My Son Who Is 7 BIPOLAR Became VERY DEPRESSED...................................

It sounds like he's having an anxiety attack. I have had bouts with my own manic depression and anxiety is a major driving factor in some of his behaviors. He doesn't need to be panicking to be in an anxiety attack or he could be, but it's very important to find what brings him down. Running water works for some people I know, and for me 'Hazel and Grettel". I have someone read it to me, and I know it sounds weird, but it works. Meds are fine and dandy, and in some cases neccesary, but I would focus on his anxiety and I bet you see a difference!!!

I feel for you and your son. Years ago, I worked with mentally ill children and then adults. I have worked with many with Bipolar disorder and know that it can be a very scary disease, for both the person who suffers from the disease and for those that love and care about them. There are organizations for parents with mentally ill children. If I remember right it is SAMI (S=? A=alliance M=mentally I=ill). Maybe the S is Spokane, since that is where I live, but if you are elsewhere, I am sure that they have similar organizations. It would be very helpful for you to have other parents to reach out to that know exactly what you are going through and have a support network locally. I know that one thing that really helped with the folks that I have worked with is to keep them busy. Find something that he enjoys and support him with it. If he likes to put together puzzles (a nice, quiet activity that allows him to focus on something tangible), then make sure that he always has a supply of puzzles on hand. If the weather is nice, take a nice long walk through the neighborhood or the park. Excersize and the fresh air can be good for clearing his mind and helping him to get some stuff out of his system. If you are able, do this one on one and allow him to talk about what is bothering him and let him vent. He may not be able to fully express what is going on in his head, but giving him the opportunity to let it out will be beneficial to him. I agree with the other moms about getting him to see a counselor on a regular basis, not just when he is in crisis. Having regular sessions will help teach him coping skills and help him not to have a build up of anxiety or depression, or whatever it is that is bothering him. Good luck to you in this journey, because it is a lifelong journey. It is good that you figured out early on what the problem is, that is half of the battle.
A.

Hi M.,
My name is S. and I am a mother of a 9 year old daughter. I am bi-polar and my daughter is on medication for depression and anxiety they are also keeping a close eye on her for bi-polar disorder.

I wish I could have been diagnosed when I was as young as your son but they didn't not diagnose children with very many mental disorders back then. So I didn't get diagnosed until I was 19 and after a few misdiagnosis and a few suicide attempts they finally gave me the correct diagnosis of bi-polar and got me on the correct meds and I have been in some form of therapy ever since.

So you have to find something soothing or something that works for your son when he has a melt down. Because even when his meds are right and his therapy is going good he will still always have some symptoms and melt downs they just won't be as severe as they would be without. I sometimes take a shower, or if it's really bad I submerdge my face into a bowel of ice water to shock myself, I also can get calmed down if I lay down on the couch with some tea and a chick flick, sometimes my daughter helpes me and she rubs my head.
Just talk to your son when he's not upset, have a brainstorming session. Make it fun when you talk to him about it and come up with a few ideas together so that they will be there the next time. Make sure they are quiet and relaxing activities ie. movie, you reading a special book to him something that doesn't require much focus on his part because that could frustrate him even further.

Do you have your son in therapy regularly? If so that's great! If not you need to get him in therapy now! I have been in therapy since my diagnosis. There have been times when I have only had to go once a month, but I've been going through a hard time so I've been going every week.
I see that you live in Milton so I would suggest going through Mary Bridge Childrens Hospital I'm sure that they have a good mental health program there.
I know there is a place in Lakewood called Greater Lakes Mental Health you might want to look into that. I know they do really good work and I know they have a childrens clinic.

I use to live in Tacoma but now I live in Seattle and I take my daughter to Odessa Brown Childrens Clinic which is a part of Childrens Hospital if nothing in Tacoma works out and you're willing to make the drive try them.
It is so important that he is always in therapy because they will teach him skills on how to process his bad thoughts, teach him how to be mindfull and not impulsive. Basically they can help him with life skills that bi-polar people lack and they can also help him come to terms with and understand his diagnosis. Coming to terms with a bi-polar diagnosis is an on going process. I still struggle with it because it can be a hard disorder to understand and it can also be shamefull especially with the media attention that the disorder get's these days and the false information that's out there. Then you feel like your friends that know that you have if might have seen that on TV and think that you're really crazy.

Have you told him about his diagnosis yet? I totally understany if you haven't it's a big confusing thing to explain to a child. You don't have to tell him until your ready. How is your ex-husband taking the diagnosis? Is he supportive of him getting his meds and everything? If your wondering how to explain to him why he is going to see a therapist, the way I explained it to my daughter was I told her that I noticed that she was sad and that there are special doctors for people who need to talk and they're called talking doctors and I see a talking doctor and that you can tell a talking doctor anything and they won't tell anyone, or laugh at you, or make fun of you. She took it really well and she loves going to her talking doctor.
Also make sure he gets every dose of his meds because it takes 5 days to get back on track if you miss a dose.
I also want to warn you for the future that bi-polar people are known for going off their medications. They think that they are "okay" then they go off their meds without telling anyone. I've been guilty of it many times I'm typing this now and I know its wrong and crazy but I know someday in the future I will be in the frame of mind where I think I'm "Okay" and I will go off my meds.

I feel for your son because he is in for a long haul hopefully he will be able to get an understanding of his condition at a young age.
The most important person in my life as far as my disorder is conserned is my mother. No matter how bad things got with me, if I yelled at her, swore at her called her names, I think I hit her once, she was and is always still here for me and I don't think I would have made it through life without her. I have lost friends because of this disorder but my mom was and will always be here.
So I guess my best piece of advice to you is to always, always, no matter what he says or does to you while he is going off or manic always be there for your son. He needs you now and he always will. He's special and he needs your extra love.

Please email me if you have any questions
____@____.com
Good Luck
S.

***hugs*** I can only imagine what you must be going through! First decide what you want to do. You need to decide how bad it is. There are crisis hotlines, his counselor/doctor should have an emergency number you can use. If you don't feel it's that bad then as a precaution I would remove anything sharp from his bedroom and make all medications unaccessable. I think what he really wants though is for you to tell him how important he is to you, and how much you would miss him if he were gone. Or maybe even just hold him, if he'll let you. Just hold him close. I believe that depressed people who talk about suicide are either reaching out for help, flirting with the idea or just looking for attention. Whatever the reason it should always be taken seriously. I struggled with depression throughout my childhood as well. I started having those feelings I think starting out in 5th grade and it escaladed through highschool and after. I am well now and thank goodness!! I would not wish those feelings on anyone! If you ever need to talk I am here for you! I would be more than willing to share my experiences of childhood depression with you if you think it may help you.

My sugestion would be to really focus on spending a lot of extra special time with just u and him. Go to a movie or even a walk on the beach. I'm not a fan of medication so i try to do other things to calm things. Hope things work for you!

M.,

I really sympathize with you! My dad, mom, and two out of three brothers are also bipolar. I know what it is like to go through the ups and downs! It was hard growing up and not understanding the disease. As soon as I could I started educating my self on the disease and how I could help. My dad committed suicide when I was 8 years old. When he died there was a lot that was unknown about the disease. There weren't as many medications or treatment options available as there are now. I am thankful that there are many medications and therapists available to offer treatment and some relief!
Living and caring for someone who is bipolar is difficult! I commend you for trying to be there and do the right thing for your son!
Is he seeing a Mental Health Specialist? One thing that I learned is that biological brings on psychological. One of the therapists that my mom used to see had her keep a daily chart. The chart her her rate her mood on a 1-10 (1 being totally depressed and 10 being not at all depressed) scale on how manic she was and a 1-10 scale on how depressed she was. It also asked her to list any good or bad events that happened in a particular day. This helped her and her therapist recognize what type of events that could be causing her more anxiety which would lead her to being more depressed or that were making her more manic.
There is a book called the Depression Work Book that has been a lot of help to me! It is a book that you and your son can work through together. It would help him and you understand a little more about what is going on with him.
I'm glad you have found a medication that seems to be working for him, that is important for him and you!

Good luck, and best wishes!

L.

Hello M.,
I read you thing and wonted to cry. You see I was where you were not to long ago. And with special childeren like that it takes more out of a mother then anyone could ever understand. I speek from experance. I three wonderfull childeren. They are 9,7,5. All three are ADHD and my oldest is my son he is ADHD and ODD. With instances like that there isnt much you can do but weight. When my son goes throw that I weight for him to wont to talk to me about whats going on. evey child is unique in how they act but time is what most of them need and understanding. If he isnt talking to someone I would get him in to talking to someone. My son has been seeing someone for two almost three years now. They also have a place called first call for help.. Its a way of getting resurance and someone to talk to. It wont cost you anything but give a little direction. I wish there was more I could say but would love to talk again if you would like. Good luck with everthing!

Check out this website:

www.truehope.com

It isn't a quick solution, although the results can sometimes be seen very quickly. This is a nutritional supplement approved by the Canadian equivalent of the FDA to treat Bi-Polar. It has made a tremendous difference for a few of my own family members (including my sister and son both diagnosed with Bi-Polar) and has helped them remain prescription-free. It is going through a couple double-blind studies (including one at Harvard) to get approval in the US as a legitimate form of treatment for this disorder (then the insurance companies would cover it). It has none of the terrible side effects that the prescriptions have and my son (13yrs) says, "It helps me to be able to know what I'm thinking instead of everything swirling around so fast that it gives me a headache."

~T.~
www.silaskyne.blogspot.com