My Six Year Old Will Not Stop Lying

My daughter too went through a lying phase. She would lie even when she knew I knew she did something. From what I've read, often kids up to this age may not be meaning to lie. They are simply saying what they WISH was true (that they had not done the naughty behavior that you're accusing them of). I've read that it's better not to confront them in a way you know will lead to a lie. While you may be tempted to ask "Did you write on your face with marker?" (to which he may say "no", because this is the reality he wishes for at that point) - instead say, "Honey, it was fine to write on the balloon with marker. That was really funny. But we don't want to get marker on our faces. Let's go and wash that off." You're telling him it's not acceptable and rectifying the situation, but you're not being as accusatory and causing him to go on defense. It might help to keep the situation from escalating. I hope this helps. And keep in mind that this phase too shall pass...
:)

J.,

That certainly is a tough one but with my kids I started early. I pulled them aside each time to have a special talk with them in a quiet room with no distractions. I, used my faith and explained the consequences of a lie to my oldest and put the responsibility on her. She now knows that whatever attempt to lie is eventually uncovered and absolutely cannot feel good inside. After a while, she has learned to divulge the truth and that no matter how bad it may be, we can face it together. My one year old is next in line.

Good luck.

hopefully some of the moms can give you some creative ideas to get him to stop unfortunatly your not alone my son will most times blame his sister for everything that happens even if I see him do it or I know its something she cant reach or do he dosent lie about anything else the only thing I do about it is tell him that it upsets mommy if he isnt telling me what really happened he normally will feel bad that he made me unhappy and tell me the truth and I'll inform him that next time to tell me the truth even if I'm upset abouty what he did it pleases me to know that he's being honest about it but that seems to work better on his sister then him she will own up to stuff she does even if she has to be punished for it my son just blames his sister I havent figured out how to get him to tell me the truth the first time around I'm guessing that most kids go threw a period of that though good luck

J.,
My 7 year old also has an issue seeing things clearly too. :) I don't call it lying yet...Dr. Sears has written about this and developmentally kids aren't really capable of truly lying until around 7,8 years old. I remember him being across the street and I came outside and yelled, Did you cross the street? and he said 'no'. They are old enough to understand what will get them into trouble (or what they think will get them into trouble) but not old enough to tell a lie - a BELIEVABLE story made up on purpose (did he think I could really believe he got across the street some other way?)

My approach is now to not call attention to it in the younger ones and start to address it in a non-confrontational way as they near 7 years old. You could google Dr. Sears or search his site for more info or pick up a copy of his 'The Discipline Book' which has given me ideas on how to handle many situations.

D.

my son does the same thing, I know my son is just trying to get attention from me so what i have done is i point out tell him i knwo your lying and lying is not right so until you can be honest you cant' play with friends, video games etc. Within five min he is telling the whole truth and then i thank him for being honest but since you lied first you have one hour of nothing....(it depends on what he lied and did) like hitting his sister he would loose privelages for a day or two...since i started that i only get a lie every once in a while and they are usually for the cute silly stuff....good luck. also i see you are and autistic support teacher maybe you could help me my daughter has been diagnosed with pdd and is going thru further testing to narrow down the diagnoses...or what part of the spectrum she is on..and the school district put her in a pre k autism class and i need to make a picture schedule do you think you could give me some ideas or how to she is 3 will be four in sept. ____@____.com

Wow, I love mamasourcing!! I was just getting ready to blog on the exact topic. I have a 4 1/2 year old son who just recently started doing the exact same thing. Totally minor little "white lies" but enough to upset me that he is constantly telling fibs. I am l;ooking for advice on the exact same thing. Also- if anyone knows a good childrens book out there that teaches on this subject that would be great as well.