T.O.
Lots of parents that I know can't wait for their child to start school or have a desire to work part-time to "get away" from it. I can say I am the opposite. I love being home with my kids. I babysit now to make extra money, but I still get to spend all day with my children. It isn't for everyone...that I know. Before I started babysitting I felt like we were so chaotic...we really had no schedule so we just did whatever. We might go to the park, Target, the library...there was no routine which had its ups and downs (great to have the freedom, but NOTHING ever got done around the house and I constantly felt like we wasted the day away.) I found a few things helped me out:
* Try to be a little scheduled...every Monday take a Library class, clean the 1st floor of your house before you head out, do your grocery shopping,etc.
* Try the website www.meetup.com. I joined this almost 2 years ago and have met some wonderful moms. It's a site that connects you with different interest groups. I joined one for moms and used to attend playdates, trips to the zoo, etc with different moms before I started sitting. We formed a weekly playgroup...Nice to have something for both you and your child to look forward too.
You'll adjust...it just takes some time. If you're unhappy you could always consider working part-time when your husband is home, although I know you said he has tough hours. Try to find some time during the day for you too...Let her watch Sesame Street while you read, watch a Soap while she naps...or take a nap too! Good luck...I'm sure it will all work out and you'll feel right at home very soon.