Night Time Potty Training - Temecula,CA

Updated on April 15, 2008
J.R. asks from Temecula, CA
24 answers

I have a 3 1/2 year old son who has been potty trained for about a year now. It was very easy to potty train him, it literally just took a weekend (with a few accidents here and there). Anyway, we unfortunately still use diapers at night (and ocassionally nap time). We try and limit his drinking, smaller drinks, stopping drinks after dinner and of course we have him go to the bathroom as often as we can. He still wakes with a wet diaper and most of the time, it is really wet! Ocasionally he takes his diaper off in the middle of the night (cause it itches) and we end up with a real mess in the morning. Any thoughts or ideas out there? Or will he just grow out of it?

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So What Happened?

I want to thank everyone for their input, it is really nice to know that others have had the same issues. As for now I think I am just going to let it be.. and just give it another year or so.. For those of you that may be concerned, we always praise him when dry and we don't make a big deal when he messes.. we just say its an accident and clean it up.. Anyway, thanks again.. At this point I don't feel it is a "problem".

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A.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

The problem could be that he doesn't have that signal in his brain to go to the potty at nighttime.

The old school way of teaching children to wake up to go to the bathroom is to wake them up in the middle of the night and walk them to the potty and have them sit on it and pee or poop and then go back to bed.

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J.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi J.!

I am having the exact same problem with my three year old daughter. If you get some great feedback--can you post it in the "what happened" section--or forward them on to me.
Thank you so much!! I am doing all the same things you are---and she wakes up soaked.

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

J.,

I know there are people out there who will tell you to just let him have some accidents in the middle of the night, but I firmly believe that when they are ready, you will know. My daughter is 4 1/2 and while I am tired of her needing the pull up at night, she isn't ready to give it up. I've spoken with my pediatrician and other's and they all say that when she's ready, she'll have a lot of dry pull ups...sometimes a child's bladder isn't big enough to go all night until 6 years old. Yes, frustrating, I know, but I'd rather her be comfortable than not.

Hope that helps. Good luck with #2! I hope you have an easy delivery!

S. :)

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J.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

We just went through the same thing with our son, who turned 4 in Feb. He was day potty trained easily several months before he was 3, but night, forget it. So far we have limited his drinking before bed, and then we wake him up to go potty around 11 p.m. or so. He now is dry through the night, (and in underwear) but we have not yet tried NOT waking him up to use the bathroom. He has only had a few accidents, and he seems to know right away because he comes in to tell me. So, we're still working on it.
Another thought, with baby coming, maybe you should just wait. Keep him in the diaper until the new sib has been around and he has adjusted. Forcing the issue right now might seriously backfire. Good luck!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

3.5 years is still young, meaning LOTS of kids this age are still going through this. It's okay.
Remember, their bladders are tiny too. Be sure to not put too high expectations on him or pressure. Night time dryness, 100% of the time does not happen perfectly.It's okay. My daughter, now 5 years old, still has occasional accidents at night still. Over the past year, is when she finally stopped wearing the night time diapers. Also, when they sleep so soundly...they don't always wake up to go to the toilet. It's okay.

What I do is put a waterproof bed pad under her when she sleeps, THEN, if there is an accident, it is easier to clean up as I don't have to wash the entire bedding set. If she does have an accident, we just go about cleaning it up, yes, in the middle of the night, but don't make it emotional or confrontational or embarrassing for her. All kids have accidents, even when they are much older. So, for your question as to whether they will "grow out of it"... well, yes and no. They do get better at night time dryness, but they will have accidents sometimes too. I even know a friend's child who is 7, and he still has accidents once in a while.

Also, children do not have full 100% "impulse control" yet...so keep that in mind. Yes, some kids do better than others. But each child is different.

He will get better at night time control sooner or later. He is still young. You can always check with your Pediatrician to make sure he doesn't have any bladder problems, "immature bladder" kind of thing. But I would just chalk it up to he is still "transitioning" to night time control ability. Transitions can take time. It's okay. It's great he has daytime control. Hooray for the little guy. :) I hope my 19 month old son will be that way... he already "tells" me when he has to pee, but have decided not to "rush" him to full potty training yet.

Oh, there are also "training pants" that perhaps you can use, instead of "diapers" which may be more comfortable for him. They are usually cloth, with a built-in "pad" to absorb the pee etc. But yes, it is washable, waterproof and leak proof. You can even find them on E-bay for cheaper in multi-packs. Just type in the search word "training pants." I got my son these and it's great.

Congrats on your soon to be baby! How wonderful!
Good luck and just wanted to share what I've known and gone through with a now older child.
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

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S.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

We just potty trained our 3yr old daughter about two months ago. Within the last two weeks I stopped the pull ups at night time. I explained to my daughter that she can not pee-pee in her bed and so far so good. The few times that she needed to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night she got up and did so. Her and I went to babies r us and purchased an extra waterproof pad so if she did have an accident it would not go down to her mattress. My mother-in-law always told me that it takes 3 weeks to create a habit and 3 weeks to break one with a child. Maybe you should put him in his big boy underwear and just wake up in the middle of the night and get him up to go potty. Sometimes it's more the inconvenience for us that stops them from learning.

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V.A.

answers from Santa Barbara on

Hi J.,

I'm sorry it's such a mess sometimes but it will pass. There may be regression during the day when the baby is born, as well, but that is perfectly normal. Don't make an issue of it, just praise him a lot when he doesn't wet. Boys learn later and he may sleep very deeply so he doesn't wake up in time. Try using pull-ups because they may not feel as wet to him and then at least he won't take them off in the middle of the night.

V.

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D.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

They do grow out of it. I tried two methods, If I got up to go I would wake him up and make him go too. But I also would use a diaper pad used by hospitals for seniors and that help alot too, less laundry. Hope this helps

D. K.

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E.N.

answers from San Diego on

My son just turned 3. He has been day time potty trained for a few months and we decided to take off the diaper for naps and bedtime about a week ago. His diapers were very wet and sometimes he would take them off in the morning, but I felt he was ready (or at least I was ready to try it out and see if he was). We talked to him about it beforehand telling him this was a very exciting step because he was a big boy and didn't need diapers anymore. He had one accident in the middle of the night on the second night, but other than that he had made it through every nap time and the night without going to the bathroom or wetting his bed, but he has to go first thing when he wakes up. When the diaper was there, he used it (and it would be very wet), but since it is gone, he knows to go to the bathroom. My sister told me it was the same with her daughter. If the diaper was there, she used it, but when the diaper was gone, she knew what to do. Maybe you could try eliminating the diaper at nap time. I don't know if it confuses him to use it sometimes, but I would say to get rid of it alltogether at nap time and see how he does. I think kids are ready at all different ages so don't worry if he doesn't seem to be ready.

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N.G.

answers from Visalia on

It will take a couple of nights with out sleep.
so plan this for a weekend. Set your alarm and go wake him up ever 1-2 hours and put him on the pot. This will help.
Make SURE you don't give him liquids2 hours before bed. Tell him sorry , when he can have a dry night he can have a sip of water. after a few night of the 1-2 hours nightmare ... then go to every 4 hours. until he is sleeping through the night without wetting his pants. Its not fun, but it works.
N.

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H.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

My niece wore a pull-up in bed till she was almost 6, and she is just your average healthy girl. The ped. says nighttime wetness isn't something you can train, it just happens when they are ready. He'll eventually start waking up dry, truly!

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L.H.

answers from San Diego on

You know, I think it probably has a lot to do with the fact that he potty trained so early. I think most boys start at around 3-ish so maybe since he got started so soon, he wasn't ready to handle it all at once. I know this may sound like a crazy idea, but I think using underwear at night is the way to go. Kids don't like to feel wet and with underwear they get that sense of wetness and I think it wakes them up and makes them more aware of what's going on. Diapers absorbe a lot of the wetness and isn't as umcomfortable so I think it ends up being kind of a crutch. I think the main reason we use them is because we don't want to do clean up every night and I get that. But, I think that if you suffer thru it a few nights it will prob help with nightime dryness issues. I think it's like anything, like getting your kids to sleep in their own beds, getting rid of bottles or pacifiers-sure there are a bunch of ideas on how to make these transitions, but in the end-going about it the tough cold turkey way is the way to go.

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J.D.

answers from Reno on

It's perfectly normal for a child to take longer to stay dry at night. Just be patient, and he will eventually be dry when he wakes up. :)

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D.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

put his big boy underwear on and tell him that when he feels like going at night, to get up and walk himself to the restroom (make sure he's not afraid of the dark and has sufficient night light and have the potty ready for him to get to). And of course, put a bed pad (water proof is better for us moms and dads). HE WILL wet his bed but he won't like it. In 2-3 nights, he will hate it and will make sure himself that he gets up in time.

We were did this with my 3 year and 2 month old son. there was a time when I just got tired of changing the bed sheets, so we decided to put a diaper on for the night (but never at nap times because we didn't want him to think it was okay to pee during your sleep). We say diapers no pull ups because be didn't want to reward his behavior with pull-upss (pull-ups have always been a novelty for him, while diapers are for "babies". We say not at nap times because we recognized that he was wetting the bed because he was in too deep a sleep to wake up and when he would wake up from needing to go pee, he could not make it to the potty in time.

After a while, he would beg us not to put diapers on him. He did not like the feeling. And also, when he had the diapers on, we still tell him not to pee in bed and kept reminding him to wake up and pee in the potty. After a couple weeks of going to bed with a diaper, the diapers were always dry in the morning and he would get up in the middle of the night saying he needed to go potty (even though he had diapers on.)

Good luck and wishing you diligence and perseverance.

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H.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son just turned 6 and we still have issues. I have started to use the nighttime pull ups. Which are usually dry but we still have issues when he is really wet. Regular pullups would sometimes not hold enough of the wetness. Just advice to avoid waking up and having to change sheets!
Good luck!

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T.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My boys had a harder time with night time training that my daughters. Something to do with the boy parts I guess. What we resorted to was he pottied at his bedtime (8p) and then when we were ready for bed (@10:30/11p) we would take him potty again - he would always go and not really wake. We then set our alarm clock for a few hours later (1a - 2a) and take him again - he again, would always go. This went on for about 2 weeks. After that, he learned to feel when he needed to get up and go by himself. We no longer had to watch his intake before bed etc...Hope it works for you too! Good luck & God Bless You!

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L.A.

answers from San Diego on

Don't think of it as "unfortunate" that he still wears a diaper at night... it is absolutely normal!! He will grow out of it. Don't make an issue out of it. Don't limit his fluids - hydration is important. You might limit dairy drinks before bedtime. Other than that, don't worry about this. He will be dry at night by the time he is 5. Even if he turns out to be a bed wetter (it is usually hereditary) he will grow out of it in adolescence.

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L.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wouldn't worry about it. My daughter was like this, too. The pediatrician told me that some kids are just heavier sleepers than others. I tried putting my daughter in underwear so that she'd feel it when she urinated and learn to wake up. No such luck. My three year old son is the same way. Since my older child did eventually grow out of it, I'm not as worried (I don't remember the exact age, but it seems like it probably won't be too long). Next time your son has his physical, you can always ask about it, but I wouldn't make a special appointment or feel too worried.

If you want, you could give a little reward on mornings he happens to wake up dry. I know my cousin that for her three year old. Again though, her daughter is a lighter sleeper.

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H.C.

answers from San Diego on

I did the following: We had our girls go the bathroom right before they went to bed, no diapers but the thicker kind of underwear and a pad under their sheet (just in case), and however (either my husband or I) went to bed last, picked the girls up and carried them to the bathroom and onto the potty and had them go pee. Sometimes it took a couple of minutes before the actually went and while we were waiting for them to go, we told them that it was time to go pee. Most of the time they didn't really wake up. We had great success with that method.
Good luck and I know it is hard, but wants they have it down, it will be as easy as pie ;-) And no more diapers, just underwear ...

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

My 4 year old son is a bed wetter. I talked to his doc. and he said that it is totally normal for him to be wetting the bed at this point. He said that they go into such a deep sleep that the feeling of needing to go or even wetting the bed will not wake them. He called it somthing but I can't remember. He also said that once they reach about 7yrs (if I remember right, but right around that age) and are still wetting the bed that it may be a genetics thing. It's more of a hassle for you then a problem. I wouldn't worry. But, I agree on the advice from one of the other mothers about having him wear underwear instead of a diaper to bed. That might be the solution for your son. Good luck.

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S.R.

answers from San Diego on

Hi J.

First of all...congrats to your 2nd little one coming soon!!!

My daughter just got out of her night time pull ups 2 weeks ago and she is 4 1/2. So it's whatever schedule they're on!

She used to like going to bed with a sippy cup on her night stand. We changed it to those cute little paper cups with animals you find at the grocery store that hold like 2 sips. My daughter loved that she had her own cups and never even notice she was only getting a tenth of what her sippy cup held. One thing...you have to double up the cups or they'll leak!

Other than that...it worked like a charm!

Good Luck...S.

http://www.workathomeunited.com/betterforyou
http://www.livetotalwellness.com/betterforyou

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T.C.

answers from San Luis Obispo on

Hi J.,

I have read a number of he responses that people have sent you. One the many people did not consider is the bedwetting issue. Many children have this problem. Each child develops at their own pace, but often times, boys take longer to stay dry at night. Also, bedwetting is more common among boys. Typically this problem is a genetic problem. I would not try and "train" your son yet. This is some thing that his body will eventually be able to do. But there might even be times when his bladder can not keep up with his fluid intake. The bladder grows slower than the rest of their body sometimes.

My third child (a boy) had issues with staying dry during the night. It is a huge hastle to change the bedding every morning and it ruins the blankets if you need to wash them every day. I would wait until your son keeps his diaper/pull up dry, then that is when you tackle this next step in his development. Do not push the issue and don't say, "only babies wear diapers" etc. It is not anything to be ashamed of to wear a pull up for the nighttime. I would try and see how he does at nap time though....depending on how long he naps (less then 3 hours) he should be able to hold it and not wet his bed. If not, leave him in his pull up a few more months and try it again later. i would check and see how he is doing every two months or so. but also realize that food intake also seems to play a factor in bedwetting. My son is now 11 years old and he even had an accident in the last year. It seems that both of my sons have had issues with eating pizza and soda...then that night they would wet. I am not sure if it was the pizza or soda combined (this was when they were more around 6-8 years old). But both of them seemed to have a problem with that. It might be all of the sodium in the pizza and then they are thirsty, I am not sure, but there was definitely a correlation for both of my boys.

Best of luck, try not to push it.
T.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Congrats on him being potty trained so early and congrats on your new baby that will be here any day!

I've understood that most kids do not ptty train at night until 5 or 6 years old with a few exceptions. Some potty train sooner and some even later. My daughter is 5.5 and soaks her pull ups at night.

Enjoy your new baby!
M.

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T.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

I asked my pediatrician when do kids night time potty train, and she said sometime between 3-5. My son is almost 4 and is finally waking up dry most days, with still some accidents. He will eventually outgrow it, but his body needs to develop to the point where he can either hold it at night, or be wakened to use the potty. That varies for every child.

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