Need Help with My Picky Eater

I love this, as every mom has gone through it. I still struggle with my teenager, and my 3 yr old eats everything. Keep trying new things, just keep offering. I needed a larger solution as my son had stomach issues so I tried Juice Plus. Very yummy gummies and all whole foods. All the fruit and veggies he needs, and he will ask for them. www.mnsharesjuiceplus.com You will be so happy knowing all that good stuff is in there. My email is connected to the site I gave you so send a note if you need any more help.

Call Cynthis Epps at Mother Works. She is the best in LA. ###-###-#### or ###-###-####. Also, look at Jessica Seinfelds book. It is sooooooo great on integrationg foods for picky eaters.

I'm big on, this is what I've cooked, this is what we are eating. No, they don't have to eat it and yes, they have the option of skipping the meal or going to bed hungry (do not let the pleas of, "I'm soooo hungry" dissuade you). If they are truly not hungry, it's no big deal, I will save whatever it is for them for a later time. But, if it is a, "I don't like it" episode, they are free to skip it until the next meal - no snacks until then. When they have skipped meals, they are very eager to eat whatever it is I make for them the next time. When I introduce new foods (usually as side dishes), they must try one bite (no more, no less) and I bring the food back at least 4 times before it gets accepted. I also try and mix-in vegetables with known favorite foods (shredded carrots with spaghetti sauce, spinach with teriyaki noodles and beef, assorted small vegetables with macaroni and cheese or fried rice) and then serve a small portion of it. When a child has picked all the 'good-stuff' out and eaten it and asks for more, I reply with, "Certainly, as soon as you are finished eating what's already in your bowl". And while this may sound a bit mean or forceful, it's no like I'm asking them to eat a pound of green beans, I make sure it's a reasonable amount; often not enough to make a dietary difference, it's more about just getting them used to seeing and eating these things. Good luck to you!

Each child is different. AND then at each age, they go through food "phases." ALL THROUGHOUT childhood, they go through this. My friend's Teenage child is going through yet ANOTHER food phase of likes and dislikes.

For me, my daughter eats anything, since a baby and has a good hearty appetite... she will sit and eat in one sitting, then also graze on things. My son on the other hand, is SUPER picky... he will not just sit and eat all in one sitting. He is a STRICT "grazer." Meaning, he will pick and eat little by little throughout the day... but only when HE is hungry... not just because we say it's meal time.

What your son is going through it normal. Don't compare him to the other child. Find what makes your son tic, and then feed him accordingly. Just do not turn "mealtime" into a battle or "punishment" thing... otherwise, what should be a nice pleasant meal with the family... with just turn them off. And then they will associate "eating" with pressure and discomfort.

Don't worry, your son won't starve. But, ask your Pediatrician about other types of vitamins. My daughter loves the "Animal Parade" brand, liquid multi-vitamins. You can find it on Amazon or at your local natural food store. It is a 'whole food' vitamin all natural. My daughter LOVES this 'vitamin' and it's liquid, and it tastes good, and it's easy to give it to them. Some kids just don't like vitamin tablets or 'gummies.'

Your son is clamping his mouth shut, and kicking his legs and shaking his head... just to eat? It should not be this way. Use a different approach... don't pressure. It is NOT about "control" or making a child know who's 'boss.' This is food...so, it should be pleasant. Not a big ordeal.

How about encouraging your child to help you cook? To have an opinion about what HE likes? Pleasantly. Teach him to ask for things... nicely. Teach him that if he likes eggs... he does not have to eat it scrambled...maybe he likes deviled eggs or easy over? That is fine. My girl likes eggs... but not scrambled. She likes it easy-over... and she's at the age now where she can even cook it herself. With my supervision.

If you offer him foods... and he has his mouth-clamping and legs kicking reaction... then just stop. Then you all go about eating yourselves. Don't bring 'drama' into it... just be matter of fact. Then when you are all done with dinner, for example, just go about putting away, washing the dishes, put the food away etc. THEN, even if he is not eating....just continue with the routine. THEN, if he says "I didn't eat yet..." or, "how come your'e putting away..." or, "where's my food?" Just let him know that "I'm sorry...I didn't know what to feed you... and you didn't want to..." or, "Well, then can you HELP Mommy problem solve this? What should I do? You didn't want to eat?" Then... see what he says. You are then TEACHING him that there is a process to things... and are teaching him HOW TO PROBLEM SOLVE. BUT, respond to him with a pleasant voice... not one of irritation or sarcasm, or "I told you so..." kind of intonations.

He is 3.5 years old... so bringing in this kind of thought process and problem solving ability is a GOOD thing to introduce to him. And later, it will serve him well. Instead of just clamping his mouth shut/legs kicking... it MAY teach him to express himself and to say what is going on with himself...to "HELP" as a 'team' and then to trouble-shoot the situation... thereby, making him choose what to eat, and in a different type of atmosphere, that HE is a part of. Not just a time of 'rejecting' food and having food plopped in front of him.

Also, for my girl, although she eats well... she will not eat if there is TOO much or too many things on her plate. It overwhelms her. Especially if she is tired. We know what makes her tic. So, I put her food on a smaller plate, with just enough on it, and then, she is able to eat without feeling pressured that she has to eat "everything" on it.

MANY kids just eat carbs... and dislike veggies or meat. It's a phase. If my kids are going through that phase.. .I make smoothies, and then they "eat" and they don't know that there are TONS of 'healthy' things that I put into it. :)

Well, just some ideas and what I go through and do.

If you are really worried about him though, ask your Pediatrician.

Good luck,
Susan

I'm not a dietician, but I am a Mom of a 2.5 and former Preschool and 1st grade teacher...oh, and sibling to a former picky eater.

From my experience, it's totally normal...kids, toddlers and grown-ups have different tastes and they change over time constantly. My son used to loved veggies like squash, broccoli and green beans. Now, it's strictly corn, lima beans and carrots. If I dare put anything else on his plate, he'll tell me he isn't hungry. Our list of foods is short as well, but it is constantly changing. I have had to get super creative with the foods I give him, just to get him to try stuff...so I know the boat you're in.

One of the things I do is search different stores for appetizers that I can serve as parts of his meal...he loves pizza bagels, mini burritos, hot pockets, dinobites (dinosaur shapped chicken nuggets), meatballs, quiche, mini corn dogs, hot dogs...finger foods that has crunch and texture. If you have a list of things he WILL eat then don't despair, it will change as he begins to develop new curiousities about what's on other peoples plates.

For example, my sister used to be a picky eater...nothing could have sauce, nothing on her plate could touch or she'd refuse to eat and my favorite it couldn't be the color green. Now, she eats EVERYTHING in large quantities and you'd never think she EVER hated certain foods. Also, I don't know if your son is in preschool yet, but my little dude started going for a few hours, two days a week at his therapists urging and the other day he actually ate spagethii...he in the past has been anit-red sauce, but tried it because he saw his peers doing it.

In my experience with 3-4 year olds this is a very crucial age for independence and developing their sense of 'self'. He's just being a regular kiddo.

Kids are picky by nature...if you are concerned about his diet, then I would ask his Pedi if he can recommend a good nutrionist that can give you ways to introduce foods or create a diet plan. I've heard great things about the Seinfeld book, and ideas to introduce veggies.

One thing my son's doctor recommended was a multi-vitamin drop by Enfamil when he started solid foods. I put it in his milk or water or juice cup and he doesn't even know it's there. They have them all over the place CVS, Target or wherever...

Don't despair, he'll be fine and if the pediatrician doesn't think he has a weight issue or growth issue he's doing just great!

Good Luck and Have Fun!

D.

Hi J. - Get him on the Juice Plus gummies. My kids eat them by the handful and consider them a treat. They are the next best thing to eating f & V and will give you the peace of mind in knowing that he's getting the nutrients of 17 fruits, vegetables and grains every day. If you'd like to try them first, let me know and I'll send you samples. I just got back from a Juice Plus convention in LA and I'll tell you that every time I hear the health professionals and creators of Juice Plus talk about the integrity of this product, it makes me feel even more confident after 4 years of taking Juice Plus every day that we are more protected than the average person from disease. Our immune systems are better and during flu season we never get more than the sniffles since taking JP. Check it out at www.wethriveonjuiceplus.com. Feel free to contact me at ____@____.com or ###-###-####.

Hi J., I feel for you. As you're experiencing, food battles just are not fun. I know that Tim Allen's wife has written a book from her experience of "sneaking" healthy foods into other items. Does your older son have other developmental issues? If so, he might have sensory difficulties or have Autistic spectrum disorder. I have a feeling though that since that he's doing it for control. There are pediatric dieticians available, it depends where you live.

I just read the other posts, and many of them have common sense approaches that should work in your situation. I think that the post from the lady who had her daughter work with an OT was particularly helpful.

A lot of people have made good suggestions, but just keep trying. Don't make an issue out of eating, but don't cave and feed him junk. He should have regularly scheduled meal and snack times, so if he doesn't eat his meal, then he has to wait til snack time and be sure and make sure snacks are nutritious---no sugar applesauce and fruit cups, fresh fruit cut up into chunks, string cheese, diced chicken, tofu, yougurt. Will he eat those squeeze yogurts--Go-Gurts?Will he eat refried beans? What if you make it into a dip with whole wheat crackers like Triscuit or even some Wheat Thins? It can help to put his meal into a small muffin pan---a little something different into each little cup. Make sure you're not trying to get him to eat too much--preschoolers really don't eat all that much. Keep junk food out of the house so what he does eat is healthy. Make sure he's not filling up on milk or juices. A good book to refer to is "How to Get Your Child to Eat, But Not Too Much"---she has a lot of great advice for just what you're going through. Also, does he like gummies?? Juice Plus has gummies and that would help with his nutrition a great deal. I don't sell them, but here's a link where you can order them or contact for more info. Good luck!

https://www.juiceplus.com/nsa/pages/Home.soa?site=th37179

This is very normal. Keep offering him the foods. My daughter went through occupational therapy for feeding issues. We would celebrate small milestones with new foods. For example, we would start by just asking my daughter to touch the food. If she did that, we celebrated and had no more expectations. Later, we would encourage her to kiss the food. Again, celebrations if she did this. The next step would be to lick the food, followed by putting teeth marks in the food. It may have taken weeks, but eventually, she started accepting new foods. It was a positive approach to eating.

A schedule is also important in this process. Have a strict schedule, offer foods, and set a timer. If your child doesn't eat the food in the designated time, then take the food away and the child has to wait until the next meal period. About 5-10 minutes is enough to expect your 1yo to sit.

Check out the book by Ellen Satyr "How to get your kid to eat, but not too much." This is the book my daughter's OT, nutritionist, and psychologist uses as a formation to their program.

To make sure your child is still getting nutrition in this learning stage, there are many tricks to "hiding" veggies and other healthy foods your child will eat. For example, I love to fix a meat sauce over spaghetti squash (perfect for your son who doesn't eat meat or veggies). There are cookbooks geared toward this type of cooking as well and Mamasource mommies have a wealth of ideas that may work for you.

My daughter is still picky at 4 years old, but we've come a long ways since she was one years old and refused solids altogether.

First of all, if you don't have poor choices available your child will eventually get hungry and eat the good choices. Don't allow him to fill up on milk and juices instead of food. No french fries, etc. There is also a cookbook by Jessica Seinfeld which helps hide healthy food in attractive foods that children will like. If you buy children's vitamins that look like candy, your child will take them. Call it candy, if that's what he likes, he should eat it. It's all about NOT having junk available and only good choices.

J.,
I have a picky eater too, and I haven't been able to figure out what to do either. I know what you are going through and it is just so frustrating. Hope things get better for you and your son.

Yes, I have one out of three who sounds like yours. I have given her little bits of things that the others like, and sometimes she tries them and sometimes it ruins her appetite for what she will eat! It is very frustrating! I stopped making food a battle and I did start all of them on Juice Plus gummies. She will only eat the red ones that taste like candy, and the other kids eat both reds and greens. It is really fruits and veggies, unlike the other gummie vitamins. It feels like food insurance for right now. She has actuallt told me she feels better when she takes them and sometimes she even asks for fruit now!! That is hugh with her. The older she gets, the more she tries with friends, too. There just seems to be oral issues with her with some textures and consistencies. I also have her sit at the table with us even if she has had her snack or food before dinner. I feel that whold process is important, too.
Best of luck!
K.
www.karen4betterhealth.com
###-###-####

When my son was that age,I would steam vegetables and puree them and add them to whatever food I was cooking. As for fruitsn does he like Jamba JuiceV Maybe you can duplicate a smoothie with fruits at home. Let him be the one to blen the fruits in the blender and he might like to taste what he makes.Hope this helps.

Hi J.,
I know of 2 in Pasadena, I am not sure where you are. Here are their websites. http://www.centerfordevelopingkids.com/
and http://www.pasadenachilddevelopment.org/services/FeedingT...
I have a beautiful 2 year old daughter who has autism and has a very limited diet. we just started at PCDA with feeding therapy. I know how hard and frustrating it is. Hopefully with help, things will get better.
Good luck,
A.

Hi J., I have been impressed with the Southern Living At HOME cookbooks, mainly the Busy Moms one. The recipes are easy and were all tested on kids. My kids love them. Hope this helps. You can check them out at this website.
www.southernlivingathome.com/danacarey
www.scentsy.com/danacarey also a great website if you love candles, but are afraid to burn them with kids in the house.

I totally feel for you! This can be a tough age when kids want control and use food as one way to obtain it. There are tons of solutions of weelicious, but I alwasys suggest to parents to food shop with your kids, take them to farmers market and especially cook with them. If you make them a part of the experience, they tend to me more excited about trying the finished product.-www.weelicious.com

I too have a picky 3 1/2 year old. My pediatrician said to not make an issue about it, but to continue to give a small portion of the things he doesn't like. (Whatever we eat, he gets a serving on his plate). DO NOT force him, push him, or even ask him about it, but when he finally decides to try, then shower him with praise -even if he spits it out, whether he finishes or not. It takes somewhere between 10 to 20 exposures before they are willing to try something new.
Now,(after a year), my picky eater has started eating cooked carrots. We still have a long way to go, but one success is always a great one for me.

I have the same problem with my 4 year old. His diet mainly consists of Peanut Butter and pasta. To help supplement, we also give him Pedia Sure. Our pediatrician basically says let him eat what he will eat and eventually he will come around. They whole "hiding foods" thing doesn't work for us, as he will "pick" through his food if he finds anything unusual in it and complain about it. He absolutely refuses to try anything new. If we make a big deal out of it, he gets himself so worked up that he gags on the food. It just isn't a good situation. So, we just feed him what he will eat. If he does seem interested in something new, we will encourage him to try it. The Pedia Sure helps though. My 9 month old, on the other hand, will eat just about anything! We're hoping that his older brother may someday learn something from him! Good Luck! It's good to know that we are not in this alone!

Try mashing veggies up in his mac and cheese...or quesadilla's. It's one way I have found to sneak some nutrients in.

I didn't get a chance to read through all the responses, so I apologize if this is a repeat. I will add 1/4 to 1/3 packet of Carnation Instant Breakfast to my daughter's milk. Yes, it's a little added sugar, but it's also added vitamins and minerals. A little bit of nutritional insurance that is easy to incorporate into her daily routine.

Goodl luck, and know you have LOTS of company in the picky eater department!

a child will not starve themselfs willingly. my nephew was the same way. i watched him for 1 week for his mom and i made it known that i will not cook more then one meal at a time. what i cook is all i cook. i cooked pot roast and he wouldnt eat it. he sat here for an hour without eating so i told him that if he wasnt going to eat then he can get his jammies on and goto bed. so he did. then the next morning i gave him his dinner for breakfast and lunch and finally at dinner he caved and ate it. i told him that he did a great job eating and that he should always eat what hes given and i never had a problem since then. my 22 month old daughter gets picky evey so often with food. i will oly fight with her so long before imake her take her plate and throw her food away she hates it because she knows she wont be eating till her next meal. she has gone to bed several times without dinner. what i would try to do is put a couple bites of everything on your sons plate and tell him that he is not to leave the tabl till his dinner is gone and if he doesnt eat it then e will have it for his next meal. oh an fyi on the vitamins try a liquid (poly vi sol) i know that its for babies but ask his dr about how much you can give him. then just put it in his milk or juice in the morning (i do that with my daughter and she doesnt even know lol). good luck