Need Good Advice on Bedtime

I think his bedtime is fine. His naps may be tripping him up. Although, I remember my daughter waking all through the night at that age. Also evaluate what you do when he wakes. Do you go to him or let him settle himself? I would get the sleep book by Ferber. I referred to that book for years. My daughter is now 7. She goes to bed between 8:30-9. The bedtime is not the issue. Hang in there and sweet dreams.

Our son is almost two and he still wakes up most nights. We co-slept until four months ago. He sleeps in his sister's bed now, but wakes up two to three hours after going to sleep. The easiest thing for us is to bring him into our bed for the rest of the night.
I remember when I was a kid and I woke up in the night wanting my mommy until I was at least five. So I think it is normal. As a parent, I think you just have to find a way to deal with it so it doesn't make you crazy. <g>

Hello J.,

I recommend a book called "Healthly Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. He talks about sleep for all ages of children and various techniques to help them sleep. My first thought is that your son is not going to bed early enough but your schedule may make an earlier bedtime difficult. This book was a godsend to us and I hope it helps you.

T.

I definately don't think he is going to bed too early. I think he is just in a pattern of night waking and needs to get out of that pattern. I don't know how you feel about letting him cry, but when this happened with our daughter we bought a nightlight at goodnitelite.com that glows blue moon at night and yellow sun when it is time to wake up. We then explained very clearly that we would tuck her in and not come back in until the sun light came on. She cried the first night for a while. We came to the door and reminded her that we couldn't come in until the sun light came on. Then we left her alone. The second night, a few more tears, but after that her night waking was over. Good luck!

We have a bedtime of 8 pm and it's 7:20 and my 2 YO isn't up yet.She didn't get a nap yesterday, though, so she will probably sleep a little longer.

Make sure that the evening meal is nutritious and enough food (and that he isn't hyped up on sugar/high fructose corn syrup or caffiene.)

I realize that it's difficult with day care and everything (I'm a stay at home mom) but I found that the children I worked with in day care (5 years) were sleep deprived. The poor kids could sleep for 3 hours if I let them.

They don't need a bath every day. In fact, unless they get dirty, mine get a bath twice a week (Sat and Wed.) The bedtime book during the week can be short and on bath nights you can sing a songs during bathtime (and there are some bathtime books too, ones that are plastic/waterproof.)

Also, if he's stressed at daycare, or has sensory problems (The Out of Sync Child is a great resource to determine this) he may have trouble sleeping. My children are on the autism spectrum and they sleep much better then children with sensory problems but they had sleep issues when they were younger.

Well rested children sleep better, over-tired children often have disturbed and interupted sleep patterns. Putting your child to sleep a little earlier, often allows them to sleep more soundly.

try baby wise it is a book my baby is 4 months old and she sleeps 10 hrs most nights is was hard at first but stick to it and it is wonderful and please remember if you do choose to do this the book is a guide line not a strict step by step i do the parts i feel important strictly and am lenient with others here it is at wal-mart but other stores have it too http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=5243... even sells it hope this helps

I could have written your question myself. My son is 2yrs & 3 mos and he still wakes up in the night. I have tried every sleep method that has been written and suggested on mamasource. I have finally come to terms with him waking at night. He can sleep through the night. He does on occasion and I count those as my little blessings.
I did speak to our pediatrician at his 2 year check up and he just told us that all kids are different. He did suggest shorter nap times, but like you my son goes to daycare and they like them to sleep during a certain period of time. I did try short naps over the weekend and it didn't help.
Sorry that I don't have any suggestions for you. I did want you to know that you are not alone. I had friends that their son did not sleep thru the night until he was 3. It always gave me comfort to know that someone else was going through the same thing. Good luck. If you find something that works, please let me know.

Hi J.,

Firstly his bedtime sounds about right fo rhis age. At 20 months he should be getting 10plus hours sleep at night and additional time for naps.

My son only started sleeping through the night when he was 2plus years old and by then i had tried evey method of sleep training in desperation and none of them worked for us...

Finally fo rhis 2nd birthday I decorate dhis bedroom in his favorite theme... Thomas the train.. He lovedhisnew comforter and decals and I used this as leverage.... he was not allowed to get up/cry during the nigh fo rno reason if he did he would lose his thomas stuff. Now if he needed to go toilet or had a genuine need then it was ok.

This has worked wonderfully, you just have to find what works fo ryour child, they are all quite unique and what works for your friends' & families children won't necessarily work fo r yours....

I hope this helps a little.

My 26 month old goes to bed between 730 and 8 wakes up around 730 and still takes a nap around 1-1 1/2 hours a day. The later we put him down the earlier he got up so that time works for us! He is probably used to you going in to get him back to sleep at night so try to find a way that works for you to sleep train him to sleep through night (cry it out, pick up/put down, stay with him and slowly leave room etc). Good luck!

Your schedule is similar to ours...we just have to leave the house a little earlier. Getting to bed early enough is always a challenge. I agree that many kids in daycare are sleep-deprived!

My daughter had a big time sleep regression right around two years old...she was teething again! I wasn't even thinking about her molars coming it and sure enough I could feel them poking through. It took months for her to cut them, and we had more bad nights than good, but she is back to sleeping well through the night AND taking a 2 hours nap nearly every day.

With my son I've noticed this.

The most important thing is consistency. His bed time is sometime around 8:00pm, the closest to that time I send him to sleep works out fine, even if it is a little before. The problems come when we pass the bed time (after 8:15) then it takes longer for him to go to sleep, there is more fights and is more common that he will wake up during the night.

Anything new you try to do will take at least a week to settle in. So take that in mind. You can try to, without talking taking your baby back to his bed, even if it is 25 times in one night. Usually that is only the first time, the following nights is less and less resistance.

It sounds that his routing is already the same every night, which helps. Any time that a kids is overtired or over stimulated his sleep patterns will be more and more difficult. Personally I think that 9:00pm for a two year old is way too late. As always is a matter of choices and what works for you.

I've been there and is so difficult! You are tired all the time because you don't get a full night sleep!

Good luck and Merry Christmas!

I also have a 20 month old - (April 2008 Birthdate). She goes to bed between 6-6:30 and wakes up between 6-7 AM, she also has a daily nap 1.5-2 hours each day. Babies this age need 13-14 hours of sleep a day/night, so your little guy could sleep 12 hours at night. I am sure that it is rough with daycare and you working but I agree with one of the other suggestions about not having a bath every night.

I believe that your friends who are saying he goes to bed too early may have older kids who don't need as much sleep.

He is capable (at this age) of sleeping through the night, it seems that he is just used to waking up and having some "mom time" during the night. Part of his routine is to wake up, so you need to rewire him so that waking up doesn't get him a reward (playing, rocking from Mom, getting to sleep the rest of the night in your bed, etc). I know that it sounds counter-intuative but the LATER we put our little one to bed then the more restless she sleeps and wakes up and the earlier she gets up.

You can start by adjusting his sleep time by 15 minutes earlier each week and see how that works.

Good luck.
blessings,
Stacy