and a half. The first couple of weeks, he used the training pants like a diaper and after that, he started waiting to go til I took him to the toilet
Good luck!

http://www.3daypottytraining.com/

I swear by it...! My son was not even close to using the potty till I tried this. It took about a week and a half but only b/c I was using the "try" method.

Good luck! If you do decide to use this site (I think it's only $24, and worth every penny!) I'd love to hear how it turns out for you.

my friend used m & m's as rewards and it worked. Does he have his own potty for now....don't flush it when he is there, maybe the sound scares him (where did it go???).. Patience and persistance yes....good luck, might be a late starter too.

If you mom is with him for 10-12 hours a day, it may be her approach to potty training that is making him afraid of the potty. You may want to talk to your mom about her approach/technique. It may be too that he's simply not ready yet. The best approach that worked with me with all three kids was going cold turkey. No diapers during the day at all. It's a pain in the beginning as you have a lot of accidents but it usually works. But the key is to time it right. Your child should be exhibiting signs of willingness to try the potty, if not. You may want to wait a bit until he feels comfortable again. Forcing the issue will not work.
S. in CT

I used the 3daypottytraining e-book too and it worked perfectly. They do advocate giving all other methods a rest for at least 30 days before you get started. Letting him know that you're just going to forget it for now should help with his fearfullness. Good luck to you.

I went thru the same thing with my youngest boy. He was 3 and was afraid of the potty, too. I tried everything. Finally I put my foot down and put him on the potty kicking and screaming and told him to sit there until he finally went or got married! He screamed for about a half hour. Then suddenly he got very quiet. He had gone pee! He was so surprised he didn't know what to do. Then he got excited! He was trained from that day on.

My firstborn son said: "Sure!" well, it sounded more like "Shoo-ah!"When my husband brought home the potty and asked Cooper if he wanted to use it and go potty just like Daddy does. He was trained right away, just because he wanted to, not from anything special we did or didn't do. My younger son however, absolutely refused and we did not make a big deal of it. Just dropped it. We'd bring it up every once in a while, but he was so set on not using it, that we just let him keep his diapers. He was four years and 3 months when he decided to use the potty and there was no helping from anyone. He told us to go away, he closed the door, used the potty, wiped himself and that was it! Best to let the child be ready on his own terms. Don't stress him out. Good luck.
D. N.

Dear D., You may have to leave it alone for a while. There is really no right age. It is a level of maturity. I know changing diapers for a 3 year old can be rough because I have been there. One of my 5 was difficult to train but he did in his own time. If you don't already have one, get a Potty movie. My grandchildren loved it. They showed a 4 year old birthday party and they were celebrating his being a big boy. The last thing you need is premanent bathroom issues. Best wishes, Grandma Mary