Nighttime Potty Issues with 5 1/2 Yr Old

Updated on February 06, 2008
J.G. asks from Elmhurst, IL
26 answers

My 5 1/2 yr old son is still soaking wet in the morning. He has never had a dry night in his life. Sometimes he wets through his clothes but usually not. I have tried restricting liquids but he goes to bed about 1 1/2 hrs after dinner and he has to have his milk with dinner.
We tried a little chiropractic and pressure points but it didn't help. The pediatrician said there is a medication we can try but I don't want to medicate my child for this.
Any suggestions?

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So What Happened?

Hi everyone,

Thank you for so many responses to my bed-wetting question. To summarize, my 5 1/2 yr old is still wet every night and his 3 1/2 yr old brother has recently gone to underwear every night. We are careful to let my son know that this is no big deal and is not his fault.
We have tried: restricting liquids, waking him 2 - 3 times per night, and chiropractic with pressure points.
We have an appointment with a homeopathic practitioner where we will discuss this as well as other questions I have.
I will not medicate.
Maybe in a few weeks I will post that we have passed this milestone. If not, no big deal. This won't last forever!
Thanks again for all of your responses. There were many good ideas.
J.

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C.L.

answers from Chicago on

My son wore pull ups at night until the end of kindergarten. He is almost 9 now and still wets the bed occassionaly. I've discussed it with his pediatrician and a few other Moms, and it seems to be pretty common. We've tried to watch for triggers: when he's REALLY tired, when he drinks too much before bedtime, when he doesn't use the bathroom immediately before bedtime. Keeping on top of these things has cut down on the frequency.

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C.H.

answers from Chicago on

My mother swears by the "bell and pad." She says you have to rent it at a medical supply place. She used it with my brother (over 30 years ago!), but it wakes up your child at the first sign of wetness. She said it takes a week, but my brother (who was a heavy sleeper) was potty trained from that point on. If you use it, please let me know because my son is turning 5 soon and I we are still in pull ups at night.

C. Hesse ###-###-####

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A.

answers from Chicago on

I have a 6 year old who wets the bed...we are currently on medication for this and it seems to be working. We started out with one pill before bed and are up to 2 pills before bed. My son comes from a long line of bed wetters and with this medication he is able to have sleepovers with his friends and it's great. You an also try the buzzer sheet. I think my parents tried it when I was young... don't remember the results. Good luck...and just be positive with your son. It's not his fault.

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J.T.

answers from Chicago on

J.-

I have an 8 year old daughter who wets the bed almost every night. I too was a bed wetter until I was 13, and her dad was a late age bed wetter. My daughter's pediatrican told me that children who's parents were bed wetters at an older age had a 70% chance of being late age wetters themselves.

My mother tried medication, special pads with alarms on them, cutting liquids, waking me up several times a night, you name it she tried it. Nothing worked. I had bunk beds and would generally go through both beds EVERY night. And then suddenly I stopped.

I wouldn't rush to medication either. Perhaps take your son to a urologist to make sure the cause isn't medical. But otherwise I would just stock up on Tide and wait it out.

Good luck!

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B.N.

answers from Chicago on

My son just turned 5 and is doing the same thing. My husband and I are waking him up during the night to go the bathroom and this is helping alot. He is very happy when he wake up in the morning not wet. It is tiring for my husband and I but if it works, we will continue until his body adjust to the changes. This has worked for us but make sure there is nothing medically wrong. My older son experienced the same thing and we did what we are doing now. He finally stopped in about a month. Good luck!

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B.F.

answers from Chicago on

My friends son is older and still wets the bed. He has been on the medicine but it hasn't worked. Have you gotten any tests done? Mabye bladder tests?

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C.B.

answers from Chicago on

My son who will be 5 on Saturday isn't dry at night either. My 6 year old has been dry since he was 3. I asked the pediatrician too and he didn't seem to be too concerned. He said when his bladder catches up to the rest of his body, he'll be dry. I wish I had a solution, but I agree with you that medication doesn't seem to be the solution. For us it's overnight pull ups and a plastic cover on the mattress for now.

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N.R.

answers from Elkhart on

My son is almost 8 years old and is still having problems. We started him on a program for a deep sleep disorder. We were told it isn't really a bedwetting problem. It is a sleep disorder that causes him to bedwet. Everyone tells you to let them out grow it but that can take a long time for some children. It really takes a toll on their self-esteem. My son has confidence issues in school, that I believe stem from his sleep disorder. I like you did not want my child on medication. My nephew had the same problem and his mom tried meds. She told me they didn't work and they aren't cheap. enuresiscontrolclinic.com is where I found information about the sleep disorder. Check it out. Just read the info. and see if you think it sounds like your son. I do believe it is worth your time. If you have more questions message me.

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A.S.

answers from Chicago on

J.
I would take my son to an urologist for a second opinion. If you are not comfortable with what your pediatrician tells you, then trust your instinct. You are the best person to gauge if something is not right. Don't stop asking questions until you get to the root of the problem and I say great job for not wanting to treat the symptoms!

If you live in or near SE Wisconsin, Dr. Knight is excellent! She is so kind and thorough.

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T.M.

answers from Indianapolis on

Several Moms have already suggested to check for other medical reasons but if you have ruled out any infections, you might investigate hidden allergies (especially dairy, wheat or sugar). I believe it is very important to look for natural solutions so if you are open to that, the following supplements can be helpful in addition to a good multi: alfalfa, probiotic (provides good bacteria into intestines), and vitamin c. If you have any questions or would like to talk about this, send me a message. Good luck.

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A.K.

answers from Chicago on

What time do you eat dinner? If his wetness has to do with only being awake for 1.5 hours after dinner, try moving dinner time earlier so he is awake for at least 2 hours after eating. Have a night time ritual of potty before bed. Try a smaller glass of milk at meal time? I am trying any suggestions that I can think of.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

we just broke our 5 year old of night time wetness about 6 months ago. i started by creating a chart with the days of the week on it and telling him that for every night that he stayed dry we would give him a smiley face and for all the nights he was wet he would receive a sad face and when he had 7 smiley faces in a row he would be rewarded with the v smile game he wanted. we also gave him a good potty habits ribbon and celebrated his success. and i always reminded him of these rewards so he could keep his eye on the prize. every morning we went straight to the chart. we, of course, never give liquids 1 hour to 2 hours before bed time and make sure that he goes potty right before bed every night. it took about 5 weeks to go a full 7 days but after that goal was met he has been completely dry! rewarding the good behavior and not getting angry or disappointed when he relapsed really seemed to work for us. good luck and hang in there. it will happen!

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J.S.

answers from Chicago on

Homeopathic remedies can help with bedwetting. From what i hv heard, over 5yrs old means he s/b not wetting the bed anymore. Hv you tried homeopathic remedies for this yet? Hyland's (they make teething tablets and other great remedies) makes a bedwetting combination remedy. This might help: http://www.hylands.com/products/bedwetting.php
If you try it and it does not, then I recommend seeing a professional homeopath that can help get him back into balance. I see a prof. homeopath in Naperville (as well as my son (3) who has eczema and has been helped tremendously by homeopathy!). Her name is Dr. Josephine Polich (www.dupagehomeopathic.com). YOu can email me offlist if you want to talk more about it.
I also belong to a homeopathy study group that meets monthly if you're interested in studying homeopathy to treat your family for acute (temporary) illness such as colds, etc. Here's our Yahoo! Group: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/NAHSG/
Best of luck!

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K.G.

answers from Chicago on

Do you go in and check on him and notice about what time he's wet? We woke my son up to take him to the bathroom i the middle of the night. He was still mostly sleeping, but we helped him. Once his bladder control got better around 6 he was able to go all night without wetting.

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J.

answers from South Bend on

I have not read all the other responses. I just wanted to let you know that it can be perfectly normal to wet the bed up to the age of 12. Your son's bladder probably still needs to grow. He's probably a deep sleeper. Try not to stress about it. I would still try to restrict liquids- none after dinner. Every few weeks try to see if he's more ready. Sometimes once they are ready, they are just doing it out of habit. Some kind of prize for being dry might help in this situation, a night out for dinner and movie with mom and dad, a special toy, whatever. You might still have a couple more years of this, but it's not his fault. If you try not to stress about it, it's much easier to handle. I wouldn't worry about using medicine for a few more years. Hopefully, he will grow out of it by then. My son just grew out of it after he turned 8. Good luck.

J.

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A.Z.

answers from Chicago on

Wake him up in the middle of the night at least once to go to the washroom. It can be harder to wake up and recognize the need to use the washroom at night. If he he has gone despite waking him up once then do it as many times as necessary to get him through the night dry.

Sometimes all it takes is a nighttime routine so the kid can start to wake up and use the washroom on his own. Boys generally take longer to get the signal down than girls.

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E.R.

answers from Chicago on

Potty Pager worked great for our 5 year old. It vibrates at night when it senses wetness. It vibrates more (harder) the wetter it gets until the child wakes up to use the toilet. Easy to use and night trained our daughter in 3 days. She was so proud of herself! She also kept a flashlight (of her chosing) next to the bed. We had her change the sheets with minimal help and put them in the laundry herself. The combo worked for her.
Mother of 6 year old girl and 4 year old boy

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S.C.

answers from Chicago on

We have the same issue. Our son will be 5 in a couple of weeks and is usually soaked in the morning. I have to wash his sheets a few times a week. Our son sleeps so deeply that he doesn't wake up until it's too late. The general rule of thumb, I've heard, is to not push it. Until it matters to him, don't make an issue out of it. I know that my husbands brother had a bed wetting problem until he was 7 - and it usually biological. If your son is embarrassed by this or wants to stay dry at night, I know they also make an alarm that wakes the child up when they feel wetness. The drug treatments are pretty severe, and I would stay away from them.

Good luck!

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Many boys wet the bed until puberty. My brothers both wet the bed until they hit puberty as well as my husband and one or two of my uncles.

Some things that my mother did was to move dinner up...and they were only allowed a small glass of beverage after they ate. Then they went potty before bed and then mom set her alarm to get them both up twice a night. It took a little while before she figured out their pattern, but that's what she did for years and that's the only way she was able to save herself the trouble of washing sheets everyday.

On a sadder and more serious note...(and mind you this was over 20 years ago) We were military and a doctor suggested a medicine for my brothers that worked wonders. It worked so well that my aunt went to her doctor and asked about it for her son. They put him on it and it did wonders. Then one day he wet his pants in first grade...he was six. His dad gave him a hard time when he got home and called him a baby and so on. That night when his mom was getting the baby ready for bed...he climbed the counter and got in the cabinet. He took the whole bottle of medicine. All anyone can figure is he reasoned to himself that if one pill kept him from wetting the bed...the whole bottle would keep him from wetting in class again. His 3 year old brother watched and he told him not to tell. Later that night he screamed he was falling and when his dad went to see what was wrong little Clifford went into convulsions and stopped breathing. His dad did CPR for 30 minutes until the paramedics arrived, but he never recovered. After about two weeks, several operations to relieve pressure on his brain and several ressusitations...his parents let him go. He turned seven in the hospital. I'll never forget little Clifford. The day my family moved to AZ from SC little Clifford cried and cried and said he would never see his sissy again (me). We tried to reassure him that I would move back, but he couldn't be consoled and his mom said he cried for hours after we drove away. He was right I never saw him again. His dad started drinking heavily after that..he blamed himself until he died at 57 of a massive heart attack. A lady wrote a book about experimental drugs doctors were giving patience without fully disclosing that they weren't fully approved. The military could do that back then without reprucussions. Turned out the drug had built up in his system and by the time he took the overdose he already had so much in his system that even though they pumped his stomach it was too late.

Now I know that laws have changed and so has medicine, but as you seem to have noted in your posting you seem weary of using a drug ...and I agree. Always be weary of using a drug to treat something so insignificant in the whole scheme of things.

Try some of the techniques my mom used and see if you can at least limit the number of times he has accidents. And if I remember milk was a bad beverage for my brothers at night. They always wet the bed with that for some reason. Not sure about that one though. Try another beverage in small amounts.

Good luck...I'm having a baby boy this time and I worry he will inherit my brothers' bedwetting problems....but I guess if that's his only health issue I will be happy.

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S.V.

answers from Indianapolis on

J., We're experiencing the same thing with my 6 yr. old. I just talked to my ped. again in December and they said we can try the meds or they also gave me brochure on a bed-wetting device (it's underwear that have sensors in it and sets off an alarm). We've decided to give him until age 7 (for some reason, I've heard that to be the magic age). Our nephew and the neighbor boy both experienced this and it seemed to stop around age 7. My son has been getting better the last two weeks, he's down to only 3-4 nights a week. I feel your pain (especially the nights where the pull-ups don't hold it all). All that said, I guess my suggestions is: if you don't want to medicate, give him a little more time...this is pretty normal for boys.

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A.H.

answers from Chicago on

Try this... Get him up just before you go to bed,like after you've brushed your teeth, and put him in front of the toilet (on his step if he uses one) and run a little warm water on his hand. The warm water should make him pee and then he should be able to stay dry for the rest of the night.

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D.S.

answers from Chicago on

I would try not to worry. When my daughter was still soaking a pull-up every night, my pediatrician told me that neurologically, she just wasn't ready, and to give her time. I had even tried having her sleep in her underwear instead of a pull-up, hoping that waking up soaking wet a few times might get her to be more aware of the need to go. I realized that wasn't working (and I got tired of changing the sheets). She was a very heavy sleeper. She'd sometimes soak through the pull-up and then sleep for another couple of hours. The wetness wouldn't even wake her up. Then at around 5 1/2, we noticed that she had gone several nights dry. And that was it - we were done with the pull-ups. She has wet her bed maybe twice since then(she's now 6 1/2). My son is four, and he stays dry all night. Remember that every child is different. Good luck and hang in there.

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L.J.

answers from Chicago on

Hi J.,
What if you set your alarm every night around 1:00am or so and go wake him up to go to the bathroom? Eventually, maybe his own internal clock will kick in and wake him up. Just a suggestion.
Lisa

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T.M.

answers from Terre Haute on

The medicine your doc mentioned is probably desmopressin. Before you dismiss it, you might want to research it. My son used it. He had no side effects at all and did just wonderful on it. I was always the kind of parent that felt guilty for cutting out liquids. Not much worse than being thirsty and having nothing to drink. The desmopressin did the trick. My oldest is now 9 yrs. old and is doing perfectly fine. You don't have to leave them on the meds, after maybe a month you can take them off and see how they do. Also, if I remember correctly, the med is very cost friendly. Good luck! Shannon

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G.H.

answers from Chicago on

What time does he eat at night? An hour and a half is more than enough time for him to potty before sleep. Have dad take him to the bathroom and show him how"big boys go potty". Have child go potty just before bed. If he can't go, trickle the sink water, it helps adults! You can get him up 2 hours after falling asleep. praise him and tell him what a big boy he is and put him back to bed. Try for a few nights. It should help.
Jeanne from Elk Grove Village, Il

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