Neighborhood Child W/ Stinky Feet

Updated on June 28, 2013
K.W. asks from Parkville, MD
17 answers

My children frequently have some of their neighborhood friends come into our house to hang out. My husband and I kept noticing that there was a bad smell in the house whenever certain children come over. We finally realized that it's the shoes/feet of one girl (10 years old). She wears the same shoes w/ no socks everyday. The smell is so pervasive that we notice it the minute she steps foot into the house and it lingers even when she leaves. My boys (6 and 9) don't seem to notice or be bothered by it, or at least they don't say anything. My husband asked her to leave her shoes outside yesterday without really saying why. Question is- how do we approach this with her? Do we come right out and tell her to get different shoes because the old ones stink? Do we say something to the parents, whom we don't know personally? I don't want to hurt her feelings. She's in my son's class, so I really don't want to make it awkward for them as friends, but something's gotta give. Any suggestions or experience with this?

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D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, K.:

Aren't there products in the market that helps eliminate odors in shoes?

I would get some of the products and teach the child how to take care of her shoes and ask her if she would like to have some socks to wear with her shoes? Buy them for her.

It takes a village to raise a child.

Good luck.
D.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

My son had this with his football shoes and clothes . . . egads it was the most acrid, strange odor. Sometimes I wonder if there wasn't something metabolic going on because it was like nothing else I ever smelled.

I think I'd just tell her she has to leave her shoes outside (don't go into details unless she asks). If she asks just say "sometimes shoes can develop a bad smell and I'm very sensitive to odors."

Since she's not wearing socks her feet are sweating directly into the shoe fabric which tends to be thick.

I think you'll have to be kind but direct.

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☼.S.

answers from San Diego on

I have to say, there is no way in h*Il I would approach a neighborhood parent and tell them that their kid's feet stink. Nor would I tell the child herself to get new shoes because her feet stink! Jeez!!

I think the most you can get away with is asking her to keep the shoes outside before entering your house ...

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F.B.

answers from New York on

Poor kid. Can you make a new house rule where you wil have everyone wear house flip flops? these never go outdoors. The shoes can be lined up by the front/ back door.

Get a big old bucket and like 2 doz pair of flip flops. Clip them together with binder clips, so the pairs don't get separated. Occassionally dump the whole lot in some diluted bleach and then give them a rinse.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

This would be my 6yo daughter. She has sensory issues, so I pretty much let her go without socks when it's not freezing out. This is also the reason she wears the same shoes almost every day during school. It is really really hard to find shoes she will tolerate. The 30-45 minute battle over shoes and socks just isn't worth it. That said, I tell her to wash her feet in the tub when I smell her feet.

You really shouldn't tell her to get/wear different shoes, though. You don't know what her issues are. I would, instead, tell her to leave her shoes outside. You might even make this a house rule for all visitors.

Now that it's summer and she's not in school, my dd can wear flip flops most days. No more stinky feet for a while. Yeah!

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

If you say something to her she might be embarassed. And if you say something to the parents they might not care or get mad or offended. I know my son that is 14 really dosn't care when I tell him his feet stink. Kids tend not to care. You might get some baking soda and sprinkly some in her shoes when she's playing that will help the smell.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

OH my I almost skipped the 'child' part. It could have said neighborhood mom w/stinky feet. Guilty here...tell her to leave the shoes outside and give her some baby wipes to clean them while she is in your house.

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M.O.

answers from New York on

I would let it go. This is an opportunity to model courtesy, tact, and respect for difference. Tell your kids, "People are different in lots of ways. It's the tradition in some areas to take more baths than others. Some people don't have enough money for lots of socks and shoes. And some people have medical problems where their feet sweat a lot. Those can be hard to cure."

And then, please, tell yourself the same thing.

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J.O.

answers from Boise on

I was that child. It was not secret.

I was just told to leave my shoes outside and then to wash my feet. I never had an issue with it. I knew my feet stuck (thankfully that changed as an adult).

I'm not sure what I would do though if it was someone elses kid.

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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

My younger son has a friend with that issue. The kid hates socks and generally goes around completely barefoot, shoving his filthy feet into sneakers when he must. Those sneakers reek like death.

When he comes over to play, I have him leave his shoes outside and wash his feet before he comes in. I told him straight out "Because your feet are killing me." He is fully aware that his barefoot choices make this necessary. It isn't an issue of home life or anything.

A.C.

answers from Huntington on

Ew, I know that smell well! My little girl took off her shoes the other day and I about died! There is no way to allow that kind of smell in your house, it is pretty unbearable. When my kids get that kind of stink, I make them immediately go wash their feet in the tub. Since it is not your child I would probably be a lot less blunt than I am with my kids. I would either make it be an "outside only" kind of day where the kids just play outside and don't bring the lingering smell, or I would require the kids to leave their shoes on the porch and scrub off their feet or at least rinse them in the hose before coming in. I think it would be a-ok to say lightheartedly, "Now that it's summer, we are all getting stinky feet and I would appreciate it if you will rinse off your feet before coming in!" Most kids enjoy playing in the hose anyway.
That's probably as far as I would go with it. It is possible the parents have not quite noticed it or they cannot afford new shoes but I don't know that I would take it upon myself to suggest new shoes or odor spray or anything. Hopefully the kids parents figure it out soon but in the meantime I would not allow the smell in your house. It really does take a while to clear out!

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K.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I ditto Donna S. I was thinking that you could buy a product to eliminate shoe odor, or even baking soda maybe (I don't know about that for sure), and when she comes over, try to be nearby when she takes her shoes off and you can approach her in a joking way. Like "Whoo, that's a stinky shoe, girl!" Obviously with a smile, and more importantly care and concern, and then offer her a way to fix it. "Oh, I have some stuff that will really help with that. How about we go get it and give it a try?"
You could even then go on to mention that wearing socks would help, and be more comfortable.

She may not notice it, or she may actually be self conscious of it, but unable to remedy it without help.

I also agree with Christy, why not throw them in the washer, then set them outside on the porch in the sun to dry.

I think you've got this covered! ;)
Best of luck!
KATIE

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R.B.

answers from Washington DC on

The ideas of flip flops and hose rinsings are great for summer, but eventually it will be too cold for that. If you don't feel comfortable speaking to her parents, an alternative suggestion is bringing your concern to the attention of her teacher or a guidance counselor at their school. School officials regularly call parents regarding hygiene issues, because poor hygiene can lead to bullying, or can indicate neglect in the home.

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

On a day where you know she'll be there for a couple of hours:

"Oh, honey...I think you must have walking in something smelly, because your shoes smell pretty bad! Give them to me and I'll go ahead and wash them."

Then put them in the washer. Use regular detergent, and put white vinegar in the fabric softener dispenser. Extra rinse. Then dry on medium heat in the dryer. Voila! problem solved.

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A.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I suggest just speaking with her parents. Why are we so afraid of just talking to people? Yes, it will be awkward and they might be offended or they might be understanding. But this is a chance to show the kids how to properly handle difficult situations. When I was a kid my mom had an issue with a neighborhood kid and she talked to his parents and our families became good friends. It's also a chance to get to know your neighbor. I still believe most people are still decent. Honestly if you are letting their child spend time in your house, you need to know who they are and they need to know who you are. That's just a safety thing nowadays.

In the meantime, I think the idea of everyone wearing flip flops in your house (you can say it's to keep the carpets nice) or playing outside with the hose before coming in is a great idea. I wouldn't advise washing her shoes or putting anything in them. You don't know if she has any allergies or sensitivities to certain chemicals or products. Also, if she wears the shoes everyday they might not be in the best condition and could fall apart or be damaged if you put them in the washer. Also, I would be pissed if someone washed my kid's shoes. That's basically implying that they are dirty and I'm not doing my job as a mom. And both of these things would lead a discussion with her parents that might not be so pleasant or in the case of parents who are really difficult -- legal actions.

Either way whatever you decide you end up talking to the parents. One way you have the chance that things might turn out to be fine, the other way it's probably going to be a bad scene.

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M.T.

answers from Washington DC on

Does she wear the popular Sperry's? They are horribly smelly - even when new!

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

As, that kid, the one with stinky feet you talk to the parents. In addition, you do not let the kids around her or yourself bare foot it could be due to a fungus.

Talk to the parents, use my advice as something a cousin did if you like ... Lotramin Ultra daily, wash feet with baking soda twice daily, use baking soda in the shoes and store the shoes outside, unless raining. In addition - once the shoes have the funk it's game over. She needs new shoes, socks daily and shoes can not be fake plastic, leather or anything like that. Canvas works best. Oh, and each time she takes off her shoes she needs to wash her feet, and reapply the Lotramin until the fungus is gone.

I can almost 100% promise she has a fungal issue - happens all too often.

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