Nursing/weaning a Toddler

My daughter (25 months) and I are going through the same thing. I decided to contimne for a little while longer. It is really tough at times for me but she loves it. Best wishes!

I'm tandem nursing my 6 month old and 29 month old so I understand. I've put time limits on nursing now using the ABC's. Such as, you can have 2 ABC's tonight or just one ABC for your nap. You can sing it as fast or as slow as you want and it works amazing. I have a very persistent little girl who knows exactly what she wants and I've got the Abc's working well. I also cut out the daytime nursing because "only babies nurse during the day, big girls nurse at night." that works for us because she has a little brother that still needs it round the clock. Do what works for you. You don't seem like you really want to wean her so if you don't, then don't. You won't regret continuing but could regret stopping.

1st of all U have to be sure of what U want..U sound undecisive. Nursing bonds the 2 of U in weeks it doesn't have to b 2 years. She'll fuss until U completely stop nursing; then she'll get use to just milk and food. It's a little confusing even for babies to stop-start or nurse occasionally. So, it's all up to U mommy.

Sounds like she has that need to suck fulfilled. Does she have a pacifier? My son went from nursing to useing a pacifier and it worked great...I just took the pacifier away when he was about 3 and 1/2.

Personally, if she is still THAT attached to it...I would continue. I let my son self wean and I was so happy, because there was no fighting or struggle, when he was ready to be done, he was done and everyone was happy. I worked full time so I pumped for him till he was 14 months, then he started getting cows milk mixed with his BM bottles, then gradually to just cows milk and then to a sippy cup. I still nursed him at night (he stopped waking in the morning to nurse), once when we got home and then before bed. Gradually he cut out the after work (it worked well for me to run errands or something during that time then I could kind of put him off till we got home and eventually he just stopped asking for it). Then at 29 months we moved him to a big boy bed. The first night I asked him if he wanted his "gilkies" and he said, no I just want to go to sleep. And....so he did!

Your body doesn't make as much as they eat more and more table food. But the milk gets more concentrated. So even if they are only getting a tiny amount each time, they are still getting all the great stuff that BM has in it.

At this point I would just do "don't offer, don't refuse" and try to do something to distract her if you want to start cutting down. If it doesn't work, it doesn't. Don't stress over it. You will both be much happier if you don't fight it. And...she WILL do it herself at some point. They are only little for such a short time and before you know it they are all grown. Soon this will be a distant memory. I know how hard it is to not have your body to yourself, but I feel like it is a worthwhile sacrifice for such a great benefit for your little one. And soon enough she will wean.

Congratulations for sticking it out this long...I know it is not easy in this day and age when everyone wants to you make your baby independent as quick as possible. In today's world it is soo good for them to know they can turn to you until THEY are ready to seperate.

I nursed my son until just a little past 3.5 years. He was VERY attached and sometimes I got tired and didn't want to but I thought about how little time out of my (and his) life breastfeeding would have taken up and I decided to let him continue. I would get tired in spells, and they would pass. A few things I did to start limiting was to give a time limit when he breastfed outside of the sleep cycle (going to sleep or waking up.) If it was some other time in the day, I would let him choose how many seconds to nurse for (his favorite number was 14 seconds). I would count it out for him and tell him all done and he'd let go. Soon he just nursed around the sleep cycle. I started counting that out for him too, and by my choice we cut out his afternoon nap, so soon he was only nursing to sleep and wake up at night. By the time we cut that one out he was ready.

Good luck.

Hi H.,
I nursed my daughter well after her first B-day as well. She also became very aggresive towards nursing and wanted to nurse all the time!! I simply told her that "M. ran out of milk" and offered her a sippy cup everytime she asked to nurse. It was a really tough three days, tons of crying! I felt like a horrible M.! Then as the days went on she asked less and less, and it really only took 4 or 5 days for her to give up and accept that we were done nursing. Don't feel bad. You are awesome to nurse her this long, and have the right to stop after 22 months!!

I nursed two children well into toddlerhood and spent 14 1/2 years as a La Leche League Leader. Congratulations for nursing for 22 months. Your daughter is thriving and getting so much more than just breastmilk. I do think, however, that she is picking up on your ambivalence towards the nursing relationship and that is making her feel a wee bit insecure. She is much too young to understand or to verbalize how she feels, but she does know that nursing is comforting to her, so that's what she wants. Back off and relax a little bit. Let her nurse, but also give her lots of hugs and kisses. Keep her busy and offer healthy snacks. Get out of the house on these beautiful days. A pause in the weaning process might let both of you relax. With the tension gone she will feel more confident and may start to wean herself.
You also mentioned that she is learning a lot - not surprising at this age - but often during periods in which children are making strides physically or intellectually they want to nurse more often. I'm not sure why, but they seem to need the closeness and reassurance of that relationship. So, you may have two triggers that are spurring her to cling to nursing.
Good luck.

Bottom line is...it is just going to be really hard for a little while, but she will get over it...I weaned one at 3...then he was old enough to really understand, I also weaned one at 22 mo, it was a tough few days, but we made it! I will say, if she is an only child you may want to just keep going but put some firm boundaries around it, like only in your bed first thing in the morning (which is what I am currently doing with my 15 mo old), hold tight to it and again it will be rough for a couple dyas, but it pays off in that you get to keep nursing without the frustrating parts of it... feel free to email with any questions...good luck and great job for going this far!!

I just want to say congratulations for being such a dedicated mama and nursing your sweet girl for this long!! I think you have given her a wonderful gift.
But honestly I don't know how to help you. My dd is 17 months and seems to be self weaning pretty easily. I knew I wanted to let her self wean so I guess I am getting really lucky that she is doing it sooner rather than later.
Whatever you decided to do please wean her gently :)
Good luck mama!!

I know what you're going thru too. I have a 26 month old who is nursing. I try to limit it to first thing in the morning, and nap time. I like those snuggley times, and she definitely doesn't seem ready to wean, so that is what I'm trying to compromise with. Sometimes if she is having a bad day I let her nurse at other times.

Sometimes setting limits helps moms feel better and able to continue to nurse for a while longer. Also, look for the book "How Weaning Happens." It might provide some useful information. Good luck!

http://www.amazon.com/How-Weaning-Happens-Diane-Bengson/d...

Hi H.,
Congrats on nursing your girl so long! I know how it feels to feel like you want your body back - I weaned my son at about that age (and was 5 months preg at the time) because I needed a break. Don't feel guilty about it - you did great.

The thing that worked the best for me was distraction and a change in routine. This is a lot tougher when you're a SAHM (I was working until I had my second 2 months ago). For example, is there something that she REALLY loves you can offer her? Chocolate milk, a trip to the park etc. I was able to drop the before-bed nursing by moving it up earlier - first it was before the bath, then it move to before dinner, and was finally replaced by a trip to the park before dinner. Morning was the last one to go for us and he forgot about it once we moved him to a big boy bed. Suddenly, instead of me getting him from his crib and snuggling in bed and nursing, I could send his dad into his room and dad and him would read books in his new bed - very novel and exciting.

It also helps to cover up a bit so your breasts aren't as "available". Hard in the summer, I know, but sometimes what they don't see, they don't think of. If you're still nursing during the night, the best way to drop that is to send your husband in to comfort her or ignore her for a few nights. Not sure what to do if you co-sleep other than wear a shirt.

Good luck!!

I nursed my son until he was 27 months old. I wanted to do it til 2 but school, work and life were too complicated for him to understand.

I'm one of the lucky ones. We were down to 2 times per day....when he woke up and right before bed. That's my first suggestion, bring it down to two. Then we stopped it totally. It was not easy to redirect and I almost gave in so many times because he would cry or get hysterical for "mama milk." This will be so much harder on you. He did this (luckily) for only about a week and then kept insisting for about 3 more weeks. I finally started telling him they were broken and there was no more milk. He liked regular milk so we substituted with that whenever he asked for milk like that was what he was asking for. When he asked for mama milk I said there was no more.

Remember, a temper tantrum will not damage your child. Crying and not getting their way will not damage your child, on the contrary it will help when you are consistent. Make sure to stress what a big girl she is and that she's not a baby anymore. Do other fun things. But when you are ready to deal with the crying (and there will be a lot of that) then stay strong. She will eventually stop. And it will be harder on you than her to try and tune her tantrums out. You are a good mom who is doing the best for your daughter. Congrats on making it this long!!!!!

I nursed all 3 children and they all were different. My first was a boy and he is now almost 11, but he stopped on his own at 17 months old (actually it was 2 weeks before he was 17 months. But I had gotten him down to only feeding at night. My second was 2 weeks before she was 2 - she sounds just like your daughter - she always wanted to nurse as soon as I would sit down - she would crawl up on my lap - we finally had to go away for the night and grandma came to take care of her - it worked out fine! My third is a boy and he was 2 weeks before 2 also - he was just like my daughter - but I knew it wasn't necessary anymore, but just a comfort for him. The way I knew is he would nurse for a few min. and then be done, plus he was eating enough table food too.

but... it was a hard decision to make because even at that age there is some benefit to nursing - but only if they are really making it a "feeding" and not just for comfort.

Hope this helps! I really enjoyed nursing my kids and can't believe how fast it went!

I also am a SAHM with an almost 11, 7 and 3 yr olds. I enjoy being a SAHM too!