My Son Has a Possible Half Brother

Updated on March 12, 2007
K.O. asks from Virginia Beach, VA
14 answers

that my ex husband says he didnt know about but they are having a paternity test done to see. in the meantime i am concerned this is going to affect the child support provided for our son. i completely feel like the other mother has every right to collect child support as well (if infact it is his child), but am concerned this will be deducted from the amount my son receives. does anyone know if this is true or what i should do to protect my son's financial future? (we reside in VA) i am already recieving support thru a court order as of april last year. and i do not receive alimony, we werent together very long.

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A.B.

answers from Charlotte on

Hey K.,

I was reading the replies you recieved and Brione is right, it is the same way in NC. It was explained to me that whoever files for it first gets the most and so on...good luck

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R.W.

answers from Norfolk on

Child Support is based on what the state regulations are. The fact that your husband pays/or may have to pay support for another child shouldn't in anyway affect what you get. I don't know what state you live in but here in VA how much a noncustodial parent pays is based on what each parent makes. There is a base rate for a child and then each parent contributes that. I hope that makes sense.

If it turns out that your ex does have another child and will have to pay support then I guess he better get a second job or cut his expenses to take care of both his children.

Good luck! And DO NOT let him talk you into taking less. The fact that he fathered another child is not your or your sons fault or problem.

3 moms found this helpful
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B.P.

answers from Charlotte on

K.,
I noticed that you have received conflicting responses. I am an attorney licensed in Virginia but I have not practiced family law there and I am not attempting to give you legal advice. That said, the other child should not affect how much you receive unless your ex tries to go back to court over your support. If the other mom goes for support, when the court does the child support guidelines, they look at the amount your ex makes. Then they deduct things like the amount of child support and alimony he's already paying to someone (in this case, you) to determine an adjusted income. How much he pays to the other child will be based on this adjusted income.

It should only effect your support amount if your ex tries to take you back to court, with the other mom, to say to the court that he can't afford the amount of support he's paying for both children. Then the court could reexamine the support and instead of taking your support amount out of his income to determine how much to give the other kid, the court could start over and treat the children the same. You would still have a good argument that your son was receiving support first and that he shouldn't be punished for it by the other child. And it would take a lot of effort on the part of your ex to get you back into court.

Where in VA are you? I may be able to refer you to an attorney should you need one.

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S.L.

answers from Norfolk on

K.,

I would like to say. I'm sorry. But I do not think it will cut your child support. He will have to make another arrangement with the other child's mother. If he does, you can go back to court and file again or you can go to child enforcement about it as well. Hope that helps.

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A.D.

answers from Charlotte on

Every state is different, I used to live in Fl and my childs father paid child support based on his yearly income. When my son was two his father had another baby with someone else and they based that child support on his yearly earnings as well. The father fought it, stating he was already paying a child support payment to us and the Judge denied him stating he is a grown man he should have used protection if he didn't want to pay for a baby!! How your state works I am not sure but if your sons payment has already been judged and ordered I don't think it would be changed. Call the courthouse and ask them this question, most will answer simple questions that aren't giving legal advice. Good Luck!

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S.P.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi K.,
I live in NC. From my previous experience with a similar situation that you are in. The child support that you receive for your son can be reduced if your ex- husband requests it. Of course, he has to show reasonable proof and reasons necessary as to why it has to occur. The child support that you receive can be affected whenever a review for your case occurs also. Of course, a review usually occur every three years (at least in NC). However, the same stipulations mentioned before ( proof given of reasons to reduce) has to be exposed in court. I mostly agree with what the lawyer from VA said below. Child support is determined from an adjusted income. More than likely, having another child will affect that amount. I would encourage you to check with your local child support enforecement agency

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J.R.

answers from Charleston on

This should not affect the child support you receive. Does your ex live in SC? If so, what will happen is they will take into account that your ex already is paying support when they figure the other child's support. I hope this helps. Here is a site that shows how child support is calculated is SC -

http://www.state.sc.us/dss/csed/calculator.htm

J.

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G.S.

answers from Fayetteville on

K.

Unfortunately yes it will. i can't say exact numbers for NC but take NY for example. If a parent has to pay child support for only 1 child it's 17% of their income. If they have to support 2 or more it can only be a total of 25% MAX that the parent is forced to pay for all children.No matter if it's 1 mother or 10 mothers. It then get divided. So more than likely u will encounter these issues.

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J.M.

answers from Charlotte on

They cannot reduce your child support b/c of another child. They will tell him to get another job if he seeks a reduction b/c he doesn't make enough money, They don't care if he has 20 kids the amount set is what he is required to pay. If you are concerned about him not making enough to support both children then that is going to have to be taken up with your ex-husband.

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S.J.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi K.,

No information about child support, but sorry to hear you're going through this. Hope all works out in your favor!

Good luck!

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M.P.

answers from Spartanburg on

If you are already receiving child support on an official basis, this shouldn't effect it. By official I mean in writing and approved by the court. If you two just have a verbal agreement, then you need to make it official pronto. A court will not take a verbal agreement into consideration when assigning child support to another child, so in that situation, it will be effected. I hope this makes sense. Kinda like "first come, first serve" but it's who gets to court first, not who's born first.

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S.J.

answers from Norfolk on

This happened to me when my ex husband and I were married. Yes, it will affect the child support you receive. I don't know how much, but it will have an affect on it. Child support is based on the # of children and the amount of money the two of you make.
Now, for telling your son. I would take that gradually. My daughter did not know for about a year or so that the boy she had been playing with at her Dad's house was in fact, her half brother. I let HIM explain it to her. She seemed OK with it and was very happy with the fact she had another brother.

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S.R.

answers from Fayetteville on

It depends on the states you, your ex, and the other mother are in, but if you are already receiving, it will not affect you. He will continue to pay you whatever the amount is and then have to pay her whatever that state agrees on. We are going through this right now. I am still married to my husband but he has another child recently, outside our marriage. It's in the courts right now, but we are still paying her. If I were to divorce him even now, since my children were first, I would have first rights (according to a lawyer I spoke to) and then to her. In our case now, because he has two other children with me, the WI courts take that into consideration so that he does not pay too much to her and have nothing left for us. Him having another child to pay for is not supposed to affect you or your child for any support you receive. If he tries to tell you it is going to, you can seek legal aid for clarification. I hope this helps.

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A.D.

answers from Asheville on

If the other mother does file for support then it could affect your child support. Lots of things could affect it though. Different jobs he may have, no job at all as well. While the money from him helps I would also plan to support him financially myself. Count your lucky stars that he pays!

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