One Year Old Does Not Sleep Through the Night

I had a problem with my oldest, and I found that cutting the afternoon nap a little shorter and cutting out or making the bedtime snack earlier helped. The big thing for us was to get on a set routine (snack at 7:00, bath at 7:30, quiet play/books/movie until around 8:30, and then bed following). Hopefully it will work for you as well :-)

The book No-Cry sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantly has many good ideas for getting kids to sleep throught the night. It is a very gentle approach. It is not a quick fix though and requires planning and consistancy. I found it very helpful.

I suggest a great book that our dr. recommended when my middle child had the same problem. It's called Happy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child. It's written by a dr. (I think his last name is Weissbluth, but it might not be) who has YEARS of experience and has done many years of research on children and their sleep. The first half is more research and boring, but the second half of the book is more practical and interesting.

He says that the more sleep they get the better they sleep. He suggests putting them to bed around 7:00 or so, give or take a few minutes. If they go to bed late, they will have more problems getting to sleep and will wake more in the night. I have definitely seen this time and time again, even with my oldest, who is six. So to the person who said put him to bed later, sorry, but that is probably only going to make it harder for him to go to sleep. At least it definitely has for my kids.

One other thing that he does talk about is napping, and it might be time for him to go to one long nap a day instead of two, especially if you put him to bed earlier. Mine all did that around his age. We could put them to bed a little earlier and they were ready for bed. If we let them sleep too long during the day or gave them two naps after they were ready to stop napping, they had a lot of trouble getting to sleep that night.

As for the cry it out method, I agree that it is horrible. I hated it, and I refused to do it with my son, who was one before I finally thought I'd die and gave in and did it. My husband slept upstairs and I slept downstairs where i couldn't hear him, and it only took two nights. He cried a lot, though, at least two hours each time he woke up. Actually, he would cry, then talk, then cry, then talk, etc., but it was hard to listen to for me. The book suggests other methods that you can use, but the crying it out is the quickest, and i didn't have the patience for the others.

I agonized over whether to let him cry, and I was taking classes at the time about child psychology and learning about them developing an attachment to caregivers and was afraid that he would not learn to trust, etc., but I talked to some of my professors, whom I believed really knew what they were talking about, and they all said that the trust is built all of the time, not just at night, and letting them cry at night doesn't destroy that. They stop crying because they learn that you will be there at the right time, not during the night, and they know that you are there when they really need you. My son is five now, and he is a cuddly, sweet little guy. The crying it out didn't hurt him at all, even though he is much more cuddly than his sisters.

So good luck! Just remember: this too will pass! Someday they'll sleep and you will feel much better than you do today!

I know many moms replied who suggest the "cry-it-out" route - but you DO have other options if you don't want to do this method! There are LOTS of other, very effective approaches to improving sleep that don't involve looooooong bouts of your baby strongly crying, sweating, and eventually vomiting as he tries to settle (not much settling going on, eh?) to sleep! Please see below for links to websites and 2 books that all give you alternatives to "cry-it-out" and still help you both sleep more soundly.

I can tell you that for me, and for lots of other moms, we've found that the 1 yr mark is a time of *huge* transitions for babies (and so for us parents too)! There are LOTS of potential reasons that could all be going on at the same time for why he might not be sleeping well at this point: teething (often a big cause!), learning to walk/run (getting much more mobile), learning to talk, transitioning from 2 naps to 1 nap, eating more of and different varieties of solid foods (and possible upset tummy).

Also, based on your description of his having colic as a baby and never really sleeping well, I strongly encourage you to consider that he might react to cow's milk -- in fact, colic is a misdiagnosis in over 50% of cases (typically the real cause is food allergy and/or reflux or GERD). Sometimes the ONLY symptom of food allergy is poor sleep! If you want to find out whether he sleeps better without cow's milk, try a 2 week elimination of cow's milk (you'd want to read all labels and avoid any cow's milk and its derivatives like casein, whey, etc.) and monitor his sleep. If it improves, you pretty much have your answer. To be really sure, you could add cow's milk back in at the 2-week mark and watch for the sleep problems to come back. Anyway, here's what pediatrician Dr. Sears has to say about food allergies, if you're interested in exploring that more:
Tracking Down Food Allergies
http://askdrsears.com/html/4/t041800.asp

As far as sleep training, alternatives to "cry-it-out" (CIO), etc., I love these quick, practical, resources:

Quick and Dirty on Sleep
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2005/12/quick_and_dirty.html

Babies and CIO (fussing vs all-out-bawling)
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2006/06/babies_and_cio.html

Babies & Sleep Regressions
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2006/02/qa_what_are_sle.html

And here are some books that you can typically get for free at your local library (longer to read than the quick links given above, but well worth it in my opinion!):

Good Night, Sleep Tight
http://www.thesleeplady.com/

No Cry Sleep Solution
http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/books/0071381392.php

Also, depending on how mobile your little one is right now, I found that as soon as my babies were cruising and walking, they really *needed* a lot of opportunity for physical exercise during the day in order to sleep well at night - they were like energizer bunnies and really needed chances to climb, walk, squat, pull up, and just burn off energy in general. Days where they didn't get as much physical activity almost always led to a harder time going to sleep at nap or bedtime.

So... hang in there! Check out the resources available to you and decide what resonates with you most - you know your child and yourself better than anyone (any expert, any doctor, and any of us here on mamasource)!

I know this may sound crazy but....a good sparkling mineral water may help here. My children love it, and it soothes the stomach without the sugar...

I love that you don't let him cry anymore that long.. I feel for you both.

I would also suggest that he maybe allergic to the formula or milk? Not sure but it sounds that way....

Peaceful dreams soon...

Blessings. S.

Dear A. J.,
I do feel your pain! My daughter was the same way.
She is 16 years old now. It might be that he an allergy to milk. The more I read the more I think she was allergic to cow's milk.
An excellent resouce that we used as the kids were growing was Growing Kids International.(www.gfi.org) There is a CD called Welcome to Babywise Bliss! The topics that are covered are Babies and Sleep, When babies cry and more.
They also have other resources for when your child gets older. I hope you take advantage of these materials as I know they have helped us tremendously in the past.

L. M.

Have you tried shortening his naps during the day a little bit and putting him to bed later at night? Only let him sleep for about and hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon (gradually shorten the naps by 10 minutes each until you get it down to an hour) and then don't put him down at night until about 10?
It worked with my night owl daughter.
She was a little cranky at first but swung into the routine and I got to sleep a lot more at night!
P. R

Does he have a special lovey? A blanket or a stuffed animamal? My dd didn't sleep through the night till she was almost 9 mos old. I can totally understand how exhausted you are! We finally just gave her a blankie and had to let her learn to self sooth. She really surprised me. The first night was the worst, she woke up and fussed (not really crying) for about 15 mins. Then she fell asleep. After that, she slept like a champ! Can you do the Ferber method? Go in every so many minutes and calm him down then leave again. I know it's hard, nobody wants to see their little one cry like that :( Let me know if I can offer any more help.

I would have him eat lunch earlier and nap about a half hour after lunch. I used to feed my boys at 11am and by noon they were going down for a nap. I wouldn't let him sleep more than 2 hours. Try to get him ready for bed around 8pm. I used to turn off the lights at 8pm, get him changed or bathed, then they would be asleep by 9pm. Prior to bedtime I would wear his little butt out. Get him running around, playing tag, chase him and get him tired.

Without reading others responses and myself being up VERY early this saturday morning 1. forive me being short on my reply - 2. I have similiar issues that were pending before the start of May.......but I had to do the FERBER method and just let my daughter ( now one years old 13+months) cry it out. But if you son is vomiting and being very emotional it sounds like anxiety and seperation issues.......panic attacks/anxiety I have had since I had asthma attacks as a teen- they are not FUN times and well I can say comforting and relaxation is key+
But I would try a soothing sound machine and or white noise it soothes my son now TEN yrs old , and my daughter to the point it puts US to sleep while waiting on them!
Otherwise warm baths with lavendar oil and a nice massage afterwards before bed time ( 30mins prior to bed times) helps and the majority of the moms I know have agreed.

Just let us know how things work out. Call a ped dr if his vomiting and fits get worse.

Try to cut out the afternoon nap. He'll be cranky but it may help him to sleep at night. Also, sometimes it takes some kids longer to sleep through the night then others. My youngest didn't sleep through the night until he was almost 3 yrs. old. If you don't want to cut out the afternoon nap keep him up a little later at night.
D.

I am 31 and have been married for almost 12 yrs. My husband and I have 3 boys ages 10,7 and 4.

To start off don't mind my rambling, we had my daughters 4th birthday yesterday, and she and my son both had friends over to spend the night (which ment they were all up giggling most of the night!!!) Oh and my youngest decided to get up at 6:30 this morning, so I have only had a couple hours of sleep!!!

At 1 yr it is time to give up one of the naps during the
day:( I know I really miss my daughter taking two naps during the day it really frees up time for me to spend with my other two!! It sounds like he is just not tired enough to sleep through the night espceially if he was doing much better before and just started this. Is he teething at all or if the waking up multiple times hasn't been going on to long it could be an ear infection. My children would not sleep as well when those things were going on. Sometimes when they begin new things ie: walking, standing, crawling they will not sleep as well also.

If you have him off of bottles don't go back to them, it is a hard habit to break and if you have done it once you really don't want to go back it is harder the second time!!!!

I have let all 3 of my children cry it out, and I think it is a good method but if your son is getting to the point of vomiting you could also try the "nanny show" ( I can't remember the name of the show!!) method and gradually work your way out of the room but you would have to sit in there until he fell asleep for a couple of nights.

Well I don't know if any of this will help you but hopefully with all of the different ideas everyone has put out there for you something will work!! Good Luck and good sleep!!!

A.

My baby wasn't sleeping through the night and it sent red flags up for my pediatrician. Try feeding him close to bed time, I've been feeding my son a BIG bowl of cereal with either a fruit or veggie stired in for flavor. He now sleeps through the night(at least 7 hours) without needing anything. If he misses the cereal(ie. he falls asleep before it's time and I don't wake him up)He will be up once or twice to nurse. Also, before I started feeding him an additional meal, he was hitting me when I was trying to put him down, I really think it was all related to being hungry. The only other time we have any issues is when he's teething, we've started giving him baby tylenol before meals and bedtime, this also has helped. Good Luck!

I am also a first time mom and my little one turned 1 year in April, so my advice is not time tested, but it definitely worked for us. I know a lot of people use the "cry it out" method, but after trying this time after time I decided I really don't completely agree with that. My mom rasied 10 babies very successfully and never let her kids cry. We found out that after 10-20 minutes of crying if our son didn't settle down then he was crying for a reason. The trick was just figuring out what that reason was! We have only had him sleeping through the night now for about 1 month and for us it was when we started to ween. I was still feeding him each time he woke up in the night(1-3 times a night) mostly because it was easier than dealing with it at all hours of the morning, but of course it eventually had to stop.

Is there something that you can use as "leverage"? For example, the only way we were able to break him of night time feedings was by starting to offer a bottle.....and he hates bottles! If he woke up I would go in and pick him up (which I know some people disagree with too) and offer either a bottle or a binky. When he would refuse the bottle I would offer the binky and then lay him back down with the binky. Sometimes we would have to do this multiple times, but usually by the 3rd time or so he would go to sleep. The one thing to keep in mind is that the first night will be the hardest, but it does get easier! Also what I had to do for myself was decide ahead of time how long I would stick with the routine each night. One night he was up at 4 am and remember setting a limit for myself that I would do this until 7 am if necessary and then I would give in and nurse! I think I was only up for an hour and then he was asleep! That way it doesn't seem endless.

We are still taking 2-2hour naps each day and he still sleeps through the night. If I tried to cut out a nap right now I would have one very fussy and miserable 1 year old. Every couple of hours he is ready for a nap and if I don't lay him down it isn't fair to him....he gets so fussy and tired.

Good Luck. This is such a hard issue.....I had people giving me guff that he wasn't sleeping through the night at 6 months. You have to do what you feel is right. It is good to get advice, but you still have to do what you feel comfortable with and trust that even as a first time mom, you definitely have a very strong, very valuable mother's intuition!

Beth

Hello A.!
I'm guessing that your son is probably getting molars! Sometimes it takes a couple months for them to push their way up and you might not be able to feel it yet, but it may still be uncomfortable enough to wake him up multiple times a night. My son (who is 2 1/2 now) started waking up like that around 12-13 months. My daughter as well (she's 6). If that is the case, I suggest trying Baby Motrin (it's an 8-hour formula as opposed to 4-6 hours for baby tylenol) and maybe some oragel before bed. If he still wakes up, try changing his diaper and applying some more oragel and rocking or a bottle or whatever. If that doesn't work, I think you got some good advise already about sleep habits that would be helpful to try.
Good luck and God bless,
J. B

I'm sorry you are having so much trouble:( Someone once recommended Bach Rescue Sleep, I didn't try it because my son's problems resolved themselves once he was healthy (he had pneumonia, the stomach flu, and then an ear infection in just over 2 weeks). I guess it's all natural and safe for kids.

Have you tried putting him down earlier? I have read that children under age 5 should be asleep by 8:00. Sleep begets sleep, and all that I suppose.

Don't know if you are nursing him. A friend had to have her husband go in and pat their son's back every time he got up for a few nights and it got better. If she went in, he just wanted to nurse.

Good Luck!

My son just started sleeping through the night. Actually, it kinda happened by accident. We both got the stomach flu and I took him completely off dairy (he is 15 months old and loves yogurt). Anyway, since he has been off dairy, he has been sleeping through the night. I think it gave him gas and the bubbles in his belly woke him up b/c they hurt him. So now, I give him rice milk which he likes and it doesn't cause him gas. And he still sleeps through the night.

A friend recomended "Good Night, Sleep Tight" to me when I was having problems w/ my daughter. I love this book, had great success, and still refer to it.

Hi A.!

I can truly feel for you! My son didn't sleep through the night until he was 15 months. Are you still giving him something to eat/drink when he wakes up? Because that might have nothing to do with it!

At 9 months, I was still giving my son a small bottle when he woke up. I decided to cut that out after lots of advice. I watered down his formula to where he was getting only water. Then decreased the ounces to nothing. And guess what. He still got up and didn't fuss for a bottle or a drink.

The cry it out method NEVER worked. We tried at 9, 10, and 12 months with the same result: uncontrollable crying, wet snotty face, and throwing up. So I always got up, gave him a hug, held him until he fell back asleep, and layed him down. I figured he just needed some extra comfort. To this day he's still a cuddle bug.

But, I finally figured out the problem one day when my son was go, go, going and just crashed on my bed. I put pillows around him and left him. Whenever I checked on him he was at a different place, totally turned around. I actually watched him sit up and throw himself to the other end. I realized he was probably hitting himself on the crib slats and waking up.

So I asked my son's pediatrician about transitioning into a real bed, and he said as long as he could climb up and down, he will be safe. So I bought a rail and began putting him in a twin bed (on the floor, no frame) for naps. After a week of that, we put him in the twin bed at night. And he has slept through the night ever since.

I'm not sure if a bed change is the answer for everyone, but that's what worked for us. Maybe transitioning into one nap might help. Or running your son to extreme exhaustion! With nice weather, I took my son outside 4-5 times a day and played hard with him. He slept great!

You didn't mention, so, a great routine at night helps alot. But, do you have any issues with co-sleeping? My daughter has been sleeping with us most of her 18 months. We are all getting great sleep. We are in the process of weaning her. So her routine is a bath, a very little TV, a book, a bottle, and she falls asleep with that. I put her in her own big girl bed. Most nights, she stays asleep. But, maybe once or twice a week, she will just get up & come to our bed & finish the night.
PS-I know that people will say she shouldn't have a bottle at this age, but this is what works for me & I will do it til it doesn't work anymore.

It seems like he's going to bed too late. My daughter just turned one, and she takes two naps during the day, around the same times of day and the same lengths (although it varies) and she's in bed by 7:30pm. IF we put her to bed later, she actually doesn't sleep as well. It's worth a shot! Good luck!

I would try cutting his afternoon nap short so he is more tired when he goes to bed. Then stretching his morning nap later and later until you can get him taking just one nap a day. It sounds like maybe he is sleeping too much during the day and is not as tired at night. Just make minor adjustmants (10 minutes every 3-4 days to let him adjust). I hope this makes sense. You can read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" sorry I don't remember the author, but it has some good info. While makeing these adjustments, you may have to put him to bed earlier until he adjusts. We went through the same thing with my daughter and when we got her sleeping less during the day (1-2 hours), she now sleeps 7:30am to 7:30pm. Good luck!!!!

It may be time to try one nap from around 1-4 in the afternoon. He may not be sleepy enough. Also, try some soothing music in his room.