Potty Training - Warren, MI

Updated on March 21, 2008
S.C. asks from Troy, MI
25 answers

I am trying to potty train my 28 month old son. The first day he did really good. he went on the potty 7 times but also went in his pull-up 5-7 times. this is day two and we have started using regular training pants to see if that will help him. he hasn't gone on the potty not once but in his pants 3 times. should I keep going or wait a couple of weeks and try again? can anyone give me REAL honest advice?? thanks, S.

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So What Happened?

Well, we are going to push on bc he has gone potty several times and last night he poo-poo in the potty without me being in the bathroom ( I put him on the potty and walked out for a few min)when I came back he said I POOPED IN THE POTTY which a lot of times that means pee, but not this time. Thanks for all of your advice. I do have one more question about the morning. Should I take him right when he gets up or should I give him his drink/milk first then wait a few? thanks I JUST WANT ALL THE MOMS OUT THERE TO KNOW THAT ITS NOT A FORCEFUL THING. HE LIKES GOING POTTY HE JUST DOESNT KNOW WHEN HE NEEDS TO GO!! BUT WHEN I TAKE HIM AND HE DOES GO HE IS VERY,VERY PROUD THAT HE DID IT. WE DO STICKERS AND 2 PIECES OF HIS FAV SNACK.

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M.C.

answers from Detroit on

#1 Throw out the pullups and switch to just undies and pants even at night.
#2 Take him to the potty every 1/2 hr whether he goes or not
#3 NEVER put a diaper on him again for any reason
#4 It will take patience and the first couple of days he will mess probably 6 or so times a day but it will get better every day and be prepared to do laundry and have at least 10 pairs of undies and pants to start.

I did this at 24 months with my son and he was down to 1 accident a day after 2 weeks and no night time messes and after 2 months there were no accidents.

Best of luck

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B.Z.

answers from Detroit on

i found "potty free before three" to be helpful. try to be patient. i'm in the midst of it as well. :) I started my son in october and we're still not there yet! but just yesteray he decided he wanted to start wearing underwear. we went through at least 4 pairs of pants, but at least he's wearing it (b/f he did NOT want to.) from what i hear, boys take longer...basically, the thing that has helped the most is making it a part of his routine. he goes 1st thing in the a.m., b/f nap, after nap, b/f bed. try starting w/that just to acclimate him to the whole thing. hope that helps! and don't worry, he won't be in diapers forever! :)

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T.C.

answers from Detroit on

Hi S.,

My son is 2 1/2 and we just did potty training a few weeks ago...successfully, I might add. I had the same problem at first also. He would go in his pants if he had them on so someone suggested that I try taking his pants off and see what happens. We started out by turning the heat up in the house and taking his pants completely off. He had an accident on the floor the first time and was distraught about it and helped me clean it up. After the first day he was going regularly on the potty at home. After a few days I tried putting training pants on him again and he peed in them. So my next step was to put pants on him with no underwear and it worked. So a few days later I started putting him in underwear and he is doing great. About a week and a half after we started he actually told me he had to go while we were grocery shopping and he went in the big potty at the store. He is now doing great and we have very few accidents...mostly when he is engrossed in something and doesn't take the time to go. Also...during potty training, I made him a sticker chart that we hung right on the bathroom wall and he gets 1 sticker for peeing and 2 for pooping. We have several sheets of different stickers for him to pick from. He gets a kick out of showing everyone how many stickers are on his chart. We also told him that when his sticker chart is full we get to go to the store and pick out a new video. Hang in there....it will happen. I think staying home with him for the most part over a two week period really worked.

Good luck!!

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S.H.

answers from Tampa on

Like everyone else says, 3 is the magic #. Hang in there! It will happen soon enough. Use the next couple months to just talk about the potty with him. Also, start changing his pants in the bathroom and take your time. If you can put the poo in the toilet and flush it he will be more intrigued. Taking your time will frustrate him too. Tell him that it will be much faster when he decides to go in the potty and he will get back to playing quick. Sometimes he will want to go try and other times he will act like you are crazy for suggesting it. Soon he will want to be like other big boys and daddy. When that clicks in his little mind, potty training will be a breeze. Stay positive and encouraging...Never make him feel bad for not doing it.
God bless!

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J.A.

answers from Detroit on

S.,
Boys often take longer than girls do, so let it slide for a while. I would suggest that you give him an incentive. When my son trained, it was because he knew he could not go for a ride on Grandpa's motorcycle unless he was potty trained. He was almost three, but this is not unusual for boys. There are some good books on the subject, so see what's out there and go with this advice. Try little incentives like an M&M for every time he makes pee-pee. Don't belittle him for making a mistake, just help him get cleaned up and say "better luck next time". He'll catch on before long. If you are trying to get him trained before the new baby comes, forget about that one! The baby will get more attention and the baby will wear a diaper, so he will likely have a setback when this occurs.
He is an individual and has different needs, so just go with the flow. Sorry for the pun!
J.

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L.S.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I agree with Nicole. I didn't train my son until he was three. But the week after he turned three, I just picked a date and that was it - no more diapers!

I cleared the calendar for the week and that's all we focused on. I let him run around naked from the waist down because he hated pooping without the diaper and didn't yet know how to pee standing up.

I used a sticker chart - little stickers for peeing, big stickers for poopies.

And, I kept a stockpile of little gifts around for when he tried really hard and succeeded. (Luckily, his birthday was just the week prior, so we just doled out his gifts! Sneaky, I know, but totally effective!)

Between all the praise, sticker and reward toys, we had him completely trained in a week. At the end of it all, he got one big Thomas train track which had been sitting up on the mantle all week to serve as a constant incentive.

So those are a couple of hints to keep in mind. They may or may not work on your son. Remember, though, once they're ready, it's not so hard. If it's hard, he might not be ready.

Good Luck!

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D.V.

answers from Grand Rapids on

Please wait a few weeks, my oldest son was a ease to potty train but my youngest would be interested for about a week then loose interest and their doctor suggested we wait until he's interested again, it took about 4 tries before he decided he didn't want diapers on again.
Good luck,
D.

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C.M.

answers from Detroit on

I read the "what happened" part...sounds like you are having great success. Good going!

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N.W.

answers from Detroit on

Honestly...I would wait. Boys are harder to train and aren't ready as soon. My son was 3 before he got the pee thing down and 3 1/2 before we got the poop thing down. They don't even really have control until between 18 and 24 months. It is really frustrating for everyone to have that many accidents. I would keep encouraging him to use the potty, i.e. in the am, before nap, before bed, etc. any in a few months try again.

Good luck...

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V.G.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I hate to say it, but he may be to young. Our oldest daughter wasn't fully potty trained until just before her 3rd birthday - we received some critism about this, but didn't feel she was ready. Our youngest we've been trying to potty train since she turned 2, but it's been off and on as she hasn't been interested in the concept. Mid-January she really started taking an interest and loved wearing the training pants. At that point we started serious potty training. We've had our ups and downs with the training pants (we've never used pull-ups) but are almost there. She'll turn 3 the end of April. Each child is different, but I've discovered that 3 is okay. I've had cousins just starting to potty train at 3 1/2, and know that my oldest daughters pre-school class has some kids still in pull-ups. I think that might be pushing it (they're 4 and 5 yr olds), but think that you have plenty of time. Wait a couple weeks and try again, if he still has equal to, or more, accidents than successes, then put it off a couple weeks and try again. Eventually he'll get the idea.

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S.S.

answers from Detroit on

A good idea that worked for us was to do practice runs (like 3 - 5 times) each time there was an accident. When there is an accident go through the proper way to do it. This is kind of like a role-play of the entire event - from the moment he has to go to washing his hands. We would go out to the living room and say together(or have him say "mommy, I have to go potty" (or whatever it is you want him to tell you when he needs to go, go to the bathroom and put him on the potty (you are not leaving him there, just practicing the proper way)talk him through everything you do and then finish by washing his hands. Let him go out to the living room/play room/ wherever for a minute(literally) and say "It's time to practice, what do you say when you have to go potty? - and start the whole thing over again. do this a few times each time there is an accident (I think that the one-day trainers say to do it 10 times - I found that a little much and did 3 - 5 times) This, in addition to taking him to actually try every hour or so really helped us to get this down within a few days. We found a couple days that took alot of my time was way better than weeks of accidents:) If he really doesn't seem to get it, it is possible that it is too early. We also used prizes and such each time he did actually go.

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G.B.

answers from Detroit on

28 months is VERY young to potty train, especially in a boy! Sure, he can do it sometimes and you will hear stories of children trained by this age or much younger, but the norm is sometime between 3 & 4 especially for boys. You can make the battle much longer and stronger by forcing this issue. Smart children especially seem to like to use this as a battleground - and a lot of 2 yr olds love to get your goat! My doctor daughter was nearly 4 but then it was for good! On someone else's advice, I started her before a year! That was just nuts but I didn't know! A grandson made several false starts and suddenly trained a few months before his 4th birthday. He did it all on his own at that point and felt really good about it and there's been no backsliding. Of course, all young children will have the occasional accident and I'd try not to make a big deal out of that. Carry some extra things in the car for a few months just in case. 2 yr olds like to show how grown up they are but can't do it every day yet. Relax, Mom! G. B.

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M.A.

answers from Detroit on

When potty training both of my children, one boy and one girl, I used the same technique with both of them. I am not saying they both potty trained the same because they were very different and did it at different ages. I am an out door person. I waited for the summer and Everytime I went outside my kids had on normal underware. We would be outside right after breakfast and stayed out all day and we did this everyday. That way if they had an accident I could tell them why it wasn't ok. Plus it gave them the chance to feel what happens to their pants when they pee in them. It was easier for me to teach them this leason outside because I didn't have to clean a puddle off my kitchen floor. However, any time we were inside they still had their underware on (except nap and bed times). After feeling the wet clothes on them a few times they started to learn what it felt like to get the urge to go potty. They began to understand if I do this I am going to be wet and kids don't like that feeling. That is why they walk funny after they wet in their pants, it just isn't comfortable. I let them pick out the character underware of their choice and I told my son that superman would not be happy if he went pee-pee on him. I made it into a little game. I would say things like "Yuck, you just pee-peed on spiderman now he isn't happy because he is all wet." I NEVER used pull ups. Pull ups are nothing but a diaper that a child can stand up to put on. In my opinion a child will not learn to be potty trained if they can not feel the wetness on them. Potty training did not happen over night. As a matter of fact I think it took two or three weeks for both of my kids. When I say two or three weeks that doesn't mean they have never had an accident. That does not include night time either. Night potty training takes a lot longer. All I did with night time is continue using diapers until they started going at least ten nights without wetting in their diapers. Once they did that I put them to bed in normal underware and only had a few night time accidents after that. I had to have many patients and never got angry when they did have an accident. If you get angry they will be affraid. That advice is coming not only from me as a parent but also as a long time preschool teacher. You can not go back and forth from underware to diapers either (except for nap time or bed time). Once you make the commetment you need to do it faithfully. You send mixed signals when you have underware on at home and than go to the store and put the child back into a diaper. That tells the child it is ok to wet their pants when you are out doing errands. If you switch back and forth it will take longer and be harder to potty train them. One other challenge I had was potty chair vs. grown-up potty. My son used the big potty from the very get go. I had one of those seats that went on the toilet so he wouldn't fall in. I loved it, it was so easy. My daughter was affraid of the big toilet. It took awhile for her to sit on it, so she did her potty training on a little potty chair. I hope I gave you some advice and ideas that may work for you. Obviously every child is different so you have to do what works for you, your son, and your family. Just remember, be consistant and don't give up. He is not too young to be potty trained. Both of mine were trained by two years old. Good Luck!!!

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L.C.

answers from Lansing on

i just went through this with my son! It was like wearing a pull up gave him permission to pee in it, a glorified diaper. One saturday we were home with nothing going on and I just let him run around bare naked. It really helped him realize the feeling of needing to go, every time! Congrats on your success already and keep the faith lol

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C.M.

answers from Detroit on

Hi S.,

I honestly believe that they will do it when they are ready. I definitely think you should keep the option of using the toilet open but don't force the issue. I tried potty trining Delaney when she was two. She was interested in the potty, but just couldn't tell when she had to go. We tried a few monthes later and she still just could not tell. Finally, a few months before her third birthday we went to the dollar store and stocked up on potty prizes. (She started waking up dry in the mornings!) Everytime she went potty she earned a sticker. When she had two stickers she got to pick a prize. She was potty trained within a few days. She could tell when she had to go and did not like feeing wet anymore. She did not care about the prizes and just went when she had to. I hope this helped! My biggest piece of advice, don't let it frustrate you......I would joke that mydaughter would go to her prom in her pull-ups.

C.

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P.S.

answers from Detroit on

I have 2 sons and my advice is to wait and let them do it when they are ready. It may happen late (mine did it at 3 and 3 1/2 yrs) but it is sooooo much less stressful. My youngest had absolutely no interest in the potty then one day while we were at my older son's hockey game he made me take him to the bathroom at least 4 times to pee! I missed half the game but when we got home that night he pooped on the potty and he has had VERY few accidents since, including nighttime. It couldn't have been any easier once I relaxed and let him do it when he was ready. Like everyone always told me - no kid goes to kindergarten in a diaper!
P.

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M.V.

answers from Grand Rapids on

We chose not to sweat it or push the potty thing. And our daughter was SLOW so it was a little frustrating. She was almost 4 before completely trained. She loved the video "Potty Power" from the library. And eventually, she got to put stickers on a chart every time she had a success. When the chart was full we said Okay, now also do poops. That finally clicked for her, too. And she was VERY excited to HAVE POTTY POWER! We just kept hearing from other Moms--don't worry, it will happen when it happens!

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T.V.

answers from Saginaw on

S.,

My daughter S., gives my grandson stickers.

Don't be discouraged since boys are usually harder to train than girls and he's only 28 months old. Just keep on encouraging him and praise him when he does a good job, and don't scold when he does go in his pull up.

T. V

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S.L.

answers from Detroit on

S.,

Keep up the good work! Potty training takes time. Be consistent, don't stop until you've acheived your goal. It will take more than 2 days. It could take 2 mos. or more!! It all depends on your child. Praise and encourage your child each time he trys or succeeds.
Sesame Street has a delightful viedo called Elmo's Potty Time which might be helpful to you both. The video comes with a Training Guide.
Patience and a good positive attitude is important during this time.
Much success to you on this endeavor.

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H.M.

answers from Detroit on

If you are on day 2, take a deep breath and recognize that it is only day 2....potty training can take months or longer. Be patient. PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE and never punish when there are accidents - and there will be accidents - A LOT of them. Boys take longer than girls to potty train, and have less bladder control (they can't hold it like girls can). Every child is different and will potty train on a different schedule based on individual needs, body functioning, etc. There are a lot of really good books on the subject, and some that aren't so good. Don't push...encourage and understand that it will probably take a long time. Remember also, that even after fully potty trained, children have accidents and regress to needing pull-ups at different stages (i.e., changes in environmental or lifestyle, stress, starting school, molars coming in, etc.) - always be understanding and use the pull-ups to save you child from embarrassing situations, as well as keeping bedding and clothing clean, and travel and long-stays away form home easy and comfortable. Good luck!

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J.N.

answers from Lansing on

When my boys were little family pressure lead me to believe that they needed to be potty trained early, so I made my first little guy stutter because I put him under so much pressure. With my second son, I waited for him to tell me when he was ready and he did, a month before his 3rd birthday. I'd recommend not pushing it, they will let you know when they are ready. Rest assured they won't go to school in diapers. J.

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B.M.

answers from Lansing on

Dear S., I'm offering this idea which worked perfectly with our son at about the same age as yours. Your attitude needs to remain positive and very patient, with the total belief that your child is truly making the decision to become a "big boy" and you are not going to be the Director/Dictator of his life in this regard. This is all we did: We bought him attractive big boy pants which he was thinking that he might like to wear. Each time I changed him I asked him if he wanted big boy pants or a diaper. He decided. I did whatever he said, without making any big deal about it, and without any cheerleading or bribing. (the message of our attitude and action was "whatever you do is fine, and it is up to you") If he wet his pants I didn't chastise him at all. All I did was continue to ask in a very loving and positive way, "big boy pants or diaper?" and then do what he said. Interestingly he began by going all night in big boy pants. Then he started to choose them during the day, at times. He trained easily and rather quickly---probably in about 3 or 4 weeks from beginning to end. No tears, no threats, no prizes. Just peace and ease.

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C.S.

answers from Detroit on

My honest opinion is that it's too soon and you'll have a much easier time when he's older. It's good that he enjoys trying the potty, but to force it right now when he's not ready could make it negative in the long run. It became a huge struggle with my daughter and she wasn't completely trained until almost 3 and a half. I think I started too soon, and tried too many techniques. However, I know it's different for everyone, but I also know there's a LOT of pressure to get it done as soon as possible. My daughter was the last one of her friends to be potty trained, but let me tell you -- she has the least accidents now, esp after I took the pressure off. My nephew will be 3 in May and my sister has taken the relaxed route and he LOVES using the potty, but is not yet completely trained. He initiates it on his own a lot and enjoys the praise. Good luck! Just remember, you'll get through potty training eventually even if it seems like it's taking forever! It can be a long process.

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A.F.

answers from Detroit on

S.,

I have 3 children ages 7, 10, and 13. I was never able to potty train them successfully until almost 3 years old. My concern was always whether or not they would be able to get into preschool but somehow it just clicked just in time and they were fine. The first one took the longest, then the second. By the third one, she all but potty trained herself. I think when they have siblings to watch and encourage them, it goes much more easily. One thing I definately learned was not to let it be a battle. It can be very discouraging when you are trying so hard and they just aren't cooperating so it seems. It's really not that. I think they just aren't ready. When they truly are they just do it.

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M.H.

answers from Saginaw on

Hi S., I'm a mom of 4, 3 of which are boys. Have you talked to your doctor about this? My docs told me that boys are not able to control the sphinter muscle that controls urination until they are three. That your 2 yr old is trying and doing so good is a blessing for you. My advice, would be stop trying so hard with him. All this will come in its own good time. Two of my boys were 3 1/2 before they were trained and one was ready before he was 3. When your son stays dry though the night and shows his own interest in being trained, then work hard on it. Until then enjoy his life as it is.

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