My Son Needs Advice

Well, I have a 6 yr. old girl who will not eat meat. If we go out to eat she will order chicken nuggets if she eats them fine, if not I do not force her. However she like to eat veggies. By the way my child has never liked meat, but I still offer it to her.

I would have to say that a 4 year old is NOT old enough to make that choice. It needs to be explained to her that animals are NOT people...and it is healthy to eat meat! AND it doesn't have to be pointed out to her that all the things she eats contain meat...my boys are 6 and 8 and they still are confused about what meat is and isn't. At 4 years old she doesn't have to know everything because her reasoning part of the brain has not even STARTED to really develope...so explaining in detail is almost a total waste of time. This is why countries like Germany do not allow children under the age of 5 to watch ANY TV...their minds are not developed enough to tell reality from a cartoon...and in the cartoons animals are always talking and doing human-like things!

I know my grandson was grossed out when he was told about the same age that hamburgers came from a cow. You could see his face just cringe and he really didn't want to believe it because he really loves animals. I guess he likes meat more though because he continued to eat it.

Not to make light of the subject but I would've said that's where hamburgers & hot dogs come from. She'd then realize that meat isn't so bad but yes, I agree if she doesn't want to eat meat she shouldn't be forced but she should at least know that's what's in her burgers, etc. if she does eat them. She can then know in her mind that processing meat is a bit different than when it's ready to eat that she has, indeed, eaten meat & that it's good for you in some instances. When I was her age, the family & friends always went hunting & we always watched them "process" the deer which I found a bit boring but nonetheless fascinating. Each kid reacts differently but if now the thought of how meat is processed obviousy grossed her out beyond wanting to ever eat meat again (if applicable) then yes, it should be her choice. Best of luck.

Seriously I would not address it again. It is frightening for children (and some adults) to get into the hows and whys of meat processing and she is just too little to have it make sense and not be kind of frightening. Her reaction was normal...she doesn't want to believe she caused Bambi or any other animal to be hurt. She may not connect chicken nuggets to what she saw on TV and he certainly doesn't have to discuss how they are related. Just serve her food as normal and don't make a big deal about it. For the record, I am not saying to hide things or not to educate your children, I am simply saying there are age appropriate lessons and this isn't necessarily one of them. Good luck to you all.

I laughed at this story, my daughter was with me when we lived over sea's and went to a cook-out they had a pig, she was nose to nose with it when she saw it and asked what it was when I told her that it was the same thing that hot dogs and ham were made of she said she did not want any. That changed the next day when we had ham burgers. She is still young and she will make up her own mind as to what she wants to eat as she grows up. Good luck

I would advise that she didnt watch that stuff. My dad and brothers were hunters. They made home made sausage. It was discusting. I love meat but dont want to see the process of it. Its a whole circle of life thing. But I still dont want to see blood and guts. Also explain to her that God intended for animals to be nurishment to our bodies and our bodies actually need to eat meat. I am not one that is all for veggitarians vegans and being told that is the way I should also live my life. I dont think its right or healthy espically for a little tike. But theres lots of mommas that would completly dissagree. Good luck. Sorry she got grossed out by that show. I still dont like to watch them.

Hi, my daughter is only three and she doesnt like to eat meat either.She started not liking it when she was a liitle over one years old,not beacause it came from an animal but because it tasted bad. When i was little I hated meat especially hamburger and chicken because they tasted the way the animal smelt!?!, so I knew how to deal with it.I didnt start eating meat until about 3 1/2 years ago(when i was pregnant!)I always made sure I had enough of vitamins and all that good stuff by pureeing the veggies i didnt like and putting them into my food.My daughter eats a salad everyday so i got lucky with that, but if he is having problems tell him to look for the book Deceptfully Delicious, it has great recipes for kids. Hope I was of help to you.

Does your son take his daughter to church? She should be taught that cretain animals were put here for man to eat. It is not curel to eat them. Explain that if the animals were not used for food that there would be so many of them that there would not be enough food for them to eat and they would get sick and die, and that would be very bad. Four is a little young to understand about the food chain, but the seeds can be planted and she'll understand later. He can explain that the animals she saw were not pets.Explain that the pecans fall from the trees for us to eat, that the beautiful flowers grow so we can pick them and bring them inside to make the house beautiful and certain (not all) animals are created so that we can have food to eat to keep us healthy.

This happened to a guy I used to work with - his 5 year old just decided she would be a vegetarian one day. So he had her spend a day with a good friend of mine who worked with us who is a vegetarian, figuring it would either make her think twice about not eating meat anymore or make her become a vegetarian herself. Once she realized she couldn't eat hamburgers, she was cured. I think it would be good to keep reminding her of all the things she already likes that are meat while not forcing her to eat it.

Hi, A.: I love Anna's advice. It really does depend on the child. My 5 yo daughter did the same thing at 4, but I took the time, many times, to explore and explain the circle of life with her, specifically, the food chain. I also explained the choices that people can make. She already understood about dinosaurs being carnivores, herbivores, or omnivores from her school so it made explaining that people can be those as well. We talked about hunting because that is featured in several Disney movies. We talked about those who hunt for food vs. those who hunt for sport. We talked about poachers because that's a big part of various animal shows on Animal Planet and at Disney Animal Kingdom where we vacationed. I guess what I'm trying to say is that even at 4, you can take the correct, age-appropriate dialog and talk intelligently to your children/grandchildren. Many people seem to think that kids can't understand certain life issues at 4 and they are somewhat correct, but you can start laying the foundation now for the more difficult learning opportunities that lie ahead. Just stay at your child's level of understanding -- don't dumb things down, but don't go into gory details. There was a time when all kids grew up knowing where meat came from because they lived on farms -- now-a-days, many of us are now children of the city and very far removed from the realities of the human food chain.

Best wishes! S. (mom of a happy omnivore)

Ok, he was tired after work and not really thinking about the implications of watching a show like that with a 4 yr old... But since the the can of worms is already opened...

Small children tend to attribute human characteristics and feelings to animals... Which explains why they bond so well with stuffed animals. My concern if it was my daughter would be that I don't want explaining this topic to undercut the development of her empathy and consideration for other's feelings. So he should be prepared to be patient with the topic...

Here's a link to a childrens book on Amazon that discusses the food chain: http://www.amazon.com/Chains-Lets-Read-Find-Out-Science-S...

Here is another link to a webpage that discusses why we need food: http://www.feedingminds.org/level1/lesson1/obj1.htm

Of course, the book is geared for ages 5-8. Your son should use his most sensitive paternal judgement on whether she is ready for more information on this topic. Ultimately, he doesn't want her to start waking up with nightmares...

When my nephew was small, he suddenly asked "Why does chicken have bones?!" That freaked my sister out because she really didn't want to have the food chain talk with him at that age. My husband and I decided to try and avoid that issue by calling meat by the 'butcher name': poultry, pork, beef, venison... Hardest to do with poultry because everyone calls it chicken. One day, I accidentally asked my 2 yo if she wanted chicken nuggets and she started making chuckling sounds... (uh oh!) So we're trying to be more proactive in calling things by their meat names instead of as farm animal, hoping that will distance the topic.

Good luck.

WOW....yes I have experienced this. They are so little and just can't comprehend it in their little brain!!!
My daughter did the same thing when she was young.....she still does not eat a lot of red meat but she does eat chicken. Once in a while, she'll eat a steak but not often. I think that is just a personal health choice on her part --then again, you never know. Eventually, hopefully, it will flee from your granddaughters memory and she will forget all about it. Tell your son to give it some time and do not force her to eat meat if she doesn't want to eat it. She will eventually figure out that she does or does not like it. Take care.

My first advice, is not to let her watch shows like that. It may also give her nightmares. Explain to her that people need meat to stay healthy and god put animals on the planet to feed us. Let her make her own choice on what she eats, but try to give her meat when everyone else at the dinner table is eating. I think it will pass very fast though. Good Luck

I think this is a girl thing. My daughter went through the same realization at that age. We said she did not have to eat meat anymore if she did not want to. That lasted about 2 days and every thing went back to normal. My son also asked about meat when he saw a show about chickens ( he is 4). It did not phase him at all and he was ready to raise chickens so we could eat them!

A.,I agree. I would not force the issue with her,she is still young. What part of town do you live. I could use a friend too! I have small children ages 6 and 3. I am also a massage therapist. Just curious,how did you get into the health field??? This sounds like something I would like to know more about. My name is Cindy and my email is ____@____.com

Depends on the kid. One daughter was freaked out and said "How horrible" and then went right on eating her chicken nuggets,tacos and bacon. The other one said "How horrible" and now chicken nuggets are just about the only meat that she eats-and even that was a while before she went back to them. Sometimes she'll eat some bacon. My 16 yr old son announced he was going to be a vegetarian and stuck with it for about 4 days and then got tired of beans and cheese- back to hamburgers and chicken. I will say all three of my kids eat a pretty small amount of beef because of the "yuck" factor AND cows are big and pretty. Just see what she does. Feed her what he normally does- if she says "Oh no. I'm not eating that nice animal." then offer her some other protein. Pretty soon she'll either become a vegetarian or go back to her old ways. I'm betting it's the latter. And my son had a 'vegetarian' friend when he was younger- the whole family was vegetarian- and that kid couldn't wait to order hamburgers whenever he went out to eat with us. lol

We have always been "matter of fact" about where our food comes from.... Its just part of our language. My husband is a hunter and we eat a lot of wild game so this is part of our culture.
Steak is cow - eggs come from chickens, bacon is pig etc.
On another note - the first question from my pediatrician is - are my children having red meat at least 3x a week?
Good luck,
T.

I have a neighbor who had a similar thing happen at the dining table. They were eating dinner and their daughter asked "why do they call this chicken?". When it was explained to her, "because it is a chicken", the child freaked out. They told her that the chickens that the family eats are not pets that these are special chickens that are raised to be eaten.

They left it at that. She still ate chicken nuggets the next night and the mom says the child never brought it up again.

The child is a teen now and still eats meat products.