Potty Training - Fort Lauderdale,FL

All kids are different. My friends daughter did this when she was 3. Eventually she went back to pull ups and 3 months later I said (I was watching her at the time) "Ok this is what we are going to do..." she was physically and emotionally ready at that time I think because within two weeks she was fully trained. If you need to go back to pull ups go back to pulls up.....he will be ok! And you won't stress out about the hiding and pooping in the underpants.

I'm a step mom to a 3-year old boy, and I went through the same thing... the hiding, etc. I got soooo angry one day because I knew he had to go, but he just wouldn't do it on the toilet. He was wearing pull-ups, though.

Here's my advice: Don't force it. Put him in pull-ups instead of regular undies. Treat it like a neat step up and get him to be excited about it. Go pick out the pull-ups together. Don't keep the undies on and keep getting yourself upset. It takes a lot of patience, but trust me, it eventually does happen! Pooping is the last thing to happen, but once it does, you'll be happy and also laughing about how much you're sharing the pooping-on-the-toilet experience with him!

So don't force it, and definitely do NOT make him feel ashamed about it. Don't make a big deal about soiled clothes either. He is already a little stressed, and that will make it worse. Talk to him and tell him how proud of him you are and that you are very excited to work together to make these next steps in being a big boy.

A side idea... maybe you can do like little 'treats' or something to encourage him. I didn't do this, but my stepson's mom did this with those little shaped bands (silly bandz?). But the idea is to pick something that you treat him to ONLY when he does the potty thing (otherwise it loses its specialness).

http://parentingtouchstones.com/01/10-techniques-to-toile...

Alot of boys just are not ready until four years of age.

Try, instead of washing the soiled underwear, throw it out. Say, ohhh this is too dirty to clean. Have him put them in a bag and throw away.

I just wanted to offer some encouragement... I went through this with both of my daughters where they were totally trained except they'd poop in their panties EVERY DAY. It was very frustrating. My older daughter did this for a few weeks, then one day pooped in the potty and that was it; she was trained (at about 2 1/2). My younger daughter did it for a month. I finally was able to convince her to ask me for a diaper when she needed to poop, which she was very happy to do, and then after a few days of that whenever she'd ask for the diaper, we'd go to the potty, too. Finally we were able to get to the potty and she, too, hasn't looked back. But it took her until 3 to be trained. So I think this is a normal phase and kids just reach it at different times. Never fear, he will poop in the potty when he is ready!

You started your little guy awfully young if he's already been training for a few months. I's suggest backing off and letting him go back to diapers for awhile. He WILL want to train when he's truly ready, at least if he hasn't become discouraged by failing you too many times, or resistant to too much pressure. And little boys are more often on the later end of the age spectrum before they have all the necessary physical and emotional pieces in order. He'd be right in the middle of 'normal' if he didn't show interest until age 3 or older.

Here's a wonderful, informative website you might find helpful. It gives a few variations on"readiness" checklists, plus tips on various training strategies, the best ages to start them, and the advantages and disadvantages of each approach: http://www.parentingscience.com/toilet-training-readiness...

Does he poop at the same time every day? If so, take him to the bathroom then. Telling you that they have to go is a late step in the training process. You can also try letting him know that he can poop in a diaper, but only if he does it while sitting on the potty or toilet (he can choose whether he wears pants over the diaper or not). Once he's used to it, you can graduate him to doing it without wearing a diaper

Yeah i got fustrated too and yell as well before we I calmed down and had a few relaxed talks with my oldest.I finally got my oldest to tell me it hurt her when she pooped.
I had give her some empathy and tell her it was becuase she needed to drink more juice. Remind her she is just like me and i know how she feels. So i gave her oj everyday, til i could get her to drink apple juice.

Also, if she really pooped inher big kid underwear it was going in to the trash. A little smudge was an accident and i could get it out. Well that put the finally touch on it. No way was she gonna let her favorite mermaid underwear go in the trash anymore.

That's normal.
Pooping... in a toilet, is often the last 'phase' of learning toileting.
Normal.

And yes, they hide.
They are self-conscious and because they know their parents do not want them to poop, except for in a toilet. But they are not yet, there yet. Not ready.

He is normal.

It can take a LONG time.
Potty mastery, takes time.
It is in increments.

Night time dryness, is also something that is entirely separate. Night time dryness or nap time dryness, does not occur, BIOLOGICALLY until even 7 years old. And this is normal. It is the physiological development of the body/brain/nerve connections. Not a child's age.

My daughter, when that age, developed constipation. And we then had to take her to a Specialist- a Pediatric Gastroenterologist. Because, she was then HOLDING in her poop on purpose. Hence, getting pain and not popping. This is called "withholding." We did not pressure her about it or about pottying... but she merely got stress and anxiety about pooping. The idea of it.
And, Once a child withholds their poop and gets constipated, it can take MONTHS for their bowels and poop, to normalize. And for them to get over the emotional aspect of it, and the biological aspect of it.
The Specialist said: to just let the child poop in a diaper. Once they are ready, they will get to that mastery of it. But, if they are like this, they are NOT ready.
You cannot make them ready.
It is an emotion and biological based.... occurrence.

I just started training my son, he's doing great with #1 but withholding #2. A friend just shared an idea with me that a couple people we know used that worked...could be worth a try for you since you said he goes into hiding. In a corner of the house they set up a tent with a small potty inside:-). then they ultimately moved it to the bathroom. May be worth a try!:-)

It can get frustrating, so take a deep breath, and keep trying ;-)
What you can do is keep track of WHEN he poops. Is it right after he eats, half an hour later? Then sit him on the potty at those times. Ask him to stay until he poops. And lots or cheering when he does. No candy rewards though.
Good luck