Possible Postpartum Depression

Hey A.,
yes i had the baby blues for a little while after my daughter was born too. you need to get out of the house!!! go to the mall with the stroller and walk. dont buy any thing just walk around. make sure both girls are dressed very nice. you will feel better people will come up to you and talk about how cute you children are, how old, etc..... i found that helped me a great deal. if you have family around have some one come over and stay with you for a day or two. if they take care of the 1 year old for you it will become easier to care for the new born. have girl freinds come over just to hang out. if it continues go to your dr. right away, it can become very bad.
there are books out there that can help you cop with have 2 children that are very young. my sister in-law gave me a book called Becoming baby wise, becoming toddler wise, there is a whole buntch of them. they are great. getting the kids on you schedule makes life sooo much better. remember they came to your house no you to thiers. your not sleeping becuase you dont have them trained. my daughter wakes at
8am i change her diper, she is nurses a little bit and eats breakfast
9-9:30 she gets to watch a video
9:30-10 she plays with her toys(free play)
10-12 she takes a nap
12-12:30 change diper, lunch
12:30-1 i play with her to teach her colors, shapes.....
1-1:30 she has free play
1:30-2 watch video
2-3 nap
3-3:30 change diper, eat snack
3:30-4 free play
4-4:30 we clean up and i teach her abc's, what ever i am in th mood for.
4:30-5 dinner making time we do it together, i talk to her about every thing i am doing
5-5:30 quiet time we read a book or snuggle, what ever keeps her quiet for daddy to relax
5:30-6:30 we play together just for fun, what ever we want to chase her round the house....
6:30pm eats dinner
7 she is done, then it is bath time
7:30 dressed for bed i nurse her alittle bit
8:00 i lay her down in her bed and she goes to sleep. some times she will wake up in the middle of the night(11-12am) but she is 13 months old.
this is not one of those oh good it is 10:00 you hve to have your nap right nowwwwww. beibg alittle late is okay, it is not set in stone.
if you have both take a nap at the same it in the morning you can take a nap too. then in the afternoon when they nap you can either take another nap or get some things done around the house. that way you arent so worn down.
this is what i did some of it may work for you some may not. but it is some were to start from. get those books they can really help, they helped me.
i am by no means an organized person. but i want what is best for my child. and she is a very happy child. she doesnt give me a fuss when i put her down for a nap or to bed. children need structure, it makes them feel safe, give them soemthing to rely on.
i work from home so when i say it is a challenge i mean it. but the other day my daughter picked up a circle when i asked her which one is the circle. so i know that all of the work that i do with her is paying off.
being over whelmed is normal when you have more than 1 child under 5. my mother raised 5 kid all of us 2 years apart. i think she was crazy, but she did it. that is 5 kids in 10 years.
when i first had Gillian (my duaghter) her father was still not sure that he wanted to be involved. i had a really hard time with that. i cried for the first month after she was born. but only when she was sleep. i didnt want her to see how upset i was. if you are unhappy they will be unhappy. smile even if it is hard. if you need some help you can email me any time. a good friend is worth their weight in gold.
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Hi A. - After the birth of my daughter, who is named A., I suffered from PPD. I didn't recognize the signs but my husband did and made an appt with the OB for me right away. Like one of the other ladies who responded, I was perscribed an anti-depressant that made me feel like a person again and allowed me to interact with my daughter, the way I always dreamed I would. After doing research, my symptoms were more akin to post-partum anxiety, which is a form of PPD. Basically, I was so freaked out that something would happen to my baby that I was unable to bond with her. I was treating her like an inanimate object and wasn't seeing this creature as mine, if that makes any sense. I didnt cry all the time like some others but I definitely wasn't happy when I should have been.

I think what is most important here is that you have recognized something is going on inside you and you know can do something about it. Along with the anti-depressant meds, I found a therapist in Coral Springs who specializes in PPD. She was extremely supportive and helpful! I also suggest joining a mommy-me class to give you the opportunity to meet other moms who can listen and share their experiences. The Mailman Segal Institute at Nova University is fabulous and they offer your 1st semester (13 wks) free once your baby is 6 wks old. If that isn't close to you, look into other things in your area.

Hope this helps!

Most woman go throught this. Some are just more aware than others. Try using a natural balancing cream. I use it, my 18 yr old daughter who suffers PMS uses it and you will feel like a new person in a few weeks. I recommend Prolief and you can find it:

www.J..myabonne.com

click shop online
click natural balancing cream

If you have any questions let me know.

A.:
I can guarantee that nearly 100% of the moms on the board would be feeling exactly the way you are in your situation. My kids are nearly 2.5 years apart, and I was TOTALLY overwhelmed until at least 6 months! (now my 2nd is 2 years old, and I am only SLIGHTLY overwhlemed).
GO EASY ON YOURSELF! Looking back at the first difficult months for me, I can say that the pressure that I put on myself certainly made things worse. Just do what you can and try to get as much sleep as possible and enjoy those little ones. IGNORE anything that is not 100% necessary - let your house be messy, eat take out, don't return some phone calls, rewear your jeans several times! Until your little one starts sleeping a good chunk during the nite (5-6 hours) and you can do the same, just stay in that mind set. I am certain that you are doing great. The girls are lucky to have a concerned mom, and things will get easier and better. Best of luck.

Postpartum Depression is a very real and serious disorder that many women encounter...there are many ways to combat it naturally...I suggest Acupuncture and herbs as your first choice...you should see results immediately...your sense of well being should return quickly. Also, massage and aromatherapy are wonderful and will help you and your hormones return to normal and give you a renewed sencse of well being...I am a mom of three...a five year old daughter, a three year old son and a 7 week old daughter...I am also a midwife, massage therapist and soon to be acupuncture physician...you can contact me for more info and for refrences if you would like @ ###-###-####

A. honey hang in there. I have 2 children a year and 11 days apart and it's NOT EASY!!!!!!!!! I know what your going through and it does get better. What I can say to you right now is this: You are winning the Postpardum battle just recognizing that you have these feelings and speaking them out loud. I carried these emotions deep in my heart and soul for 2 1/2 years. I thought there was something wrong with me for having such thoughts. You can do it. You really need a support group or a special child friendly friend that can come get you and the babies out of the house, take a walk around the mall, have lunch, go get yourself a pedicure. It's going to work out. I am here to talk if you need me. I understand how crippling these feelings are. Chin up...most importantly talk to your husband, and your Doctor. Yoga tapes help. If you need to talk I'm here. I was all alone going through this, my husband looked at me like I was crazy when I tried to explain my feelings. Men don't get it. My husband blocked the news and lifetime channels and thought that was fixing the problem....

Hi. Good for you for reaching out! I suggest you see your doctor immediately and stop suffering. I suffer from this as well and Io suffered through my first pregnancy and now with my second, I ran to the doctor because I just couldn't deal. I am on antidepressants and they actually work. I am on zoloft, but your doctor can send you in the right direction. Good luck and don't suffer through this beautiful, precious time. Seek medical help.

Hi A.,
It is important to talk to your dr. about this and possibly consider the option of seeing a therapist. Equally important is the support you have from your spouse and family members and friends. What helped me a lot was joining a gym. Seek your dr.s approval first.
Hope this helps you. Good luck.

I had a little bit of the baby blues, but it didn't progress any further. Postpartum is common and VERY normal. What you are feeling has been felt by many other women, and your doctor can help you. Don't wait for your next check up. Call your ob/gyn tomorrow and let them know how you are feeling. They can help you to start to feel like yourself again.

I have never been through this problem...but I just wanted to tell you t ostay strong and get through it. I can imagine what it feels like and im sure it must be horrible. I know you dont know me, bu if you really need someone to talk to...I am on my computer a lot and will always listen.

Good Luck!!
J.

P.S- My daughter is only 15 months and i am 5 months pregnant right now...so I am very nervous when this new baby is going to arrive...I havent even had her yet and i constantly worry about how hard it is going to be to have to young children that want and need all of your attention...sometimes now I get so frustrated with my daughter because she is still such a young baby...she is 15 months and still doesnt walk...so im carrying her everywhere and hate when I dont get sleep...my husband helps out as much as he can...but only so much because he works. Just hang in there, maybe see a doctor if it doesnt go away and im sure you will be able to get through it.

Hi A., I have a daughter who is now 13 months old and I had PPD. I was very surprised when I realized I had it because I normally do not get depressed at all. I felt like I was tired all of the time and was almost like a robot doing waht I had to do. When I went back to work full time, I didn't want to work and just felt like crying all the time. I made an appointment with my OB/GYN and told her how I was feeling and she gave me a prescription that made me feel absolutely normal again. I think you should talk to your OB/GYN as soon as possible. I didn't go until 7 months after giving birth and was so miserable wasting all that time with my baby. If you have any other questions, feel free to e-mail me. Good luck!

K.

Hi A.,

You need to talk to your OB/GYN, they can help with your situation and feelings. There is help you can receive and should. You don't want to feel like this forever and you won't. Please get the help you need before it's too late

I am so sorry you are feeling so hopeless, but please know that you will not feel like this forever! Please consider seeking professional help from a therapist and possibly a psychiatrist for medication that may help you through this period. I wish I knew of some good ones to recommend to you but, I am new to the area. Perhaps some other women will offer suggestions for reputable and caring mental health caregivers.

Hi A.,
Being around other "new moms" and finding some relaxation techniques, along with some exercise for you can help the hormones balance. Come join us for some classes if you can to be with baby (through active crawling) for support & fun.

Prenatal Plus - Yoga
D. Geymayr, R.Y.T., HBCE, CD, CLD
www.prenatalplusyoga.com
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Dear A.,

I had very bad postpartum with both of my children. My OB was a wonderful man, yep a man, who helped me greatly. He prescribed (sp?) an anti-depressant for me. It helped so much. I know there is still a lot of stigma attached to these medicines, but postpartum is too serious not to take it.

The first time my doctor gave me Zoloft. Everyone is different in their reactions, but it made me feel nothing...not happy, not sad, just nothing which after the extreme emotions I had been feeling, was very scary. He then prescibed another drug and it worked like a dream. It relieved my anxiety and helped me take joy in my children again.

You did not make a mistake! You have two great children and I am sure you are a great mom. You just need a little help getting through the hormone nightmare we go through after having a baby.

Talk to your OB. If they won't help, I have a wonderful doctor in Boca who will help you. Please feel free to contact me if you want his name.

Stay strong, a year from now you will help someone else going through these exact feeling.

Pam

My daughter is 15 months and i am still going through ppd. Its tough and the docs could not give me a prescription for anything to help. My advice to you is try to get out and vent as much as possible or take up a new hobby that is not overwhelming. Have your husband take the two kids for a day and just relax, get a facial, your nails done etc. My main issue was weight gain and self loathing. So i had to do something to help myself so that others ould help me also. One thing to remember!! You are not alone!!!

Hi, A. --

I've never had children, so I cannot address "post-partum" depression. However, I live with depression, and have done so for 20 years. My advice? GET PROFESSIONAL HELP. There are good reasons for you to feel overwhelmed -- you've just had back-to-back babies, and aren't even sure you're doing the right things for the elder, never mind the newbie. Don't lose heart -- don't beat up on yourself -- get yourself an appointment with a psychiatrist, who can evaluate the severity of your symptoms and prescribe something to help you until (I hope) the depression passes. I also urge you to engage in counseling/therapy, because the emotions involved in becoming a new mother may have triggered some old issues you're not fully aware of. Having done this twice, I can vouch that having someone who is willing to listen to you and who will ask you the right questions is invaluable -- self-knowledge is crucial to finding ways to live a healthier, happier life. Last, but not least, seek out a support group of other new mothers or simply of women about your age, some of whom no doubt have children as well. Don't cloister yourself with your children; you have needs they cannot fulfill, no matter how much you love them. They need you to take care of yourself, too. (So does hubby -- don't forget about him, either!)

Dear A.:
I have 3 children. The first two in New York with all the help in the world. My third, all alone here in South Florida, my husband couldn't even go with me to the OB/GYN because he had just started a new job....talk about depression. I thought that if I got myself into a car accident, I can escape, be in a hospital room and not have to deal with "my life" with children. Make an appointment with your OB/GYN. There is an excellent resource for post-pardon depression out of Coral Springs. It was a bit of a drive but I found once I went to the few appointments I started to see some improvement. This is the best gift you can give to yourself first then to your kids. I will look for the card and send you another message.

Hi A.,

When I first had my son I was depressed, cried a lot, thought "what did I get myself into" and felt guilty about all the above.. I think it's "very" normal to go through these emotions. It's a HUGE adjustment... Being on little too no sleep can do that to a person.. I felt like a zombie for awhile until I actually hired someone to come in an help me when my son was 3 weeks old. I was overwhelmed with being on no sleep and having to take care of a child all day. To top it off my son became colicy and cried all the time.... If you can, take a break for an hour. Have someone come over and watch the kids while you go out to lunch/dinner with a friend/your husband... YOU NEED YOU TIME!!! I'm sorry that your going through this but I promise it gets better.. I never needed to get on medication (the hired help became my medication) but if you need to get on something, there's nothing wrong with that..... Good luck and let me know if you want to talk.. I was there once!

I think that the hardest part about post-partum deppresion is to admit that you have it, and you did. So the next step is to talk to your doctor about it, it is common and there's no shame in talking about it, they can help you and you will get through it, just be patient and take it slow. Babies are a joy but they do tire you out so much and having 2 babies has to be overwhelming. My advice to you is to rest whenever possible, everyone told me to rest and I never did and when you least expect it the lack of sleep gets to you, don't be shy about asking for help to anyone, family, friends, neighbors, they are not going trough it but they do understand.

You need to get an appointment with your gynecologist so he or she can evaluate you and if needed give you medication. They know the signs and symptoms it is very important to see your doctor instead of self diagnosis,you can not fix this without help from a professional. Make notes to give to the doctor like sleeping pattern your feeding new born and 1 year old. You should have support with the girls so you can get needed sleep.

N.