Not a Kid Related Question...

Updated on March 02, 2011
O.R. asks from Palmdale, CA
21 answers

I have been battling with my weight for the past few years and after I had my twins I was the heaviest I've ever been. I began working out slowly, walking, elliptical, Jazzercise etc. and eating smaller portions. I saw results and then I slipped up...once..twice and now I've gained all the weight I lost plus more. I feel so lost and need motivation that I can start my healthy habits again. Sometimes I just feel like"oh well im a married mom now and there is no reason to sacrifice for my appearance" but then afterwards I feel horrible. Any advice? Anyone been here before?

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M.C.

answers from Las Vegas on

Weight Watchers! It is wonderful, it teaches you what to eat, how much to eat and is a great motivater to get moving! If you can't get to the meetings, you can do online meeting. Lost 35 lbs already and working on reaching my goal of 50 lbsl. The support is amazing!

Best of luck, M.

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C.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

As much as I can't STAND Kate Moss she was once quoted as saying "nothing tastes as good as thin." She's kinda right. I've lost the same 80 pounds twice and I'm working on it ONE MORE TIME and I only have one child! GRRRR!

Once I figured out that "comfort food" REALLY DOES NOT COMFORT you but makes you even more UNCOMFORTABLE!

This time I FINALLY got it right. I dropped the diet soda and replaced it with LOTS of water with some fiber mixed in. (I buy the cheap sugar free stuff at Wal Mart.)

Diet soda was a HUGE trigger for me. All I wanted was sweet and saly food. I'm now addicted to Crystal Light!

Another thing is I try to THINK about what I'm eating. They said you get the most taste out of food in the first three bites and then your tastebuds tire. I try to REALLY enjoy smaller portions and it's worked. I try to think "do I REALLY NEED that chocolate? Will is REALLY help me or this situation?"

Thinking about food in a positive way also helps. Thinking of things as "good" or "bad" justs messes up your brain.

Charting your weight is super helpful. I use www.fitday.com It's FREE!

Just this morning I was so proud that I could keep up (running) with my son. A year ago that was just a dream. Baby steps, that weight didn't show up overnight and it's not going away overnight.

3 moms found this helpful

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

O R -
As a lot of people on this website know, I have BEEN there mama!! I am there now.
About a year and a half ago my husband and I decided to be "healthier". I signed up for the gym, changed our diet, and we felt GREAT! Me especially. I started out at 420lbs and within approx nine months had lost 105lbs. I was a sexy mama! (which probably makes some people cringe because I was still very heavy!) But, I felt great. Then I got pregnant.
Gained about 80lbs with my pregnancy and after I had her was up 50lbs from before I got pregnant. That's where I am now.
My daughter is 7 weeks old and I got the go ahead from my OB to get back to the gym, taking it easy of course. So, last night was my first night back. I am no where NEAR where I was before the pregnancy...BUT, I am not as bad as I thought I would be! lol It's hard for me because I am nursing and therefore RAVENOUS in the afternoon.
Here's what I have to do. #1. Get all unhealthy food out of the house. Chips, cookies, chocolate, crackers...all of it...OUT! If its in my house I will eat it. It takes a bit more to get the 8 year old, 5 year old and 7 week old in the car to get to the store, so as long as it's not in my house I wont eat it.
#2. Get moving. Whether you are taking the dog on walks, walking around your block, swimming, or joining a gym...move your butt! Get some great music on your Ipod (or whatever) and boogie while you are moving. #3. Drink more water. Take all soda out of your diet and make sure you are getting at LEAST 8 glasses a day.
O R I guarantee you that if you just do those three things the weight will come off.
Now, onto the "oh well, I am married. I totally get that. My husband married me at about 340lbs (GASP!! The HORROR!) and loves me. But, my weight was getting in the way of things. Fitting in booths at restaurants, sitting in movie theaters, going outside with the boys and playing. Lots of things! So, you don't need to "look" better you need to be healthier. I know that when I lose this weight again I will be a bit "saggy". But oh well. I will also have a great blood pressure, no risk of diabetes, and my joints wont hurt in the morning. I too feel like you. It's a lot of work. It's sacrifice. it's for the rest of my life. bleh. But, then I think to how great I was feeling before the pregnancy and I want to get back to that. In fact, I want to be BETTER than that.
You CAN do it!! Just because you slip up one day or two doesn't mean you can't get back to it on the third day.
L.

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E.M.

answers from Honolulu on

Well I am cheering for you. My advice is to let yourself splurge regularly. Actually put a days on the Calender and give the diet a day off every so often. We are not made to work all the time we need to rest regularly and that includes the diet. The Bible says we should rest and delight in Him and His creation once a week. God made Ben and Jerry's icecream and a bunch of greasy bad for me foods... I might as well delight in one of them once a week and dieting is hard work... rest once a week...

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R.M.

answers from Topeka on

OH my....Been there...Done that...in fact I am there right NOW!!! I really worked hard a couple of years ago and lost over 50 lbs...felt better than I had in YEARS!!! Then we went on a 2 week vacation and I slipped...more than once...and put a few pounds back on...and then when I got home it seems hard to get back into the swing of things...and I had also seemingly hit one of those dreaded "plateaus"...I kept slipping and eventually gained all of the weight back plus a few pounds. I am SO upset with myself...I promise myself each night as I go tomorrow that "tomorrow"I Will start all over"...of course Tomorrow hasn't arrived yet.
I wish I knew what to tell you...I do know that the desire and the power to really stick with a diet has to come from within ourselves....if I knew how to tap into that I would be able to make enough money to hire a chef who would cook only diet friendly delicious foods for me and a personal trainer to help me get back into shape!! lol.
I don't really have any advice or ideas for you...just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. I hope that each of us finds that inner strength and desire to get back into shape again!!
Good luck to you and God Bless

3 moms found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Losing weight is so hard. I'm going through it myself right now (for the 4th or 5th time since having my last child 8 years ago). It's a constant battle of lose 20lbs, gain 20lbs. Each time I put something in my mouth that is fattening I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt, *even* if it's ONE tiny Hershey's Kiss after 2 weeks of no sweets at all. People who've never had to struggle with their weight (talking about MY mom and sis) have no clue. They keep saying things like "Just cut back a bit. Don't COMPLETELY deprive yourself, just have one cookie instead of 5." They don't get that if I have *just one* cookie, it starts a downward spiral into eating the whole box. I cannot JUST HAVE ONE, I KNOW myself. So I totally understand where you're coming from.

So here's how I motivated myself THIS time around (and hopefully, once I lose this weight, it's the LAST time, I'm getting too old for this!) I got myself a cute new haircut and went makeup shopping for a little mini-makeover where I could see IMMEDIATE results. Feeling a bit better about myself, I started eating more fruits and veggies and cut out ALL unhealthy sweets (really, I'm a complete sugar addict, cold-turkey was the ONLY way). This gave me more energy to have better workouts. I started weight training as well as cardio. Within a couple of weeks, I could actually see a tiny bit of definition in my deltoids. Little by little, the weight's been coming off and THAT makes me even more motivated to keep going.

YOU CAN DO THIS! Start with a mini at-home facial, do your nails, do SOMETHING that will show you an immediate physical improvement. Take that little boost and use it to motivate you into working out tomorrow. Then keep going. Read fashion magazines, get a bit obsessed with your "image", just because you're a married mom doesn't mean you can't look GREAT. And what'll happen is that while you'll start LOOKING better, you'll also start FEELING better, stronger, healthier. You'll have more energy and the entire family will benefit! Don't give up - you are destined to be a hot mama and you CAN make it happen!

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T.B.

answers from Bloomington on

I am at my heaviest now also, but I'm working on it! I began by committing to just 20 minutes of exercise a day. Once I put my boys down for a nap, that is the first thing I do. Once you start, and stick with it for a week or so, you start to feel better and it encourages you to make little changes. I stopped drinking soda and began watching portion size (not going back for seconds or not getting one more piece of pizza). Once you start to see results, you'll get motivated to keep it up.
I don't know the gender of your children, but I have 2 boys. I have vowed that I will keep up with them. My oldest loves sports already and I want to practice with him, not stand on the sideline. I do not want to be the "fat Mom!"
You can do it, and it will be so worth it!

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N.S.

answers from Austin on

In the midst of it right now, battling for months to lose weight! I am at my heaviest, about 45lbs over my ideal weight. You have to find a way to be passionate about it, that's all I can say. It may sound silly, but everytime I lose motivation-I read up on the dangers of heart disease and diabetes, I look at the risk factors based on family history, I look at pics of myself when I was younger, firmer, and happier, and I think about the importance of being around and healthy for my son's life. Those are the only things that help me put down the cookie, and drive to the gym! It's a battle for sure, but know that there are lots of us out here battling with you!

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S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had some success with Jenny craig when I was in your shoes. (I've got twins too... it's really hard to stay on track when you're so busy and tired) Most recently though, I've noticed that my issues are abusing food... using it to medicate, relieve boredom, stress, etc. I started an online program that is a faith based weight loss program: settingcaptivesfree.com "the Lord's table" If you are a woman of faith it's a really hard look at our attitude toward food, how it relates to your beliefs as a Christian and how to make life long healthy attitudes toward food. Good luck to you from one struggler to another!

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S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I strongly recommend you visit sparkpeople.com
If you want to diet, it will help you set your calorie suggestion and input and track all the food you eat to keep you on track. And there are a lot of great recipes.
If you want to exercise, it will set goals for you and give you suggested routines, etc.
Plus there are lots of articles and information on diet, exercise and healthy living in general.
Plus lots of support groups.
I love this site. I even have their app for tracking food and finding recipes on my phone.
I haven't been very active lately - but I do need to get back on! LOL
My username is SUZMOMOF3

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R.M.

answers from Cumberland on

I think we were separated at birth! I , too, have let myself slip-but just recently-I feel as though I have turned a corner-I guess with spring coming and the fact that I don't own a pair of pants that fit-I had better get motivated. I am watching what I eat-and gradually will be thinking about---the treadmill! Good luck-just start over-you're young-you will have an easier time and get results faster than I will! Take a leisurely walk everyday-you will be amazed.

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J.C.

answers from Lincoln on

You sound like every other woman in America, so you are not alone. The key is to realize its about health, not appearance. You don't want to be the sickly mom, you don't want to die before seeing your grandchildren, you don't want your children to watch you go through disease like diabetes or cancer or many other life-altering diseases. Decide you are going to be healthy, that will put the focus where it should be. Now here's a way for you to get healthy.

The ideal diet is very simple an easy to follow. You don't have to count calories or buy special food, but you do have to commit to being healthy. The ideal diet is basically the opposite of the way most people eat, but if you want to be free from excess fat and disease, this is the way to do it.

Eat 3 meals a day, when you eat divide your plate into 3rds. One third is protein, one third is vegetables, and one third is fruit. Each serving should be the size of your fist or less. In addition make sure you get some good fat throughout the day (nuts, natural nut butters, avocados, olives, olive oil). Carbohydrates (pasta, bread, rice, sugar, etc.) should be limited. When you do choose to eat a few carbohydrates try to choose things low on the glycemic index. (you can look them up at glycemicindex.com)

There you go, simple to remember and it will help you reach and maintain your optimum weight while improving your overall health immensely. No need to pay an exuberant amount to anyone. If you want more information, like why this is the ideal diet, I recommend Dr. Hotze's book Hormones, Health, and Happiness.

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D.J.

answers from Atlanta on

All you need is a little motivation. Because if you did it once, you can do it again girl! It is hard to loose weight but so easy to gain it. I know because I once was in a situation similar to yours. If you feel that you cannot do it alone, go and join a weight loss group like Weight Watchers or something. Thats what I did. It really motivated me there because I was surrounded by other people who was on the same journey that I was. You can do this..dont let yourself go just because you are married. Best of Luck To YOU

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S.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

First I need to share this...they say 60% of losing weight is what you eat, 25% is strength training, and 15% is cardio. So, I agree with so many others that best place to start is to start logging what you eat and keeping track of calories.

Now to answer your question...I completely understand you lack of motivation. I've been there oh! too many times! I feel overwhelmed by everything else I need to do that adding weight loss, journaling my food, exercise, etc. into my day is burdensome and tiring. It's hard to find motivation. Sometimes I think, "Who cares about being fat! At least I would have a decent wardrobe instead of too many things in my closet I can't wear because I think I'll lose the weight one day. And, at least I can stop stressing about this part of my life and enjoy the rest of it." But then I learn I slow down a lot, I feel horrible, and the threat of so many diseases compounds my angst. This time around I was unmotivated to begin journaling my food, but I did it anyway. In my mind, I fought it, but still followed-through with the right thing. I found that as I journaled for a couple of I started getting motivated and feeling better and having more energy. I then became more focused and driven to do this weight loss thing once again.

In the past, I found Weight Watchers to be a huge help. There was something about the accountability of weighing in each week that kept me motivated. And, doing something new and mastering it is quite exciting. Unfortunately, this worked after I had my first child, but for whatever reason it did not keep me focused after I had my second child. But, it could work for you.

The bottom line is the motivation needs to come from within you! No one else is going to spark that drive. But, there may be some support groups or something else that kicks you into gear. (BTW...there are many free online program to log calories, etc. I use livestrong.com.) Good luck!!!

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C.B.

answers from Reno on

I'm not quite in the same boat, but I wanted to share what I've done. I have three kids and am 20 pounds heavier than I want to be. I'm 2 dress sizes bigger than I want to be. Everyone keeps saying it gets harder and harder as you get older so I figured if I wanted something to change, I should do something about it. That's the message I "say" to my kids and I want to set a good example.

I work in an office and litterally do nothing but sit all day. My husband made me up an eating plan that fits that activity level. I also don't like good things like yogurt and cottage cheese and the like. It really puts a damper on dieting.

Anways, my diet plan at first was
English Muffin, Turkey Burger and piece of cheese (or cereal with 1-2% milk) and Hard boiled egg for breakfast
Slim Fast or granola bar for snack
Pita Bread, piece of cheese, turkey burger or hamburger and a small salad for lunch
Granola bar or almonds for snack
and a reasonable dinner
The trick with dinner was portion size. No finishing the kids meals and no going back for seconds.
Plus water and tea

What helped me was knowing that I only had to wait 2 hours to eat again if I wasn't satisfied. Also with sweets, I've heard the 3 bites trick. Your sweet tooth should be satisfied by 3 bites, but total avoidance (at least for a while) is probably a good thing.

My goal was 1 pound per week. I've been doing it since January 1 and I hit 10 pounds today after a 2 week plato at 9 pounds.

Remember: It's OK to screw up. It's OK to fall off the wagon. The trick is to get back on and try again. You are never alone in your struggle.

Keep us posted in your journey.

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

try keeping a journal and see what you are actually eating and more importantly how much. Once you do this for a week, you can begin to see where at what time you have your weakest moments.. could be you don't eat enough during the day and by night are famished and then you consume too much for that time of day... with twins, I am thinking that perhaps you need more fuel during the day , so a bigger breakfast might be good for you and will give you the energy needed.. also, I heard a person say.. it's easier to cut back on 500 calories than it is to exercise it off.... which ever eat something and think , oh I will run or walk this off and then bam.. you don't.. so even if it's 200 calories a day and the next time you might want to reach for a candy bar for example, think about that quote... I've been doing that and will say, it has helped me to rethink IF I want to indulge or not....

best of luck to you

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G.R.

answers from San Diego on

Look into the HCG diet. I did it. It was hard but doable.

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

This has happened to me a number of times. Weight Watchers is the only thing that keeps my on track. The meetings and writing down what you eat every day help you stay focused. Check it out when they have free sign up.

Good luck!

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H.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

MANY MANY MANY of us have been there (or are there now)... It is hard to stay motivated with a busy life and kids. I know I struggle too. I was an athlete in high school and college but now I am in school and working and have two kids and a husband. My advice: get all of the "junk food" temptation out of the house, walk or ride bikes with your family kids (perhaps before or after dinner) and write down everything you eat (and the calories, if possible) - when I started doing this I realized I was eating far more calories than I thought (ranch dressing can have 2-300 calories alone).
I use myfitnesspal.com (it works on smart phones and on the internet) and it calculates calories etc. for you. Protein is key to my weight loss (35 pounds so far), I eat 40-60 grams of protein a day and drink 60 ounces of water and limit calories to 12-1400 a day (to lose 2 pounds a week).

It is tough - but you can do it, once you lose 10 or 20 pounds and see results it will motivate you to do more. Also joining a support group or weight watchers can be very helpful.

Good luck!

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G.S.

answers from New York on

Get back on your feet and start doing what you originally did. Also, go with Gee's idea. Purchase an ipod, put your favorite music on it and go for it. It is hard, but once you get into the habbit of it you won't stop.
Good luck to you

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S.M.

answers from San Diego on

Been there many times. Right now I am recovering from major surgery and have been feeling sorry for myself and eating what I shouldn't. But the reason to get back on the right path is for your health. And for your kids. They need you to be there while they grow up (and that can be until they are 30 or more). And you deserve to feel good and have a good life. Looks are not the important reason----being healthy and able to enjoy your life are. Oh yes, I am going back to Weight Watchers because that is the only thing that works for me. If money is a problem you could try Overeaters Anonymous . I will be praying for you.

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