Potty Training 20 Month Old...

Hey, Sarah ~

Wow, that is a lot of work with the trainer potty. Have you ever considered just having her use the "grown-up potty"? It might appeal to her even more - it did to my daughter - and you won't have to clean up AGAIN, should she decide she's not quite finished.

As for the panty vs. diaper issue, here's what we did. I took my daughter to the store - just her and mommy time - and let her choose which panties she wanted. (Chances are, you and your little girl haven't done that with diapers.) Then we got home and made a HUGE deal out of the fact that "Mercy has big girl panties now, instead of diapers!" Let her watch you pack up the rest of her diapers for donation. When she has an accident, of course you don't want to be hard on her, but you'll say something like, "Uh oh! That doesn't belong in the panties! Come on, let's go use the potty." Afterwards, let her help you rinse them out in the bathtub and then put them in the laundry basket, or just put them straight in the washer. She'll see that you don't just throw them out like diapers. Just a few suggestions to get your feet wet. (Wait, maybe that wasn't the best phrase to use...sorry.)

Happy potty training! :)

~ R.

Hi Sarah,
I just want to repeat what Jessica said: you are doing awesome, it just takes time for it all to sink in.

It sounds like she is so excited to do all the steps you taught her, though, and she doesn't have the "feeling" to know when she's done or not done (very normal - this feeling is hard for many kids to "get").

I'd suggest giving her a "timer." Either real, or play a CD of 3 or 4 songs (same songs every time) she has to sit through before she can get up to do all the next steps. This will give her a cue (since she doesn't know why she has to sit there or not), of when she is "finished."

I think the panties issue is the same thing. If my son (now 3) had underpants on for the first months after he got potty-trained, I had to make sure I told him when to go every time, or he would have an accident. (Luckily, this was during warm-weather months, so he could spend a lot of time "commando" at home - lol). By the way, the first time he finally told me he had to use the potty - I felt like the smartest Mommy on the planet!!!

So - YES, keep up the great work!
T

My son also trained before he was 2. Try having one special "potty book" that you read to her only in the bathroom while she goes and try to emphasize that you've got to finish the book! If you can, have her go on the regular toilet, maybe with one of those "rings" and her feet on a stool. This way she can't just hop up and down on her own. My son never used those kid potties - he wanted to use what everyone else used.

Let her be naked when you can and dress her in comfy, loose shorts with NO undies for a few days/weeks. You can also look for (or make) those big "bloomers" with elastic at the waist and legs. My son was the same... he'd have pee accidents if he had on underwear, but never if he was naked, so I let him "go commando" under his shorts and it worked 100%! He's never had a poop accident. It only took a week or so, but he was often naked at home. (it was summertime for us and it's easier to let a boy run around naked!) You'll be done in no time!

Hi Sarah- I don't have too many words of advice for you, however I do have some words of encouragement-- "Hang in there, keep doing what you are doing, she will get it soon!" I am in the middle of potty training my daughter who is 28 months old. I tried back in December when she was 24 months old but she wasn't ready. She is doing much better now. I have been frustrated that she seems like she is potty trained during the day because she is wearing panties all day long and using the potty great, except that she can't really tell me when she has to go. Everyone I have talked to has encouraged me to just stick with it and in a little while (weeks to months) it will click and she will start telling me, and not relying on me to say "It's time to try on the potty". I think the most important thing you can do now is work on the skills of pulling up/down her panties and pants, sitting on the potty, wiping properly, flushing, and washing hands. I would keep taking her to the potty every 30 minutes to an hour. It is hard on you, but eventually she will do it on her own. The younger the child, the less time they can hold their pee...so hang in there in a few months you will be able to take her every hour instead of every 30 min. If you find that it isn't the right time for her, it is okay to try again in a few months. When we quit back in December, I slowly introduced "potty sits" She sat on the potty before bath time. A few weeks later we started having her sit every morning after she wakes up. A couple weeks later we added after lunch etc....

Good luck- you will do great! I find this to be one of the hardest parts of parenting right now. I just keep telling myself to stick with it, and now that I am seeing success it really feels good.

Sarah,
We love potty time because we paint our toe nails while we sit and wait for all the poop to come out. You might have to be careful with her being so excited and jumping up and down, but I let my daughter choose two inexpensive colors at the store and then we paint while we wait on the potty.
Good luck!

One distraction method we used was to go to Dollar Tree and buy those little sponge animal capsules that you put in water to expand. We would put a large metal kitchen mixing bowl on her lap with warm water in it and give her one of those to play with in the warm water (we put a towel on her lap to help catch any water she splashed out). The warm water would help her relax so she could go all the way and the capsule distracted her long enough so she didn't really pay attention to what her body was doing. Plus, she couldn't just pop up with a large bowl on her lap. You could also try bribing her with M&M's. Tell her that she only gets one when she has completely finished going potty. Both worked well for us. Good luck! Sounds like you're almost there.