Potty Training - Fort Worth,TX

M.,

I feel for you. I really do. I'm going through almost the same situation. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.

I would just let it go and continue with pull ups it can become a major power struggle if you are not careful... wait a little while then try again!

HTH
A. J

Just to let you know that my children did not want to use the potty. they used the toilet instead. I just bought the stepping stool and the seat.
you might want to try that. Also make her go and make a big deal for going in the toilet.

I too had a very stubborn 3 1/2 year old girl with no interest in the potty. If you haven't done this already, what worked for us was to make it all about getting to wear special panties. I'd buy your daughter a set of panties with her favorite princesses or character on them. Talk them up and tell her she can wear them when she starts using the potty. Then don't mention the potty or ask her to sit on it at all. Give her the control. One day my daughter just announced she was ready to wear her panties and that was it. Good luck!

I am really starting to think this is a common phase for girls to go thru. I have read many post from Moms with toddler girls that have had the same situation. I myself have a 5 yr old girl. For the longest time we could not get her to go Poopy in the Potty. She would go tee-tee but not poopy. This was especially true if she was doing an activity that she enjoyed. She would not stop what she was doing to go to the potty for poopy.

What worked for us? I have a digital timer. I would set the timer for intervals of 15 to 20 mins. Every time the timer would go off we would stop what we are doing and both go to the potty. Even if she didn't have to go she had to sit on the potty. Many times she ended up having to go.If she goes poopy in her panties, SHE is the one that has to clean the panties NOT Momma. Be prepared, they will not be as clean as if YOU had cleaned them, but it gets the point across. We started training at 2 1/2 and now she is 5. She still has accidents on occasion, but now they are truly ACCIDENTS and not from her just NOT going to the potty.

D.
SAHM mom of three: 19,18,and 5
Home Baker and Crafter. Married to the same wonderful man for
almost 12 years.

There are so many philosophies on potty training and you could easily (& may have already) get very frustrated and stressed over it. Remember that children pick up on those emotions. Every kid, just like all us adults, has a need for CONTROL. Our pediatrician told us that we cannot control what goes in or comes out of our daughter - good advice.

I think the Love & Logic folks have good advice on this as they do on most things. Try not to stress over it or push your kid. The preschool idea is a good one for benchmarking. Your kid may decide she wants to use the potty so she can be like others who are doing it.

Also, when she shows any interest, get her some big girl panties - there are some great training pants available. We found ours online. Disposable training pants - Pull-ups, etc. still absorb really well and won't make her uncomfortable.

Good luck! Hang in there. As the Love & Logic folks say: "Most kids get this by age 21 - Don't worry."

When my daughter was 3 and a half she thought it was fun to pretend to use the potty, but that was it. No real interest. We put her in a two day a week preschool and she was potty trained within a few months. We went to Tumble Bugs in Mckinney. They were very cooperative. She'll get it eventually no matter what you do. Just don't put too much pressure on her. I've seen so many kids have horrible side effects from there parents forcing them. You don't want to deal with her holding her stools later!

just so you know you're not alone, my 3yr daughter also prefers to soil herself. it feels like we've failed as mothers with trying to teach our children the most basic acomplishments of "going potty" but I've talked with our pediatrition and the Dr. says not to stress over it. potty training occurs anywhere between 2-4 (FoUR ) years of age.

i've thought that my daughter just needs more peer pressure instead of running with her little 2yr brother. If he's alright to stink up a diaper, she thinks the same about herself.
its frustrateing when all day, you strip them of pee soaked clothes but maybe someday, she's going to get it.

good luck to you . wish i had more advice

My son was also 3.5 yrs old and had no interest in potty training. Or so I thought! I finally just set MY mind to get it done. The most important thing is take her to the potty EVERY thirty min. or so and make her sit on the potty for AT LEAST 5 min. While in there praise her for trying. Sit on the toilet yourself while she is on the potty and show her you are going. And NEVER get mad that she doesn't go. Say "thats okay. Maybe next time." She will make the connection and finally go. It took till the end of the second day for my son to go. We had very few accidents and he has been completely toilet trained for a couple of months. I did offer small rewARDS for when he did go in the potty,like stickers,and did the crazy potty dance when he went!(mostly he wanted praise. he would say"you will be so proud of me Mommy?) Good luck!
J. G.

A MUST read is "To Train Up a Child." Get it today!!! They also have a website with helpful articles... nogreaterjoy.org
Email me if you want to borrow a copy of this book from me!

I'm not sure if this is much help to you or not but my daughter is 2 months older than yours & just pooped in the potty for the 2nd time today (the first being 12/07). She would kick & scream each time we would try to get her to poop anywhere but in her pull-up. She was at daycare when she successfully pooped in the potty today. So I think it has to do with seeing her other little friends (all younger than her) pooping in the potty. I just put her in panties a week & a half ago & when she needed to poop she would run put a pull-up on. Everyone told me "when she is ready, she will do it" so I have to say the same about your little one. When she is ready! Hope this helped some!

I have a friend who had a pottytrained 4 year old who wouldn't stop playing to go potty. She would tell her "what ever you do, DON'T go potty" and she'd run and go do it, at which point her mom would act "devistated" and "punish" her by tickling or whatever with a comment such as "Oh NO! I guess I'm going to have to _____" The trick is to get her to WANT to do it, because at that age it's hard to make them do something they don't want to do, whereas if she WANT's to do it, it will be MUCH easier for you in the long run.
Don't know if it will work for you or not, but Good luck either way!

You will probably get lots of advice telling you to wait until she is ready. I got the same advice and when my daughter was 29 months old I came to realize she was never just going to wake up one day and say "Hey mom lets potty train me". She was the exact same way didn't care if she was dirty. I purchased the 3-day Potty Training Guide and it worked in 3 days she was potty trained. You just need stop using pull-ups and diapers. Leave her in big girl panties all day and night. Within a couple of days she will get it and just start going. There are more directions in the book so I would purchase it. My best friend just used it for her 23 month old and she was potty trained in 3 days. The first two days are very hard and lots of laundry to do, but hang in there it gets better :).

Talk to your pediatrician. And, make wearing panties a reward. I have boys. When the youngest was reluctant to potty train at 3, he got tired of being left out. When Dad was leaving on a 3rd camping trip without him, quickly shouted "Hold on, I got my underwear on!" It was all about control for him.
Also, I let them sit facing the toilet because the fear of falling in was less.

I used the Everything Potty Training Book by Linda Sonna. It describes a few different potty training methods, but I went with the fast track toddler method that someone else described already. I think this is the best method for your child's age. The first two days are intense but it is really worth it!

I also made a chart and she could put a sticker on it each time she went in the potty. I drew a picture of the reward she would get when she did a poo in the potty. Things like a smoothie, a ride on the carousel at the mall and a visit to the park.

She does not get to watch TV, but I got an Elmo DVD on potty training and she was allowed to watch that on the laptop as long as she sat on the potty for the first two days. We also have books and LEGO blocks in the bathroom next to the potty. As soon as she gets it, all these things became unnecessary.

You might want to get rid of the pull ups, it only confuses them.

We are potty training this week. My daighter is little, but here is what is working so far for us:
1) TONS of princess and elmo panties- NO diaper except in the car or while sleeping (my daughter is in a crib so we aren't night training yet)
2) Blow bubbles or color in a book while sitting on potty
3) potty in front of TV with favorite shows on
4) 2 M&M's everytime uses potty right
5) a sticker each time she uses potty right (I made a chart with 6 squares and on top drew a picture of the prize she gets when she fills up the squares- like today she'll get a toy car after 6 times)- I bought a BUNCH of stuff out of Target's $1 bins for the good prizes, but the M&M's work well since she has never had candy before and that's the only time she is getting any.

I make a big deal of "oh, my, that's yucky... let's get cleaned up" when she has accidents. Kids aren't automatically granted the knowledge of what in this world is or isn't yucky. That is a learned thing, if they learn it's yucky then they like it less- but they must be taught.

Hope this helps. This is day 2 for us and we have had 2 accidents and 4 successes- which is better than yesterday- she had 8 accidents! Just don't let a pull up or a diaper be an option at home. Why should she care- it's just like a diaper.

Potty training is NOT for sissies! Stay tough, you have to pick your battles and this is one you must win!

try using underwear exclusively! That should do the trick.

My daughter was the same way. I tried pullups and I think it was a comfort thing. I let her run around with nothing on her and when she had to go she would go to the potty. But everytime I put the pullup on she peed. So have patience, she will do it when she is ready. Have you tried big girl pannies? Once mine got the idea she didn't want to pee in the pannies and have it running down her leg. I think I finally got her potty trained at 3 years 8 months. And once she got it she was done and even slept throught the night without potting in the bed.

Welcome to my world! Well...not anymore:) My daughter will be four in January and for the last three months she is fully potty trained! She even sleeps through the night. I'm not sure what I did though. I pretty much just gave up! I did take away certain privlidges for not wearing big girl panties. Like...she could only play on the computer if she was wearing "big girl" panties. She would then forget she was wearing them and wear them the rest of the day.
She too had no intrest, but eventually I found her currency (the computer) and I was able to then bargain with her. If you can find what your daughter loves the most and then use it as a bargaining tool, that might work for you too, but I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it because you don't want it to be a battle...she'll only resist more.
Just remember you're not the only mother with a three year old that's not potty trained and don't let anyone tell you there's something wrong with you or her. She's just on her own clock, that's all!

M.,

You need to "catch her in the act" and run her to the potty so she can finish her business in the right place (and then praise her up and down for it). And... don't get caught up in taking her to the bathroom every 10 minutes. It will teach her that you will do her "thinking" for her, and she will not go potty on her own when she feels the urge. I used www.easypottytraining.com. It worked like a charm. My 2 1/2 year old was telling me she had to go potty and would go by herself after 2 1/2 days (it's a 3-day program). I would HIGHLY recommend it to anyone! Best of luck!