Need Dog Advice

Updated on January 28, 2008
L.P. asks from Tampa, FL
16 answers

My husband and I have three dogs. Two Rots and a Maltese. The Rots are ages 5 and 10 and the Maltese will be 13 in July. Our daughter is 2 and the she gets along great with the Rots. We always keep them apart unless we are in the same room. The Maltese was my dog before we got married. I hate to admit it but he drives me crazy. He is a barker and will bark at everything. If the bigger dogs make a sudden movement in the house he barks, if my husband comes to the door he barks, he barks to go out at 4am, he barks if I run to the phone. He won't leave my daughter alone. She can't sit on the floor and eat anything because he is right there. He sits at the bottom of her high chair. We can't put him outside or in a different room because he will bark. This is why he drives me crazy. Recently he somewhat snipped at my daughter, more of a growl.
Has anyone else felt this way about their pet later in life. I hate that I feel this way, but just don't know what to do. I hate that my Maltese has become second to my child, but I knew this might happen. Any suggestions? Anything?

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J.J.

answers from Gainesville on

L.,

We have pets too and 9 mos. old twins and have had some "transition issues". We found it very helpful to seek the help of a local trainer in High Springs. It is J & K Canine Academy and they are wonderful! Hope that you are able to find a solution that is safe and works for everyone involved...

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A.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

I've worked professionally with dogs (and cats) for over 14 years. I agree that training is in order. Find someone who is familiar with Koehler Method of dog training. You will need to change the malteses's idea of where he fits into the "pack". It will need to be a whole lifestyle change and thinking differently. For example, he will be the last to eat, he cannot get up on the furniture (without permission, if you cannot break him of this all together), he is the last to go out the door, and generally he will have to obey a command before getting any attention/food/his way. You will likely need to "pin" him on the ground to reinforce your leading role and especially when he is around the toddler. Always praise good behavior and never let any pet alone with a child. The barking is probably a sign of pent up anxiety that many little dogs have. Since he has done this for a while, it is now just a habit and he probably gets lots of attention by barking (either bad or good). Give him a good outlet for that anxiety, like a really good long walk. He may be getting older but still requires plently of exercise and fresh air. I trained my husbands' college dog her basic commands at 11 years of age and we still practice them 6 years later. Good Luck.

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T.R.

answers from Orlando on

Hi L.,

I also have a rot and she is wonderful with our 3 yr old. She has always been protective and plays great with him even tho she is old and has bad legs. However, we have trouble with our smaller dog. She steals his food as soon as I am not looking and she gets snippy with him. Luckily we kennel train our dogs young so if we ever need them to go to the kennel we are used to it. If you can not kennel your dog or lock him in another room you may have to teach your daughter to leave him alone so he does not nip. Unfortunately it is hard to teach a 2 yr old the consequences of her actions. And I know how stubborn an older dog can be, especially a very spoiled little one!! :) It was hard but after our son was born I had to let my dogs know they were no longer the queens of the household. Although they were always my babies and like my children things had to change, my baby boy was just more important. It took a while but they learned who was boss. I wish you luck, as they say you can't teach an old dog new tricks. Well maybe you can but it sure is hard!!

T.

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M.G.

answers from Naples on

It is perfectly normal and natural for you now to place your child first and your Maltese second, so don't "hate it." The key to your actions concerning the Maltese is right here: your child comes first. If the dog bothers the child and--this gives me shivers--"somewhat nips" at the toddler, you need to take action immediately to keep them apart. So what if the dog barks when put in another room. Get used to it. Which would you rather have, a barking dog or an injured child? Have you ever trained this dog? Can you use rewards to train him not to bark? Yes, old dogs CAN learn new tricks. Give it a try. But definitely keep the dog from injuring your child!

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T.G.

answers from Tampa on

Oh, I am suffering from similar issues. I have 2 Brittanys. They were my life before I had my 2 kids. I have a 2 year old (in 2 days) and a 4 month old. Before I got pregnant I even let the dogs sleep on the bed with us. Iknew it would be a problem so once I gotprego, they weren't allowed on the bed. Then once my son came, they basically live outside now. We let them in at night and send them to our bedroom. When they do come out, they eat their toys. I feel bad because I know they feel abandond. I never go out and play with them. My husband feeds them but I really have changed since the baby was born.
I wanted my kids to grow up with dogs so they can learn compassion. My older boy dog has growled and almost snipped at my son. I told my husband "one more time and he's gone". I don't know if I can stick to my guns though. I am the type of person that says, "you get a pet, you make a commitment for 15 years". How can I retract my beliefs?
Good luck to you, I don't know what I'll end up doing, if anything. I just hope the kids get old enough to play with them. As far as the table thing. We let our dogs inside after he eats. They make great vacummes! =)

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T.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

I would recommend some GOOD dog obedience training, such as Cesar Milan's website they may have connections to a local obedience school for canine's.
I have two children and at one point had 14 dogs...your dog like it or not used to be the ALPHA in your pack, and now you are trying to show that you are the ALPHA and your child is the ALPHA, and honestly it's probably making your maltese confused. If the dog is snippish at the baby then DEFINATELY get a muzzle and do what ever you can to seperate them, as for barking outside, I do believe there is a collar you can get that will give a small shock when he barks, he'll eventually learn to stop barking. Remember you are the ALPHA in your pack...be stearn, and calm when disciplining the dog, kind of like disciplining a child. AND KEEP UP WITH IT...don't stop because you get good results for a month...you have to constantly reinforce the rules. I have a pitbull and while she is loving, she knows that when i say "get in the cage" she better git or she's gonna be in trouble. If you want some more tips that I've learned from experience just message me privately and I'll try to help as much as I can. Good luck.

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K.J.

answers from Tampa on

Do you ever watch the Dog Whisperer? Ceasar Milan? HE IS GOOD! You should watch it... It will give you ideas. He wrote a book too.

My mom has a pit terrier and had issues with her too, but she got a trainer that came into the house and helped. She is a different dog.

Hope this helps a little.
Peace and Blessings,
K. J.

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S.B.

answers from Lakeland on

I had the same thing happen to me. I have three children under 3 and have VERY little tolerance for nippy animals. Small dogs seem to be the worst culprits. You should NEVER, EVER feel bad about putting your child before your dog. Wow! It just sounds silly writing that!!! See if a family member would adopt your pet...that's what I would do.

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H.D.

answers from Tampa on

The reality is that when you have kids, the dogs must come second. Even when the dogs were your "baby's" first. I work with dogs for a living, and I've gone through this with my own. Barking is a behavior, that at this stage in the game, could be corrected with advice from a trainer, but at the age your dog is, it may not work. The nippy behavior is not uncommon for the breed, let alone a dog of that age. They become more sensitive physically and less inclined to change their habbits. Some of the things I do with my dogs- they do not get acknowledged when I come in the house until i give Reaghan a hug, helps reaffirm her position of theirs, if your worried behavior may escalate into biting your child, you must keep the dog in a seperate room during those times shes on the floor etc. Perhaps trying a citronella bark collar or something similar cold help. These are just a few suggestions and I know barking can make a sane person go crazy, but some tough love may just help out. Good luck

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B.R.

answers from Orlando on

I am in the same sort of situation. I have 2 big dogs and just got rid of my cat. I have been insane (not really) due to the animals and having a child. The dogs want attention all the time too. And I too have to keep the dogs separated with a gate on the other side of the house most of the time. And they do not like this, especially the beagle. He whines and barks more than the other. And my 2.4 year old son would chase the cat around. So I finally made the decision to give him another home to the parents of the guy I dated when I got him. So I didn't feel so bad. But I'm still trying to find a home for the beagle through the organization I got him from. BUT, if your dog has shown aggressive behavior towards your child and won't them him/her alone, I would seriously consider finding the dog a new home. My beagle refuses to accept my child and he has to be out of the room all the time or he could snip. He growls at my child all the time. So there is no room to let him get close to my son. Just my thoughts. Good luck. Oh how it would be so nice to be animal free. It has put a lot of stress on me for sure being a SAHM. Good luck!

Also, I just read someone elses ides of a bark collar. We got them for our dogs. It works for the 80 pound dog, but not necessarily for the 50 pound beagle. He still barks, but not as loud. You'd just have to try it out on the dog and see how it responds. There are different kinds of bark collars and varying degrees of sensitivities.

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T.P.

answers from Tampa on

Hi L.. That maternal instinct overrides everything else I think, love for pets and husband (if you ask me!!). I have 2 muts, one is over 10 years old and very maternal but also older and losing her hearing and getting slower. I worry that she can't take the hassle a 3 year old will inflict on her! The other is a chow mix and very skittish and she has snapped at my son, not viciously but a reaction to a scare. I keep them apart as much as possible, they get supervised visitation:) As my son ages and gets more experience with them I will increase the visitation times. Unfortunately my dogs went from being my children to being dogs!! They are outside alot and don't get near the spoiling they used to! But, my son comes first. If I were worried I would put the dog up for adoption to a home that can spoil him. It's not abandonment if he's in a better plcae for him.
Hope it all work out.

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L.S.

answers from Tampa on

When it comes to barking I had to get over that. I have 2 dachshunds and a poodle that never shut up :-) I've had to find other homes for 2 pets because of their actions towards my kids. When my daughter was 2 she plopped down next to one of our basset hounds. He grabbed her ear and drew blood. Come to find out he had a bad inner ear infection that we couldn't tell her had. I couldn't take any chances and found a basset hound rescue group who took him. They figured he was getting older and needed to be around teens or older.

I had a dachshund who basically stayed in my lap. She was wonderful with my daughter and would run around with her playing. If she stopped she was in my lap. When I had my son she became jealous of him. SHe tried to squeeze between us when I was breastfeeding. Then one day I heard a growl from her. At that time there was a story in the paper of a lap dog killing a baby. I just couldn't take any chances.

Before I had my son I was doing foster care for a rescue group (where I got the dachshund). A lot of rescue groups will let you list your dog with them for a fee. It helps them raise money. You keep the dog in your home and people will email you that are interested. The rescue group will also do a background check so you know your dog is going to a good home. It's also nice because with both of my dogs I got to keep in touch with the new owners and both dogs went on to very happy homes where they were spoiled rotten. That makes it much easier.

There are some dogs that just don't deal well with children. The dogs we have now were all puppies when we got them and have been around children all their lives. The other two it was harder for them to adjust to. I know the food issue is a pain too.

Good luck with your decision. I know it's a hard one. You can find local rescue groups at petfinder.org.

L.

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A.H.

answers from Tampa on

Hey L.,
I've been where you have been and our furry kids can scare us for sure! Heres a few suggestions that might sound harsh, but will help you. First is to try a crate, if your house is too small, then maybe getting some babygates and putting the puppy in your room or kitchen. The other option is getting her a muzzle so she can't bark, but is still able to drink for time spent outside. These are the only two things I can suggest at this time. I hope that you can find a way to make it work with your furry baby and your daughter.

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M.H.

answers from Orlando on

first off you can teach a dog new tricks so try training him to stop the behavior you do not like. i read the "the loved dog" which has a whole chapter on barking. i had dog for 12 year and yes then get annoying, don't feel bad but try training him to mak efor it.

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T.C.

answers from Tampa on

We had a 9 year-old rescued Greyhound and a 19 year-old cat when our baby was born. Our son is now 18 months and we just have the cat (who lives outside). We never thought we would get rid of our dog. He never did anything bad to our baby, but I just could not even take the smallest of risk. Our dog did try to bite someone once and because of that we gave him away when our son was 3 months old. It was the best decision. As for our cat, she is so old that she is incontinent and does not clean herself...so she has to live out on our screened in porch. Sometimes I miss the cat she used to be, but now my life is different and there is nothing more important than my son. Life is definately less stressful and cleaner with no animals in the house!

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S.K.

answers from New York on

Sounds like a no-bark collar is in order. Firstly, if you question your child's safety with the dog, you may have to re-consider wether or not the dog is a safe family member. Secondly, while I am not a proprieter or animal cruelty, if you dog in the wild (or any canine for that matter) was to behave in a fashion that upset the pack leader, he/she would be dealt with in a physical manner, oftentimes bitten or nipped. A no-bark collar appropriate for his size and weight should help curb the barking problem, allowing you to seperate him/her when needed. Bear in mind, many small dogs are highly protective and excitable, and opentimes they show this is in odd manners. As for the dog begging food from your child and being in her face, "begging" is my least favorite of dog's habits, I have a 55lb boxer mix who is the KING of begging. I use a "no begging" command followed by a swift swat and removal to another area (if he ignores the verbal command). He had barking issues in the past, and I found that a combination of bark collar and isolation helped calm his barking. Try putting your malt in a kennel (correct for his size) and cover it with a blanket. not being able to see out should make him less anxious, and if you place him in a quiet area while you eat (with bark collar until he calms down) you should be able to eat without droolng doggie at your feet.

Good luck!

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