One Year Old Who Keeps Standing up in Crib

Hi Kristin,
My son did this when he learned to stand. He would stand up in his crib and didn't know how to sit down and would stand and cry. So we taught him it was ok to let go of the side of his crib and fall down. We put him in his crib or pack n play at a non-sleep time, he would stand up and hold onto the side and we would pry his fingers off the rail and let him fall. We would say "Baby Down!" and clap so it was a game. We did this over and over until he wasn't afraid to let go of the side and fall down. This helped a lot.

my son went through the exact same thing when he learned to stand. I would hide behind a bookshelf in his room and would let him do anything as long as he didn't start crying for real. as soon as he cried i would pick him up until he was quiet then put him back down. this could go on for 5-30 minutes and the phase lasted about 1 month. good luck!

This is actually completely normal and common. Most kids don't want to miss out on the new-found freedom of standing/walking by sleeping so it's normal for them to have sleep issues when learning to walk (or right before any big developmental break-through). It's frustrating, but it will get better.

For the mean time, what has worked for us during these phases (and trust me, there will be more challenging ones once you hit milestones like potty training and a "big boy" bed) is being really good about not going back in after the initial "good nights." Even when our little girl is pitching the biggest fit, if we go in it just makes for worse crying, bigger fits and it gets worse each night. It can drag the process out to 1-2 hours (versus 2-5 minutes of a fit).

Even though he's still little, he understands more than you know. Practice showing him how to get back down from standing during the day when it's not nap/bed time. Unfortunately, this skill can take a little longer than learning to stand. Let him know that it's bedtime and that if he stands up, he needs to lay himself back down and remind him how.

Try not going in there and see how he does. You know your child best... if he's going to completely lose it (or even make himself sick) then of course, go in there. :-) But you might find that 5-15 minutes of cries turns into 3-10 minutes the next night, 2-5 minutes and then nothing. Good luck - I promise it's a phase. Welcome to waddler-hood!! :-D

I think if I were in your shoes I would probably just not keep going into the room. I would peek from the door to make sure he's not hurt or in danger of hurting himsel. Eventually, as hard as it can be on you, he'll get tired and lay himself down and go to sleep. Every time you go into the room you're giving him attention so that probably perks him back up (even if you're not talking to him or playing, you're still there and he can see you) and gets it going even longer. If you're not going into the room then he's going to get bored faster and learn that it's not gaining him anything by fussing or refusing to go to sleep. If he's playing, let him play, he'll get tired and fall asleep. Good luck and in not too long I'll be going through the same thing (my youngest is 5 weeks old)!!

This reminds me of when my son used to do that. He knew it was nap time and if I peeked in and saw him standing, I would say quickly, You lay down, and he would drop real fast and pretend he was always there. It was so funny. There is no reason that your son has to lay down right away. Maybe he needs to wind down a bit after being out and about. If you leave him in the quietness, he should get bored of standing and lay down. I had soft toys in his crib to occupy him if he wasn't ready. If he cries a lot, you are right to go in and place him down again, but leave him alone for awhile so he knows you are not letting him get up.

I agree with both earlier responses. Both might work with different kids or even on different days. And try YAWNING when you're putting him down! It's contagious, and tends to be relaxing.

Babies are so excited when they master new skills. They work and work to perfect them, and sleep gets pushed aside by all that excitement for awhile. What I might try is to sit quietly beside the crib when I put the little guy down in a drowsy state, with just enough light that he knows you're there and can see that you are calm and acting drowsy (yawning) and not being upset by his activity. When he stands, lay him down and very quietly say the identical thing each time, maybe, "Please lie down; it's time to sleep now." The exercise should eventually become tiring and boring, and sleep will take over.

But if that does nothing but feed his energy, then leave the room and come back in only if he sounds truly scared or desperate. (My grandson would capture a knee between crib slats and end up collapsed on his foot, hurting and unable to free himself, so we would need to keep an eye on him.) I don't believe long periods of crying are helpful to kids' emotional adjustment in the long run, but a little fussing won't hurt anything.

Whatever you do, try not to see it as a battle. Babies are not our combatants, but it's hard to remember that when we are tired and needing to catch up on other tasks. But if you tense up around this or any situation, your adorable boy will probably sense that, and eventually learn to push your buttons. Not necessarily as a deliberate ploy, either. It is just one of the ways human beings adapt and learn to get their needs met.

However you respond to it, this stage will pass, and another will take its place. Happy parenting!

My son was doing the same thing. Finally I just would do the bed time routine, and leave the room. He'd fuss for a little while but after two days, he figured out that he could play, but I wasn't going to come back in again because it was bedtime. Now he'll play for a little while, but he goes to sleep pretty easily. I suggest not going back in at all.

He will figure it out but you have to stop going in and helping him.

My son went through a similar phase when he learned to push himself up into a sitting position on his own. He didn't want to lay down at all, so he would fall asleep sitting, and when I would try to lay him down, he would wake up screaming. I had a couple of sleepless nights worrying about him, and then finally he got it on his own. He realized it's not quite as comfortable sleeping hunched over as it is lying down, and then he learned to lay down on his own when he was sleepy. So I would suggest to stop laying him back down. It may take a couple of hard nights, but he'll get it!
W

Kristin,

You hit it right on the head. He doesn't know how to sit down. THis is very common at this age. Teach him and it should help.

J.

i do remember my son doing that. it seems that after a bit he did figure out how to get back down. just keep doing what you are doing. good luck!

My best advice is to put him in his crib and let him fuss around until he falls asleep. I have a one year old and I put her in her crib with a book often times. She also has her comfy things in there and a thing to play with on the side of the crib. Sometimes she plays herself to sleep, sometimes she just goes down immmediately. You might have to wait out the crying fits since he'll be expecting you guys to come in, but fight the urge. Give it at least five days.

Hi there Kristin. I had forgotten about this stage, but our 2 year old did this too. It only lasted for about a week and then he figured out how to sit down from his standing position and lay himself back down when he was really tired. That first week though, I do remember having to go into his room quite a few times to lay him down because he would be so exhausted, but hadn't figured out how to do it himself. What a funny stage! Good luck. I don't think it will last long, and it sounds like you're dealing with it in a smart way. =)

B. A.

one of mine (my second) jumped out of the crib once this behavior started. lots of blood and 7 stitches under his chin later... I wished I had taken him out of the crib/ put him in a toddler bed and worked from there at that point. If he wants to start being independent a toddler bed may be more interesting for sleeping than a crib.
mom of 3 weeks/ 3 year/ 6 year/ 12 year old boys

I believe my son also couldn't figure out how to lay down by himself and when we thought about it, we had always done it for him. Then he turned 10 months and he wasn't sleeping well. In talking with the dr and reading the information she provided us we had down the same things you did, but the information said not to lay him back down so we quit during that. That is when we figured out he may not have known how to lay down. He would fall asleep sitting up in his crib....it was so sad. It only took a few days for him to start laying down.

Kristin,

When both my kids (almost 5 yr old boy, 17 month old girl) hit this milestone we started waiting until they were more asleep than awake, then put them in their crib. If they still chose to stand and get stuck we'd go in and show them how to sit back down by gently grabbing their upper arms and gently pushing down telling them to sit down.

Both of mine learned how to get themselves down in fairly short time. We also leave soft toys and one toy attached to the side of the crib in there for my daughter (now) to play with.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

Same answer as most of the others...my daughter did the same when she first learned to pull to standing. I'd say it couldn't have been much more than a week before she figured out how to get herself back down. At first, I would go back in and lay her down, but then realized this wasn't very practical (she's our second child) and she quickly started doing it herself. Now she's all over the crib, but eventually lays down and goes to sleep. Sometimes with some fussing, but don't we all fuss about going to sleep some of the time?!

Yes, this is completely normal. My daughter too started standing up in her crib when she learned how to stand. I was concerned at first about her hurting herself, falling out, etc. and would go in a lay her down just like you do. But I learned after a few nights that she will lay down when she is tired and realizes you won't come in and get her. It sounds a bit sad, but even if they don't know "how" to get down, they can either lower themselves down along the rail, or more than likely, just fall down. It is a soft mattress, so they won't hurt themselves. The biggest thing is teaching them that once you tuck them in and say goodnight that you aren't going to come back in and they need to go to sleep. Otherwise, it becomes a power struggle or a game.