My DD has been potty-trained for several months. She's been dry day and night since about January this year. In the last 3 weeks or so, she has been having accidents during the day. I can understand a few accidents, but she had 3 yesteray, 2 the day before and I think 2 the day before that. They have been almost daily and multiple times. She doesn't complain about it hurting to go and she's been to the dr. for her 3 yr check-up and nothing seems to be physically wrong. She's also been on an antibiotic due to a cat bite (preventive measure), so I really don't think there's a "health" concern. I can't think of anything that has changed at home or at daycare (my daycare provider is very helpful and cooperative and frustrated/concerned) to cause this. She seems to be doing it on purpose. If you ask her to try to go potty after her nap, she'll say she already did and will have wet pants (I know she was dry immediately after her nap). Yesterday I asked her to come in the house for supper from playing outside. She said "no" and when I verbally "made" her come in, she was wet once she got inside the house. She's normally very proud to go potty by herself and we've offered incentives (ice cream and trips to a special playground) for being dry all day. We've tried timeouts for wetting. My mom seems to think we should just ignore it. No incentives or punishments...change her and move on. Maybe it's just a phase that will go away. She was very easy to train...one day we asked if she wanted to wear big girl panties.."Yes"...got the timer out and she just "tried" every few minutes until she just stated going on her own. (Well maybe a little more to it, but you get the jist). I don't know what to do at this point. Any suggestions?
It's only been a few days, but she is doing much better. We stopped rewarding and punishing/scolding. We went back to the beginning and just kept reminding her every hour or so and made her "try" even when she said she didn't have to go. Daycare is doing the same. She has had a few occasions of wet/damp panties, but no soaking pants from just going. She has also gone on her own without prompting a couple times. Thanks for the advise.
Hi J.
If you have taken her to the doctor and had him do a uranalasy and it came back fine then you may want to decide if it is the medicine she is on that dosen't let her feel the urge to go. If you think that is not the case then I agree with your mother and she is doing it for attention so don't give it to her. Good Luck T.
Hi J.,
Our son went thru something similar. We said oh no you had an accident, wet underwear feel yucky. He was testing his independence and that was one of the things he could have control over. I would really try not to bring it up again after the incident. I just went back to setting a timer or going to the bathroom at certain times and putting him on the potty. Now he is just used to me saying it is time to go potty. The only thing is he rarely tells me he has to go. Since I automatically take him he probably never gets to the point where he feels he has to go now. He also holds in his stool (because he can control that and I can't do anything about it) We actually have to put him on medicine right now so that it is so soft he can't hold it in anymore. I've been told that this will just be a phase but pretty frustrating for my husband and I.
I hope that your little girls doesn't start with the poop too.
S.
It isn't unusal for some kids to do a back slide on the potty training. It is a control issue for them. They don't want to stop playing to go potty or they just want to control something and choose this as a way to have some control. My granddaughter was doing that for a bit and she would put off going potty until she had an accident. If she was out somewhere we would tell her if she wet her pants we would have to leave and go home. If she was outside playing I would tell her to make sure she goes inside to go potty since it only takes a few minutes and if she wets her pants she would have to stay inside. She puts off going still and it is a race to the bathroom, but she always makes it. Don't yell at her or give her harsh punishment, just common sense conscequences. At first when my granddaughter would have an accident she would say "that's ok, it's an accident" I finally told her that an accident is when you don't mean to do something but when you put off going potty when you are reminded, it isn't an accident anymore, it is on purpose and that isn't ok. She had to be told this a few times but she finally understood it.
I agree with your mom. The same thing happened to my 3 year old son. Potty trained in a day and then had accidents like yours. It is normal in their little world. We tried punishing him, but when we finally just let it go and ignored it ( of course we changed him) it just went away by itself. Don't worry about it, she'll get back on track. Sometimes it can also be the attention, even though it is negative.
As your mom suggested, clean things up and move on. When my daughter this exact thing, we had her clean up herself, ie. put her wet pants in the hamper, and than take a bath and get redressed. She got no help from us, which we would normally do when just getting dressed for the morning or ready for bed as we wanted her to understand that if you have an accident than you need to take responsibility for it. We didn't present it as a punishment, just a basic skill to learn. Hope this helps.
