Possibly Switching Daycares @ 2, Terrified Mom

I say, move her. She will have a hard time the first week or so, and then will settle in. She will make new friends, and you can still invite her other friends over for play dates, if you think its important.

To me, its more important that you spend less time commuting and more time with her, than that she stay at the same daycare until she is ready for kinder.

I am all for convenience. I'm sure she will be fine if you move her to another great school closer to you. She sounds well adjusted and happy, it may take a week or so for her to feel comfortable with the transition to a new school. But think of the time/money you will save with the gas and commute, and you will get to have more time to enjoy with her in the mornings and evenings.

The first daycare that my daughter was in was fantastic. I loved the teachers, my daughter had some great friends and I was really attached to the parents. Unfortunately we moved an hour away and needed to change daycares for commuting reasons. I had a panic attack every night for about 3 nights because I couldn't find one I liked as much and I'm convinced now that it was because it was a new experience. After we switched it was much better than I had imagined. She was 18 months at the time and adjusted within 2 days. She was scared and nervous because of new people and new places but she within a week she was running to play as soon as we got there. I didn't have any of the communication issues or teacher issues you had. We left strictly because of distance. I think she will bounce back just fine. I think you need to weigh more heavily into the fact that she will get to spend more time with you. I love our current daycare just as much as I loved our older daycare.

okay- take a deep breath...

1. if there is a high turnover rate at a Montessori school - that is a red flag..they are usually paid fairly well and take care of their employees...so there may be something there...

2. before you switch do a good review of who you want to change to. Ask questions about turnover, ask about schedules, routine, etc. get as much in writing as you can.

3. with gas prices the way they are - i don't blame you for wanting to switch...

4. if you stress, she will stress. if you freak, she will freak...let her help you make the decision to move - yes, she's only 2 - however, she can still verbalize to you what she wants...take her the place you are considering - with a HAPPY SMILE and EXCITED and see how she reacts...

The daycare provider in me wants to believe it's very, VERY hard. But since this is a school and not an in-home caregiver, I doubt very much that it matters all that much. I'll never forget coming on here and reading about how hard it was for one of my own charges to move to the new caregiver. The parents had moved for stupid reasons and the child was thrown into a huge tizzy because of it. But you know what? She survived and they ended up liking the new place. That's life. I can't win them all. Because your little one has only been there 4 months and she's probably nearing an age to move to a new room anyway, I'd say this is a good time to do it if you will do it anyway. Rip the bandaid off fast :)

All good answers here, so I haven't much to add, but I do know that your own attitude about the change will influence your daughter, even at the tender age of 2. You have 2 very valid reasons to make the change, so accentuate the positive and let your daughter see how happy this change of daycare will be for you, which will undoubtedly help her feel secure in the move. Is there another Montessori location closer to your work? Or should you look for a facility closer to Home, so the drive to work will be more relaxing? Hmmm. What a great age for making new friends, and communication with the caregivers and center's director is very important, afterall, this is Your child and you naturally want what's best for her too!

Personally, I think that it would be worth it to change schools, just because at this age they really need as much time with their parents as possible. Your reason--because you want more time with her in the evenings--is, to me, a good enough reason to change. Plus you have a few more reasons, so I think you're fine in changing schools. She's only two; kids at this age adjust pretty quickly and will make new friends easily.

Although as for the high turnover, that was the case for the daycare I used to work for. So many teachers were hired and left, just because the pay was terrible and the teachers were getting no support as far as supplies needed to follow the curriculum. I'm not sure if it's like this at all daycares, but it might be. Anyway, good luck!

You're not selfish for changing daycares to better suit your family's needs! The first week will be tough, but she'll be fine. We had to switch when my son was 1 and now he loves it! Two years later... time for preschool and I have no doubt that after a week, he'll love his "big boy school" too!

We worry more than we need to b/c we're moms and that's just what we do. She'll be fine- just let the new provider know ahead of time about her anxiety and reluctance so they can adjust accordingly!

Whatever your decision, just know your daughter "feeds" off of your emotions and will likely mimic. If you act hesitant and scared, so will she.

I like to thing of change in a child's life as positive. After all, we all have to learn to be adaptable.

If you decide to change, take her there once for a tour to meet her teacher and new classmates. Then drive by many times, saying "Look! There's your new school! You are going to have SO much fun!"

My son is almost 3 and I'm switching him. I love his current Montessori but wanted christian and structured environment. I've driven him by his new school so many times he loves to point and yell "My school!!!" And I tell him that he will get to go there and have fun soon. Now he's full of positive anticipation.

Good luck!

I've just applied for a job that would mean putting our 2 year old in daycare. I think I've decided on the one closest to us. I've heard great things about it, but it is not near the job. However, he would be in daycare with kids he will go to school with. His older brother went to a preschool in a neighboring town. He loved it and it was a great school for him, but now he will be starting kindergarten and not know anyone.

I know she knows this kids better where she is, but I don't think you need to worry too much about her "friends." They don't really make friends at that age. If you're thinking about changing anyway, this might be a good time to think about finding one with a lot of future schoolmates. She's going to have to meet those kids at some point, and if you do it now you won't have to do it again when she's 5. Just a thought!

Your child will adapt. Just think of all the new toys she will get to play with. We switched my daughter at 2 because I didn't think the curriculum was structured enough. We switched again at 5 because they didn't have a Kinder program (wasn't age eligible for public). My child always did just fine. Take her a few times to the new school during story time and/or playground time. Ours always allowed this. Made all the difference. She starts public K this year and have never regretted switching schools to meet her needs.

I think if you can find a daycare closer to you that has the features you desire more (consistency in teachers/longer time period (like a year)) in each class, you and your daughter will both be happier.

My 3 year old actually transitions very well, thankfully. She just transitioned into a new class and got used to a new teacher, but then the new teacher quit and she got another new teacher. Through it all, my daughter has been awesome. But, I think they want to move her up again in the Fall and I am going to ask them to leave her where she is. I think they need some stability to learn and grow.

Good luck!
L.

Might consider an in home daycare. Staff won't be rotating, she won't be moving to another group just because she gets older.

But the education she receives might not be state of the art. Some home daycares provide preschool curriculum and others play it more by ear.

In my experience, the transitions are typically once a year. Every six months seems excessive. I would go ahead a change her now. Get contact info on a few of her friends and set up some play dates.