Picky Eater Already??? How Do I Get Him to Eat Everything??

You do have to remember he is only 13 months old and to be honest I think you are stressing a little too much. My son is two and is very picky, very random as to how much he eats and if he eats at all. He has his great eating days and his bad eating days . . . I have come to realize he will eat when he is hungry and in time will learn to eat at the dinner table with the rest of us - LOL! Don't stress and worry so much. Continue to try different foods, cut them up with cookie cutters, give him dippers if he can eat items such as carrots. Make food fun and at the same time healthy. I stressed for too long and realized he eats healthy most of the time and gets what he needs when he needs it.

For an infant, often a few bites is a serving. I would just start feeding him a little bit of everything you are eating. Most infants love to eat whatever is on the parent's plate. I would drop the pre-made 'baby food' altogether. Try them - they certainly don't taste like food to M..

If he is hungry and you put 1-2 tsp of 3-4 things on his plate - he will start eating. Especially if he can use his hands (yes it's messy but it's how they learn). So for example - at breakfast at that age DS might have 1 Tbs of oatmeal, 1/2-1 mashed banana and 1-2 Tbs of mashed avocado. If he ate something and clearly wanted more, we would give it to him. For lunch his plate might have - slightly mashed chick peas, a vegetable (steamed broccoli, carrots, sweet potatoes, green peas, corn), plain yogurt (with or without fresh fruit mixed in) and either a second vegetable or fruit. For dinner - whatever we were eating - a typical day - grilled salmon (flaked for him), asparagus, brown rice & strawberries.

For texture - experiment. He may do better with coarsely chopped foods not fine purees at this point. He may also do better with soft foods cut into bits he can handle with his fingers. Also there is no reason at all to give him juice - it is empty sugar calories and may in fact distract him from eating real food.

Current research shows that the experimentation with food that kids do as infants is HUGELY important in their later food habits (and yes lots of people who want you to feel better - including pediatricians - will just tell you not to worry about it). Also that babies need to try the same thing many times before they make a final decision about it. A baby may try carrots 12-16 times before making a final decision that they are ok. (of course babies can decide about ice cream with one taste). Also - try cooking foods different ways - lots of babies like spicy food. Steaming is easy but certainly not the only way to make veggies.

This is a nerve-wracking problem for most parents at some point with at least one of their children. A neighbor child couldn't be convinced to eat a single vegetable for about three years, and only one or two types of fruit. On the advice of a pediatric nutritionist, his parents backed off completely on pushing foods at him, and quietly but visibly enjoyed their own more varied diets at every meal. In a matter of months he was asking to try their some of their foods, and by the time he was six, he would independently order salads for lunch or dinner in a restaurant.

I have known generations of parents with similar experiences. Once they stopped urging/forcing food at their children, the kids had a new freedom to become curious about what they were missing. To M., that indicates that a battle of wills is at the root of their food rejections. Your own story of childhood food preferences is telling. You simply can not get over some of your dislikes. Totally normal – not an indication that there's anything wrong with you or your food preferences.

There are children who have trouble swallowing or have a strong gag reflex, which sounds like the case with your child. There are many, many kids who find certain textures revolting and many flavors off-putting, which also sounds like your son. All of us have noticed that when we feel tense or upset, appetite disappears, so it's important to keep table time relaxed and happy. And it's also SO common that it's normal that toddlers, even those who acquired a variety of foods early on, to withdraw and eat only from a very narrow selection of foods. Some researchers believe this is nature's way of protecting curious kids from poisoning themselves on attractive berries or other stuff they find lying around.

These challenges, which he certainly didn't ask to be burdened with, have probably made your little guy's attraction to food pretty sketchy. Trying to force him past those difficulties is not likely to help, but rather to make him even more resistant. And there are studies showing that too much attempted parental control over food can result in dangerous eating disorders later in life. Food remains a battlefield, but it has become a less conscious and controllable process for the child. I'd want to do some more research of my own if I were in your position. For example, when I google "causes, eating disorders," the very first scholarly essay, heavily footnoted, states that eating-disordered families are "enmeshed, intrusive, and negating of the patient's emotions needs, or overly concerned with parenting."

Of course, from a concerned parents' perspective, "good parenting" can seem to require intensive interventions. But from the child's perspective, he may experience this as leaving him too little space to choose according to his needs, which are emotional as well as physical.

As incomplete as it seems to you, your son's food choices probably represent a fairly balanced selection of foods. Will he eat a chewable multivitamin? If so, I think I'd take a few deep breaths, trust that my son will eventually want to try new foods, and be sure that what he does eat now is as nutritious and high-quality as possible – real foods and not processed ones. I'd also suggest letting him graze – putting out a small bowl of attractively arranged veggies, fruits, nut butter, yogurt for dipping, small squares of omelet, a whole-grain cracker. In other words, a small variety of appealing foods that he is NOT required to eat, but they are available if he wants to try.

Keep in mind that his stomach is only as big as his fist, and some days toddlers seem to have no appetite at all, and he doesn't really need much food right now. I'll bet he'll very gradually forget this struggle when he becomes convinced you have stopped trying to "make" him. Usually by late toddlerhood, a child does start voluntarily expanding his food choices. But they won't if food has become a symbol of personal autonomy and control.

Well start with what he likes. You say he comes home hungry, so what does he eat?
From there find things that are similar in taste or texture and just keep offering. You say that he will take a few bites and then refuse, that is a great start! Don't worry about him not eating an entire serving of something, just trying something new is a great step.
One problem if you start kids out on commercial baby food is that they develop a taste for bland, smooth, sweet purees and that habit is hard to break.
Offer him something that he likes every day and add something new, or something that he thinks he does not like. Just leave it there on the table, no force. Most kids will first start liking a new food after it has been offered for 30+ times! Just be patient.
Good luck.

He's still an infant. Keep trying new things on his plate from your plate in tiny bite size pieces.
Feed him what he will eat: baby food, juice, smoothies etc .
Try to give tiny pieces of everything you eat (keeping in mind things not to give infants per your ped).
My baby had a huge gag reflex for a long time. Now he will try more things.
If he doesn't like it, I don't force him or stress about it. If he is gaining weight that is good. Mine gained weight yet he's lean like his father.
Keep trying different foods.
Also, since he's at daycare, send him with all the things you know HE WILL EAT so he's not hungry all day at daycare and ravenous by the time he gets home.
Give yourself a break. Picky eating is not a biological trait that is passed on. It's learned. He WILL DEVELOP and change. He's still young.

Ok, relax! The number one rule here is that kids will not starve themselves. If he is hungry, he will eat. I noticed several times you said that he will stop eating after a few bites. At this age, a few bites is a full serving so he might actually be full. Try to think of a few table foods that he does like and that he can eat with his hands, put those in front of him with a drink, sit down next to him and have a meal together. See what he does. When he's done eating, he's done eating. No worries, just let him play.

My sons wanted table food very early (8 or 9 months), so my experience is different. For both of them, at this age, I found what worked the best was to ditch the high chair and use a booster seat at the table. I made a very large plate of food for myself (all things that they could safely eat) and sat down next to them. Then I put pieces of food in front of them. A little of this, a little of that. When they at the food, I put more in front of them. When they started to whine, try to climb out or throw food I took that to mean they were done. I helped them out and let them play. If they were hungry again later, I offered them more food. This happened every two hours or so until bedtime.

I think the most important thing for you to do is try to relax, keep offering foods and trust him. He will eat if he's hungry and not eat if he's full. If you are able to relax, so will he. Right now, you're making food into a source of great stress, and that's not helping anyone.

My sister is going through this with her son, who is now 20 months old. It got so bad that he is now going to a Healthy Eating Clinic for kids. It was recommended by her pediatrician. My sister waited too long to mention his eating trouble to the pediatrician, and it wasn't until his weight was really low, that the pediatrician brought it up. It maybe that your son is a picky eater, and I do advice being constistant with his eating and try not to give to many options at meal time, but it maybe something more serious so I would talk to your pediatrician.

My son did not get off of baby foods until 16 months, which is also when he started walking. Before then he was ahead in verbal skills but behind in gross motor, including feeding and being able to tolerate different textures. For him it was about texture more than taste. But by 18 mo he ate everything we did for supper, except stuff that was spicy...he would pcik that out on his own. This lasted until he was 4, then he got much pickier. I still will not make him a different meal from what we are all having. He must have at least 2 bites of everything we are eating. Then if there is one item he likes alot he can fill up on that. If there is nothing he likes he can have fruit, veggies or yogurt but not sweets. Over the years he has begun to like more food items again. Be patient, but focus on not giving into making him his own meal every night of the "kid" food (not baby food, I"m talking pizza, chicken nuggets, mac & ch, etc) he eats or you'll be stuck in that mode for a long time. And don't give into too many sweets if they won't eat healthy stuff. Good luck!

You just described my 13 month old!! My son seems to want to eat what we eat and no baby food. He does like rice cereal with rice milk so I give him a little bit of what we eat and then some cereal and breast milk. He doesn't even want to eat our food if I blend it up. He just wants it like we eat it which is harder at his age. I make him eat at least one or two bites of everything because sometimes they get used to certain textures and tastes. I hope that helps. Good luck!

First of all have you contacted his pediatrician, if not I would definitely ask for advice there.

Now I am no expert but I do think your being too hard on yourself. If your son is picky its not because you didn't feed him soon enough.

If he is happy with the jar food continue that while still trying to give him table foods. Eventually he will eat it.

Also, its VERY common for all babies to slow down in weight gain at this age, so I wouldn't worry about this unless your pediatrician seems concerned.

Don't worry so much. He is normal, babies really aren't supposed to eat much table food until after a year of age. He is going to watch those kids eat and eventually he'll get it and start eating whatever he likes.

First of all, you NEED to relax. My daughter started out pretty picky, but now I can at least get her to try things.

He's over a yr old... LET him feed himself. He may be rebelling because he wants that independance. He'll eat if he gets hungry enough. 2 pediatricians that I have trusted told M., 'If they want to eat a PB&J for 3 meals a day for the next year, let em. They'll get sick of it and try something new. That's what chewable vitamins are for.'

As far as your husband is concerned, he's a grown @ss man. He needs to get over his issues. If not, he can fend for himself!!!

ETA- With both of my kids, I showed them that I didn't have an issue with eating their food... That usually got them to eat the babyfood/toddler meals. We 'shared'.

First of all, when you introduce food and how you introduce them has nothing to do with if your child is picky or not. My son loved fruits and veggie purrees. He ate everything I gave him. He was ok with Stage 3 foods but that is when the trouble started. He would eat things with 1 ingredient, lots of fruit, some veggies. He is 3 and he still wont eat rice, pasta, soup, anything with mixed textures and ingredients. Now that he goes to school they expose him to different foods many many times and he sees the other kids eating it. He also has some mild sensory processing issues which may be why your son is gagging and not eating what the other kids are eating. Read up on sensory processing, it can be mild (food issues, textures) to severe. It may apply or may not, could give you some ideas. Just keep offering and don't sneak up on him or force him, trust M., it doesn't work. If he can even get him to smell or lick the food first, that is a good first step.

Hi my daughter had the same problem!! She wouldn't eat solid nor baby food. But We did couple of things when she was around 11 months, she's now 14 months. We started her at daycare at 11 months and seeing her friend eat everyday certainy got her interested at food, and we started feeding her baby Zantac, which improved her reflux a lot. And we cut out the formula totally. So I don't what we did right but she's eating great now, which is such a big relieve for us. I hope my reply would help cuz your son sounded just like my daughter couple months ago, and her dad has bad reflux problem on his side of the family, and on top of it he's got texture problem too. Also my daughter was breastfed til 7 and half month.

Also may be you can try grind up some table food and see how he like it too if it's a texture problem.

A.