Not Eating, Part 2... - Richmond,VA

Have you had him evaluated for any sensory issues? My son has a speech and language delay, and has always been a picky eater, and also has sensory issues. He has trouble with foods that have a rough texture to them, or have a particular odor. He detests meat, especially hamburger. He also has a hard time with loud noises, especially unfamiliar ones. When he was a little one, he was very sensitive to clothing. He hated anything scratchy or rough like jeans. Not sure if this is what your little guy is going through, but he sounds a lot like my son.

I saw your other post and Marda and others gave you great advice. 24 lbs at 22 months is better than some,, so be encouraged : )

What does his pediatrician say? Schedule an appointment (his 2 year checkup is coming up) and lay your concerns on the table. Ask for a referral to a nutritionist whose advice can be invaluable, and follow up on all suggestions your pediatrician and nutritionist offer.

My daughter was extremely picky, but her doctor said that if she ate two teaspoons of food a day, literally "like a bird," it was enough. He also said her body wouldn't let her starve, and she didn't. From 18 months to 3.5 years she ate pitifully, but then gradually began to pick up on her own. His reassurance went a long way towards my letting go of the worrying, as I incorporated the nutritional aspects into the foods she would eat.

Hang in the, R., {HUGS}

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Does he get Occupational Therapy in addition to his speech therapy? 24 lbs at 22 months is not horrible, but I can see the concern because he was what, in the 90% percentile at 9 months and now in like the 10th? I would say his feeding issues are definetly related to his speech delay. My son had some sensory issues that were related to a speech delay as well. Food still continues to be an issue. It does get better. You need a professional to help you with this. You previous post sounded very militant. Like you think your son is being a bad boy. I hate the phrase "I am not a short order cook". Maybe not, but you are his mother. You can not create a "good eater" or a "picky eater" you can only help a child maximize what nature gave them. We put my son on a sensory diet and that helped with everything. He still really enjoys crunchy and chewy food the most. He is very sensitive to hot or mushy food but with help and time it does get better.

"Speech, language and sensory integration, including oral defensive issues, often go hand in hand."

I totally agree with this poster's comment. My daughter has SPD, and when she was younger we had a hard time getting her to eat. At one point, she ate lots and lots and lots of food. Then she got to the point where she'd only eat certain foods. And what she would eat wasn't considered the best of foods for a child to eat. However, we were so happy she was eating anything that we let her eat them and worked on getting her transferred over to better, more nutritous food.

Nowadays she's pretty good about trying everything once (she's 11), but she'll only eat bland food. We've been lucky in that she is very interested in organic food; she knows it's good for her and is interested in eating it. She likes comfort food, though (sweets, carbs) and we have to work very hard on making sure she doesn't overindulge. Certain textures bother her, and she'll eat some food made one way and not another.

I have a friend who's little girl refuses to eat. They took her to a specialist who "trains" children with eating disorders/problems. It's worked, but it requires continuous work and diligence by everyone.

Good luck, and I wish you lots of luck. It's a lot of work, but it's worth it and it definitely pays off. If you haven't had him tested yet for sensory issues, I would. Refusing to eat/not eating much is definitely related to sensory issues.

When I read your updates I thought of my nephew, he has aspergers. He has a lot of sensory issues. My sister had the hardest time with him, he too would have a fit when he found hidden foods. He also has other problems, allergies and such.
I would talk to your Dr and the speech therapist, they may have more answers for you. It is possible they have seen this kind of behavior. In the mean time I wouldn't force him, at this point it's not worth the fight. I think as long as he is getting the pediasure and multivitamins he should be just fine.

I am not a big fan of processed foods, but maybe try Gerber Graduates. I used to keep these in my bag when we would travel and my daughter always ate them including the veggies.

Hi R.. I know exactly what you're going thru! My son has feeding problems that started very early on. He never took a bottle, only BF. When it was time to introduce solids he wouldn't eat. We continued trying every day but by nine months he was eating absolutely nothing, only breast milk. His pedi sent us for a speech evaluation. After two months of feeding therapy he made no progress and his speech therapist sent us to be evaluated at a feeding program in Dallas. From 9-12 he had not gained any weight and started slowly losing. Because at this time he was eating no foods and losing weight he was admitted to Baylor's intensive feeding program. I'm not saying that your son needs that, but there were many other children we met while there who like your son would only eat a handful of foods. Although, we were never given a definite diagnosis, the drs and therapist assumed his feeding difficulties were due to sensory aversions. When a baby learns to eat they form facial muscles that are important when developing speech. It is very common for a poor eater to have speech delays. I strongly suggest you talk to your pedi. I know you said he was getting therapy from Early Intervention but your pedi may want to send him to be evaluated by a speech therapist that specializes in feeding. My son is now out of the feeding program where we spent nearly six weeks! Ugh! I'm happy to say to almost 17 month old is finally eating! Just baby food, but hey it's food, right? We are continuing feeding therapy with his speech therapist twice a week to introduce new foods and textures. Ok sorry for the long response! Just wanted to tell you my experience with feeding difficulties. Feel free to pm me anytime! Good luck to you!

I saw your post. You have more going on than a "picky kid". And your son not being able to communicate is not helping matters. I would first consult the doctor, which I have no doubt you are doing already. Find out if he thinks the dietary therapy is needed, and decide from his advice. In my opinion, it's a case of "what can it hurt?". It's obvious that his issues are much more than exerting his independence.

My son was labeled "failure to thrive" at nine months (born in the 95th percentile and then fell off the chart - we would have done cartwheels if he weighed in at 24 lbs at his two year check up). So the situation is a bit different, but I can relate to parts of it. My son wasn't particularly picky, but I was told to feed him what he'd eat. It was suggested to introduce stuff and try to get him to eat, but don't force the issue to battle stages. Since my son wasn't picky, it was advice that didn't really apply to us. So in your particular situation, I think I'd play short order cook for a bit. Cook the family meals and eat with him, but have his foods there for him to eat. I was worried about starting bad and unhealthy eating habits with my son, but I was assured that there was plenty of time to correct that behavior later. I was reminded to choose one battle at a time. Right now, is it more important that he eat period, or that he eats what the family is eating?

To help with weight gain, add butter and olive oil to what you can. And something that helped my son add on some weight was milkshakes made with pediasure. So IF your son will drink it, it's worth a try.

Hang in there mama!

R.-

You are not alone! My son is 9 and still only eats a short list of foods. Fortunately, I've been able to balance his diet so he is growing well-- hang in there, you will figure out your own system.

I suspect your son has some sensory issues like mine does. They are very common in kids with other issues (like the speech delay). At the evaluation meeting, ask about occupational therapy. We finally got approved for this and it is starting to help after just 3 sessions. In the meantime, try different temperatures or textures (when you can!) to see if there is a sensation he prefers. My son will eat almost anything crunchy so I buy Snapea Crisps and Veggie Booty and freeze-dried fruit. It sounds crazy, but it works. Also try cold foods-- freeze Yoplait Whips yogurt, feed him frozen peas (just watch for choking!) or slice and freeze grapes. My son doesn't like food that is room temperature unless it has a strong taste (like peanut butter) because it feels "wrong" in his mouth. Once you understand what sensation your son needs, you will probably discover quite a few new possibilities.

Good luck! Let me know if you need more suggestions.
S.

It sounds like he has more issues than just being picky. Has he been diagnosed as failure to thrive? If he hasn't gained weight in a year, then he has surely fallen off of his growth curve. Is the doctor concerned?

My short answer would be yes, give him what he will eat. But, what I have tried to do is to put at least one thing on the plate that I know my son will eat and then put some other things on there with it that are new for him to try. This way, I know he will eat something and hopefully will eat a few bites of something new also. It is a process and it sounds like there is much more than just pickiness going on here. You should really be taking to his doctor and possibly get him into OT as some other posters have mentioned.

My son has always been picky, but he continued to grow and was healthy, so his doctor told me to stop worrying and just let him eat what he would eat. He has gotten a lot better, although he still definitely has his favorites, but at least he will sometimes try something new depending on his mood. But, as I mentioned in my answer to your previous post, he is almost 3.5 now. At your son's age, it was a much different story. I know it's hard, but just try to be patient. Give him what you know he will eat, but pair it with something new and see if you can get him to try it a little bit at a time. Best of luck to you. I feel your pain!

R.:

I don't know how to help you. None of my kids were picky eaters. I made them try everything...if they tried it, great. if they didn't, bread and water, I'm not a short order cook.

You said that he ate stuff when he went out to lunch with you a few weeks ago. Have you tried to replicate that meal?

I tell you - bring him up to me...my boys will have him yapping and eating in no time!!! :)

I can understand your frustration though. It would bother me that his weight hasn't changed and that he won't eat much...

i'm not sure if the program ya'll have in VA is the same as First Steps here in Missouri, but it is from birth through 3 years old and encompasses a ton of stuff. Our oldest has been in it for speech therapy for roughly a year now. He, along with his twins baby brothers, were all born with bilateral cleft lip and palate, so his speech is delayed and his intelligibility used to be horrible but it's getting better....anywhoo, his SLP told us that they have help with eating issues, OT, PT, and on and on. Maybe that could help? I'm not sure. With the type of food he will eat, are there similarities such as same texture, same flavor base etc? maybe try other foods along those lines. i'm sure you have already thought of pretty much everything under the sun.
When I was a kid I would eat any and everything, there was no food that I wouldnt eat. But I also had chronic ear infections, sinus infections, strep throat etc...my taste buds werent really working so that is why I would eat anything. After I had my tonsils and adnoids out and I could taste, I stopped eating. I think my mom said I would eat toast and cottage cheese. for months and months that is all I would eat. I lost about 15 pounds, which is a lot for a 6 year old. It took years for me to be able to try new things. I am still very much a texture person. Like, I love the way banana's taste but I cannot eat them, I cant stand the mushy texture. Not sure if any of this helped, but i'll pray that ya'll are able to help him soon.

I don't know how my daughter lived from 1 to 2 years. Literally, she barely ate. After she turned 2, she continued to get better and better each month and now eats 3 good meals a day. We bought Carnation Instant Breakfast and she had that and V-8 fruit splash so she could get a serving of fruits and vegetables in. Other than that, she didn't eat a whole lot, usually we could get 1 meal in her. I gave her what she did eat, but always offered her everything everyone else had. I hope he starts eating for you!

Have you read the book, "What's eating your child" by Kelly Dorfman?
I found that really informative in thinking about picky eating in a different way. It talks about how pickiness can be the result of allergies or nutritional deficiencies rather than just a behavior problem. I found the book at my library.

My 5 year old is picky picky as well. She went through a phase where she would eat nothing but vegetables (no pasta, no meat, just vegetables) for me. She would eat better for the babysitter though. One day at about 2 1/2 she decided she would eat meat again, but no vegetables. (She would eat yogurt, bananas, unhealthy stuff etc). At 5, her list of will eat foods is far outnumbered by the list of won't eat foods. This is the child that won't eat fruit snacks or any cereal except Cinnamon Toast Crunch and even that is a fight. I have to pack her lunch for school everyday. And everyday, she gets the same thing....a jello pudding (with milk in it since she won't drink milk), a juice and a cheese sandwich. I can put Cheezits, Goldfish, pretzels, Ritz crackers or Hershey kisses in it as a snack too, but no other real variations. She does eat apple slices but one day I put too much lemon juice on them to keep them from turning brown and now she wont eat them. Occasionally, I can get a banana in there but if it gets bruised between the time it goes in and the time she eats lunch, it comes back completely bruised.

My son on the other hand was a great eater until about 3 1/2. I am not sure if it is a separation issue since sister went to school, but it started about the same time. He does eat dinner for me pretty well as long as sister doesn't say ew.

I do make my daughter eat 5 peas, 5 lima beans, 5 pieces of corn or 2 pieces of broccoli (the only real vegetables I can cook since hubby is also picky about vegies) at dinner so she can at least try them. After about 3 months of this, she will begrudgingly eat corn and broccoli. The peas and lima beans are still a fight.

Good luck. You are not alone

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this struggle. My youngest (2 years old) is dependent on a feeding tube. Long story...(born with food allergies and a heart defect (TOF) The heart failure until her open heart surgery at 8 months old made her too worn out to ever eat enough to thrive, then she had an NG tube in her nose from 5 months to 11 months old which made her eating worse. So she has had the g-tube for over a year now. It is a slow process for something I assumed was natural (my four year old is picky now, but was always a good eater from the start.) I would DEFINITELY suggest he be evaluated to receive feeding therapy from a SLP (Speech Language Pathologist). It has been helpful for us. She gets feeding therapy once a week. Those that specialize in feeding are really good about helping kids overcome their aversions and learn the techniques of eating different types and consistencies of foods.

Hang in there!

E.