Now, I know that many of you mama's subscribe to the "cry it out" when it comes time to teaching your baby how to sleep. I just can't seem to do it. I have tried it, but inevitably I end up picking my son up.
So, here goes...
I have a son who is just about 5 months old and from the very beginning he has never been a good sleeper. When he was first born, he didn't like taking naps and never slept much at night. Now, I have him taking about 3 naps during the day in his bed (the co sleeper) and at night (because I am nursing-no solids yet) I have now let him sleep in bed with me, so that I don't have to get up in the middle of the night. He still doesn't sleep well. After he nurses at night he does fall right asleep...thank goodness! But, in between his nursing, he startles him self and doesn't know how to soothe himself back to sleep, so I have to pat him or hold him to get him to sleep again. I have also tried putting a paci in his mouth, but i guess he knows the
"boob" is better tasting...cause he won't take it! On average he gets up every hour or so...so, I know he isn't hungry, but sometimes the easiest thing to do is to stick a boob in him...and he usually takes it and falls back asleep.
Needless to say, I am so tired from the months of no sleep. His Dr. said that I should continue to nurse him because he is a big baby and needs the calories (he is now 20 pounds and 28 inches). But, I am worried that because he nurses to sleep he is learning a bad habit.
I would love to hear from any mama's who have had a similar experience to find out how and when their baby started sleeping better. Or I would love to hear from a mama who has any advice other than the crying it out method that has worked for them.
Thanks for your advice ladies, I am so glad that we have one another!!!
It is not proven that giving them cereal helps them sleep but he might be satisfied longer. Also try giving him a pacifier to get back to sleep if you know he isn't hungry because the sucking motion is soothing to him. Have you tried swaddling him it might be comforting. I don't know if it works both of my kids HATED being swaddled. Good Luck
My son just turned 5 months and he is getting to be a better sleeper little by little. Just give it time.
I remember when he started sleeping 5 straight hours at 3 1/2 months I was shocked. He normally only slept 3. Now lucklily he is sleeping 6 hours straight and to my amazement slept 7 hours just the other night. I think this is something that can't be rushed and as your son grows sleeping patterns will improve.
By the way I failed to mention that the 6-7 hours he is sleeping he can only sleep in his swing. I also have the co sleeper but he hated it. Now when he wakes up I bring him to bed with me and do the same thing you do (use the boob as a pacifier). I know eventually I will have to change this but for now this is what works for us.
Everyone says to try the CIO method and put him in his crib but I am just not ready for this yet. I am just hoping that with time his sleeping patterns will improve
Hi,
Try reading the SLEEP LADY BOOK...absolutly life saving. I have used it on my 20 month old and currently my 9wk old. You will have a couple rough sleepless nights but after that sleeping for you and baby will improve. She also addresses and gives advise on feedings, medical problems related to sleeping and eating, and lovies like pacifiers and blankies that could help or hinder sleeping. :)
My son is 8 months old and he still does not sleep through the night. I can completly understand that it is so much eaiser to stick a boob in their mouth to simply get them back to sleep! When my son was younger, he slept with me as well and often did the same thing... not quite awake but 'fussy'. I kept a pacifier handy and gave that to him and that did the trick, he would go right back into a deeper sleep. I honestly don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing, but I know when I need sleep, sometimes I'm open to anything! Untill you find a more permanant solution, this might give you at least a few consecutive hours of sleep at one time :)
I know this isn't helpful now - but the best thing would have been to avoid allowing the baby to nurse to sleep from the beginning. My advice to friends is always - don't do it now if you don't want to be doing it a year from now. (Like a poster said below - if you are fine with the practice, more power to you. But if its a problem, that is what my response is based on.) Now that your baby is already used to nursing to sleep, it is probably almost impossible to get rid of all that nursing without some crying. That doesn't mean you have to "cry it out" though.
I would try reading "healthy sleep habits, happy child." It has four different methods, not just cry it out. You could try the elimination method. With that one you put the baby to sleep in their bed, and come back to soothe every 10, 15 minutes, etc. It will probably be a hard few weeks, but hopefully it will work.
On one other note, I don't think babies are ready to cry it out at 5 months old anyway. So I wouldn't go that route yet even if you were open to it.
Hopefully if he was in a crib without you, the pacifier might become more attractive to him. Lastly, I think that is really interesting that your DR said he needs the food since he is big. Mine have always said the other way around - with that much weight they should be able to sleep through the night no problem.
My little guys (twins) were bottle fed - but as an adoptive mother of twins (who tag teamed me with their nightly feedings) I definitely can sympathize with your sleep deprivation. I was wondering if your pediatrician has recommended starting your little guy on gerber foods or rice cereal? I seem to recall starting my guys at about four months with rice cereal and introducing gerber slowly at 4.5 or 5 months. This might help fill him up before he goes to sleep at night.
If he is still restless and startling himself I would recommend swaddling him pretty well for his arms only. If you can use a blanket and tuck one edge under his armpit on one side and then across his body (over the other arm), around his back and tucked in over the same arm you started with. With this type of swaddling you can minimize the startle reflex that is persisting for the little guy (I am a developmental pediatric physical therapist as well). I also used small pillows or blankets to prop my little guys on their sides in their crib (they slept together) but they were much more comfortable on their sides rather than on their backs. Hope this helps! Remember you this too shall pass!
It sounds like he isn't getting good sleep when he does nod off. Do you swaddle him? My little one used to startle herself in her sleep. I wound up swaddling her until she was almost 2. I swaddled her so tight that she could move if she really made an effort but she would just jerk from being startled. Also I know this isn't recomended but she slept on her tummy, it is the only way she'd sleep for more than an hour. If he is too big for traditional receiving blankets make one yourself using 1 1/2 yards of 45" wide flannel material.
My oldest was a big baby and I know they say bigger babies need to eat more but I still don't think that means they need to eat throughout the night. If he is nursing too often his metabolism will not be able to stabalize therefore he won't feel satisfied for very long. I would seriously cut down on nursing him at night to only once. If he wakes up more than that and wants to latch on don't let him. Just rock him. If he doesn't want the pacifier and you can calm him down without it then don't give it to him... you'll be able to avoid breaking the habit.
Habit? Yes. Bad habit? Depends on who you are talking to. I will try to be brief here. I have a 5 year old daughter and almost 3 yo son. Both were breastfed and both slept with me until 2ish (still do on occasion but both are happy to go to sleep in their rooms). Both of them woke up approx. every 1-2 hours to nurse up until they were night weaned around 2 years old. I can't say I was ever sleep deprived because I didn't have to get up, they were next to me already. Both have eased into their own beds very well. We started with a mattress on our floor and eventually moved them into their bed in their room. I knew that co sleeping and nursing on demand would most likely mean this is what my child would want until...? But this is what worked for our family and I'd do it the same again. I now have two very confident kids that have NEVER cryed themselves to sleep and enjoy going to bed. I guess I don't have a solution for you, I just wanted to let you know that I was there with both of mine and decided along the way that this would be such a short time in their lives - we survived and may be doing it all over again in the near future!
Enjoy your baby!
M.
At 5 months he should be on rice cereal. i think that will really help with his sleeping. You think he is full but maybe he isn't. He is uing your breast as a pacifier to soothe himself. Have you tried a pacifier? It might help. I never did the let them cry it out thing either. Broke my heart to hear them so upset. we sleep with our kids when they need us. no big deal. they will not want to do that forever. They all love to snuggle and we are all very close. Waht is wrong with that. As far as you getting some rest, you need to! I have 4 kids and about 7 months after my 4th was born and not sleeping at all i almost ended up in the hospital from exhaustion. I was having dizzy spells, severe headaches and other symptoms. Either ask a friend or family member to come over everyday for awhile in the afternoon so you can rest. That means turn off your phone get in your most comfortable pjs, draw the blinds and go to sleep. when your son sleeps during the day so do you. If you are exhausted you will not be able to take proper care of him. If you do not have anyone who can help hire a high school student and pay them a few dollars an hour to watch him. You will be home so if she needs you you are there. Pump milk so someone can give him a bottle too. Uninterupted sleep is a blessing. Sounds good huh? Hang in there. their sleep patterns change too so he will sleep eventually. You are doing it all right just take care of you too! if you need some support once in awhile just email me. ____@____.com
I will talk you through it!
debbie
