My Son Only Takes My Pinkie for a Pacifier and Ive Tried Everything.

Updated on February 20, 2012
M.H. asks from Palestine, TX
13 answers

My 10 month old son will only take my pinkie for his paci...I cant go anywhere or leave him with anyone. I have bought every pacifier known to man and he spits them out and or chews on them....he use to take a pacifier up until he was 3 months old and one day he latched on to my finger and ever since then...thats all he will take. I dont want to break his heart..I am a stay at home mom but I dont want to let him cry knowing thats what he wants. When I do get the strength to not give it to him he will grab my hand and pull it to his mouth..even in the middle of the night. If anyone has a solution please help me.....

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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

Sorry- I know it'll be hard to take that away from him, but for his health I would.... so many germs on hands! Last thing you want is him catching an illness from something you've touched unknowingly. Have you tried to get him attached to a blankie or stuffed animal? If you do decide to do that I really recommend the blankie route... my 2 year old still adores blankie and it's far easier than a stuffed animal to clean- just toss in the washer and dryer! Best of luck to you. It broke my heart to take her pacifier from her (but wanted to save her teeth)and I know this must feel the same way to you.

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

Poor little guy... that is what he is used to. Mine only likes the green pacifiers that she got at the hospital. The do get attached to a certain way of soothing. The only solution that I have is to start at nap time either with a pacifier or not with a pacifier. And try to soothe him some other way - maybe keep putting the pacifier in his mouth while patting his little bottom. Do that at nap for a few days then see how that goes. Then you can graduate to night time. He will adapt; however, it may take some patience and hearing your little one cry. If feel for you b/c I can't imagine how hard it will be to break this b/c the thing he is used to is attached to you. Good luck! Hopefully, you will get some more advice.

Also, I read some other comments about the pacifier. I was scared of the pacifier as well with my first. Eventually, I gave in. I got some good advice once: You can always get rid of the pacifier; however, it is harder to break thumb sucking b/c it is always with them. At this age they still like to suck so if you stop the pinky and don't use a pacifier. Don't be surprised if he finds his fingers. This isn't a bad thing; however, it may be harder to break later on when he is older. The breaking of the pacifier was so easy - my little girl stopped using it at 18 months with no crying and no drama. I just didn't want you to be fearful of transition to the pacifier if that was your choice.

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Wow, what a tough situation to be in! I really dislike the cry it out method, but in this case you may not have much choice. I liked the idea about putting a bandage on your finger for a while, so he can't suck it.

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C.E.

answers from Dallas on

You might pretend to get a boo-boo on your pinkie and wear a splint on it for a while. That may help him get over it.

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J.J.

answers from Dallas on

He will find a way to self-soothe - perhaps his own fingers... My youngest wouldn't take a bottle or paci of any kind - she had tongue tie issues... my oldest had a paci and my middle sucked his thumb. He doesn't need to suck your pinkie - if he wants to suck more he would take the paci or his own fingers!

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A.A.

answers from Dallas on

You just have to stop. he will get over it really quick. Do not offer him a pacifier as it will be hell breaking the habit later. Just be strong and let him cry.

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I know it's tough and breaks your heart, but you can't have a life if your baby is constantly sucking on your pinkie. I think you should do "tough love" no matter how hard it is. Hopefully a bottle will calm him down. Another reason to keep your pinkie out of his mouch is germs. If you choose to continue giving him your pinkie, make sure you wash your hands! We don't want your pinkie sucker to get sick! Good luck.

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H.B.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, you just have to stop! He will only cry for a few days and then you will be over this! Be strong! You can do it! Just tell him no, offer him a snack or a sippy cup, try to distract him with a toy or a game or a change in scenery, something new and different, but do not give in.

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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with the other two moms. He is old enough to just let him cry it out. You could continue to try offering him a pacifier and maybe he'll be desperate enough to take it after a day of no pinkie... or he'll find his own fingers. Good luck.

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C.L.

answers from Wilmington on

Thank you so much for sharing Newmomie, we also have a pinkie sucker (although he is non-discriminating and anyone's pinkie will do). We have run into a few pinkie sucker babies (in the airport for instance a couple were laughing at us and reminiscing about their pinkie suckers). I think many babies move out of the finger sucking stage on their own (their own fingers or others'), but right now my baby has just had his top two teeth come in (and he has 4 others), so I think it is time to break the habit, we will try distraction and a comfort blankie to chew on (and yes you are correct some babies just won't take a paci no matter what you do and maybe this is for the best in the long run as paci habits can be really hard to break too). Do let us know how you get on with this. All the best.

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M.T.

answers from Dallas on

what I noticed with both of my boys, when they spit out the pacifier at the three month mark...that's when I broke them of it. I didn't have the hassle of trying to "break" them of the binky.

As for the bottle, same thing as soon as they could crawl or walk and something else interested them, that's when I took it away. I can't help you with the pinky, other than stop letting your child suck on it, yeah, it'll be hard for a few days, maybe a week, but would you want to be walking around with your 11 month old or 12 month old with your finger in his mouth? I think not. I think in some way, you're attached to it too. I remember having my child do things that I thought were "cute" at first, then they became habits, then I realized that it wasn't such a good habit, and then when they stopped I felt sad or empty, like "the cute thing we used to do together is gone". Always remember its a memory that you'll always have, but time to move past it.

And as soon as the little man starts walking (about age one) slowly reduce the use of the bottle (if you're not nursing) and introduce sippy cups and spoon food. Best thing I ever did! I remember my little brother was 4 when my mom finally broke him of the bottle and pacifier. UGH!

Be strong! A mother is still be loving and affectionate regardless if you have your finger in your child's mouth or not.

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

Victoria is right. You will just need to let him cry. He's ten months old, nothing detrimental will happen if you let him cry for a few days to move away from your pinkie. You will know he is not in pain, hungry or sick - it will be okay.

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V.T.

answers from Dallas on

If you are really ready to take it away, you have to just do it and then deal with the crying. It will take a couple of days of hell, but after a few days he should move on. It's going to be awful and it's going to break your heart to hear him, but I don't know of any other way. When he starts to cry for your pinky, try distracting him with another toy or activity.

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