My Husband Thinks I'm Crazy :)

the pain was not as bad as women had told me. in fact, i was embarrassed to find out i had been in labor and was dialated so far i should have come much earlier. the bad thing is i had not been walking because i fell and tore my ACL. I was out of shape and it took 45 minutes of pushing which was exhausting.

If you have Netflix watch the move by Ricky Lake -The Business of Being Born, it's in the instant que. I don't love the title, however lots of information for what you are looking for.

I'm 8kid's dad's wife.
I had 7 children through the LaMaze method. I wanted LaMaze, because I wanted to be awake and alert, my mom had what they called twilight sleep and I didn't want that.
I have easy pregnancies, ie I don't have morning sickness, edema, etc.
The first time, I simply read the book explaining the breathing exercises. For 2 and 3 I took classes. Taking a class with your husband is the best as it gives the coach training to help you. My husband was not the best coach for telling me when or how to breathe, but he at least knew I should and reminded me if I started hyperventilating. Where he was good was at having me squeeze his hand. The idea is if I'm squeezing his hand, you are not tensing your uterus and allowing it to do the work it should. LaMaze is great for focus training too! This way I was feeling my body at each stage and thinking it through rather than panicking, tensing and intensifying the "pain". Will the contractions hurt---absolutely---but if you are prepared, focus, relax and breathe---you can do it!!! The roughest time I had was transition stage---getting the baby to crown so you can push. For me this stage only lasted 10 - 15 minutes..it was when the contractions lasted a minute and were a minute apart---so basically were one right on top of the next. But at the end--- I was able to push babies right out. And as you say, I was able to get up and walk around right after. The first baby, I was sore below because I needed an episiotomy and being the first stretched that area pretty good. After that, I was up and about almost immediately.
I think everyone should try at least once to have a natural birth.We are blessed that we forget what the "labor pain" felt like. We still remember it, but the what it actually felt like diminishes. However by the time I had #7 and #8, I really did not want to go through it again. On my seventh child I requested and epidural, but it was given to me too late, so the only thing it helped out on was afterbirth contractions.
Number 8 was a successful epidural and I loved it..

First time I felt all warm and secure in the whole natural childbirth thing...IT was AWFUL! 24 hours, and it took me weeks to recover. Second time around I did an epidural, was walking 20 minutes later...and LOVED IT! Good for you for trying it, there is nothing on earth that could convince me to go natural again!

I will recommend that you go in with a "plan," but be willing to revamp that plan when the time comes. Don't have your mind set on one option...and only one option. I say try it, but be willing to make changes if necessary...and don't be disappointed if it doesn't go as planned.

Try it! I had epidurals with the first 3 babies. Then just like you, wanted to just see what it would be like. The next 3 babies I went natural. Yes, it feels like your going to die, but it's amazing!

You're not crazy at all. You will not find another opportunity better than natural childbirth to experience primal reality. It's so worth it to really live it. Yes, it is very painful but also very do-able. Trust your body to tell you what you need to handle it. Move, breath, vocalize. Don't fear the sensations, welcome them and stay in the moment so that you feel immediately when they begin to subside. You will not regret it. You will be washed in it, humbled by it, strengthened & empowered. You will feel like you conquered the world. You will emerge from it confident and ready to love your family and baby with a renewed energy and appreciation. Go for it!!

Have you ever had horrible, horrible cramps when menstruating.. The kind that you had to curl up in a ball?

That is what it feels like plus a little more...

Here is the deal.. No one died from the pain.. Concentrate on your breathing and remember the above.. No one ever died from the pain..

Let the Labor and delivery nurses make suggestions and make sure your husband is right there with you.. If he follows the Lamaze protocol or can distract or change your focus when you think you cannot go that little bit more, you will get through it. He will also be able to advocate for you and remind you what your plan and goal is.

I had horrible cramps when I was young off and on for years..That is what the pain felt like at the end right before I pushed..

My husband was a great coach and just kept me calm and kept telling me he loved me and talking about the things we had plans for and all of a sudden once I said to the nurse.. "ok I cannot go any further".. she checked on me and said "time to push!"

Give it a try, you already have some idea.. Do your best.. Congratulations!

Okay, I apologize in advance. I've had a lot of children so this may be long. ;)
I had my first 4 in the hospital. The first two were inductions with epidurals. #3 was so fast that I had no time (3cm to birth in 30 minutes) for anything. #4 I had "natural" labor in a hospital until everyone, including me, thought it was time for an epidural. It was a very scary time for us. My husband felt so helpless to help me while they were doing the epidural. They almost threw him out of the room (he was asserting his position as my husband, but was not loud, pushy, overbearing. He was trying to make sure I was okay-I was not- and they told him to shut up or get out). It was a nightmare, which scared both of us. #5 we decided to try a birthing center, which was wonderful. I was in a birthing pool for labor, but not birth. It hurt, yes, but was not unbearable. After the birth, I felt amazing. The only time I felt so good after a birth was with #3, which was with no drugs, but too fast. #6 we did a home birth. AHhhhh! Amazing! We will never go back to a hospital setting if the situation allows for it (and if I am blessed enough to get pregnant again). There is nothing like being in your own home with your own family and a couple of highly trained women taking care of you as needed. I had so much support, and everything was perfect. They refered to my husband for decisions concerning the baby, which was perfect. And, I just cuddled up in my bed with my baby and whichever one of my family (husband, children, etc) that wanted to be there. I got to stay upstairs in my bed for a week and never have to even go downstairs, much less get in a car to go home! Loved it! No stress. The midwives came back the next day, at 3 days, 1 week, and 2 weeks for our well baby check ups. I didn't even have to go out to them! Heaven! Baby was not exposed to other germs. But, the natural part is hard and very much worth it.
I recommend reading The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer. Excellent read!

I gave birth to my first with an epidural which I got at 9 cm dilation. It was a long extremely painful induced labor and I wish I had gotten the epidural 12 hours sooner. Contractions produced as a result of pitocin are NOT the same as natural labor contractions. They are closer together which prevents rest between and they are intense from the start, not building in intensity like natural labor. I could never recommend skipping an epidural if you are to endure an induction of labor.
However, with my second and third babies I went into natural labor and did not have any IV meds or epidural and it was GREAT! I had 4 hours of tolerable labor and then another hour of intense, painful contractions followed by less than 10 min pushing and a beautiful delivery of a 9 lb + baby. I won't lie, it was PAINFUL, but worth it to me. I have never felt such an intense "high" as I did after delivering these kids naturally. I also bonded to them immediately and was up walking around the room within a half hour. With my first, recovery was so much slower and I didn't bond right away. Perhaps this is coincidence, but knowing the power of hormones released during natural labor and delivery, I don't think so. You might want to watch "The Business of Being Born" on Netflix. It's a documentary that just might give you some help in making your decision to attempt to forgo the epidural. Best wishes to you and yours! Oh, one less bit of advice: Try the tub for pain during labor. It really helps make it through transition. Nurse Midwife Mom

I had both my babies au natural and it was fine. Yes, it hurts. It is tolerable to me. I remember with the first one that it burned more than painful. I wouldnt do drugs unless if i absolutely had to. I loved being able to experience every moment. It went so quickly to. I had episiotimies with both my kids to. The best part was being able to walk to the recovery room :-)

And this is why men don't have babies ;)

My husband tbought it was great that I wanted to try it on my own with no meds interfering, he just didn't want me to do it at home, was too nervous. I ended up having to be induced and made it ten very painful hours with no help. Got an epidural finally, it was the only way I was going to get through it and I knew it despite feeling defeated. Now I wish I hadn't been so disappointed and hard on myself. All that really mattered was getting her here!

My second of course I thought would be easier, but she was a 9pm breech! I did appreciate the csection in many ways, and giving up my idea of a perfect birth was easier the second time, again, all that mattered was a healthy baby. And three years later one is still slow going and the other a little backwards and difficult! :)

I didn't do an epidural with my 2nd and 3rd child. I did with the first. It was an amazing experience that I wouldn't trade for the world. Each person is different though. If you decide to do it that way, I would either get a doula or take some natural child birth classes. Actually I would get a doula no matter what. Definitely worth it. Both times it was free for me, so check around in your area. They help you through the experience and help you focus and take some of the pressure off hubby.

I'd personally much rather have the epidural but I don't knock ones that want to do it natural like you. kuddo's to you for wanting to try it! I can't stand pain and I'd much rather be comfortable. Good luck on whatever you decide to do. :)

I went natural with both. First was quick and easy, second was much longer and more painful. But, if you have a good doula or nurse with you - someone who supports your decision to go natural - it's not too bad. And if I had to do it over, I'd do it the same way!

Blessings to you!

I'm with your husband but I have never birthed myself (adoption, not related to infertility). I think medical intervention to make anything easier is a good thing. I had pain meds after spinal fusion surgeries. I wouldn't have received "extra credit" for going without.

I had my only child without pain meds and it was amazing. the contractions were painful, but not so strong that I could not handle them. Being upright and walking around I think really helped me progress very fast, my active labor was only 4 hours (from the first contraction until she was born), though my water had broken 3 hours earlier.

When I was pregnant we had already decided that we were going to be an only child family and I wanted to have that experience of natural labor and childbirth, since it is probably going to be a once in a lifetime thing for me.

Should I ever have another one (though we probably won't) I would definitely do the same. The sense of accomplishment I felt was awesome and it really gave me a completely new sense of self as a woman and relationship with my own body.

Good luck.

PS: if you want a great natural birth experience find a midwife! It almost impossible with a OB/Gyn.

Everyone is different and every birth is different. I had no drugs or epidural with either of mine, but I don't think that that is that best experience for everyone. Some people don't want the experience of natural childbirth. It doesn't make their experience any less wonderful.

With my daughter I had a textbook pregnancy and deliver. I delivered her in the water and it was a beautiful thing. It was also really fast. about 2 hours from the water braking to delivery. With my son it was not easy or beautiful. It was painful and stressful... but he was two and half month premature and I was on magnesium sulfate to try to stop the labor, and then pitocin to make make the labor happen because they couldn't stop it.

The more relaxed you can be about your delivery the less painful it will be. Remember to breathe deeply and then rapidly when the baby is on it's way and let the baby do the work. I am very glad that I had my kids naturally, but it isn't for everyone. I found my birth experience(s) to be really empowering.

Good luck!

I had my first three natural and my husband talked me into getting an epi on the fourth, it only worked on one side and I have nothing but terrible back issues since. I say do what works for you! I personally like natural so I can move around afterward but to each their own. Not sure how big your babies have been but my largest was 9lb's 12oz's and my last was 9lb's 8'oz's there was an 8lb 6oz and 8lb 5oz in between. It's possible to have large babes without the epi.:) Best of luck mama!

I had 4 natural births. I did the Bradley classes to prepare but was willing to have an epidural if needed. However, by the time I needed it, I was ready to deliver... too late to bother. I thought natural childbirth was very manageable. Since my mom had 24 hour labors, I was prepared for that, and when my first came in a little over 4 hours, it seemed easier than what I expected. You might want to go through the Bradley classes and then decide. And yes, for me, each labor was shorter than the one before.

I had a c-section for my first (breech baby) and just a month ago had a natural second birth. It was so empowering. It was hard work but totally worth every moment. I feel so darn proud of myself. :) My labor was 12 hours with 1.5 hours of pushing. (That was a really long 1.5 hours!!!)

I say go for it! But you will need hubby's support or someone else if you don't think he will be there for you. You could always hire a doula.

When I had my third I felt like you. What I did was made it clear that natural was my goal but if I felt I was in over my head I wanted access to the drugs. Well when I wanted the drugs I couldn't get them because I was ready to have him. It really wasn't much different than when I had my first two.

Mind you I found no clear benefits so my fourth I got the drugs right off the bat.

It depends on who you are. It sounds like you have nice length labor. Pushing time is a real killer, and that was only five minutes. You would have survived:-) And, since pushing was so short, you would probably have healed quite quickly.

My first was 36 hours of labor, 3 hours of pushing. My bottom turned black and blue, and I also hemorrhaged after the baby was born. I could not walk. All the dream natural birth stuff didn't seem to apply in my situation. Everything was very difficult. I did it again and again...hehe...and the labor is a killer for me. The front labor (so if you don't get back labor) is quite manageable. It does get intense, but it's overall much easier than back labor. I always get back labor. It's gotten worse. I actually think something is wrong with my back because it was a sciatic nerve type of back labor where it radiated the pain through out my whole body. Definitely more pain than I'd ever felt. I got front labor at the same time, it and wasn't nearly as painful. So, IF you don't get back labor, you might not find it all the awful at all. If you do get back labor, and it's more normal (not sciatic nerve pain), it'll more difficult than just front labor, but also do-able. If you get the sciatic nerve back labor pain, that can push you to your limits...but still doable.

I always felt amazing after I accomplished a natural birth. It's definitely worth the effort. If you have one in the hospital naturally, definitely look into a doula:-)

Oh, and I wouldn't say that each birth gets easier. My first was my most difficult, so it's true for me. But I know other women who are surprised with more difficult births later on.

The REALLY difficult part is the pushing. If the baby pops out, it's a breeze and doesn't seem that difficult. But if the baby does not pop out and you're pushing FOREVER, that is much harder than dealing with the labor!

The pushing also seems to determine how fast you'll heal afterwards. My first was IN the birth canal for 3 hours (very painful to heal from). My 2nd was IN the birth canal for 45 minutes (very painful to heal from too, and he was 10 lbs 11 oz!!). My 3rd popped out in 10 minutes, and I was AMAZED at how much easier it was to heal from that. My labor with her was 29 hours, whereas the baby before her was only 15 hours...and since she popped out faster, the healing was easier.

Then my 4th was a c-section (placenta previa). It was FAR and AWAY the easiest of them all. I was shocked! But I do seem to take longer to heal than many women when it came to natural.

I probably told you more than you wanted. I say go for it! You'll never regret trying (and by "trying" I mean "accomplishing" because unless something goes wrong, you CAN do it!!). But you will regret it if you don't try. I felt so incredible each time I had a baby. It was like "I REALLY did that?!!!" Though, oddly enough, I felt similar when I had my c-section. I felt awesome...

Good luck, and you can do it if you want to!!

If you are going to go natural, try to do it at home or in a birthing center where you are allowed to bath, move around, and do whatever is needed to keep you comfortable. Laboring in bed on our backs is so unnatural! I hope it all goes well for you!

I have 3 children all born natural (1 in a birth center and 2 at home). The amazing thing with natural childbirth is the body's ability to cope. If you give yourself enough time, endorphines release making it extremely doable. It is still painful and full of work, but the hormones actually worked like a little amnesia dose between contractions. I remember going through a contraction and then afterwards feeling great, relaxed and smiling and joking with everyone. When the next contraction kicked in, it was like, "Oh yeah! I remember this!"

And afterwards, the bonding and hormonal high is incredible. The babies are very alert, latch on for nursing immediately and my body feels tired but amazing at the same time.

Of course a lot of it had to do with my incredible midwives. They get to know you so well over time with the prenatal visits, that they have a good sense of what you need and can read your body language to anticipate your needs as well. This last time I gave birth, the contractions came on very fast and very hard. I was fighting them and my midwife came in and reminded me to breathe through them and let them flow through my body. It went from being a very painful and hard-hitting sensation to a powerful wave flowing through my body. It truly changed my mindset and made it a whole lot easier to go through.

I can honestly say I wouldn't give birth any other way. It's incredible and empowering and if you are able to experience it, you won't regret it with the right preparation.

You can get a free consultation at the birth center and they spend a lot of quality time with you. Andaluz Waterbirth Center www.waterbirth.net

I wanted to do a natural birth with my first born (Only child so far, so I have nothing to compare it to). My "fore-water" broke at 5am. I got to the hospital at 7am. They broke my "back-water" at 8am and I was 4cm dilated. I wasn't feeling any pain until 1:30pm (I felt the contractions but they weren't all that painful... In fact, the nurse was looking at the monitor during one of them and was amazed that I was able to laugh at a joke my boyfriend was telling me because apparently it was a VERY strong contraction). At 1:30pm I was at 7cm/8cm (She couldn't decide which one it was). I asked for something for the pain because once the pain hit, it really hit hard! She said it was too late but gave it to me anyway. By the time she had gotten the medication into me, I was at 9cm. The medication didn't help... At all. I had my son at 3:47pm. So even though I did get medication, I still consider it a natural birth since the medication didn't have time to work.

At the time, I thought I was crazy for not getting meds soon enough to work because when the time came I really wanted them! However, looking back, I'm glad I didn't and am going to try another natural labor next time around (My boyfriend thinks I'm crazy too).

I had my second naturally, and it really wasn't that bad. From what I understand, though, it might be genetic. My mom said it wasn't that bad for her.

I say, go for it if you want to. The only advice I would give is to give yourself a break if, for whatever reason, it doesn't work out the way you hope. I always hate to hear stories of women who have their heart set on their deliveries going one way and feeling disappointed or like a failure when it doesn't happen.

Oh, and consider a local anesthesia if tearing seems imminent. An unanesthetized episiotomy is NOT pleasant.

I had a kid both ways. I much preferred natural, it was easier to push and took less time. 6 hours less to be exact. Yes your body IS meant to handle it. Im pregnant again and i will probably opt for very minimal intervention. My husband thinks i should have my vagina numbed at least. It concerns him too and he was so scared for me the last time. You can get a partial epidural and choose which area to desensitize. me personally though......i want to feel my contractions, its easier to push and connect your brain to the process.

If you can get into a Bradley class do it. Otherwise research the Bradley method online. Also practice meditating a few times a week now. Take slow deep breaths and think about the beach or a nice vacation spot that you enjoy. Really imagine yourself there. Think about the colors and the smells of the place. This is how I got through labor. It helps to practice the deep relaxation now so you can switch it on when you need it. Also look into hydrotherapy. I had a waterbirth and it was beautiful. Yes you can do it.

A friend of mine was pregnant in high school and had a natural child birth. I think she was so brave to do choose to have a natural birth at the age of 17, and that if she could to it, most women could. (My 3 births have all been c-sections, but if I could have gone into labor on my own I would have LOVED to try a natural birth.)

Hi Mama-

I have not read the other posts, but I am a three-time "natural" childbirther. I have three great, really positive birth sotries to share if you want stories, but as for your question, the best advice I can give you is to make sure you have /everybody/ on your support team on board with your plan/goals. This starts with your Hubby and includes the L&D nurse(s) and your doctor. I would also HIGHLY recommend a doula, if you can swing it financially.

I found laboring to be tough, but I think if you have folks around you supporting the desire for a non-medicated birth then it can be achieved. They need to be there to suggest alternate methods and positions - walking, rocking on your hands and knees, crouching, sitting on a birthing ball, swaying, squatting, placing one foot up on a stool/tub edge, showering, etc. to keep your progress moving and NOT to suggest an epi. Also, the worse thing you could do is lay in bed. Whenever I have been in bed, especially on my back (i.e. for an internal exam), that is when I find the labor pains most intolerable. See if, when you have to be in bed, if you can get things like the exams or monitoring done while you are resting on your left side.

Also, I would recommend that you work to get deeply in touch with your body and then listen to it. What feels comfortable one moment, may not the next and you should listen and change things up as needed.

I think part of what makes non-medicated child birth tolerable is all the hormones. If you can keep the adrenaline down and eliminate as much fear as possible and create a safe haven where you feel loved and confident, I am sure you'll do great!

Good luck!
~C.

My first was natural. My second I asked for drugs the minute my feet hit the hospital. If I had to do it again, which I pray never happens I would do drugs again in a heartbeat!

Having gone natural with my first i had a horrible delivery and pushed over 3 hours while she kept popping in and out. They finally called for an emergency C section, but when the dr was in the parking lot she finally made her way into this world. My second I was laughing and telling jokes inbetween pushing. Both deliveries were done by a mid wife.

I went natural with both and NOT by choice. Once given the pitocin to progress my labor it went so fast they told me I couldn't have an epidural. I would take the epidural any day, same result and no pain, I am in!!! It doesn't make the experience less special and beautiful, it just makes it easier for you. As far as your husband I am sure he doesn't want to see you in that type of pain, but It really is your personal choice. Try it if you want to, but make sure you realize there may not be any turning back (no anesthesiologist on call to administer an epidural if you change your mind) Talk to your doctor and ask what your options would be should you decide to take the epidural at some point in labor, and get some feedback from him or her. Good luck in whatever you decide.

I felt the same way with my first. Plus my SIL had an awful experience with the epidural that encouraged me. I attended a Bradley Method class that gave me and my DH lots of techniques for pain management. We practiced often, all throughout the 3rd trimester (which was a nice bonus as well). They really work! I had 12 hours of back labor and was limited to certain positions because I needed a fetal heart monitor. But you can do it. It's true that it is less stabbing pain than an intense pressure. And the transition time is really intense, but the shortest time. Also during that time, you get such an adrenaline rush and an anticipation because you know it's over soon. So it's really not so bad-I think facing the unknown was the hardest part.

By the way, for my 2nd I had an epidural because I was induced and the labor was much quicker and harder. But the process of getting the epidural, the nurse coming in saying "I'm new" and proceeding to stick me 3 times, was much more intense than delivery. For my 3rd baby I am going natural again-much preferred to the epidural experience.

Tips: lavender scented massage lotion, relaxing music, walk around/stay vertical as much as possible

just be prepared for PAIN. I read all this advice about how lovely natural childbirth was, and I wasn't prepared for the pain the second time around. During my home birth, I really did think I was dying. My experience (30 hours) for the second time is uncommon....but just don't expect it to be completely manageable. Have some built in pain management plans....
good luck! you CAN do it and the recovery is So So SO much better!!!

I had intentions of getting the full epidural with my 2nd, but they gave it to me too late, and my son came too fast. It was quick, but REALLY painful. Yes I recovered fine. Good luck!

My second birth was much easier - and Natural. I was in labor total for about 3 hours and pushed twice. I can't lie, a natural birth is very intense, and quite painful, but my recovery was so much faster. I walked down the hall to my room after delivery and was home in less than 24 hours.

If you're going to try it, prepare yourself! Take a Bradley class or get hypnobirthing cd's. Mentally prepare for it, so that when you are in the midst of it you can go through with your plan for a natural birth. And, saying that, if it gets too intense, you can ALWAYS ask for pain medication.

There's no "extra-credit" for natural childbirth, lol!! I had epidurals for both and although my first labor was longer, the second one was more painful! I'd say try for it but if it gets unbearable, don't be afraid to ask for help!

Statistically drug-free births are much more successful for baby and mother when there is a supportive partner in the room. I suggest taking a class with your husband to prepare. If he's not the best partner for this situation, especially if he can't handle seeing you in pain, I recommend getting a doula.

I've only had one and I was "mostly" natural - I had Stadol 2 times (at 5 and at 7 centimeters) - no epidural. I wanted to have a natural childbirth (or as close as I could get) from the beginning. I didn't want an episiotomy. My docs were totally on board for that. My water broke at 10:30 pm on April 3rd, and my son was born at 8:30am on the 4th. Labor pains didn't really start till about midnight if I remember correctly. They had a "pain chart" of levels 1-10, with pictures of NON-smiley faces (LOL) for each one, and a short description. Though I felt like I couldn't make it a couple of times, I didn't get above a 7 on the pain chart.

What's really funny is that when I said "no epidural", that was apparently the signal for a pool to start among the maternity staff on how long I'd go before getting one - LOL! I never did, so I wonder who got the $. My husband thinks they gave me the best room cause I was such a trooper :)

You can do it. It's wierd - the pain is bad, but it's a "normal" pain - not an injury pain, so I think we can tolerate it more. I was OK about having another one after I had my son, like right after, so your body will deal with it and your brain will forget it - sort of.

I had an epidural for my first child...and went completely natural for my second. Honestly, I liked going natural better. I felt like I was empowered by the whole experience and had MUCH more control over the situation. (Sure, it was nice to watch a movie during the first birth, though!) I had a midwife who encouraged me in natural methods, so, just as others are saying, find support...a good midwife or a doula. I studied breathing techniques like crazy beforehand, and they REALLY helped me get through the harder parts of labor. I also was able to have hydrotherapy for some of the labor, which was incredible and helped me a lot (basically, I was in the shower). Having someone put counter-pressure on your back if you have back pain during labor is helpful, too. I suggest just being informed and educated...and going into it with an open mind. You can always opt for some sort of a drug if things get too tough, and that's OKAY...the beautiful baby at the end is really the goal anyway. However, the best thing to do if you want a natural birth is to prepare for one. It's NOT that bad. Yes, there IS pain, but it's pain with a purpose...and I think you'll surprise yourself as to what your body CAN do!!! Also, I watched the following DVD a lot...it was incredible and really prepared me for what to expect in a natural birth: http://www.officialchildbirthclassdvd.com/

Both my kids were natural and I loved it. I don't like being pregnant but I love the labor part. My labors were really quick, which is both good and bad. At the end I felt like Super Woman and I love that I was able to do it all on my own with no meds. I won't lie, it hurts, but after the baby comes out there is no more pain. I had a doula for both of my deliveries and that really helped. My first was born in the hospital. My second was born in a birth center. What I loved about the birth center was that I was able to move around and labor where I needed too. I had my daughter sitting on a birth stool, no feet by my ears trying to push. So no, natural childbirth really isn't that bad, you will be amazed at how well you did when it is all said and done.

With our first child I ended up taking the epidural....But was soo swollen after. Our second I had it as well but it didn't do much only because It was too late. Our third child...OH MY! I didn't have a chance to ask for it! Yes it was extremely painful and took about 15 minutes, it felt like someone lit a fire down there and I could literally feel the pain in my back, BUT after all of that, once I seen our adorable little angel I completely forgot about the pain-(mind you, I didn't know the sex of our younger two), my husband also wanted me to take the epidural because he would always say it was available for a reason meaning why go through all of the pain! Now as I was delivering our third, I cried and screamed and I can still rember the look on my poor husbands face, he was terrified! After the birth they took the baby and didn't announce if it was a boy or girl so I thought my husband left my side to go and see the baby, ended up being he was trying to leave the room and fainted by the door! Poor guy! But I think that they just don't want to see us women/wives in any pain only because I think it hurts them to see us in soo much pain and not beable to help. I don't know if I would do another (if we intend on having anymore!) natural child birth though, but would possibly think about it.
My MIL would always tell me that the more kids we have as women that the pain is less...THAT'S A LIE! or atleast from my experience! It all depends on your body, My sister had all seven of her kid's naturally without the epidural and she says it was normal for her and it wasn't that bad or painful.......I will say that when you do go into labor give it a try and see how much pain or discomfort you can take. Also, you mentioned about the tearing, I tore with our older two children and not with our third, I think it was because I literally felt it and when they told me to stop pushing I did and with the epidural I didn't feel if I was pushing or not.
Anywho- Congrat's on your pregnancy! I'm sure whatever you choose to do that it will work out...Hope you had a wonderful weekend!

I had an epidural with my first birth. With my second I went au naturale. I happened to give birth to the baby with the biggest head ever born (;-)). With my third, I INSISTED on an epidural! Good luck. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Both my kids were unmedicated births. One at the hospital, one at home.

If it's what you want to do, then go for it! I'm a different person and a better mom because of how my kids were born. That's not true for everyone maybe, but it definately is for me.

There are also benefits to baby by having an unmedicated birth.

My oldest was 20 hours and 2 hours of pushing. My youngest was under 5 hours and about 15 minute of pushing.

If you can afford it, having a doula present can be a great help for you and your husband both!

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/

trust your instinct, and your body.
do lots and lots of research and reading,
and do NOT expect your doctor to give you
all the information you'll need. They are in
the BUSINESS of birth and birth interventions.

Best wishes-

Both of my boys have been without an epidural. I had half a dose of stadol with the first and it knocked me out for about 20 minutes (…I think… I had lost all track of time at that point).

Both of my labors were similar in length and difficultly level. They weren't traumatic. I did, however, receive Pitocin with my first. If you plan on doing a birth without an epidural, make sure you let them know that you DO.NOT.WANT.PITOCIN!!!! My first labor was extremely painful. The contractions were relentless, one on top of the other, and felt like my insides were twisting all around.

I didn't get pitocin with my second (any time the nurses came near me with any sort of medication I demanded to see the label). I can tell you that the difference in pain level was night and day. Whereas I would describe my first labor as extremely painful (but not scarring enough to deter me from doing it again), my second labor was very uncomfortable and slightly painful at worst (and I pushed a 10 1/2 lb. baby out in 1.5 pushes). It's not a cake walk- but nothing unmanageable. If you learn to breathe through the contractions instead of tensing up, it makes a huge difference. That whole visualization thing really works. Best of luck!

I had a natural because the 4 epidurals they tried to put in wouldnt go in. My baby was sliding out as they were trying it the 4th time. I freaked out, because i didnt want to feel the pain, but really it was so fast. The contractions hurt and the baby pushing its way out. there is some burning but just push and get that baby out and you feel so much better. I only was in labor for 2 hours, so only 2 hours of pain. This was my 3rd baby though.

I've had two natural unmedicated births. I think the key is to be very committed mentally. Its tough, hard, and painful...no denying this. Thus you have to be committed. I did a lot of visualization, just mentally trying to prepare and accept I will be in a lot of pain, and I will work through it. I used music during much of my laboring to help me though. I stayed at home as long as possible and labored in a tub. the second time around things were 1/2 the time of the first birth. Its nice for it to go faster, but it makes me twice as intense during the actually pushing and delivery. It felt much more out of controol, as it just went so fast. Try Hypnobirthing to get your mentally prepared. It didn't help me much with my pain, but me in the right frame of mind. All this said, your body has to cooperate as well, with no issue and such. You can do it. Its painful, no denying it. Its also a limited time of pain and for a good purpose. This is coming from someone with relatively short labors and easy deliveries, so take it for what its worth. 7.5 hours for the first and 3.5 for the second.

So I see you already have 48 answers, and I'm sorry, but I don't have time to read them. I'll keep it brief (or try, anyway!).

I've had 4 natural births. Each one got better because my husband and I learned from each one. The main thing is that there will be bad pain. But it's all about how you cope with it. You need a tool box full of options, because there is no one-size-fits-all approach to pain management. Some things that worked for me (and not every time, and only for certain stages of labor): HypnoBirth imagery (wish I could have taken the whole course, but only found it at about 30 weeks. crammed and am thankful, because the explanation of how you can help the contractions work rather than work against them is SO HELPFUL! Borrow from the library.), deep diaphragm breathing, purposeful body relaxation, WATER!!! the tub is your friend, thinking to myself as I wiggled my fingers, "My fingers do not hurt. They are just fine. Feel that? Your fingers? They're not hurting one bit!" during each contraction of transition. My husband kept telling me to completely relax - we did the Bradley Method, and he was the best coach I could have asked for - but I told him, "I know what I'm doing" and explained later. Then he was like, "Oh, okay, cool!"

So, in summary, it's all in how you relax and cope with the pain, embracing it rather than fearing it. Fear promotes stress, stress promotes tension, tension causes pain (not to mention prolonging labor). Borrow these from the library: The Business of Being Born, HypnoBirth or HypnoBabies, Husband-Coached Childbirth (The Bradley Method) by Dr. Robert Bradley and read, read, read. Make sure to include your husband because when you hit the point where you say, "I can't do this!" (which you will, because you are human) that's the crucial moment where he has to say, "Yes you can, baby. You are doing this. You are a fierce, amazing woman whose body knows how to have this baby!" Because by that point you're ready to deliver and nothing will help but pushing!!

Blessings on a beautiful delivery!!

My labors were so fast that even if I wanted one it was too far in to get one by the time I wanted one with my first. My first was delivered after I went in for an ob appt and was 8 cm and sent up to labor and delivery and had him about 1.5 hrs later and when i wanted one it was already time to push. my second was delivered in the hallway between patient registration and the er literally seconds after arriving at the hospital. I really didn't have intense pain with contractions. With my first a dull back ache and with my second lots of pressure. In my opinion natural child birth is not that bad.

You will be surprised and amazed at what your body can do.

Way back when my kids were born, you rarely had much in the way of pain meds. I don't think epidurals were in very frequent use.

For my first, I did get something (I don't remember what it was) that helped me get back in control of it all.

The other 3 there were no pain meds except what they called a "pudental block" which supposedly helped but that was pretty far along. They also routinely did episiotomies, and stitched you up after. (The pudental block helped numb it for the episiotomy repair.)

My oldest was born in 1982, the youngest 1991 (I have 4 kids).

They had lamaze classes to help with all of that.

After the baby is born, I forgot all the pain.... it was worth it! My labors weren't really that long, except one where they had to use some pitocin to get it going properly. Even then, I think she was born about 7 hours after we got to the hospital.

Everyone's experience is different.
As for my experience with it, I had natural/unmedicated and uncomplicated deliveries with both my kids. I would have had more than 2 kids if all I had to do to have them was labor/delivery. It was the 9 months of pregnancy that kicked my butt.

If you take some classes to learn some techniques to deal with the pain (because there is pain) and how to have someone HELP you deal with the pain (breathing with you, counting for you, rolling a tennis ball for massage for you, feeding you ice chips, adjusting any music you might have/want, etc).

My words of wisdom are to talk at length with your doctor. What I did was tell my doctor what I desired to do (have a natural unmedicated childbirth) but that I was by no means setting anything in stone that I couldn't change later. If I decided half way through that I couldn't deal, then I wanted to be able to say "give me meds". (And quite frankly, about 5 minutes into 'transition' I was saying--- "epidural please", but it was too late in the process.) Once it was over though, it was over. I got up within a few minutes (after holding my baby, etc) and went to the bathroom. I even walked out into the hallway shortly after the birth of my first, b/c that is where the scale was and I wanted to see how much "baby weight" I lost in delivery, LOL.
I also discussed episiotomy with my doctor in advance. It used to be "standard" protocol, but isn't any longer. I told him that if he felt like I needed it at the time, then fine, but that I didn't want it "just for the sake of following some outdated protocol". I didn't get one either time, had MINOR tearing (2 stitches, that was it, and I didn't even feel the stitches), and no recovery complications from that at all.

So, is it scary and painful? Yes. Can you do it. Yes, you can (obviously barring a medical situation that prevents it). It is extremely empowering to do so. The adrenaline and endorphin rush after makes the bonding experience that much more powerful (I think. I don't have anything to compare it to.).

hth

Wow, you've gotten a lot of responses and I just wanted to give you my two cents. I did a completely natural/pain med free childbirth with pitocin and it was one of the most wonderful experiences of my life. My labor was easier because I could walk around, get in the tub etc. Transition (where the baby's head is going past the tail bone) was uncomfortable, but do able and the pushing was ecstacy. I would recommend you read a book about hypnobirthing to alleviate your fears. I think the more knowledge one has and the less anxiety one has the more calm and painfree the birth is. I also recommend getting a doula as they will help you during times when you think you can't go on if that happens. I wish you all the best! Natural childbirth is NOT bad..it's wonderful!

I went natural with both of mine (home birth actually), and I wouldn't do it any other way. Yes it hurts, but it's not that bad, and you know it will be over once the baby comes. It's a different kind of pain. I've had kidney stones twice so I know.

If it were really that bad, no child would ever have a brother or a sister ;-) BTW-- I have 3 kids, all natural.

I had 2 big babies with no drugs. I did lamaze classes and just as 8kidsdad's wife said, the best part was getting hubby involved and having them know more about the process and being right there helping instead of standing around wondering what to do. The breathing with Lamaze is wonderful for relaxing and helping manage the contractions. The best I can discribe it is this way. You breathe in a deep breath thru your nose concentrating on how the air feels going slowly into your nostriles, and into your chest. Then hold it for about 5 seconds concentrating on how the air fills your nose and lungs.Then slowly let the breath out thru pursed lips while concentrating on how it feels as it goes past your lips, and feels almost like you are whistling but not. If you practise this several times a day you can get to where you will think only of the air going in and out and it takes your mind to another place, and off the contractions. Its relaxing and calming. It can get you a long ways into heavy labor without a panic hurry up feeling. Once you need to push you take a deep breath faster thru your nose and blow it out faster thru your mouth, take another deep breath and hold it then pull yourself up or have your husband help push you up more into a sitting position and curl around your belly, and push while he counts calmly and softly to 10. Then you let the air out, and take another deep breath and do that again. If all goes well and youre lucky like I was, it will be easy and relaxing and your baby will be born soon. Our bodies were meant to do this, and most can. There are some who cant, and sometimes babies get in a position that makes it not work right. But for the most part its supposed to happen this way naturally. If you find a way to minimize the pain of contractions it makes it so much nicer and a better memory. Its better for the baby, and you to not have so many drugs. I know there are a lot of other methods out there now, but not having used them I cant say how they work, but Lamaze breathing worked great for me 2 times with 2 babys over 9 pounds each. I still use it now, when having a sliver taken out, or when I have some medical thing done that is uncomfortable. I just breathe slowly and concentrate on how the air feels going in and out and I forget about the pain. Start practicing now! And best of luck for a safe easy delivery.

hi,
i had my first 2 births at a hospital and my last standing on the floor of my own bedroom at home. i describe the experience at length in a blog entry: http://www.mothertameka.wordpress.com/2011/07/19/home-run...

but seriously, you can not only survive natural childbirth but also love it. do your own research, and don't let anyone else's fear limit you...

good luck,
tee

My second I was hoping on it being easier. My first was a long labor, but not horrible. Not pushing for too long (maybe 20 minutes) and no tearing. I was up and walking around almost immediately after. My second ended up being an emergency c-section. No two can be planned. BUT - like another mom said, there is no award for doing it with all of the pain. There is a reason they make the drugs for us, becaue it hurts!! A lot of mom's can do it, and if you can congratulations - it never even crossed my mind to not have drugs. I went in to my first appt with all 3 kids asking my doc if we could start the epidural then!

Natural childbirth really isn't that bad, especially if you are able to eliminate stress as much as possible during labor. Out of four children, two of ours were completely natural and were extremely easy births and problem free recoveries. Honestly, my worst contractions with either of them were nowhere near the pain I experienced with the pitocin used for the induction of my first. And the labors were not as long or difficult as my fourth (who I did end up using an epidural for because I was not able to relax enough for the labor to progress). In my experience, my stress level was directly related to the amount of pain I had. For my first natural birth, my nurse was actually a very experienced doula, and she was amazing. Words cannot describe how much of a difference her calm demeanor and her intelligent guidance made in getting me through the birthing process. I am not exaggerating when I say that I did not know I was about to give birth until she checked me and called for the doctor. I had my child less than five minutes later. While it hurt, it was very temporary and very bearable. For my second natural birth, it was an entirely different scenario: waking up in the middle of the night and realizing I felt just like I did when the nurse called for the doctor during the birth I just described to you; having to wait for our babysitter to arrive and for my husband to drive me to the hospital fifteen minutes away; having to CHECK IN at the stinking hospital even though we had pre-registered to avoid having to be delayed by checking in; and then, nearly giving birth in the hallway waiting for a room. The staff was not patient or overly kind, the doctor was what you would call brusque, and I was extremely stressed out. It hurt a lot more, but I think it was due to my fear and stress. Honestly, I think a good doula is a worthwhile investment if you seriously want to go natural; makes all the difference.

If you are going to try natural childbirth in a hospital setting, I would highly recommend looking for a doula. A doula is trained to provide information and support to laboring women. She would be a resource as far as remembering different comfort measures during labor and will take the pressure off of your husband provide all of the physical support. Labor and delivery nurses can be very helpful, but they are usually assisting more than one laboring mom and have tons of paper work, etc. to tend to as well. A doula is there for you and only you. Many will provide pro-bono services as well, if cost is an issue.
www.dona.org
Good luck! It's totally worth it, but also remember that you are not a failure if you end up deciding to go with the epidural!

Well, I don't really have any "words of wisdom" for you, but I did have a natural childbirth! Mostly I was just scared... Scared of the unknown, I guess. Of course, it hurt - haha. But if it tells you anything, I would do it naturally again in a heartbeat. :)

I had two 10 lb babies. The first took four hours. The final stages of labor was so fast that it was like this: Doctor, the baby is coming now! It's crowning, give her some meds. The baby is here! It is a boy!--- In other words it was so fast, the meds didn't have time to work. I was so energized!

So when baby no 2 came along and they told me it was big too and I would take a long time to deliver, Did I want any meds? I said no. She took two hours, and no meds. Again it was a thrill to be so filled with love for this little girl and my husband and to be able to do this on my own.

My impression of meds (from past 30+ years) is that active labor is work but if you learn your breathing techniques it doesn't hurt. And I do mean that labor is hard work--nothing easy about it. I would do labor again over toothache and kidney stone any day. Easily. And I have had both.

My husband and I also took the Lamaz classes that were available through my hospital. Great stuff. Try to find something like that.