Postpartum - Trevor,WI

You've rec'd so many responses...but I just wanted you to know that I, too, have been there...twice actually. It does get better...as a matter-of-fact, I consider myself to be well again and my newest son is 5 months--I actually started feeling like my old self was coming back after about 2 1/2 to 3 months this time around (my older son is almost 5). If you ever need to talk, please feel free to call me...seriously. ###-###-####) Hang in there....this too shall pass.

K. :-)

Hi C.,
I see you already have a lot of responses but I just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I've been trough it as well and I must say supplements helped me a lot. I am still very emotional, down and depressed around my period but I talked to my obgyn about it and the yaz pill
(anticonception) keeps my hormones more at the same level and the periode of being down, emotional, etc is down form aprox 1 week to 1 or 2 days right before my period. Also I am taking a supplement especially for PMS. The brand is not for sale here (it is a dutch supplement I use) but I can give you the ingredients and I think you should be able to find something similar at whole foods.

It contains:
1,2 gr evening primrose oil
LA omega 6 680mg
GLA omega 6 120mg
Niacine (vitamine B6)
Vitamin B6
vitamin C
Vitamin E
Magnesium
Zinc

Hi C., I just had a baby in January and had some postpartum depression for about 6 weeks. I just started overloading on the B6 vitamine. It worked for me, I know everyone is different but it might be worth a try.
Jamie

C.,

I feel so bad for you- I had a mild case of PPD with both of my children. It's bad.

I don't blame you for getting off the meds. They are NO good for you!

Have you tried taking flaxseed oil? It's a good fat, and great "brain" food! I take it everyday and it helps me SO much.

The other thing I would suggest is if you can get outside-go for a walk- even 10 minutes will help. The other thing is stay away from sugar too.

I feel bad for you- I know what it's like to have a fear of dying. I think some of that (for me) was because now I have two children and I would go into panic mode because I worried what happen to them if I died.

I wish there was a magical pill that would make this all go away for you. Is your husband sensitive to what is going on? My husband was great- He would just let me have my crying fits, and then I would tell him I needed a hug etc. It was awful- there were days I thought I was losing it.

As far as your achy body-Honey give yourself a break- You JUST had a baby- ONLY 4 months ago! Taking on a 6 year old and a newborn is hard work! (I have a 6 year old boy and a one year old boy and I work FT too). It's hard to adjust- Don't forget your 6 yr. old is probably pretty self sufficient, and now you have to go back into baby mode- less sleep, more work etc. It takes a toll on your body.

Try and get more rest when you can. You need it physically and mentally.

If I can help any other way please let me know.

You will be okay and in a few months you will be feeling better. Give yourself a break and credit. You are doing a lot of work taking care of your two children.

MV

C., you are not crazy, that is exactly how I felt after my second baby too! Such a fear of death, that is all I thought about. I never went on meds, I self medicated with M&M's :) which I don't recommend it takes even longer to get off the baby weight. I did go into counseling which helped. By the time my daughter was 12 months I started to feel better. I finally had her napping and sleeping through the night. Just make sure you are eating well and try to get as much sleep as possible (I know how hard that is). It may take awhile, but you will feel "normal" again. If you ever need to talk, feel free to private message me and I will give you my phone number. I am home for most of the day. Sometimes it helps just to talk to someone who has been there. Good luck and hang in there.

I have not had PPD but know it can really get ya. I wanted to suggest seeing a professional homeopath, which can help you get back into balance, (PPD is an imbalance in your body/system). My homeopathic Dr. is Dr. Josephine Polich in Naperville (www.dupagehomeopathic.com). She treats people w/ depression and issues just as you described (strange fears, anxieties). Depression is often 50% better in 2 days after treatment w/ a homeopathic remedy, which is natural, and has no side effects like other prescriptions. Here is a newsletter she wrote on depression:
www.dupagehomeopathic.com/newsletters/depression.pdf

Email me offlist if you need info on how to find other practitioners if she is not close to where you live.

Hi C.,
I went throught a delayed post partum after my son was born. I know exactly where your coming from. The Dr. put me on zoloft and it seems to be working like a champ for me. I know if one med doesent work, you can def try a couple others to see what suits you best.
You can also try the natural route and do some acpuncture for anxiety and depression. I have found that anxiety can sometimes be a state of mind- when it happens remind yourself that this isnt you and it should just go away..I know it sounds crazy but it works. Also breathing is a big par of anxiety. Learn to breate deep through your belly.
I just statred Yoga and I love it!
Not sure where you live in the city, but there is a great place on SHeffield called Harmony Health, and they can def help you there . I go twice a week and see a woman Lisa and I feel great!
Just remember you will get through this and it is the price we pay in mommyhood to have little angels. If you need anything dont hesitate to ask... best of luck
K.

I had postpartum depression with my second child. I didn't want to take meds. The supplements help, but aerobic exercise was the thing that really saved me. The day after I would exercise always went much smoother. So, I made myself do it daily and over the course of a couple months everything continued to improve. It needs to be somewhat intense for at least 20 minutes. There's tons of science to back that up now too.

C.,
You will be okay! I know this is hard, but think about all the good things in your life. Write them down everyday and speak with someone that encourages you about your situation. One day at a time you will see improvement. Just be thankful for the little things you see everyday, like waking up and being with your children. You being able to see them everyday and watch them grow to achieve developmental milestones. I went through it and now my children are 3 and 5. They make me very happy and they bring a constant joy to my heart. Also, support and help from your religious organization or doctor can truly make a difference. Sometimes they have a support group.

Peace

I just had twins less than a month ago and I am going through ppd, also. There is a website that might help you find some support. www.ppdsupportpage.com. Also, my local hospital has a weekly support group for women and once a month for couples. You may want to call your local hospitals and see if they have those programs. Good luck, I know it's hard.

Hi,

I had PPD with my first baby. It was horrible. I couldnt eat, I had no interest in the baby, I cried for no reason. I was a walking zombie. My husband did not know what to do with me, so he got my parents involved and they took me to a psychiatrist and i joined a new moms support group which was wonderful. So many moms go through this and dont talk about it. I was put on prozac which worked well but it took about 4 weeks before I felt better. There is a newer SSRI (type of antipressant) out now that only takes about 5 days if not less to help you feel better. My Best friend was put on it for PPD and it is called Lexapro, so if you need to switch meds ask your MD about this. ***** Please take the medicine if you have to. Many people are either too proud or stubborn to be on medicine. It does not speak bad of you; you just need to get over this hurdle.****** Take care and best wishes, D. :)

I had PPD with my first son, but didn't know it. I nearly had a mental breakdown when he was 9 months. I eventually went on meds. It took me several different trials before I found the right medicine for me, then it had to be tweaked dosage-wise for a while. For my second son, I switched to zoloft so I would not have to go off meds completely. I took it during the entire pregnancy and 14 months of breastfeeding. I was a much happier confident mom this time around.

GL and don't let anyone make you feel unworthy. If one med doesn't work for you, keep trying til you get a good fix. Get a psychiatrist, as they are better able to work with you than a GP. and keep going to the counselor. I love mine.

C.
This too shall pass....
This is what a pediatric nurse said to me when I was in deep with my second child...I felt everything you were feeling.
You should really stay on the medication your OB put you on. It takes anywhere from 2-4 weeks for it to really work. But you need to let your body get used to the medication, and it takes time for the zombie like side effects to go away. You can ask for a different brand.
vitamins are great, but for what you are describing, you need more help.
Also, since you are having physical pain, (the achy feelings), cymbalta does a nice job treating depression with body pain.
If you are breastfeeding, there are antidepressants that are safe to take while you are nursing.
Once you are properly treated, you should feel more like yourself once the medication is really working...by 4 weeks.
Postpartum depression can last up to year. But again, if you are being treated corrected, you do NOT feel like you are feeling today. You will feel SO MUCH BETTER!!

If you ever feel like harming yourself, or your children....call for help right away. Do not be embarrased.....so many moms suffer from pp depression!!
Thanks for speaking up!

K.

Hang in there!! You WILL feel better. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Everything you are thinking and feeling is normal and you are doing the right thing by getting help and talking about it. You will feel like your old self again.

C., I Postpartum years ago and at that time no one even talked about it.

It sounds like when your hormones change you get the feeling of depression.

Mail me off list and I will give you a place that I think can help you. ____@____.com

M.
www.spiritual-ethical-will.com

I'm dealing with PPD now. I didn't have it with my first, but I've read that sometimes mothers who have several children can be more prone to it (more demand from them).

I, personally, do not believe that medication is the way to handle hormonal/emotional imbalances. I go to a naturopathic doctor and take herbal and vitamin supplements. I've been taking them for a month now and I feel so much better.

PPD is also an emotional imbalance and you'll need to find someone you can talk with to help you find ways of coping/dealing with that. For me, I have a 5 1/2 year old, a 15 month old and a baby due in 5 weeks. My husband works a lot of hours and was going fishing all weekend every weekend...leaving me no time to myself.

I had to finally sit down with him and talk with him about this and get more support from him.

I do have to say that not dealing with PPD can make it worse. You don't always need meds to deal with the imbalance and it can be remedied without meds, but you have to deal with it from all aspects.

It does get better and it will get better. I hope you find a way that works for you.

Vitamin B and fish oil greatly helps keep the PPD in check (especially around your period).

Good luck!!

I suffered from postpartum with my second child as well. It will last a different length of time for everyone. If the medicine you were put on is not working to help you feel better - CHANGE IT!!! There are so many choices now adays, I urge to go back to or go to a different doctor specializing in postpartun treatment and change the medicine.
Second, what helped me but was the hardest thing to do, was to exercise and get outdoors. Stay active.
Finally, keep talking, to firends, this page, there are support groups at hospitals etc., but don't suffer alone. What you are feeling is real and does not 'just pass'.
And the last thing, set up a support group of a place or people that you can bring the baby to when you are really feeling down or so you can get moving, just keep active, and it will get better.

I would consider a topical progesterone cream 20-40 mg per day (most pumps have a doser), you can get it at the health food store. Stop it when you get your period, and then resume afterward.

I had it as well, but for only a short time-- I have depression issues that are lifelong, though, and I have better skills and methods of treating this that work for me because of it. Postpartum Depression can last a week, or a year, as i am to understand it, but my OB and PCP were both HUGE on the progesterone cream, and I supplemented with anti-anxiety pills (Klonopin, which I was taking previously).

****EDIT**** Postpartum depression is thought to be caused by the rapidly decreased levels of progesterone after delivery which is rampant during pregnancy, and he body can be slow to get back to a normal rhythm. In a way, you can say it is addicted to progesterone, and you are having withdrawals, which is where the cream comes in. The onset can be anywhere from a few days to a year later, but usually resolves itself within a few months... so hang in there.

It also helps to watch your sugars and caffeine, and take 8, yes EIGHT Omega 3's a day. You can prescription ones that aren't as gross called Omacor, but they recently changed the name to something with an L that is escaping me right now. They're horse pills, and it's best to not take them all at once. They will take a few weeks to kick in but I find them extremely helpful.

Keep up with the therapist, and make sure your husband is supporting you and that you are asking for what you want and need from those that you trust. Don't feel guilty, it's a readjustment process for your body, and it's not your fault,and you're going to be okay. Soon, this will seem a long way off.

Good Luck.

Hi C.! PPD is tough! Definately go see a counselor and try a different medication. I have horrible anxiety and Lexapro works for me. I was on Zoloft, but, too much zombie was the side effect. With Lexapro, the emotions are still there, but, th range doesn't sweep such great lengths. Also, when I had PPD, I felt alone. I did recognize it but did not do the proper thing: I kept it to myself. Eventually, it went away, but, boy did I suffer in the meantime. Vitamins, exercise and counseling are vital. Medication is a tough choice. I am glad I made that choice. I waited too long out of shame about my anxiety. Now, I wish I hadn't suffered in silence. I tell everyone that I have this, now. It is no longer a secret. You don't have to suffer alone. Get help and know you are doing what is best for you and your family!

I have postpartum and anxiety and my son is 16 months old. I think the anxiety comes from the responsibility of having two children. For me the anxiety is worse which makes me more depressed because I keep thinking I should be able to handle this...my mom had 5! I would ask your doctor about an anti-anxiety med, that might help with the depression. Not sure how long it lasts...could seem like forever if not treated properly. My counselor explained to me that most moms with postpartum don't have to be on meds forever, they just need it until their brain starts getting the serotonin properly which is often corrected by the medication within 6-12 mos. But like I said, the anxiety triggers it for me and I am still working through it. GOod luck!

C.,

I went thru a couple medications before I found the one that worked for me. My suggestion... try another medication. don't mess around with post partum depression or anxiety - they can both have negative effects elsewhere in your life.

I think vitamins are great, but last time I checked they do not change the chemical/physiological reactions in your brain - without sounding like i'm bashing Tom Cruise, it's a very scientology view in my opinion to treat these things with vitamins. if you have a vitamin deficiency, then absolutely supplement, but in the case of depression/anxiety/OCD, it's a chemical/physical imbalance in your brain...

**EDIT** - i did look this up and I stand corrected - apparently vitamins can help with some forms of depression, when symptoms are caused by a deficiency. I take a multi-vitamin every day and it's not changed my issues with depression... so from my personal perspective, that hasn't helped my form of depression :) I was wrong - my apologies :)

try something else. I personally take Paxil - it helps with many of my 'mental issues'. But when i was taking other meds that didn't work for me, I found myself obsessively washing my hands, counting everything in sight, getting upset when something wasn't perfectly level or straight, getting pissed at my family because they put the salad fork in with the dinner forks in the silverare drawer after emptying the dishwasher (i then just started doing everything myself so that it was done 'right' - because i would HAVE to fix it), avoiding all social contact because I was positive I was going to do or say something wrong and people would be mad at me or not like me, I was literally pooping mucous/liquid 10-12 times a day and I had the most terrible migraines and stomach issues by stressing myself out.

clearly vitamins weren't what i needed :) I am not ashamed to say that I need to be on medication - for the sake of my family and friends and myself :)

I had PPD with both of mine- but I was too stubborn with the 1st to ask for help and the 2nd took me 6 months to finally talk to the Dr. It took some trial and error to get a low dose medication that made me feel better. Talking to a counselor to work out issues I had from my childhood help to explain strange feelings- like fear of dying helped also. I wish I could tell you it will end tomorrow because it is terrible to feel this way, but it can last for over a year. Work with your Dr. to find the right medication- even if you do not like taking meds. I know that is one of the reasons I fought it. When my husband and friends reminded me that this wasn't just about me- but about them I kept trying till they got it right. Hang in there and remember this is temporary!

Hi. Glad you're getting professional help and talking about this. Medication can be very helpful. If you felt like a zombie, even at the lowest level, you may still have been on too much (maybe ask the Dr. if you could cut the pill in half?) Also, if you really want to go hard core natural, you should consider cutting out as much sugar and white flour products as possible, eating protein, and making sure you get exercise (aerobic where you sweat) as possible. If I really exercise, I get a nice "high" that lasts for a day or two and keeps me going. Also, lack of sleep can add to depression (along with all those crazy hormones, obviously). Try not to do too much and just nap if you can. If you're really not wanting to do the doctor thing, then see if you can spare a babysitter even a few hours for a nap or two a week if you're able. Also, take the time to put exercise in your lifestyle...you really need it. I also found out for myself, that low iron absorption can add to depression. Most docs won't or don't know that. Also, animal-based iron can be better absorbed than vegetable, and most iron pills can cause constipation, so a lot of women avoid them. However, if you're able to eat salads or even Metamucil for fiber and exercise at least 3 times a week, this can help fight against the constipation. Also, getting a vegatable-based iron capsule for less constipation (like at GNC or Whole Foods) and then adding an animal source of iron, like Dessicated Liver tablets (also at Whole Foods), you can help the iron absorbtion--this significantly helped my moods in my second pregnancy (I've had 4 kids in 5 years--my youngest is 2 months old). I've been diagnosed pre-kids with Bipolar Type 2 and was on numerous trials of meds, none to my liking, and went off everything with my first pregnancy. So...I've done a lot of trial and error with my mood regulation. The biggest factors for me are:
1. Sleep
2. Diet
3. Exercise
4. Iron supplement
5. Talking and socializing

Good luck with everything...I know it's really hard, but you'll get through it! If you really feel like dying or even running away and leaving your kids or dropping them on the floor (or other crazy thoughts) then make sure you talk to someone. I had a friend that jumped to her death off of a parking garage and she had postpartum. She was successful, relatively well-off, and was about to launch a successful business and had everything going for her with two kids and a nice husband....nobody saw it coming...take these things seriously!!!!!! She had just met with a few colleagues just DAYS before the suicide, and nobody suspected a thing! TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF SO YOU CAN TAKE CARE OF YOUR BABIES!!!!

I had to insist to my husband that I needed some help. My mom even payed for a massage just to get me out of the house. I know times are tough these days, and money is tight, but it doesn't really matter if you're dead or so depressed you can't take care of your kids. Just realize that even if it's a financial burden right now, it's only short-term (probably less than a year) of hard times and then you'll be over it.

Good luck, my heart goes out to you. I don't know where you live in the country, but lack of sunlight doesn't help, either. I live in the midwest, and the spring really helps my moods, so hopefully happy times will be here again soon!

I had postpartum depression with my 2nd & 3rd child. With my 2nd I took antidepressants for 3 months. Following my 3rd birth I called a ppd hotline & spoke with a nurse who explained that depression was about unexpressed anger. With the help of a therapist who eventually referred me to a hypnotist I was able to let go of 'old baggage' that had come to the surface with the birth of my children.
Wishing you wellness.

I had post partum shortly after both my children were born. The first time was the worst, since on top of that, our son was in the NICU, which as you can imagine, cranked up the stress levels on top of the depression symptoms. I remember about three days after my son was born looking at my parents and saying "I have never felt so depressed before in my entire life." It does pass. For some slower than others. It wasn't quite so bad with the birth of our daughter. Talk to those in your support network. Don't bottle it up or think there is "something wrong" with you. It's simply hormones and other chemicals sorting themselves out after pregnancy, birth and learning to become a mother. If needed, consult a psychiatrist (I am a big supporter of going to "the experts" for psychiatric medicine) and see if a short term of antidepressants can't get you over the worst of it or if the symptoms linger or intensify. If we didn't have some form of reaction to it all, I think I would be more concerned :) Best of luck!

Have you ever tried taking St. John's Wort? It's always worked well for me. I'm not sure about the effects if your breastfeeding. It's an herbal supplement so it should be Ok to take, but may just changed the taste of it. Hang in there!

Yes, I have been in your shoes! Your story sounds exactly like mine. You will be okay and it will end. My doctor worked on medication more with me and educated me on the changes in brain chemistry and hormones. For me, I was able to find a good fit at a low dose that did not leave me feeling like a zombie. I know what you are going through. If you need to talk, I'm here.

I suffered it after my twins were born, I had suffered from depression after my dad died when I was 18 so I knew there was a possiblity. Anyway I went on Cymbalta which also helps with physical pain as well as the depression. It last differently with everyone, I would talk to my doc and change the script if you don't like the way you feel. Cymbalta didn't make me feel like a zombie, it really did help. Don't ingore your symptoms, maybe seeing a therapist would help as well. I have a very good one in teh Carol Stream area, not sure where you live? Let me know if you want her name and number!!

Good Luck
K.
Single Mom to almost 4 year old B/G twins.

Hi C.!
Vitamins,Breastfeeding, and EXERCISE helps with postpartum. I had postpartum with my first child, and I was breastfeeding. I had told my doctor how I was feeling, and she suggested the exercise and vitamins. Breastfeeding slowly brings down your pregnancy hormone levels, while the vitamins and exercise give your brain a natural high. I especially took a vitamin with DHA in it (fish oil) that I purchased at a vitamin shop. It really did work. I did the same thing for my 3 other children, and no problems. I know a lot of people who went on medication and had the same complaints and concerns you do.
Hope this helps.
M.
M.

I'm a 60 yr old G'ma. I had it after my 2nd child - my daughter did too. It will go away - don't get impatient with yourself. Part of your battle is done - you are wise enough to recognize what is happening and you have help - and someone to talk to. Hopefully others will respond to this and you will know you are not alone. When I had it, no one reconized anything - now many people know that postpartum is a real problem, but that it can be worked with. Keep going - keep contact with others. Enjoy your little ones as much as possible

pp can be Hell honey. I feel so bad for you. I was on Prozac for a while. I found myself in a daze while driving the car, running stoplights because I was starring at the opposite one etc. Dr. put me on another drug that is made for other symptoms and I've been fine more or less. The depression probably comes from the added responsibility of another little one. The mortality is a real issue because you are needed twice as much (and what would happen to them if something happened to you). See. It makes sense. Keep talking to the counselor and other women. It helps to see how many women this really affects. Good luck and GOD bless you and your little ones.

Hi C., I had it too only after my second child, and it was really hard, not only on me, but every one around me. I also did not want medication, and with a lot of support, was able to get through it. I also have a thyroid condition, and that made it worse. After a baby your hormones are crazy and your thyroid can get out of balance, and since it controls so much, it really affected my mood too. Maybe ask your doctor about a tsh test to check your thyroid hormone levels. It couldn't hurt. You are smart to be taking vitamins and be aware that your nutrition/diet will absolutely effect your mood. Just know that this will pass, and that a lot of women go through this. You are not alone or crazy!! Just experiencing a perfectly normal reaction to all the changes in your body. Good luck and take care. -Jen

Please make sure doc checks your Thyroid levels AND that the TSH is between .3 - 3.00. Also check progesterone levels. These 2 imbalances are common after post-partum and commonly ignored. You will feel better again, I've been there a couple of times. (For progesterone, homefirst.com makes a natural one)God Bless,
N.

HI!! I could have wrote this exact thing about 4 years ago!!!! My was not classified as postpartum but anxiety!! I had my daughter almost 5 years after my son, everything was completely normal with my son....a little weepy the first couple weeks but nothing severe by any means. Then my daughter was born and wow was I different....I started to have panic attacks, I would come home and tell my husband I thought I was dying. Every time I got a headache I thought I had a brain tumor and would get my self so worked up I couldn't control the anxiety I felt. I was convinced I was crazy and couldn't figure out why I had suddenly changed so much. Finally my Dr. put me on anxiety meds and what a change. I feel like a whole new person again. SOME have said there may be some truth in that when women get preg with daughters their hormone level changes so much that it throws everything out of whack! I have no proof of that theory but I know speaking for me that EVERYTHING changed from the time I got preg with my daughter (looking back I felt anxious even while preg with her and just didn't realize it). I hope this helps~~I know how you feel!!!!! You are NOT crazy!! My advice....don't take meds for depression but for anxiety (some are used to treat both) you will feel like yourself within a few days...I know I did :o) Good Luck to you!! Enjoy that family--(girls really are a lot of fun :o) )

Sounds like you may have anxiety, since you are having fears of dying. I use to have anxiety and I had the same fears. Talk to your doctor or psychiatrist about this and they can give you meds for anxiety and depression, instead of depression alone.

I suffered it too. Hugs!!!! Stay on meds, get help. It will end, but you need help to do it.

Please all 866-ENH MOMS - open 24 hours a day - for anything!!!!

"Your total wellness is important to during this special time in your life. Just as you, your doctors and nurses pay special attention to keeping your body healthy, remember that your spirits are just as important. If you think you may be suffering from postpartum depression, you are not alone, we can help you find help.

We have a 24 hour crisis hotline where we can help you find the help you need. Please call us at 866.ENH.MOMS (866.364.6667)."

good article: http://www.ama-assn.org/amednews/2008/02/18/hlsa0218.htm
"Beyond the baby blues: A spectrum of postdelivery conditions - Asking the right questions is central to diagnosing and treating postpartum disorder."

Hi C.. I had what my OB called "baby blues" after my second child. I felt irratible,overwhelming sadness though I knew my life was amazing & I should be happy, but couldn't shake it. My OB put me back on the pill even though I was nursing. It did help to even things out a bit. Also, exercise really helped and sunshine. It lasted about a year though and then just went away. Be persistent in finding relief - you are you're own best advocate.

I had the baby blues after my first for about two or three months. I cried all the time, felt like I was doing everything wrong, I was sleep deprived big time (that just made it worse), I was torn about staying home with my baby and not going back to work, I often daydreamed about going in the backyard and shooting myself against the tree we had (so I wouldn't make a mess that everyone would have to clean up). I felt like my husband would be better off without me and he could find a better, happier wife that had it together.

I didn't get on antidepressants. I took them for a short time when I was in college and all they did was make me daydream about driving off bridges and whether anyone would attend my funeral...my mother made me flush them.

I had to deal with depression the old fashioned way. I prayed alot. I've had a problem off and on since I was about 10 years old. I can honestly say for the past eight years of so I've gotten a handle on it. And I can only attribute it to one thing. Getting into a good church and really developing a relationship with God that is real. Nothing else worked for me. I tried drugs, counseling and so on.

Now when I had the baby blues I leaned on God and my husband. I never wanted to harm my baby as some mothers do, but I did want to harm myself. I confided in my husband and he loved on me that much more which helped.

I'm not against doctors, counselors, or even antidepressants...but everyone is different and has to deal with it in a way that works for them. Not everyone can be treated the same way. The important thing is you are trying to figure it all out and work your way through it. Don't give into it...you know the way it drags you down and makes you want to hide under the covers all day. Fight it. Confide in someone that you can trust. Do some things for yourself so you feel better...don't go around feeling ugly or whatever (for awhile I just gave into the whole notion that I was fat and ugly...I didn't try to lose the weight, I didn't put on makeup, I didn't do anything to my hair, I wore the frumpiest clothes to cover myself up) At some point I decided that at one point in my life I cared about my appearance and I wasn't a bad looking woman and that for my daughter's sake and my husband's sake I needed to get it together. I didn't want to be the fat, frumpy, slob mom that showed up at school for my kids. I didn't want my husband to wonder what happened to his beautiful bride.

Now I'm still overweight to some degree but I try to keep it in check. I put on some makeup to improve the look of my skin...some mascara to look a little prettier. I do my hair to look like a care. I get dressed everyday. And it helped.

Taking care of myself was the first step for me. Then I started concentrating on being the best mommy and wife. I researched things I could do at home to encourage my daughters mental and physical development. I researched recipes to cook at home. I started researching home improvement projects so I could decorate my house and my daughter's room. I asked my mother-in-law to teach me to sew. I started gardening again. I volunteered to help in the church nursery. I started making meals for those that just had surgery or a baby.

Helping others is a great way to forget your own troubles. It lifts your spirits like nothing else.

Now the physical pain could be a manifestation of your depression. Have you tried to go for long walks to work it out. Start an exercise program to work those muscles. If that doesn't work then you may need to go back to the doctor to make sure there is nothing else physically to worry about.

Another thing you might try is to start concentrating on the positive. Every time you feel the urge to start dwelling on something negative wipe it out of your mind. Start thinking about your beautiful children that you are blessed with. Start thinking of your wonderful husband. Your home. Your family. Dwell on things that you really should be thankful for and tell yourself over and over that you are. It is almost like you are brainwashing yourself. But sometimes we have to do that to be happy. Some are blessed with a happy disposition...others like myself had to develop it and convince themselves to be happy. It works though. Just never give up. Never, never, never give in to it.

Good luck and God Bless!