Petrified of Germs at Daycares

I was scared also....that is why I decided to start me own little caregiving job at my home. I watch about 5 kids total, and love it.....I can determine who is allowed to come and who is not on whether they are well or not. I do not think that you are nuts at all!!!! What I do think is that she needs to devleop her imune system now instead of later. I think that it is great that you are still breast feeding her. That makes me smile

Have you thought of a home daycare or a nanny? I watch children in my home and there are no more then 4 kids at one time. Less kids means less germs. Kids will get colds though, its a part of life. Unless you put her in a bubble she might just get sick someday. Breastfeeding helps her though mama :)
Good job!

Have you thought of trying to get a nanny? I'm a mom of 3 little boys. Fortunately I don't need to go back to work, but always thought I would get a nanny if I did because I've heard kids are sick all the time when in daycare. Either that or maybe a daycare someone has out of their home with fewer kids (lessening the likelihood one would be sick).

K.,
There are definitely positives and negatives to different types of childcare. My oldest (BF until 27 months) never got sick in the first 2 daycares (we moved) and he started in daycare part-time at 6 weeks old. The first day in the 3rd daycare (moved again) he got very sick. In the 6 months we had him there he had hand/foot/mouth and strep TWICE, a 7 day diarrhea illness, and several bouts of other more general illnesses. I don't believe in the 'germs/immunity' theory of daycares now...I believe that the daycare's policies and how well they enforce them are what makes a difference in the type and frequency of illnesses the children get. After we switched him because of the onslaught of illnesses and after speaking to the owner several times regarding basic handwashing by the staff and kids, he stopped getting sick immediately. So...my criteria for daycares, whether institutional or private (the positive experiences above came from both), or even a person's home daycare are: (1) GLOVES absolutely necessary for all diaper changes (2) Wash employee AND child's hands after each diaper change, dry with paper towels (note - if you can't find the paper towels, neither can the staff) (3) All surfaces wiped down daily, with food surfaces wiped down after each snack/meal or activity (4) Strict policy on no sick kids allowed, not bowing to parents' insistence that they need to work - the other children are there for a reason too and it's not fair that other parents have to take off work when their children get sick from others. (5) Some kind of sanitation procedure for toys, especially for babies and toddlers putting toys in their mouths; and the toy goes in the 'dirty bin' after a child puts it in it's mouth and doesn't come out until it goes through the sanitizer.

There are many more things I look for after these are ruled in (obviously kids crying and not being attended to appropriately would make me walk out before I even asked the above questions.) And it may seem like a lot BUT the daycares where my son didn't get sick all did this so it is not too much to ask or do. A home daycare should have the same procedures.

Good luck!

D.

.

Hey, K.!
Congratulations for breast feeding for so long and for your healthy little girl! Please understand, that germs are not your enemy. Every illness your daughter fights and overcomes at this point, strengthens her already healthy immune system. Our culture has us fighting germs and disinfecting everything, when really, we need to be armed against the natural germs in the world by being exposed to them. Your daughter will not be able to avoid germs in life! I hate it when my kids are sick, which hasn't been often-they were also nursed for a long time, but I notice, even their stuffy noses etc don't really bother them. I'm more bothered than they are, but I try not to make a big deal of it so they won't become hypochondriacs one day. Our daughter got chicken pox in Paris when she was 18 months old-somehow she hadn't been vaccinated when I thought she had. Both French and American doctors told us to be glad to get it out of the way, and that to catch it directly was even better for fighting it off in the future than the vaccine would have been. Try to relax! You're daughter is very healthy, and she will survive! You're doing a great job!
a m y

I know this sounds strange coming from a pediatric nurse, but I believe that the benefits of creating a tenacious immune system, outweigh the inconvenience of initally very frequent colds. Your daughter will be exposed to mutiple viruses in daycare and build up immunity over time. If she doesn't do it now, she will be missing a lot of school in kindergarten and first grade.

This is always a tough decision. I have worked in many daycares while my kids attended because of the fears I had of enrolling them. This is the worst time of year with germs. In most cases the kids are pretty healthy once spring rolls around. Are there any daycare centers around you with smaller classes? That would keep the germ count down.Find out what the centers cleaning policy is. Do they wash/sanitize tables chairs and toys daily or weekly? Also look into at home centers. My daughter goes to one in Somers point and she has only been sick 1 time this year. Good Luck and dont worry too much.Sounds like your doing great!

I can tell you as a teacher she will get sick, no matter what. It does't matter if she is in Daycare or in School, germs are everywhere. It is better to get her immune system up and running now, rather than when she is in Kindergarten and missing days of school.

K.,

A little advice here, if you germ proof your kids they will become sick later and it will be worse then those exposed to germs. No one wants their children to get sick but if they never are in contact with germs or get sick, they will never build up antibodies to viruses. Just relax and realize that germs are not evil, they in fact are good for future illnesses. My daughter is around germs in church nursery and in public and she has had one small cold only after getting her flu vaccine, so just relax anf allow her to be a child =)

Hi K.,
I could have written your post a year and a half ago. I too was terrified to put my 21 month old in daycare part time at that point, but I had gotten a great job and had 2 weeks to find something! I wasn't comfortable with in-home care b/c it's not as regulated so I definitely wanted a licensed daycare center. I ended up finding a wonderful place and he loves it now. He did get sick a few times at first but nothing terribly serious. I attributed that to the fact that I was still nursing (only once a day, but still). I think that helped a lot--and it at least made me feel as if I was doing everything I could. Good luck and she will be fine!
K.

Hey there. Just thought I would offer. I am a mother of two and have worked in childcare for ever 13 yrs now. I feel exactly same. When my first son was born I suddenly became aware of germs. Family members have teased me saying my house is "as clean as a hospital", haha. I quit working in centers, even the cleanest ones, because we were always sick.

We just moved into a new construction home and I turned a huge room off of our living room into a play room/classroom - we love this room and I spent much of our time in there. I love working with kids and I have been known to be highly educational when it comes to playtime. I've just started advertising myself and I cant wait to have a few kids. My home is very clean and I have everything needed for little ones. I have a jam packed resume, references, clearances, first aid training and lots of experience.

As of now, my oldest goes to kindergarten and I am home with my 1 year old. My house is clean and safe for kids - babyproofed to the max! I disinfect our entire playroom monthly, more often than that if someone is sick. My family is rarely sick and when we are its usually ear infections. If you are at all interested we can talk more, if not I wish you luck. There is nothing worse than the helpless feeling of your child sick and not a whole lot you can do. I am not online a ton right now, but if you would like to talk more your best bet would be to email me. ____@____.com.

I certainly understand your position, however....if she's been breastfed for this long, know her immune system is stronger than a child that's never been or that stopped before the end of the first year. That said, you just have to come to terms that she will be exposed to sickness, but this will also help her immune system to build resistance up to illnesses, even if she gets sick the first 6 mos. I stayed at home for the first 3 years w/ my son, then he began preschool (he's autistic and goes to a specialized school/class). I was paranoid and downright angry when he's come home sick or caught a virus, etc. I realized he has to be in the world and I can't protect him forever!! He's very healthy and we wash hands consistantly, tell him not to put his hands in his mouth or touch his face, etc. His teachers are on board as well encouraging this w/ all the kids. Just research daycares and check w/ the caregivers their sanitary conditions. Go and observe ones you might consider and see for yourself. Also see what their sick policies are. Lots of times, even at our church nursery, they won't allow a child in if they have a fever or runny nose. The child has to be fever-free for 24 hrs to attend. I think this is standard in most places. Anyhow, best of luck. It's a hard transition, but the interaction and social skills she'll learn is so valuable at 20 mos. and a couple colds and flu's will pass. Also, make sure she gets a flu-shot that's preservative-free (ask your ped.) God Bless!

During this time of year, you can pretty much count on the fact that kids are going to have colds. That being said, there is a lot that the daycare can do to help prevent the spread of germs. The center my kids go to is fanatical about cleanliness. They have hand sanitizer outside each room door, the kids are always taught to wash their hands and the rooms always look neat. Each of them have caught a little cold and cough but nothing too bad. Also, there is the school of thought that it is good to get the kids exposed to germs so it boosts their immune system. Go with your gut in choosing a day care..if the place and staff look sloppy, it is probably not the place for you. Where do you live? I would be happy to recommend the center I take my kids.

I can understand your fears...but you're worrying about something that is out of your control. Eventually she will have to start school...if not daycare then kindergarten and other children will show up to school sick. I approached it with the idea that it is better to have my duaughter exposed early and build up her immune system then later when she is in kindergarten and missing vaulable school lessons.

The other thought I had is you mentioned that at the daycare a few children looked sick. They could have a runny nose and cough from allergies - and your daughter wouldn't be catching a cold from these children.

I hope I've helped even a little

Hi K.,
I am a 36 year old mom of 3. My children range in age from 5 to 16. My 5 year old is currently in daycare part-time(3 days a week) and has been attending for 3 yearts. I can tell you that he hasn't been any sicker than my other two children who never attended daycare. I think ever child is different, some seem to have better immune systems than others. Also, you will probably want to really check out the daycare you are putting your child in. What are their Hygeine routines like? At my child's daycare, the children wash their hands quite often and the entire room, including the toys, get scrubbed every evening. Soon enough you'll be sending your child off too school, and of course you take your child out to department stores and grocery stores and to other people's houses I'm sure. I believe your child will find just as many germs there, and guess what? Sometimes you will get to share the germs together. Stop worrying, I'm sure at some point she may catch something from daycare, but she's just as likely to catch something anywhere else. I hope you think about what I've said, unfortunately we can't protect our kids from everything.

Hi K.!

I too am a fellow Germaphobe! It is perfectly normal to feel the way you do.

When my daughter was 6 months old I went back to work and she went to a daycare center. Not only was it sooooooo expensive, but during the four months there she had everything possible that you could think of. Pink eye, rotovirus, and chronic green goo running from her nose. I was so devastated and stressed out it. I was determined to stay at home with her. Fortunately, for me I found a great company that allows me to work from home and still support my family. It is truly a blessing. Let me know if I can help you work from home.

My neighbor does daycare now in her home. There is only three kids and she helps when I need her. My daughter or the other kids are never sick. But I do have a piece of mind that she has the cleanest house on the block.

If you must go back to work then unfortunately it is inevitable that she will be sick at first. Be strong and you will get through it! Good Luck!

M. L.

Boy, K., my heart to you!
My two were never sick until they hit school and then it was like Cortez and the Aztecs, they really got sick a lot. I remember the Christmas Show and one parent said she'd sent hers in with fevers because you were only allowed so many days off before you needed a doc note every absence.

I thought, "Well, now I know what we'll be doing for Christmas."
And, sure enough, they were too sick to even care about their presents, thank you very much.

Maybe there's a private person? There are lots of e mail groups in my area and people advertising they will babysit that watch just a couple of kids at a time.

Other suggestion is Children's Echinacea by Herbs for Kids. Our Giant stores carry it now. That and good Noni Juice really helped us.

Best of Luck!! One way to look at it is you are building her immune system. sigh

P.

Our third child (who came 10 years later then our older two) was born early and we were warned about the germs in daycare. When she was 13 month I put her in daycare just two days a week so I could work PT. (I thought two days would not be so bad) She had never been sick, so I thought we were in the clear. Wrong....she ended up so sick that she was in the hospital for 3-4 days. Plus needed tubes in her ears. After that we have never put her back in daycare. It was not worth it. They had to keep calling me at work anyway to come and get her. So what we do now to keep her out of daycare is i work PT from home and I work a few hours opposite of my husband and we avoid daycare all together. We have made many changes in our life financially to keep her out of daycare. we are now expecting our 4th baby and I can assure this one will be kept out of daycare. www.livegreeneasy.com

Hi K.:
I know EXACTLY how you feel. Im a 34 yo first time mom of a 17 month old and when I had to put her into day care at 6 month (part time), I felt AWFUL and the germs was a big issue for me, too. I actually brought wipes with me to wipe down the swing and other equipment when she first started and as soon as I picked her up and put her in the car, I immediately wiped her hands! But this all changed when I found the RIGHT day care. The firs one she went to, she was there 3 times and I took her out. It was total chaos, not all that clean when I REALLY looked at things and I just didnt feel comfortable leaving here there. My mommy gut was definitely kicking into high gear!!! When I found Bright Horizons in King of Prussia, EVERYTHING changed! It was super clean, very orderly and when I left her there in the AM to go to work, I felt TOTALLY FINE doing so.

Your never going to escape germs at day care, out in public, etc. My daughter has gotten colds from school but I wouldnt say she is ALWAYS sick like a lot of mothers I hear say about their kids in daycare. Its actually a good thing cause it builds up their immune system. But I know its hard to see your child sick! But I can honestly say the benefits of this day care out weigh any colds she has gotten. They have tought her so much already, she has made so many craft things for me, has friends and she likes it there. They treat her so well! There are runny noses here and there, it will never change, but I really beleive the key is finding the RIGHT daycare and things will just flow. I really believe this. I have recommended 3 people to Bright Horizons so far and they all have joined and love it there. I dont know if there is one near you but there has to be a daycare out there that you will really like an feel okay leaving your daughter there. I hope this helps and if you want any other info, feel free to write to me!
Best of luck!
K.

I am pretty nutsy about germs and dirt and stuff too, but I try to remind myself that being exposed to some is a good thing. By building their immune systems now with minor colds and coughs, you are helping her body develop the ability to fight off potentially more serious illnesses when she is older. Even the minor colds are uncomfortable for them and hard for you to see them suffer, but they really do bounce back quickly.

That said, you certainly don't want to go looking for germs either. The child care you choose should practice good preventative practices such as washing hands regularly (gentle soap and running water are really all you need - antibacterial isn't necessary and some even recommend against it) and not sharing food/ pacifiers etc. Toys should be washed regularly - especially ones that are mouthed.

Your milk will continue to help her immune system be strong too and will give her an added advantage in fighting germs - even if means she still gets a cold or two, they are likely to be less severe and she'll bounce back sooner.

Hi K., I completely understand how u feel. I will do anything I can to avoid my baby from getting sick. Have you considered the possibilty of a nanny. The financial aspects are scary but if you can afford it that is the best thing to do in terms of health issues and one to one care goes. At daycares the upper respiratory infections are I feel inevitable.
If u decide going with a nanny my friend used enanny.com but I went with a reputable nanny agency.
If u need details u are welcome to email me directly.
Good luck with everything
A.

Believe it or not, it is actually a good thing to expose your daughter to germs. Her immune system has to develope and mature gradually. As a school nurse, I can tell the kids who have not been exposed to many viruses,they miss a lot of school! It is good to get the exposure now. The normal amount of viruses that children are expected to have at your daughter's age is about 6-8 cold/cough per year. The irony in all the "germ" stuff is that studies have actually been done and prove that people who live in "dirty" environments are actually sick less often. Some doctors even recommend that you don't bath your children everyday to help the immune system get stronger on it's own. By helping to strengthen your child's immune system now she will be able to fight off nasty viruses when she is in school and exposed to EVERYTHING that the children bring to school!
It's hard to not worry about germs as a new Mom, but believe me you will do her a tremendous favor by gradually strengthening her immune system by exposing her to germs!

Hi K.. I saw your post about day care and wanted to share with you my experience. I had no choice but to return to work (in education) when my daughter was 2.5 months old. She has only gotten sick once, this last week. She sleeps well at day care and actually LOVES going. I know she is happy when I pick her up, but when we arrive in the morning, she is grinning and so excited to see her caretakers and the other children. She is almost 6 months old and is extremely verbal, curious and active. Her doctor commented on how developmentally advanced she is for her age, and i know this is because she is watching and interacting with other adults and children. Also, the research shows that children who attend day care actually build up immunity early to things that hit other children hard when they enter kindergarten. So, i guess you can see it as picking your poison, so to speak. The fact that you are still breast feeding will definitely help limit the number of times your baby gets sick. Also, I think children are more likely to get sick if they are not getting enough sleep and proper nutrition, including kids in daycare. Your daughter has probably not been sick mostly because she is sleeping and eating well, not because she is home. I think the fact that we keep our daughter on a strict sleep schedule helps keep her healthy. I would definitely be VERY picky in choosing a day care, but there are really great ones out there. My husband and I feel so lucky to be at the place we found! We love it. I hope this helps.

I hear you! I am a germ freak myself! I used to be a director of a daycare center and my daughter attended while I worked. She was pretty healthy being there, but got her first sickness withing the first week. Your child will get sick be it starting daycare now, or starting kindergarten......its inevitable, unfortunately! Continuing to breastfeed will help ALOT so keep it up! After your daughter gets adjusted to the germs you will find she will hardly get sick at all. It actually makes their immune system stronger. I since left working and had my son and am now pregnant with my third. My son has never been in childcare, but my daughter started preschool in the fall. She sucks her fingers which makes me cringe in germy situations, but she has faired well. Ask about the center's sick policy, they should have one, and try not to worry too much. She'll be just fine!

Hi, K.,

I have worked in daycares for a little over eight years. Your daughter probably will get sick. It will take awhile for your daughter to build up an immunity to all the things that are in a daycare. It also may seem like one thing right after another. Once she is exposed to all of the colds and other things, she will hardly ever get sick. It may take awhile, but she will get build up against that stuff. I know that I am grateful for the exposure for myself. I rarely ever get sick now. I realize that I am also 27 years old, but I have also seen this in most of the children. In the long run, you will be grateful. It really is not that bad, don't be afraid.

Also, I would make sure to ask about their cleaning routine. They should bleach their toys everyday before they leave for the day. Also, another little tip, look at the trash and make sure that it is being emptied a lot. That usually indicates that they are not cleaning like they should. They should be emptying it more than twice a day. Ask lots of questions and be very observant. If you feel at all uncomfortable about the center, look for a new one. Otherwise, you will be fine. Listen to your gut though- Good luck!

Hi K.,
Don't worry about your daughter. You're still nursing her, and giving her your immunities. In order for her to grow up healthy, she needs to be exposed to the colds and viruses that are out there so her body will develop immunities to the common illnesses. She might be sick a lot in the first few months, but she needs to, in order to be well as she grows up. It's nature's way of getting her prepared for entering independant life where she can't always rely on you to be there to keep her from touching yucky stuff. You can look at it like an investment in her future.

One thing you can do to keep the little stuff at bay is to have her wash her hands regularly and eat a healthy diet rich in fruit and vegetables. Because you're still nursing, you can take vitamin C which will go through you to her. Its like giving her a little booster. When I nursed, I'd take C and echinacea when I saw something coming down the pike (sibling or best playmate with a cold)or when I knew we were at high risk (flying or just before holidays). It worked, but I limited it to those times. You don't want to take it all the time, because it loses its effectiveness.

You're going into this in the best situation possible. It's going to happen eventually, better she joins the world of germs while she's still nursing. She might get some stuff at the front end, but as soon as it warms up and everyone can get outside, it'll slow down and she'll be better for it later.
L.

K.,

I don't blame you for being afraid for your daughter. You're a mom, it's what we do! :) Since you are only going back PT, and will have to pay for daycare, is there any way you could work from home instead? I personally work from home, and there is a HUGE work at home mom community on the web. It is possible to do, and then I can schedule my work around my schedule, and with my children.

This may not work for everyone, but for my family, when we were done calculating the cost of daycare, it just wasn't worth it. So I got creative :)If you want any info on this I would be glad to help, you can email me at ____@____.com But, I'm sure whatever you do, you will do just fine. Your daughter has had a benefit most children don't get, she's been home with you for 20 months, and breastfed. She probably has the worlds greatest immune system! On this, you have to go with your gut, or you'll never feel right about it. I wish you the best!
~L.

Hi K.,

Some germs can be good! They can help build your child's immune system....if they are never exposed to germs, their little bodies don't ever get the chance to fight them and become stronger! Think of it this way....she'll eventually have to go to Kindergarten, right? If she hasn't been exposed to germs by then, she'll be missing valuable learning time being absent from school!

My advice is to visit a few daycares (ask about their cleaning policy), check online, ask other parents, and start her at daycare BEFORE you go back to work (so you're available if she does need to be home sick). She'll most likely only get colds, and a few of them, before her immune system is used to it.

Whatever you decide, good luck!!

K.,

It is heartbreaking when you little one is sick, but unfortunately, we cannot protect them forever. The fact is that she will eventually get all of these colds and stuff when she hits school, when it is much more problimatic for her to be kept home, and can be harmful to her keeping up educationally. Secondly, the human body builds up antibodies from getting colds and such, so in a twisted way, she is actually being held back, immunity-wise.

As someone who spent the weekend with her 9 month old daughter, both of us with the stomach flu, I can tell you that it can be really hard. Especialy when you realize that it is common to have up to two colds a month as this age, each one taking about 10 days to clear up (when are they healthy then?). But in the long run, it really is better for them.

Try to focus on the positives - time with other adults is always a good thing, plus your daughter will get to develop her social skills, will get comfortable being cared for by others, and will start having her own life experiences - all really wonderful gifts for you to give your daughter.

K.,

Being a Mom is one of the hardest tasks in this world. I know of that being a Mom of a 7 year old that pretty much had to be in daycare since she was 8 weeks old. Unfortunately, she seemed to get everything that came down the pike. I contacted the pediatrician constantly.

It is hard to protect your children from other children's germs when they play so closely, but talk with the ped to see if vitamins could be a possibility.

Keep an eye on your gem and try to relax. I promise if germs are exchanged your gem will recover and be stronger when it comes time for school.

A. C.

Honestly, you are better off letting her be in this environment at nearly age 2 than waiting until age 5 or 6. We put our son in daycare at just over 2, and at first he did have a few colds, but after that, he has only been sick with a cold once or maybe twice a year. That's better than me, and I teach!

As for fear of germs, realize that we come into contact with them everyday, no matter how clean our home environment is. My sister, who has advanced degreees in public health, always reminds me that the cleaner and more sterile we are, the higher the chance we have of getting seriously ill.

It's fine to be a little apprehensive, going from parent/family provided care to something is bound to be. But don't beat yourself up over the decision, or think poorly of yourself as a parent. Your daughter has had good care by you, and you have provided her with lots of protection against illness through breastfeeding for so long. That will be a help a lot, but remember that being under the weather with colds and sniffles is part of growing up.

Good luck!

find a home day care ...call your church or local church and see if they can reccommed some one or post and add at the y