Potty Training - Palmdale,CA

It's possible your daughter isn't ready to train if she just doesn't seem to "get it." I've asked lots of parents when and how their kids were successfully trained, and I've done a great deal of research on the subject. It seems pretty uniformly true that the quickest, lowest-stress success occurs only when child shows most of the signs of readiness, which may occur as late as 3 or 4. (Here are some helpful checklists: http://www.parentingscience.com/toilet-training-readiness...) Girls are usually, but not always, mature enough earlier. Children with developmental or speech delays are often somewhat slower.

What I think of as "pre-training" can be started to good effect with much younger children – helping them become acquainted with the potty, perhaps practice sitting, reading stories and watching videos about using the potty, role-playing, getting supplied with big-kid undies, etc. All these things can encourage the child to think positively about the process, and may promote emotional readiness.

The necessary physical and nervous development just take whatever time they take. Children who are "trained" because their parents remind them and/or physically take them to the potty every ___ minutes aren't actually trained. The parents are.

When a child is ready, she'll take to potty training with the same tenacity as when she learned to crawl, walk, or talk. And the actual training can take anywhere from a day to a couple of weeks, with parents supporting the child's lead. But no charts or rewards are generally needed. Just the child's own eagerness to move into her next stage of development.

I'm a preschool teacher and have potty trained a lot of kids and there are lots of things to try:
sticker charts
toy/reward bins
marble jars
treats
reading books on the potty
sitting with her while she is on the potty (singing songs?)

But if all else fails you need to think about a few things:

#1 potty training is a necessary skill that you child has to learn, it isn't like kicking a ball or coloring in the lines. She MUST learn to use the potty in order to function socially.

#2 having a 3 year old that uses a diaper can be unhealthy for her (to sit in urine or feces for any period of time) and the environment (if the diaper leaks- which is likely to happen because they are not designed to hold that amount of liquids or solids)

#3 not being potty trained can have a negative affect on your child's self help skills, sense of responsibility, self esteem and independence which is what she should be learning right now. Think of how proud she will be of herself when she pee's or poo's in the potty? Let her know you are proud too!

A few things to do is:
-Get her excited about underwear-let her go to the store and pick them out!
-Let her watch others use the potty -you or other children.
-Don't make it a choice- sitting on the potty is like seat belts, naps or baths. She HAS to sit on the toilet ever 1-2 hours (or more often in the beginning). She will scream, cry and be so angry, but remember she needs to do it- even if it is for 30 seconds. This is a good time for rewards or bribes.
-If nothing has worked yet go straight to underwear- yes you will have a lot of accidents so be ready. Make sure she sits on the toilet every 30-60 minutes the first day or two. She will soon figure out that it is easier and quicker to go potty versus going in her pants then having to wash-up and change.Be sure that she isn't punished but should change activities after an accident. Also, make her involved in cleaning and changing (help her of course) but allow her to see that when we choose to pee in our pants we choose to clean up the mess and yes it is icky. It is a natural consequence. Don't ever punish her for an accident, but let her know it is her body, her pee and her clothes so she needs to be responsible. I know this sounds harsh and will be awful for a few days or maybe even weeks, but keep in mind most good preschools and all kindergartens will not accept non-toilet trained children.

The last most important thing is don't give up and be persistent! Do not go backwards. If you make the leap to pull ups or, preferably, underwear do not go back- this shows your child that if they don't want to do it they will fight and they will win, it also shows them if something is hard they can just give up if they don't succeed at first. Putting your child in underwear for weeks even with 4 accidents per day will show her that you are proud of her progress (even if it is slight) and have faith in her and her abilities.

We did a Potty Party. I decorated the bathroom, placed her potty books in there, bought her little gifts that she would get during the day and printed out a candyland map where we moved her marker during the day....at the end of the day(which corresponded with her marker landing at candy castle) my mom came over with balloons and cupcakes. IT WORKED! She had a few accidents here and there afterwards and we still used pull-ups for nighttime but she was day-trained, she as fully potty trained within a couple of months of the potty party.
Good Luck!

A week after my daughter turned 3 she still did not want to use the toilet and had tried everything that was suggested to do. So, one afternoon I picked up my purse and announced I was going shopping with the little girl who was NOT wearing diapers anymore. She said..."I go, I go". I said, well are you wearing your diapers? Without saying anything she ran to her room, put on her underwear, grabbed her purse and ran to the door announcing she was ready to go! And that was it!!! How lucky was I!