My 2 yr old girl (she'll be three in Oct) has been potty trained for about 4 months. She is doing great except for pooping in the potty. She refuses to even try; cries and screams whenever I even mention it. She tells me when she needs to poop, we get a pull up, she does her buisness and then we change her so I think it's just a control thing. She is VERY stubborn and strong willed so trying to change her mind about anything is hard. I have offered toys, prizes, everything you can think of. She tells me she will poop in the potty when she "gets big" or when she is 3. I've read books, articles and don't know what else to try. What has worked for you?
Well, it took a litte while and I basically had to just quit giving her a pull up, but she finally poops in the potty. Once she did it, she was soo proud of herself. I do have to give her a mild stool softner just to help her a little (it was recommended by her doctor) She kept true to her word; when she turned 3, she started pooping in the potty!!! Thanks for all the great advice!!
Hi A.,
I have a daughter also, she is now 7 but when we potty trained her she did the same thing. She was terrified to poop in the potty. Just let her be and it will work itself out. It just finally clicked with her one day and she started going in the potty. Remember it will work itself out she won't be pooping in a pull up forever. Ha Ha
Well it looks as if a lot of people are going through or went through the same thing as you.I did too,with my youngest son,with the exception he WOULD go on the Big Potty after an extended period of time...great exercise for your legs and arms,eventually he would go in the potty,but still preferred the BP.However I have a twist to this story....he had too,and still has to get completely undressed!!!He's now 16yrs!!!Also until he was in the second grade he WOULD NOT go at school or wipe his own butt,talk about a nightmare,hope yours is only the little potty part...GOOD LUCK,R.
Sounds like your diagnosis is correct...stubborn and strong willed!! :) My son was the same way and I finally stopped beating my head against the wall and waited until he was ready. It was not long after that he gave in and did it. He knew he had to potty on his own to go to 3 yr old preschool and he wanted to go, so low and behold, he waited until the week before classes started to do it! Your bio says she's almost three and she already told you she would do it then, so maybe just deal with it until her birthday. At least she's not pooping in her pants :)
When it was time to "poop" our daughter got to use her Leap Pad- a lot of people buy game boys to accomplish the same thing- something special to get her to sit for a while. Now Elizabeth just reads books, but you can't get her out of the bathroom! Let her pick out special panties so that she won't want to get them dirty. We also used reward charts that increased with the frequency that she used the potty. So after 1 time she got to bake cookies- the next reward came after she went 2 times and so on until the rewards were 10 times apart. They were rewards that she chose ahead of time- going to the park, visiting a friend, etc. Good luck- it is still a little early, so don't worry- easier said than done I know.
Well, the first thing that comes to my mind is Do not get put the pull ups on her. Those pullups are telling her its ok to go potty there instead of the potty. I thought my son would never get potty trained and then finally figured it out. I took away the pull ups. Oh he hated so badly using the potty in his big boy underpants. Good luck.
That sounds so familiar. My son is now 11 but when he was 3 he was doing the same thing. But I refused to put pull-ups on him. He went so far as to stand in front of the bathroom door and did his "business" right on the carpet. Well after the "LONG" talk and "fussing" that me and my husband gave him, he didn't do that again and started using the potty. I do think it's a control thing. Just refuse to put the pull-up on her.
He still remembers doing that too.
GOOD LUCK! :)
Maybe she is afraid of it. I have three children and ALL of them were afraid of their poop at first. Then one day I they started saying "bye bye" as they flushed and thought it was a game. It may sound silly or gross, but they thought it was funny and it worked. She will do it when she is ready (and I know it is frustrating). Don't let her see you get bent out of shape about it and maybe she will come around.
Just constantly encouraging and waiting is what worked for us. Our son did the SAME thing, and we did the same things as you, and he would not go poop until he was almost 4. Hopefully it will be sooner for you! One day, he just decided to go, and that was it! He went from then on, and we were so happy. He STILL tells us that he gets to go to Chuck E Cheese whenever he poops, which was his reward for the first time. LOL Just be patient - it will happen!
Pooping in the potty is an issue for a lot of kids. For some reason, they are kind of attached to it. I would suggest two things: first, when she poops in the pull-up, dump it in the toilet. I started doing this when my daughter was about 18 months old and just thinking about potty-training. The first time I did this she screamed, "My poopy." I explained to her that it needed to go with its friends, and she's been happy to flush it down. We had to put it in the toilet every time after that until she was potty trained. The second thing I would suggest is to stop worrying about it. A lot of potty-training is a control thing. I was battling my daughter at age 2 1/2 to go on the potty at all. Finally one day I told her, "you know what to do and when you need to do it, and when you decide you want to go on the potty, then you can wear panties." I made it completely her decision and didn't mention the potty to her again. A week later she said she wanted to wear big-girl panties and has been going on the potty ever since. If you want one more book to read, I would suggest something by Dr. Terry Brazelton. He is the leading pediatrician on potty-issues. He is of the opinion that we tend to force kids to be potty trained and we do it at too early an age and it has the result of leading to bad results, some of which can be very hazardous to a kid's health. So I would also say be patient with her. She'll get it and do it when she's ready and that's the best time for her to do it (though I know it's nasty having to change the big-girl diapers!). She'll be better off for it in the long-run. Good luck.
My son does that. He'll be 3 next March. He pretty much trained himself on peeing in the potty, but won't poop in it. It just upsets him. He tells me when he needs a diaper. I figure he'll do it when he's ready. The more you force, the more reluctant they get.
My niece did that too!! Her mom eventually bit the bullet and put away the pull-ups for good. They both had to clean out underpants for about a week, dunking the panties in the potty to reinforce where poop was supposed to go, but then the miracle lightbulb went off in her head and she finally started pooping in the potty.
I've been training my 3 year old son this summer, and what helped him (and his big sister, and my neighbor, and my sister's kids:) ) is a children's book called "Everyone Poops" by Taro Gomi. It is a little graphic, but it really helped all of these kids with the lightbulb moment, realizing that poop goes in the potty. We would sit in the bathroom around the time of day I knew he usually had a BM, with him on the potty, and read the book 2 or 3 times during a session. Then we'd take a break and do something different for 1/2 hour and then try again. Eventually he put 2 & 2 together.
Good luck to you!
I understand what you are going through! My daughter wouldn't poop in the potty either. She held it for days when we first started potty training. I was so worried that she would get terribly constipated, so I gave her lots of liquid (diluted juice and chocolate milk) and foods that have softened her stool in the past.
Finally, she spent a day running to the potty saying "poop!". Once on the potty, she would squirm for a few seconds, then jump off and play some more. A few minutes later, and she would do the whole routine over again. At last, she couldn't hold it any longer and was acting really desperate. I read a book to her to keep her on the potty for longer than a few seconds, and she did her business. It took a couple of weeks of this type of behavior and a few times cleaning poop out of her panties when she didn't make it in time, for her to start wanting to poop on the potty. She asked for pull ups too, but I told her she was big enough to use the potty and wear panties. It was a test of wills, and I almost gave up on several occassions. We haven't been at potty training very long (3-4 weeks), so I'm no expert. But, I have seen great progress.
One more thing, I make sure she can have her feet firmly planted when she goes to the potty. She is either on a child's potty with her feet on the floor or on a regular toilet (w/ adapter seat) with her feet on a stool. I bought 3 stools before I found one the right height. It made a difference, though.
Good luck!
When I read your request, I thought I had written it - every part of your message fit my daughter to a "T". She just celebrated her 3rd bday last week. I'm sorry to say that she DID NOT go poop! I've tried everyone's suggestions (family/friends)and nothing has worked. She has her 3 yo doctor appt tomorrow and I'm going to ask for suggestions. I'll let you know if I find a solution that works. Good luck --- to both of us (all of us) huh!
