Need to Hear from My Fellow Caregivers :)

Well, I am not a provider, but I had a similar situation. My daughter had anxiety. She was at the sitters only 2 days a week for about a year and a half. There were times I had so much trouble having her go there. Finally at the end, the last 4 times my daughter went there, she did the same thing - the throwing up thing. My sitter wasn't having it. She told me I had to take my daughter to the doctor (because there was something wrong with her) or she wasn't watching her anymore. I pulled her right out of there. Lucky for me, my mom took her in full time. I have had my daughter go to a couple of friends houses as well for babysitting, and we have had no problems. I beleive it was the anxiety. But - I also think it was the sitter. Not saying you are the problem. This little girl sounds a little worse since it is the 7th sitter. I think the parents have a little bit of a bigger issue on their hands....

Wow. What an unusual situation.

I once had a child in my group who sometimes had huge crying bouts due to separation anxiety, and would throw up because of all the mucus she'd ingested.

I have to be really honest here, SLM, and say that there are a couple things that raise some questions for me. I'm not 100% sure if they are true red flags-- I think you will know that in your gut or not--but here's what stands out to me. First, and foremost, they haven't taken her to the doctor. Why not? What reason would a parent have for not taking their chronically vomitting child to the doctor? This suggests to me that there's a level of parenting awareness that they haven't yet attained, or that there's some stresses at home that they aren't sharing with you. I couldn't guess as to what.

And this falls hand in hand with this little girl having had so many caregivers. Either they are really unaware of how this is affecting their daughter, or they are hiding something and leaving caregivers in order to cover up for their own mistakes. It may be that they are hiring lousy candidates and are slowly figuring their way through finding good care. In any case, this and the fact that they are so willing to go with a less-healthy way of feeding youngsters, whose bodies need snacks, suggests that there's something lacking in experience.

I think the doctor's note is a great way to point them in the right direction. Someone needs to insist that this child get medical care for this before she returns to your care. Give them a short amount of time to do this, and tell them by state guidelines, you can no longer accept her in your care without a doctor's note. There's a 24 hour exclusion policy for vomiting in Oregon, and kids can't return to school until 24 hours after the last bout of vomitting. You could be violating state law in accommodating them, because she's *never* past that amount of time if she's vomitting each morning. She should have been checked long ago.

H.

I want to add: if the parents do decide not to take their daughter in, please call your local child welfare division. There may be something terribly amiss, and a home welfare check would be in order at this point. Not seeking medical treatment for a child with these symptoms is just worrisome to me.

I did daycare out of our home for 8 years before we opened this business and I totally understand where you're concern is. It seems odd to me that she has had SO many providers at such a young age. I think you're right to be leary of the red flag. The only other thing I can think of is that I have noticed a lot of kids at that age think it's fun to play with their gag reflex. Maybe you should let her hang on to her special bag while she is there! I would just say since she is only there for a short time, try to keep a close eye on her just in case there is more to this story than you know so far. Good luck!! I miss doing daycare, but I really don't miss doing daycare!

something sounds funny .. i suggest contacting children services just because she looks well dressed does not mean anything that many providers either mean they aren't paying as should or something is up with treatment of girl.If she is being fed over 2 hrs before she was coming over the food would be partially digested

I would actually recommend handing her a large ziplock to throw up in the moment she comes in. Just show her how "In case you feel sick, just throw up in here, honey." (&/or hold it for her). I did this with one little boy YEARS ago.

Then you just zipper it shut, toss it in the freezer, and you can hand it to the parents at pickup.

NOT in any kind of mean/spiteful way... but so that they can see the size of the food that's coming up (unchewed), and contents (esp helpful in dealing with possible intolerances). AKA as a "helpful" thing for them in dealing with the issue. Let them know that you'll work with her on chewing her food more thoroughly, which may help as well. It ALSO does double duty of IMMEDIATELY getting rid of the smell / keeps you from having to wash the toilet (or floors, etc.) every time this little girl throws up.

My daughter was unable to eat large meals when she was little. I think it was a combination of tiny tummy and very easy gag reflex. More small meals avoided the problem almost completely. I don't remember when she outgrew it, but I think she was pretty near kindergarten.

I think I'd ask the family to try smaller lunches. Assure them that you'll give her a healthy snack when she arrives, but you are having a hard time dealing with a major event every day. If that doesn't help, then it's probably emotional. I tend to agree with those who say there could be some unhealthy emotional patterns in this family.

Good luck with this one.

I'm not a caregiver, but my immediate thought was could she be vomiting as a result of being car sick? My son vomits if we go for drives more than a half an hour. I would suggest to the parents to carry a barf bag in the car.

To rule out the possibility it's physical/car sickness, could you ask the parents to stay the entire 45 min one time? Or even 1/2 hour. You say she throw up after the dad leaves. I'm assuming that's a couple of minutes after she leaves. So if he can stay maybe even 20 min or so next time, if she doesn't throw up until he leaves - it's got to be psychological, no?

When my granddaughter hit about a year old she threw up a lot. It was when she didn't get her way (started the terrible twos early lol) she would first cry then put her hands up by her mouth and eventually the hands landed in the mouth and she would gag herself and throw up. watch her closely and see if she is gagging herself on purpose.