Please Share How Long You Waited to Try Again....

Updated on August 04, 2009
G.W. asks from Clermont, FL
6 answers

Hi Ladies,

I'm asking for a friend who just had her first miscarriage about a week ago...it was pretty early in the pregnancy but still she's very sad, disappointed and even angry. Her doctor has recommended a two cycle wait but she feels like she just can't wait that long to try again. She's a nurse (pediatric) so I'm sure in her head she understands all the medical reasons but for those of you who have had the unfortunate experience of a miscarriage, I'm sure you'd all agree it's a matter of the heart, too. I told her I'd put this out there for her so I'm sure she'd appreciate all your advice, experience and info.
Thanks!

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So What Happened?

On behalf of my friend, thanks for sharing your personal stories with your miscarriages. I know she will appreciate reading the different perspectives. I can see that this was painful for each of you and I'm very sorry that each of you have had these losses...it was very selfless of you to share so that my special friend could be encouraged to stay strong while she tries again very soon!

More Answers

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V.T.

answers from Dallas on

I had the same thing happen to me. I didn't have a D&C, so I was able to try again pretty soon. I went to a Collaborative Practice and saw a different doctor each time. The first doctor told me to wait 3 cycles, but the next time I went it, the doctor told me that if my first cycle after the miscarriage was normal and on time, than I could start right away after that, and I did. The dr. that told me 3 cycles was older and the doctor who told me one was younger. I think 10 different docs would have 10 different answers.

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R.E.

answers from Dallas on

I am so sorry to hear your friend is going through this. I've been there, so I know exactly how she is feeling. I had one last August at 10 weeks of pregnancy. The doctor told me to wait 3 cycles. So, we did. I got pregnant right away and promptly lost the baby at 5 weeks. We didn't wait after that one and got pregnant after one cycle. I lost that baby in March at 8 weeks. I do not have any medical reason this happened either. I have already had 2 children with no problems conceiving or maintaining the pregnancy. My doctor told me that you can try again as soon as you lose a baby; however, the risk of miscarriage if you don't wait is 50% instead of the usual 20-25%. My neighbor had a miscarriage last September at about the same gestation I was, and she just gave birth last month. I don't believe they waited at all.

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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

First I am so sorry for your friend. I had an early miscarriage at 6 wks. It was the hardest thing I have ever been through. I did some research and 90% of first time pregnancys end in miscarriage. Most people just don't know they had one because it happens during their normal cycle. Also when she gets pregnant the 2nd time around her chances of a repeat miscarriage are very low. I took some comfort in knowing the medical facts. Having friends to talk to who had gone through the same thing helped a lot too. My Dr. told me to wait one cycle and then we could try. I miscarried in early March, had my cycle in early April, and was pregnant by the end of April but found out in May. God is good his timing is perfect and I know it will happen for her :)

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W.K.

answers from Dallas on

Tell your friend how sorry I am that she lost her baby. I had a miscarriage 3 years ago at the end of July. My doctor suggested waiting a full cycle before trying again. We started trying again after that first full cycle and got pregnant again the second month of trying. Our little girl just turned 2 in June. For me the hardest thing of trying/getting pregnant again was the fear that I would have another miscarriage. I had to do lots of praying through that pregnancy. God bless your friend.

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J.D.

answers from Dallas on

It really depends on how far along she was and if she had have a D&C. If she was less than 6 weeks and passed it on her own, then waiting one cycle is best. Otherwise, waiting two cycles would be better. I highly recommend she get the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility and start tracking her cycles and watching her temps and cervical fluid. Not only will it help her achieve pregnancy, but it can also help her understand any repeat losses if they occur.

I have had 7 m/c's. I have one beautiful baby girl for whom I went to the fertility dr to achieve. I got pregnant last month and lost it at 5 weeks. Since it was not that far along, I passed it on my own, and I didn't bleed that much. It is fine for me to try again this month. I know that my lining was not thick enough to carry the pregnancy based on the fact I bled very little for 3 days. I know how to increase this, so I am taking the supplements now and will probably wait one cycle before I try again just to make sure.

I'm so sorry for her loss. If she needs someone to talk to.. send me a note. I'm fairly an expert at the charting thing.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

I am so sorry to hear that she went through this it is very hard no matter how far along you are. I was told by my doctor to wait 3 cyles. I waited the three cycles and got pregnant a month later. I would suggest she waits it took me a at least two cycles to get back on track. I had the miscarriage then a few weeks later had a cycle then another one two weeks later. Finally by the third month things were back to normal. I know how hard it can be to wait, but it is better for her body. Best of luck to her!

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