My son is almost 3, and so far he is taking after his dad in all areas. He looks like his clone and he even has this need to be at home almost 99% of the time. Right now it's Sunday and I'm itching to get out of the house--just even be outside playing in our yard on this beautiful day, but my son and husband just want to fart around inside the house and be boooorrrriiing. I feel like I have to twist this kids' arm to get him to go play outside, and then when he does he's asking to go in after 5 minutes. When I was a kid, I LIVED outside. I don't remember ever playing inside the house--that's just where we ate and slept. Does anyone else have a toddler like this? I thought toddler boys were supposed to be go go go constantly, but mine is such the opposite of that.
*i guess I should clarify* I do want to do more outings on the weekends, but I'm also home with the kids all week while my husband is at work. On the weekends, he just wants to relax and not drive anywhere (his daily commute is a beast!) and spend time with us. They play together on the weekends, we don't have the TV on all day. We actually do not even turn the TV on at all until my kids are in bed for the night, and that's when my husband plays his xbox games. My post is more about your child's personality I guess, and how it can clash with your own. I'm a lot more outgoing and like to get out of the house more, while my boys are content and happy staying home-my son is just a homebody. He is not lazy, he doesn't watch TV, he would just rather be at home reading books or playing imaginary games (he's obsessed with costumes and will not break character haha) then running around digging holes and being crazy.
nope!!! I would suggest that daddy get off his sweet patooty and head outside as well - maybe little man will start copying big man!
My kids are 50/50 - they love the XBOX but also LOVE to play outside...I let them play in the rain too - so they don't have an excuse really!!!
Maybe make something fun for him to do outside?!
GOOD LUCK!!
I'd bring the costumes and books outside to your back yard...let him play or read in the great outdoors. Maybe that would help to nudge him out of the house. Then bring him to the park, in costume....to the mall, in costume...to the zoo, etc. You see where I'm going with this? He likes to be in costume, so it's a good compromise--you will let him wear it, but he's gotta get out of the house too.
Ok so if you just want to know what child takes after which parent....
My son is a lot like me: social & likes to go do things.
My stepdaughter is a lot like her father: stays inside & doesn't NEED to
go anywhere.
Interesting thing about genetics, right?
If your son likes to be inside, I say try to be active inside, take him to the
park once in awhile when dad's at work for a short bit. Not too long or
he'll hate it.
Also, during the week YOU plan outings for you & child: park, short walk , mall (bring stroller in case he gets tired), outdoor events (apple hill
type, fairs, farmers markets etc).
Work with what you've got. ;) That's what I have to do w/a split personality household. :)
Both my girls are home bodies but will play outside when a friend is over. We also bought a trampoline recently (they are 11 and 14) since the swing set no longer drew them outside. We recently bought the 11 year old one of those huge bubble wands and half a gallon of bubble liquid, and she will go outside alone (without sis or friend) and do that. We also play frisbee together, and I bought a true heavier frisbee that I used during my college days, not the cheapie often free give-away light frisbee that does not fly well. We have a kite, a crocket set, a kids golf set with targets, razor scooters, bikes, big drive way chalk, flower pots and soil and seeds, a sprinkler for hot days, shovels and buckets for snow-mountain at the end of the driveway days (we are near Boston), spray bottles with food coloring to color in snow, etc.etc. You may need to get your little man some new outside toys, and some friends who love playing outside.
i have 4 boys (the oldest just turned 7) so we are outside all the time. it is easy to get them out because they like to play with each other and their friends. however, when my oldest was a toddler i would have to play outside with him. try playing baseball or football, mine all love to swing the bat and try to catch. get a dumptruck and let him run it up and down the block or fill it with dirt. surprisingly a big bucket of water is always a hit around here even with the older ones. also i take all my kids on a neighborhood walk almost everyday usually to a park but sometimes we just walk. we point out different bugs and trees and animals and stay near home. maybe challenge dad to a game outside. my kids all have different levels of wanting to be inside or outside but i find wherever i go they are sure to follow:)
We got our yard fenced in when our daughter was about two. If she went outside, I went with her. When she was about four, I told her she could go outside by herself, knowing she was safe in the yard. She stood out there and cried for several minutes before she came in. When I was four, my mom through me outside, and I spent hours exploring our huge yard (we live on a farm). I never left the yard area, but I was definitely out of my mother's sight.
It took my daughter several months before she was willing to go outside by herself regularly, and it is still not her favorite thing. Kids are just different these days, or maybe the parents are.
Sounds like your son is an introvert like his Daddy - someone who recharges by gathering their own energy from inside themselves rather than being outside running around. This is not a bad thing - it really isn't. Here's where your problem lies, however.
My guess is that, like me and most other SAHMs you see your weekend as your social time with your family. I mean, come on - you've been cooped up in the house all week or running the errands and it's your weekend, too, right? And I also guess that you are probably MOSTLY an introvert as well, right? However - 40 hours alone, or alone with a child under the age of 5 is HARD WORK. And doing some of the stuff you would like to do - go for a hike, take your children to the park, go to a museum - may not be within your grasp during the week while your husband is at work because of your work at home.
If what I have written above here hits home at all, let me tell you this - it gets better when the kids go to school, but only slightly. Like your husband - my husband works hard during the week and does not like to have to do anything that resembles hard outdoor activity on the weekend. (Getting leaves raked is a bit of a bear around here - thank goodness we live in a forest so no lawn mowing!) Until then getting outside is on you, unfortunately.
What my husband and I have done is develop a bit of a routine for our weekends. Saturdays we go together to a farmer's market (outside) before going to Barnes & Noble's train table (inside) and running any errands we need on top of that and going home. Then he and my son are free to watch football (and there is a lot of football in this house) and play legos unless there is something specific and important going on like my college homecoming or an exhibit or a hike that we planned out the week before. Just springing the "Oh, come on - I am cooped up in here all week and now it's time to go out" argument SO doesn't work. Not unless you want the "Then you go without us" response.
So, go ahead and make plans with your husband - but make sure you don't make every weekend a BIG weekend or it will become a chore for you and your husband. Besides - sometimes it's nice just to rattle around the house, both inside and out, and sometimes it's nice to be out on your own or with friends.
maybe we should trade kids :) KIDDING!
my son and i are the opposite of you and your boy. honestly i would sit curled up on the couch with a book all weekend if i had my choice (and things like housework and responsibilities didn't get in the way of course!) my son is a go-go-goer (i have even had teachers, parents and grandparents who have known LOTS of kids, tell me how extremely energetic he is!) and i can't keep up with him. i feel so guilty when i am sick or he is, and we spend most of the weekend not doing anything, because i can see how extremely bored he is. (he was sick last weekend, and this weekend i am recovering from having a tooth pulled). normally we will go to a park, or if the weather is bad walk around the mall (it has lots of places for the kids to run around and play, we don't usually buy anything lol). i bet your little boy would like something like that. take him out without his daddy. set up a play date or meet someone at a park. take him to the library and let him pick out some books. the two of you will have to meet in the middle. at least when my son pushes me to constantly be on the go, i know he's right, sitting at home is not the healthiest! so you know you're right, so push away :) he's not even three...he doesn't need to have a vote. get him out of the house for his own good :) once he's out i'm sure he'll have fun too!
Your question isn't JFF, it's not a poll, it's a genuine question. My son wasn't any more active than my daughter as a toddler and preschooler. They both loved to spend time outside. Your son may be looking to spend time with daddy. Why not plan more outings - parks,zoos,aquariums. What does your son like to do in the house? If he enjoys his toys or helps dad with projects, that's good for him. If he's sitting in front of the tv with dad, I'd say to put a limit on daytime viewing. When you remember playing outside all day as a kid, you probably were not that young and not alone, you probably had siblings and in those days, kids roamed the neighborhood and found friends - but those were elementary aged kids, not toddler/preschoolers. He may find outside boring without another kid. Does he ever have playdates? A playmate might make it more enticing to spend time outside.
I understand where you are. I'm not a go-go-go person by any means but I do get cabin fever and want to get out sometimes! I like being social and doing things. My husband is just the opposite - EXTREME introvert and would stay home 24/7 if he could. I know it's not healthy for the kids so I make plans for us and we go. The oldest HATES going out (probably b/c his dad raised him) and frequently complains but I make him anyway. The youngest usually loves it. He's "busier" than any of us! My husband sometimes goes along but mostly doesn't. That's the part that makes me crazy b/c I end up always having to take care of the kids, do things with them and end up looking like a single mom while all of the other couples have both parents there. Very aggravating but I figure it's best to suck it up for the kids (and to cure my cabin fever). When he looks back and realizes he didn't do anything with our kids that will be his fault...opportunity knocks but once!
So plan something away from the house. Make it clear that they are invited to go too...but plan anyway regardless.
Then GO. And if they go with you...great! If not, be sure to talk about what a GREAT time you had.
The next day you want to get out...do it again.
And hopefully, they'll want to go too!
