Potty Training Advice Please? - Bel Air,MD

You won't confuse her by putting her back in diapers. She's really young. There's a lot of time between 18 mo. and 3 years old. When she's ready, it'll take little effort and even less time!

I started putting my daughter on her potty while I ran her bath every night when she was 14 months old. She peed almost every time. Then I moved to pull-ups for a time and increasing the times I put her on the potty. Eventually I let her be naked from the waist down at home and by then she would usually make the potty when she needed to go. By the time I could send her to daycare in panties, she was 26 months old. She had one accident at daycare after that. If I hadn't had to deal with daycare insisting that any child under 2 1/2 was too young to train, she would've been completely trained before 2.

My mother's criteria was: if they can walk, say "potty", and pull down their own pants, they are old enough to start potty training. But yes, be exceedingly patient. There can be a long time between the time between they will stay dry when put regularly on the potty, and the time they will independently go to the potty.

#1 rule for potty-training: self-awareness.

not saying the words, but knowing beforehand that she needs to go potty & is able to make the choice to hold it & run to the bathroom.

until this self-awareness begins, it's simply a matter of mommy training herself to run baby girl to the bathroom.

doesn't matter whether it's diapers, pullups, or undies....it won't change the results. :)

sorry, can't give you the answer you've requested. :)

Both of my kids pee trained at 18 months (they poop and nigh-trained at 21 months).. I let them run around naked for 15 minutes a day. When my son decided he wanted to be naked all day, I would put the potty seat in the room he was playing in.

Just clean up the messes. She will get it faster. Better yet, take her outside.Put her in a long shirt and just play.

Now, with that said, she will need your help for a good 6 months. Toddlers are easily distracted, so they do wait too long. You will have to remind and ask. When you know she needs to go, don't ask, ask this way "let's go potty and go outside to play. Do you want to use the toilet before or after mommy?" "Do you want to use the toilet before or after snack?

Put pants on her when she is putting 90% of her pee in the potty.

Don't listen to the negative crowd. The rest of the world potty trains by 18 months, only in America do people prefer to change diapers than to take kids to the toilet. Kids are never to early to learn about where pee and poop go!

You are training at a great time. Old enough to be mobile and young enough to want to please you. It is the age at which 90% of American children were finished training in the days before disposables - so I would simply disregard people who say she is too young. Physiology hasn't changed since the 1950s. Fully half of the world's children are trained by 12 months today (http://www.nytimes.com/2005/10/09/nyregion/09diapers.html.... I was fully trained in under a week at 13 months, my sister at 14 months and my brother at 18 months. You will do fine.

I tried naked all the time for about 1 day and I just couldn't handle my son peeing all over - he thought is was as much fun to pee on the floor as in the toilet. I just put him in regular underwear all the time, took him to the bathroom (used a seat cover, not a potty) and told him pee and poop go in the toilet. I took him every time he woke up, after all meals and if he had not been in 1-1/2 to 2 hours. It took 3-4 days of frequent accidents, 2-3 more days of occasional accidents and 2 more accidents over the next month.
I did not do rewards, stickers, or excessive praise. I just presented it as an expectation, just like I expected to brush his teeth and get him dressed every day and just like I expected him to sit in his carseat. I did have him come in to the bathroom with DH and me so he knew what it was for.

Julie G is right - you will have to tell her when it is time to go for a while - my son would never voluntarily stop running around to go to the bathroom without a reminder. Or by the time he realized it is was seconds before he needed to go. Still - it's not like they tell you they are planning to use their diapers in 5 minutes either.

Potty readiness is a newly invented concept. My son had zero signs - never dry in the morning (ok, maybe once when he was about 13 months old), never asked to go to the bathroom, not self dressing, no interest in other people using the toilet. Fortunately I had also never heard of potty readiness so - together he trained in a week.

my daughter trained herself at 3, i waited until she told me, it was right after her 3rd bday we went n she picked out her own panties and she was day trained in two days. if she isnt ready she isnt ready and let her tell you, i started and stopped a few times from 24 months on

Pull ups are a tool that keeps the pee off the floor but allows the child to pull them up and down like real panties. If you want to be cleaning pee and pooh off your floors for the next year or so then panties or her being naked is fine.

She is very very young for you to expect her to actually be potty trained. She is not too young to introduce it like you are saying. With over 13 years in child care I can tell you that a majority of children don't even start potty training seriously until they are at lest 3 years old.

My MIL insists that my hubby was potty trained by the time he could sit up. You and I both know that he did not have the cognitive ability to understand going to the bathroom or have any sort of bodily control over those organs. She just has his pee and pooh times down so much that she knew right about when he was going to go and sat him on the little potty.

Same with little kids. We may think they are getting it but left to their own devices they will not go on their own. They go on command when we sit them on the potty. They would forget completely if not verbally prompted.

So do continue to be patient. She will most likely be doing very well in about a year to a year and a half.

My daughter actually pee trained herself at 18 months, changed her own diaper (it was on backwards which was how I knew) and stayed dry at night from that day as well, so you won't get any advice to wait from me ツ Little ones are so much smarter and in tune with their bodies than we give them credit for, and readiness can be taught. I've also found that if you miss your window of opportunity to train them it will then take longer as you'll meet more resistance from them later on when they're more set in their ways. Poop training was the difficult part for my daughter, she refused to do it in a potty or toilet until she was 3. My guy also had a problem with that at first as many little ones do, so I think the fact your daughter is pooping on the potty shows she's off to a great start.

Keep her naked from the waist down and take her every 15 -20 minutes to sit on the potty, don't ask her, just say, "It's time to go potty." One of those times she will coincidentally pee, and as she does it more and more often she'll make that connection with feeling the urge and following through. Once she's doing good about going on the potty and not peeing all over the house put her in cloth trainers, (I used the Gerber ones for all my kids) so if she has an accident she'll feel it. Pull-ups do act like diapers and wick the wet away, so there's no incentive not to go in them, they feel the wet and mess in a cloth trainer. You can use a cover over them when you go out or for naps and bedtime (I doubled the trainers up at night) so she can use them all the time. Until she's staying dry you can use waterproof pads on the furniture or carpet or floor she's sitting and playing on in case of an accident, either ones you have already for her crib or the plastic ones sold near the diapers and pull-ups.

As you find her "schedule" of needing to go you can adjust the length of time between taking her to go potty, just make sure you take her when she wakes up first thing in the morning, before and/or after meals, going outside, and naps and bedtime. Don't worry if she doesn't tell you she needs to go, my guy never really has, unless we're out and he needs me to find him a bathroom. You get good at figuring out their cues of needing to go, and getting them to the potty quickly ; ) My guy trained at 27 months, and has always just gone and done his business without announcing what he's going to do. If I'd waited for him to tell me we'd still be waiting, and he turned 3 in April.

I'd save the panties until she has it down pretty well with not many accidents, they can be her "reward." Keep in mind the average length of time to potty train a child is 3 to 6 months for both pee and poop training, night training happens when their bodies can do it, which might be years away.

Just be consistent and hopefully by the time she's 2 she'll be done ツ

She's peeing all over the house because she is too young to potty train. There IS a reason you shouldn't get started, Mom. It has nothing to do with you being a SAHM full time. It has nothing to do with you. This is all about your daughter, not about your wishes.

Potty training can be frustrating, difficult, full of emotions and wet clothes and wet carpets and tears and anger. OR... it can be easy and laid back and quiet and enjoyable. Which one you would rather have is the one you are going to get. Keep trying to potty train her when YOU want, and you'll get the first one. Wait for her to be ready, which is when she is older, between 2 1/2 and 3 most likely, after SHE is showing signs of readiness, and you'll have the 2nd one.

You are not going to successfully potty train an 18 month old.

You are not going to confuse her by stopping. That way of thinking is about an ADULT - not a baby.

One thing that you need to remember about OLDER toddlers (around 3) is that they can only control two things in their little lives. Eating and toileting. If you fight with them about either thing, you will LOSE.

You need to read about child development. It is really important that you start to understand the difference in little children's minds and adult's minds. You might not want her to be 3 and in diapers, but you are leapfrogging from 18 months to 3 all at once, and that is like expecting a crawler to run. Does that make sense? She is pooping on the potty ONLY because it is time for her to poop and you just happen to have her on the potty. You are not actually potty "training" her at all.

So, start learning about the year one through two in a child development book. It will really help you in the long run if you figure out what your child is supposed to be able to do and what she ISN'T supposed to be able to do. It will save you some real heartache later on. I promise you.

Dawn

Your little one is just to young, there is a lot more to it then your dedication to making it happen....and I have done it many, many times.

While the average age for potty training is around 2 years old, some kids can take much longer. It’s not uncommon for some kids to not be ready till they reach the age of 4.

From a mental standpoint, a child's brain needs to be able to receive the message that the bladder is full. Typically this happens between 18-22 months of age, but again, every child is different. Physically, a child needs to be able to dress and undress themselves. They should be able to reach the seat with a stool, though a little help from mom and dad is okay. They also have to be able to recognize the need to go. Developmentally, they need to want to be independent. It’s important that they want to be responsible for themselves.

Your little one needs to meet at the very least most of these...and Independence really is a key component.

18 months is a little young to potty train but she may be ready.
We trained my daughter at 2-1/2 years old. I was off for a week at Christmas and her pre-school had been telling me she was ready for a few months. I delayed cause her little sister was born right after she turned 2.
We used pull ups but to start we had her sit on the potty until she could make potty water in it. We had it set in front of tv so she could watch her favorite show and we had books for her to look at. It did not take long. Once she did it she got her favorite treat - one M&M. For number 2 she got 2 M&Ms. She was potty trained within two days.
Good luck! Not having to buy diapers is like getting a raise! :-)

I'm on day 1 with my 21 month old. So I kinda feel your confusion. What I had hoped to do was cotton training pants (instead of pullups or underwear). 28 pounds seems to be smallest available in stores, so if your daughter is already there, that is the way I would go. My daughter is 21lbs, so we're trying pullups. I don't think there is any reason you can't use any method you want - I've talked to friends to have done all - naked, underwear, pull up and training pants. It's all in how much work and cleaning you are willing to do. With 95% carpet, I wasn't willing to risk naked! lol! Best of luck!

My daughter was older then yours is now. We had two very long trips the year she turned 3, so it was pull ups with the fading symbols. I was able to talk to her and tell her it was now time to be a big girl. I told her about the symbols, how they stayed if she didn't peepee in the pull ups and if she could manage to keep the symbols for full day we would try real big girl panties the next day, like mommy wears. It took a full two weeks, I did put back in the pull ups for the trips, but didn't set her back any. She understood she had to tell us and we would go as fast as we could to the nearest potty.

You are starting young so be prepared for it to take a while. I started later and my older one who started training at 2.5 took over a year to be trained (there was a long break for a new sibling in there). My 3 year old has just about got it now. The thing about starting young is it is frustrating for you. If you get to that point take a break and back off. Battling over this issue is a recipe for problems. I had a family friend who had constipation problems to age 8 or 9 due to potty training battles--it isn't worth that.

I wouldn't push it. My son was trained around 3. The reason for pull-ups for him was so he could practice pulling pants up/down so he could go when he was ready. Then when he had mastered the pants up/down skill, it was time for underwear. If your daughter can't get her clothes on/off without help, then SHE's not really trained, you are ;) Now having her recognize when she has to go and letting you know and getting there in time is awesome. Keep going in that direction and don't stress about it.

I won't say it can't be done. Nor that you shouldn't try. But I will say that I think that "expecting" it to take until age 3 is a mistake.

I am of the belief that many kids could be potty trained earlier than they are. That many times parents miss a small window of opportunity to teach this. These (I think) tend to be the kids who still "aren't ready" at age 3 1/2 or 4, and tend to have issues with bowel movements as well. I don't have any science to base that on--just being honest. But Dana K makes some valid points about the rest of the world, and previous generations of American children.

There seems to have been a very expansive psychological shift in parenting in the past few decades, and rather than leading, parents seem to be more apt to be following their kids around asking them what/how/when they want to do something. That is a lot of pressure for small tots. So I took that pressure off of my kids. LOL

My son was trained sometime prior to 30 months. I don't remember exactly when, but I know he was an "old hand" at using the potty completely on his own during my pregnancy with my daughter (because he accidentally dropped a toilet seat on himself while using it when I was about 7 or 8 months pregnant--this memory is very vivid to me to this day).
My daughter was trained by her 2nd birthday. She wore panties to the store to trade in her pacifiers for toys ON her birthday. She was one proud little girl!

If your daughter is interested, then I would say she has a good chance of success in the next 6 months. If she is not interested at all, you might be in for several more months before she starts to assist in the process. But I don't think you have to wait another year before you do anything.

Just keep it all positive.

My daughter started potty training at 16 months and was fully potty trained by 18 months. My son started at 18 months and it took until he was two to be fully potty trained (I guess boys really do take longer) . We just took it slow. I used panties with plastic covers to avoid having pee all over the house. Used pull-ups if we went on trips. I used a timer. At first I set it for every 45 min to an hour. Everytime the timer went off we would sit on the potty and read a book. If he/she sat he/she got a prize. After a week of that he/she only got a prize if he/she peed or asked to go to the potty before the timer went off. Once he/she was peeing consistantly I started extending the time the timer would go off. After about a month he/she only got a prize if she pooped. It takes a lot of work and attention but it is worth it. Don't give up. Make it fun. I think its easier when they are so young. I had it in the back of my head that he/she was only 16-18 months, so what if they peed themselves or it took longer than three days. It took the pressure off of me and them to get it done, and you get the hard stuff done with before the terrible two's kick in.

ok well you may not want hear it but we started with my daughter that early and she just wasn't ready and infact my pediatrician said it depends on the child and the average kid doesn't get potty trained until 4! My daughter was 2 and a half and she kept TELLING me to change her diaper. I told her if she was old enough to tell me to change it she was old enough to go by herself.. she we started naked for two days. I asked her every ten minutes to remind her more than anything. Then after a cpl hrs I would extend to 20mins.. and there will be accidents. Get really good carpet cleaner! Like what they use for pet urine! Anyways by day two she could do it BUT for the first week I never let her go an hr without asking her if she needed to go. And if she said no I insisted and turned on the facet while she tried! And at night she wears pullups cause she can't always wake herself up yet to go.

I introduced my daughter to the potty at 18 months because she started telling me that she needed a diaper change. I was VERY excited and feeling pretty gung-ho about it. Put shortly and sweetly, she was not ready. She was ready exactly one month before her 3rd birthday. When your daughter can effectively communicate to you when she has to go, then she is ready. Otherwise, you will be putting a pull up on her anytime you want to go anywhere because it just won't click for her until later. If you want HER trained and not just you, wait a little while. Seriously. I learned that with my first. I have brought the potty out and put it into the bathroom and explained it to my son, he will be 2 in October. Thats as far as we have gotten. I have a feeling things will happen for him a little sooner, but I am definitely not trying anything until he is more capable. Good luck to you :)

I know you don't want to hear this, but 18 months is just too young. Not only do babies cognitively not get it at this age, but they can't control the "hold it in" muscles for more than a few seconds at a time, if that. Physiologically, it can't be done.

And, just as importantly, 18 months is an amazing age! It's when they really start to get language, when they start to think in words. It's when they discover the law of gravity. It's the magical age of peek-a-boo, when they just start to grasp that if someone leaves the room, they'll come back. It's the age when they develop their own interests for the first time (my son was all about animals, buses, and trains). It's when a trip to the grocery store is an exotic safari. You don't want to miss all that! Get her on the potty at 2, or even better, 2 1/4. When she's ready, it'll be clear, b/c the whole thing will just take a few days.

Awesome article on webmd:
http://www.webmd.com/parenting/tc/toilet-training-topic-o...

It makes alot of sense. The child not only has to be physically ready but emotionally ready, too. The average age for boys to be completed is around 3 and a couple months earlier for girls. Every child is different but mine took quite a long time to be trained for the night time. I think he was 4 or 5. I was a stay at home mom, too and there was no need to stress. When his little body was ready he told me. He said his pull-up was too hot and he did very well that night. And he was trained.