J.-
I think your son and my daughter are TWINS!!! That is EXACTLY my same situation... my dauther will be 3 at the end of March, she weighs about 25 pounds and is a bit short for her age. She has not drank ANY MILK since we forced her to give up her bottle around 18 months. Her only form of calcium is the little bit that she gets from her apple juice, and cheese. (She lives for that stuff!)
Our Ped is always shocked when I tell her that she does not drink milk. Since shes continued to grow, they aren't all that concerened either, and suggested that I ONLY give her milk to drink. I just have not been able to bring myself to do that... plus, I really don't think it would work... she is very stubborn like me... ;O)
The other day we were at the zoo, and she slipped on the ice. That night she was limping... so I told her that she needed to start drinking milk. I thought I had her convinced, until she took about two of the tinyest sips on earth, and ditched the sippy cup.
So yeah... I'm with you... e-mail me if you'd like to talk it over further.... I can't wait to read what everyone suggests for you!
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Jen~