Potty Training Advice Needed

The FIRST time we went thru this I THINK we started TOO EARLY - it was so stressful and I don't usually complain about stress...

The second time, I had learned from the first time and we didn't push as much...

the THIRD (AND LAST- lol) time we just went with the flow and it was SO EASY!!!!! Those kids aren't going to be in diapers til they are married! LOL You'll know when they are ready.

Good Luck ---

I just heard on a morning show that you can have diaper free kids - but that is A LOT of WORK on the parent's part - it is actually training the parents not the child - and children NEED to know what it is all about before they can WANT TO go like a BIG KID --- let them see what you do and talk to them about every step of their life - especially this one - "I'm a big girl, I don't need diapers and I am clean and dry all the time - I have more time to play" or any other things like that that you can think of.

Have a great day everyone!

Hello! It's never too early to introduce the potty; however, if she's not ready, then don't have high expectations. Just an opinion, but ditch the little potty chair, and use a potty ring on the big potty! If you use the little chair, then later she'll have to get used to going on the 'big potty' which makes for yet another transition (not to mention, when you're out in public, they dont' have little potty chairs ;0) AND you wont' have to deal with the mess of cleaning out the chair each time. She'll probably enjoy flushing the big potty whenever she goes in it -- that makes for a fun reward when flushing is kept only for when the child actually pees/poos in it.
Some encouragement: My daughter sat on the big potty for the first time at 10 months, and I left her on there til she peed -- which also encouraged her big 2 yr old brother to want to go more ;0) Now she's almost 11 months and I usually sit her on there 1-2 times a day, and she often goes (but of course I have no expectations; I'm just getting her used to the idea.)
Wish you the best!

Some of the best advice my pediatrician has ever given me was about potty training. She told me to wait until they were ready, they prompted it or around the age of three. I got lots of flack from the older generatioins that my son was not potty trained at the age of two. However, at my son's three year check up, which was a day or two after his birthday my peditrician told him no more pull ups or diapers. She told him he was three and needed to go on the potty. And that was it! He refused to wear a diaper or pull up and never looked back. He litterally was potty trained over night. I never had to deal with him wetting the bed or pooing in his pants. With my daughter, she just one day at about 2.5 years old decided she wouldn't wear a diaper/pull up anymore and wanted "Big Girl Panties". That was it with her too, trained over night.

I am not sure what "Harm" you will do to your child, but the harm to youself could be months and months of frustration, extra laundry, etc. I see no harm in introducing the potty to her, I did the same with my kiddos at about the same age, then I let them lead the way. Good Luck, whatever you decide is right for you and your little pumpkin!

Hi M.!

My daughter is just over 2 and is fully trained, she even goes without being told or asked. When we first started, we showed her the chair and just let her get used to seeing it in the bathroom and let her get used to sitting on it. Once she started to want to sit on it more we started taking off her diaper and taking her with me and my 7 year old would also take her, it was easy from there. Once she started going on it without diapers and such we made her a star chart. I used a blank calendar I printed off the net and every time she went potty like a big girl she got to put a star on the chart! Well, I hope some of what I said can help you and your daughter. Good luck with the potty training!

Set the potty out, show her, let her watch you use the potty as often as possible, discuss what she has done in her diaper when your changing it and let her take it from there. Just remember it's impossible to make a child pee on a potty and don't stress about it. She will potty train when she is ready :) 19 months is a little on the early side in many cases, but an introduction will never hurt. If she freaks out, put it away, try again in a few months. Or just stick it in the corner and see what she does with it.

Yes, go for it! Don't wait - start slow and easy, work as a team, stay relaxed, treat it as a fun learning process, and understand that accidents are a normal and helpful part of this process. If you still have reservations, here are 2 things that you might find encouraging:

1) All around the world, babies are pottied early in the first year, many from birth or 3 months onward. It is done with NO pressure, no coersion, only gently and lovingly. These babies are typically potty trained between 12-18 months (meaning, they tell the caregiver they need to go, though they might need help w/ clothing or wiping). These babies are no different than our own! The big difference? We use diapers from birth, and this teaches the baby to disregard their elimination signals as we essentially teach/train them to go in their diapers at random. Here in the US, where diapers are the norma, we don't encourage conscious release of the sphincter muscle for those first 18-30 months of life (whenever we decide to start potty training our toddlers) so our babies' muscle tone is lower after several years of being diapered full time. Just understand that you're coming from that perspective (full time diapering) and know that you'll be helping your daughter get back in touch with her elimination signs ("Honey, you're dancing around which means you probably have to pee!" OR "Look, sweetie, you're peeing - that's the pee running down your leg. Let's go read a book on the potty, get you dry and comfy again, and next time you feel like pee is coming, tell mommy and we'll see if we can get it in the potty."

2) The longer you wait, the more you're teaching your daughter to eliminate in her diaper, and the higher the likelihood that she'll resist when you try to switch her from diapers to potty. Just hang out in potty training forums all over the web, and you'll read account after account of toddlers and PRESCHOOLERS who know when they have to go, but they simply don't want to do it on the potty and they ask for a diaper in which to poop (that's not at all empowering for a child!). These kids are well trained --> DIAPER-trained. However, you can hopefully avoid this by starting now with your daughter. Best for learning is to put her in simple, cotton, non-waterproof training pants (put 2 on at a time if you're concerned about puddles on the floor). Be prepared to temporarily do a bit more laundry, and you 2 can again do that joyfully as a TEAM. Understand that the accidents HELP HER connect the sensation of having to pee with the result of pee coming out -- that way, she can start to predict when she has to go and work on the timing of getting to the toilet in time. Diaper-free time is also a really good thing when at home, just be together in a room where an accident wouldn't be the end of the world (a non-carpeted area, for example) and keep a little plastic potty chair nearby.

And last, GOOD FOR YOU for thinking about potty training now. I see so many parents who are reluctant to help their toddlers learn to use the potty - they have this idea that if they just wait around long enough, their 2 or 3 or 4 year old child will suddenly tell them "mom, I'm ready!" And while that might happen in some rare cases, the vast majority of kids do NOT potty train themselves. Heck, they've been taught that the diaper is the place to go, and they continue to go *in the diaper* (and continue to have weak sphincters from lack of conscious use, making potty training trickier!). Honestly, it lots of these cases, the child is more than ready - it's the parents who aren't ready to partner up and do the potty training (not willing for there to be any accidents, to do extra laundry, to be inconvenienced about making trips to the bathroom while out and about, these are just a few reasons fellow moms have shared with me!). So, if you're interested in starting the potty learning process and can commit to remaining RELAXED, supportive, joyful about the process, and creative in when/where/how she uses the potty (some like to take the little potty on the patio for change of scenery, others like to read on the potty, or play with an interesting toy, etc.), you should both have a really fun, enjoyable learning experience. It could last days, weeks, or a few months, and that's fine. Wouldn't it be nicer to be out of diapers and have an occasional accident (1x week or 1x month) than be full time in diapers??

A few books that you might like, if you want more info on potty training and like to read:

Early Start Potty Training by Linda Sonna
http://www.drsonna.org/ptresources.htm

Diaper-Free by Ingrid Bauer
http://www.natural-wisdom.com/

Diaper-Free Before 3 by Dr. Jill Lekovic
www.diaperfreebefore3.com/

...happy pottying!

With being so busy, I would wait for some signs. Also, go to pampers.com and they offer a free little book with some ideas. My dd is 22 months and will not leave the diaper on. We are going to start potty training. She also takes off her diaper and squats and goes so there are some signs.

I don't think 19 months is too early, but I actually did infant potty training with all three of my kids. Still, I have friends who have potty trained kids before the age of 2. I would keep her diaper off as much as possible. It helps if you have wood floors. Keep several potties around also and take her to the potty frequently.

At around 18 months my daughter Julia began to show signs and actually did awesome until a few months later (just when I thought "she's got it!"... she absolutely refused to do anything. For at least 6 months! I was SO frustrated!!! Her doctor said that it was totally normal and she might not train until she reached 3-4 or later!!!! "NO WAY!" I thought!

I guess what I am trying to say is... make it fun for both of you and don't expect ANYTHING!

she is too young. there is nothing wrong with buying a chair and sitting in the bathroom and telling her what it is. it will do more harm pushing her early than just waiting. she will show you when she is ready. and if you train her now you are only training your self to say do you have to go every two hours. i have a four year old and and 18 month. my niece was almost 3 and half and my nephew is 3 and he goes sometimes. my four yead old is deaf so he is behind and he has started showing some signs and does every once in a while.

M. s

I've heard that the earlier you start - the later they actually will accept it. i'm going to wait until 2 1/2 unless he seriously gives me signs sooner than that.

C.

Hey im kinda going through the same thing! I introduced her potty to her a long while ago. She loves to sit on it. She says potty! She's starting to be able to tell us when she thinks she has to go, of course she's nt always right but at least she's getting the point. You should just let her know what it is. After a little while, when you go potty take her with you and just let her sit on it, with dipear. Slowly start taking the dipear off just so she knows! You might get lucky and she might go once in a while. Thats what mine did, but then she stoped! She still wants to sit on the potty though. Im hoping by the time she's 2 she will be going potty! It really cant hurt to just introduce the potty to your daughter. Just watch how she reacts to the potty. Good luck!!!!

Hi M.,

Kudos to you on the single mom, working and going to school thing. I don't know how you do it. I will pray for you and your little girl.

I am a mother of 4 children ranging from 27 years old to 2 years old and a grandmother of 3 with one on the way.

My little 24 month old baby girl is just now "starting" to show interest in the potty so don't be in too much of a hurry. She will go when she is ready I promice.

A great book on children is Supernanny books (I have 3) by Jo Frost. You may have seen her on TV. She gives the GREATEST advice. I absolutely love her!

I am trying to get mine to sleep in her own bed all night :) I know she will in time.

So enjoy her childhood it is over way too soon.
Good Luck,
N.

First, I think you should limit her fluid intake. That is the way you see longer periods of dry time. Personally, I do not believe in pull ups. They are exactly like a diaper and they can't tell when they are wet and neither can you. They have to experience the entire soaked outfit to apprectiate and get the potty training process. 19 months is young, but that's great that your thinking about it! When I introduced my oldest daughter to the potty chair, she wore a dress with nothing on underneath and she wanted to sit on that thing all day long! I think she was about 23 months. My youngest was potty trained before 2, but she has two older sisters to show her the way and she was showing the ready signs. Bottom line: When you set your mind to seriously potty training her and putting all other things on the back burner and devote all your time and energy to training her, then it will happen.