Need Help for My Nieces....

K., I agree with Deanna L. You should get a little closer to the step-mom and/or have a family gathering to see how they all interact with each other. Then you'll be able to use better judgement on how to handle this. You don't want to go completely on the kids' point of view...you know they see things in a different light. You have to see for yourself.

It depends on what type of things they are telling you. If it is of an abusive nature, I would definitely report it to the proper authorities. Otherwise, there is not much you can do about it. If they threaten that you can never see the girls, and he has already taken them away from you once, then it is better for them to have you in their life than no one at all. It must be hard for them to have a step mom in their life and then one that may not be fair to them. Sometimes things get over exaggerated when kids have to experience step parents. My daughter has done this a few times and I usually ask her father about it, but it has been nothing extreme. So I would use your best judgement and follow your instinct. Deep down you know what to do. Also, it may be a good idea to get closer to the step mom and hear her side of the story. Keep your enemies closer. Get to know her and she may not be all bad as you think. She might need you to guide her in being a step parent. Make friends and go out and spend time together.

K.:

The most important thing is to make sure you have a continued relationship with your nieces which may mean biting your tongue and being a sounding board for them. If you say something to your brother then you are risking that you will not be able to see them and you will cause them trouble at home. It is best to assume the position of friend and listener. This they will remember for the rest of their lives. There simply may not be anything else you can do to help them. If you have a relationship with everyone then you are more likely to get the girls more often.

I have great relationships with my 2 nieces and 1 nephew. I am the one they call when they need help.

R.

What a horrible situation? Is your brother blind? If I were you talk to a lawyer seeing what the chances are of you getting the girls? Maybe some family therapy could help?

I would have the children tell someone else in the family or at school.

Here is my 2 cents, for what it is worth. I have been in a similar situation with my own sister and brother in Love((he wasn't always such!)), and she would go back and forth between my Husband and I being able to have the kids and not, because we were so involved in the welfare.

Now, I preface this by MY OWN PERSONAL situation. We called DFACS. Going to my sister, at THAT TIME, was to no avail. We knew the kids were in harms way, and we had to act. I never wanted my precious neice to look me in the eye and say...'You KNEW they were hurting me, and you LET THEM!'. So, we didn't. The result was removal from the home a couple of times, and in the end, well at least now anyway, the entire family has come to faith in Christ and is striving to live according to God's law and they are all doing much better.

If you can talk to your brother in a non threatening way, I advise that first, however, for me, that wouldn't have worked, because my sister was going to side with her Husband, reguardless, kwim?

Prayers are with you.

Heaven Bound,

A.
Mom2allofthem

Sounds like you may need another heart to heart with just your brother on the side!! Also, do you still have a mother or father alive that sees what's going on too? Maybe one of them could talk to him. "Not nice" doesn't really explain. Is she phiscially abusive or verbally. If it's really out of hand, you may need to call in the authorites like defax on them because you don't want them in an abusive household. What about the mom, is she in the picture. You have to make your brother understand that the childrens well being is first and formost!!