Ok, my daughter is gonna be 3 in December. I've been trying to get her potty-trained for MONTHS! She goes to early head start 2x a week and when she's there she sits on the potty, but she doesn't go. At home it's a different story! She knows when she has to go poop. She actually goes in the bathroom, and shuts the door to poop in her diaper! I've tried just not putting anything on her, no diaper or anything. And she won't pee or poop, she just holds it. I keep telling her that if she has to go just sit on her potty, she won't. She'll tell me she needs a diaper on if she has to go, when I don't put one on she keeps holding it in.She actually tell me 'mom I need a diaper on.' Eventually she can't hold in her pee and a little leaks out, but she STILL won't sit on the potty! We've got her a little Elmo potty and one of the seats that go on the regular toilet, she doesn't want anything to do with either! I've tried offering different types of things, reading a book, candy etc. and that doesn't work. Her father and I are not together, we haven't been her whole life. So every other weekend she goes to his house. He says that he makes her sit on the potty there but she still doesn't go. I don't know if he physically holds her there or not, but I doubt he does. Everytime I use the toilet I show/tell her that I'm using it and I let her flush thinking maybe she'd want to do the same. No luck. I'll even tell her that if she just SITS on the potty we can go outside and play or whatever and she won't even sit on the darn thing! She'd rather stay inside and miss out on fun than sit on the toilet. I'm really at my wit's end! I know I should be patient, but we've been trying this for 6 months at least and now she craps in the bathroom in her diaper! Does anyone have any advice for potty-training a headstrong child?
Maybe you should call it a day and try again in a month or so. Follow her lead and see what happens. At this point, what have you got to lose?? Good luck!!
L.
I also just wanted to let you know I feel your frustration. I am on child #4 and she's been the fly in the ointment, so to speak. I'm not so concerned about night-time stuff, I know some kids have that problem for a long time. However, this day time "I'm not going to use the potty just because" stuff is very frustrating. It takes a LOT of self-control, but the less of an issue I've made of it, the more inclined she is to actually use the toilet. The weirdest thing for me was that she started wanting to sit on the potty way before any of the others ever had wanted to. I got so excited. I thought. Woohoo! She'll be potty trained before she's two. NOT!! lol It's hard, but try to remember that it WILL pass. Trust me, my oldest is 17...in the grand scheme of things...this is SUCH a minor argument!!
Weird. I would swear I wrote your question. This is my third child. I potty trained the first two without a hitch and they were younger than most. My youngest wants her diaper changed as soon as she goes in it. But she is sitting on the potty to do it. When she is done she says Momma I need a diaper. I have kept her naked all day. In hopes of catching her in an accident so I could run her on the potty. No she will hold it and hold it and hold it. If it gets to the point she really has to go and she starts to know its gonna come out. She says I need a diaper on and if I put one on her she goes and sits on her potty chair and goes.She shows all of the signs of being ready so its not me pushing or anything. Well I have no answers for you and we have a large family of kids and anyone in my family all says the same thing "that is weird." I just wanted you to know you were not alone in this frustrating time. Good Luck and let me know if you figure it out I want to be done with diapers all together.
Let her go at her own pace. Two of my three boys were 5 before they were trained. I know it's a hassle but it has to be the right time for her. Have you tried going to Pull-Ups? Once you switch you can't go back, though. Let your daughter know "these are big girl pants and you can't go potty in them" or something to that effect. Eventually she'll get it right and it will happen all at once like turning on a lightswitch. If you keep pushing her to use the toilet she won't do it. It's a control thing. She has to think it's her idea to use the toilet.
Our daughter was a tough cookie to crack also. Finally I tried setting a timer every 1/2 hour. When the timer went "ding" I announced it was potty time. We would go sit on the potty. First she would get an M&M for sitting on it. Then that changed to only when she went pee or poop and then eventually only when she pooped. This process took about 2 weeks. She was about 3-1/2 when this was done. We were under the time crunch also to get her potty trained before pre-school. Now she looks for an M&M after her poop....when she remembers to ask for it, which is seldom. Good Luck!!
I used the book, potty training in less than a day, and it worked for me. I knew mine could but just wouldn't. Basic premise is that your daughter trains the doll. I didn't do it exactly like the book said and it still worked. Good luck!
Hi A.,
My daughter is 19 months so we haven't started potty training her yet. I did ask her pediatrician at her 18 month apt. and her advice was to just wait until she is completely ready to potty train her. Then it'll go smoothly and quickly. She said if I try and she seems reluctant, it will only set her back and make me frustrated. I would just wait and let your daughter lead you and she'll do it when she's ready. I wouldn't push the issue at all. I hope that helps!
My daughter was exactly the same way! I was training her for almost a year on and off. I kept giving up because she just wouldn't poop on the potty. She refused. She would tell me when he needed a diaper and poop in it, then demand to be changed. This went on for months. I tried every bribe to get her to poop on the potty. Nothing worked, she'd just decide she wasn't interested in a new paint set. She was completely pee trained and wore panties all the time, even at night! Finally, one day she asked for a diaper and I was in the middle of something so I repeated "You can use the potty." A few minutes later she called for me and showed me her poop on the potty! It was amazing, I wanted to do cartwheels. She was so headstrong about it, it was as if me wanting her to do it made her not do it. One day she just made the decision and has been doing it ever since. Hang in there, I know it's frustrating! I think our little headstrong ones have to make the decision themselves with gentle encouragement from us. It will happen!
