My First Weekend Get-away... Help!

My husband wanted lists and schedules. So, I basically went through the kids entire day, and told him what we usually do, what they eat, what they are allowed to watch on tv, etc. I included doctor's numbers, medicine doses, etc. I had outfits picked out for the little ones, just to reduce his stress level.
I basically preplanned as much as I could for him. I wanted it to be a great time for all of them.

I have two suggestions:
1. I write "love notes" to my kids (they take turns opening them) for each day that I'm out of town. I also leave a small treat (sticker, candy, or even a finger puppet from a set) for each day I'm gone. They love it!
2. Read "The Kissing Hand" and make sure you give them and they give you kissing hands before you leave.

I agree with the calender. The last one I made for a three year old was because her mom was going to be gone for two weeks.
Part of what helped is that we made it with just a blank paper and made a grid with seven days across and about six weeks on it.
We put two weeks that had already been over so we could cross them off just after the calender was made.
We also left lots of time after the mom would be back so that the time she was gone did not look so long.
We only put grandma coming and mom back on the calender.
The three year old also decorated the page with stickers, and had the option of markers.

Hope that is what you were looking for.

It will be good for your husband to see what you do for the family. Enjoy your trip.

S.
mother to Kai
www.HomeWithKai.com

Hello and Happy well deserved vacation! I hope you have a ball! One little tiny thing that might help when saying good-bye (after of course explaining where you're going, show them a map, show them how a calendar works to check off days etc.) but it might be somthing as simple as giving them kisses good-bye (keeping all smiles!) and leave kisses in each of their littles hands so they can "save" them for when they miss you - they can use those extra kisses when they feel like they need them. And dad can remind them that they're always there. Good luck and enjoy some time away with family.
Hugs!

If that's pathetic, I must really be too! I've never been away for longer than an overnight from my 8 & 5 YO boys.
How much do your kids cling to you when you're home? If they're very mom-oriented, how about wearing a shirt for part of the day, making sure to wear your usual perfume & throwing it into a gallon baggie. Do one shirt for each kid to sleep with. I do that for my hubby when he deploys & it keeps a scent for a few weeks in the bag. Aside from that, just trust that Daddy can do it too. And don't call constantly to check up on them (him) because hubby will think you think he can't do it himself.
Have a great time-they're in good hands!

People at my house get so grumpy when they are hungry. It's always nice to have easy. No-brainer healthy snacks and ingredients for simple meals ready and waiting.
You are not pathetic for being with your children. While you probably do deserve a break, there is nothing pathetic about helping create three healthy human beings to make a positive difference in the world. That is honorable, and you are devoted! Enjoy your break but know that your work is beyond valuable. best wishes!

To your question. If you own a phone that has access to internet with a cam , or even pictures, have your husband check in with you everyday so that you can see the kids, and him. Hope this helps. Have a great day. A.

Boy i know the feeling. But i think that your absence will help you and your family. I am sure you can use a web cam of some sort, but i think in the end you will find that you have been missing out a little.
Also, take along a pillow case with the kiddos scents on them and at least when you go to bed at night you will still be with them all. (you honeys cologne).
I am a mom of 4 (15,11,7,4) there are some days i can't wait for those getaaways.
Good luck and god bless!! Have fun and relax they are with their daddy

I see nothing pathetic about you not being away from your kids. I have three kids as well, and other then being in the hospital to have a child or for medical reasons, I have never been away from mine in 8 years. Even when I go on vacation to see my mom, I take my children with me. But what I did to help me out when I was in the hospital was find friends and family to help my husband out when ever he needed it. He never needed the help, but it helped me relax knowing that he had help. I wish you luck, and have fun.

We do a calender with the important things for the day on it. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, bedtime, anything special. Someone gets to put a sticker on each even when it's done. This helps the kids see when you are going to get back. We also do Skype, if you have computers with cameras. It's free. My husband and I have been gone much more than what we would have liked, sometimes both at the same time. The kids do great with it. The biggest key we've found is not to let the kids know how much you don't like it, or they will think there is something that they should be worried about. We just each did a 3 day stint with both of home for only 10 hours in between. The kids did just fine. Ours are all about to have birthdays at 1, 3, and 6. Have fun! I know it's impossible to not think about the kids, but think of all the fun you're having that you couldn't have without them. That usually helps me.

When traveling, I have found that emailing a short note home every night (or every other) helps ease both my childrens' anxiety and my own. Occasionally I'll also add a picture from the events of the day. My kids have also enjoyed doing the same. Whoever is staying with them helps them type a note for me and they love being able to tell me all about their days when I'm not home. I have also found that getting on the phone with them actually tends to make the separation anxiety worse, so this is a good substitute. It is a nice ritual our family enjoys at the end of the day while one of us is away from home. Good luck and have fun!

I've found that I am the one who gets the anxiety so much more so than my daughter! lol. but some things we do (for me okay but she likes it) I will write her a note, or record a little song of me singing to her on the camera that Daddy or the aunt she is staying with depending on if she's at home or with them that she gets to have read to her (she's 3) or played for her. I also let her have a digital camera to take pictures for mommy. it's a fun bonding moment when I get back to look at them with her and it helps the sitter if she does start asking for mom to say, lets get the camera out and take some pictures of our day for her.
plus then I don't feel like I missed everything. not pathetic, we're moms we just worry about our kids. now for you--take some pictures if it will help you. or a stuffed animal or something that will help you while you are gone. my dd spent the night at my sisters last night and I slept with one of her blankets. corny maybe but it helped me. lol. it's okay to take a break. it's hard to not feel guilt because we are moms and we love our kids but it is healthy to do so to come back and be rejuvinated and happy to see them, and it is healthy for them to learn to take care of themselves through our example. good luck. have fun, and don't forget to stop and just breathe. it will all work out.

They will feel your anxiety. So, I agree to make it positive! They get to have a super-fun time with daddy! Let them know that it is their responsibility to help daddy out, and behave themselves. Dad can call if he has questions. Otherwise relax.

I have had to leave my son a couple times for work. I stressed about every little thing at first, especially when he refused a bottle from my husband for 2 full days!! He was fine, and well taken care of. It actually helped me not worry, and to truly realize what a great dad my husband is. And it allowed me to take some evenings for myself after that.

I think the first time being away is always the hardest. There really is no miracle anxiety cure for that one unless you medicate. Have faith in your husband. He is not going to let anything happen to them. Once you have left and talk to your husband and he lets you know that they are just fine then you will relax some. Hopefully he will call you if he is in a bind and needs some mommy advice. One thing that might help is if you have a local family member or girl-friend that could be available to help your husband if need be. Just knowing that he has help might relieve that anxiety a bit.
Hang in there. Your leaving them with Dad and they will be fine. Plus, it will be good for Dad to appreciate you that much more:)
A.

I have five year old twin boys and a 2 year old boy and I write them notes on the rare occasion that I am gone. I will write the day and their names, so it will say Luke- Thursday, Luke-Friday, Luke-Saturday, and so on for each child and my husband would hand them out and read them the notes. My kids love getting mail and my husband said they looked forward to reading their individual notes and they would play with them and read them on and off through out the day. They even "wrote" some back so I had a special stack of notes when I got home that they were proud to show me. It made me feel like they had a peice of me and that I was thinking of them. I even did them for my hubby ;)

awesome ideas so far (wish I saw some of those before I took trips!).

the one thing I did for my daughter when she was three was make a "hug jar". I let her help decorate it, and then I told her that I would fill it full of hugs and kisses, and anytime she was missing me she could open it and think about me hugging her. I let her see me "fill it up", too. Just gave her hugs and pretended to drop them in the jar and quickly close it. She really liked it. My mom (who watched her when I was gone) said she would be playing and would randomly get up and get a "hug".

Enjoy your trip!

I can completely relate! I went through this with my daughter a few weeks ago where I was gone for 3 days and then two weeks later was gone for 5 days and I was so worried. The first 3 day period went so well that I had no reason to worry for the 5 day one. My husband and daughter had such a fun time and really bonded. It was great for their relationship and we moms need a break, too. Your husband probably won't do things exactly like you do, but it will all be OK and he will figure it all out. My only advice is to trust in your husband as the father of your 3 kids and know that everything will be fine.

When my second was just about 2 months old, I had to go to Texas and help my sister plan her wedding and get married. I left my kids with Dad. It was SO hard for me. I knew I couldn't take them with me - oldest was in school and I knew I wouldn't have time to care for a 2 month old child while doing last minute wedding planning.

I made it seem as positive as possible for my oldest (at 2 months, oddly #2 didn't really care!) I promised to call every night at bedtime and promised I'd bring something home for them. It was nothing super swell - it was a t-shirt that said "Dallas" with a picture of a Precious Moments cowgirl on it.

In March last year, my husband and I came to Montana for a job interview. My Mom stayed with the kids - it was 2 nights. Again, promised to call every night and promised a gift. Bought them each a small stuffed animal that said "Montana" on it.

Your kids will miss you and you'll miss them. But, calling around bedtime helped and they were rewarded for their good behavior with their surprise.

Just make it sound as positive as possible. Tell them that they GET to stay with Daddy. Promise to call at least once a day and bring them a little something. Then, take a deep breath and go - it's hard, but the entire world won't stop, trust me. Go have fun and enjoy your kids that much more after your trip.

I know you already have a lot of good suggestions. I just wanted to add that I, too, recently left for a solo weekend just after my son turned three. It ended up being SO GOOD for ALL of us! Honestly, it was probably harder on me than it was on him or my husband. I definitely missed them and thought about them all of the time, but they did wonderful...and it was SO nice to have to only think about myself for three days!

Keep it positive! Be excited about your trip and be excited about their special time with Daddy. Don't show that you are anxious or nervous or anything. You can let them know that you will miss them and think about them, but don't let it be a sad thing. They will follow your lead.

It will be wonderful. You will feel renewed energy and be excited to return home and the kids will have a fun time with Daddy!